My Last

by Stefania Gil

“I'm leaving, Jen,” Rick said, smiling. James just came in. “He winked at me.”

  “Do you have a nervous tick in your eye, Rick?”

  “Enjoy the company, both of you.”

  “I don’t have a choice,” I said, snorting.

  “Do you think it's a secret you ate each other slooowly?”

  I blushed.

  “Did he say something to you?” I asked curiously.

  “No,” Rick smiled “however, you just confirmed it for me.”

  “Get out Rick, see you tomorrow.”

  “Good-bye, my dear,” he smiled mischievously closing the door behind him.

  A few minutes later, there was another knock.

  “Come in.”

  James entered with a smile painted on his face. He strolled over to me and gave me a light kiss on the lips.

  “Don’t make this as a habit, James,” I said, pulling myself away from him.

  He stared at me directly in the eyes.

  “I wouldn’t mind getting used to you.”

  All warning alerts began to sound in my mind, “beware of this man, he can become a love problem”

  Before I could respond, he turned and walked out of the office again.

  What game was he playing?

  I initiated my ritual of turning off the computer and everything else in the office considering I was going home.

  I listened to a cell phone ringing incessantly.

  Like those calls that recur repeatedly.

  I left the office and went to the area where James was working. He was painting one of the walls. He wore the top of his work jumper tied around his waist and a white T-shirt that left his strong, bronzed arms uncovered.

  His cell phone was on the steel counter and it kept ringing.

  “If you don’t want to answer the call, you could put it on silence. So the noise doesn’t torment us all.”

  James’ back was turned to me. He didn’t even move when I spoke to him.

  “James,” I repeated a little louder.

  I picked up the phone to take it to him.

  Unintentionally, I read:

  “Incoming Call: Rebel Little Mouse”

  Rebel Little Mouse?

  When I reached him, I realized he had his headphones on with the music blaring.

  I put the cell phone in front of his face.

  He turned and snatched it from me, giving me a serious look.

  I raised my palms and said, “It was ringing nonstop, and the noise was driving me crazy.”

  He ignored my justification and answered.

  “Yes?” He pinched the bridge of his nose. I moved away but not very far. The truth was I was curious to hear the conversation with Rebel Little Mouse.

  It wasn’t like I cared. Pifft. He had his life and I had mine.

  It was simple curiosity.

  “No, Sophie, it's in the right drawer,” he continued. “Get out of there now. Kiss.”

  “I have to go. Good-bye,” he said, picking up his car keys, putting his cell phone in his pocket and leaving the florist in a hurry.

  I was more curious than I had been with the call from Sophie aka: The Rebel Little Mouse. Who was the woman in James' life who made him run like that?

  Suddenly, I could have slapped myself for being so curious.

  What did I care about James's life?

  The less I knew, the better. Just as I had always done with my friends from casual encounters. And that is what James was, a friend from a casual encounter. Period.

  ***

  It had been two days since James had left after the call from his Rebel Little Mouse and not knowing was making my life impossible.

  I decided to call him, with the excuse of wanting to know when he would return to work. I didn’t want to inquire into his private life.

  At the exact moment I was going to dial his number, a call came in. It was James.

  “Hello,” I said embarrassment in my voice.

  “How are you? Are you okay?”

  “Yes, I'm very sorry I left the flower shop the way I did. I had an emergency and that’s why I haven’t been to work.”

  “Oh! What kind of emergency?” What did I care? How could I think about asking him something like that?

  “With a relative.”

  AHA! Of course I did! A relative? A family member you call a Rebel Little Mouse? I thought.

  “Take all the days you need,” I answered sincerely, thinking it was very childish of him to try to convince me it was “a relative.”

  “Thank you. It will be more than expected and will greatly delay your remodel. Tomorrow I'm sending two people I have available to finish everything as soon as possible and I will supervise them until they finish the job.”

  How serious was it? Wasn’t he going to finish the job himself?

  “If there's anything I can do to help,” I said, remembering how kind he had been to me the day he'd sent me a message supporting me during the time of Sam's accident.

  “Thank you Jen, I'll keep that in mind, but my life is a bit complicated.”

  I suddenly felt like I'd been kicked in the stomach. I wanted to believe his comment was perfect, however, it was a fatal blow.

  Fatal.

  Noticing I didn’t say anything, he continued:

  “I was just calling to tell you why I hadn’t shown up for work and how it will be solved.”

  “Very well,” I said diplomatically. “We'll see you when the job is finished. I hope everything goes well with your relative.”

  I pinched the bridge of my nose and closed my eyes when I realized he had emphasized the last words. I was behaving like I were his girlfriend. A chill ran down my spine just thinking about it.

  “Thank you. Goodbye.” He hung up.

  I stared at my cell phone for a few seconds. It was then I discover my subconscious hidden intentions.

  It was not good, nothing good, everything I was feeling.

  It seemed I liked James more than I should and that ... was not good.

  ***

  When you are determined to fight something, especially when that something is a “someone” who invades your thoughts day and night, you must keep as busy as you can so your brain doesn’t have time to think.

  In order not to think about James, I decided to stay very, very busy.

  His employees arrived at the florist's shop just as he indicated in his last phone call.

  Since then, I heard nothing from him.

  Those were very busy days.

  One morning Holly came to visit me, explaining just that morning she realized she had run out of money when she was doing her weekly shopping at the supermarket.

  I already said that was going to happen soon!

  It was totally logical!

  As expected, I offered her money and she refused. She told me she had already spoken to Paul and he would help her until she got a job.

  Which she would start looking for that morning. I was very happy for her.

  That night, James' employees finished the remodel.

  Everything was great.

  “Isn’t James planning to come and visit us again?” Rick asked me before closing the florist.

  “I suppose he's coming soon to check his employees’ work and to settle the accounts with me.”

  “What did you do to him, Jen?”

  I glared at Rick furiously.

  “Why do I have to be the one who did something to him?”

  “Because I know you. That man was interested in you and it is very strange that after you have sex with him, he has not wanted to return.”

  “He had an emergency, I explained.”

  “Of course, but it still seems very strange to me.”

  “Perhaps he is married, and his emergency was linked to one of his children.” That conclusion had popped in my mind after replaying our last telephone conversation. Especially when he told me the emergency had been with a relative. At the moment I didn’t believe him because who gives a relativ
e a nickname like “Rebel Little Mouse”. A father for his daughter, for example. Just as some called their daughters “cupcake” or “pumpkin”. It was not surprising there were some more original, so to speak.

  “You are so dumb!” Rick looked at me ironically. “Haven’t you noticed he doesn’t wear a wedding ring? Stop being so suspicious.”

  “It doesn’t take a ring to be married or in a relationship. It was pretty clear when he said: My life, it's complicated.”

  My stomach churned remembering his words.

  “You like him, right?” Rick asked suspiciously.

  “Rick, let's be honest.” He tried to dismiss my words as they came out. “He's a handsome man, and anyone would like him.

  Rick sighed.

  “You’re a lost cause.”

  “Goodbye, Rick. Sleep well.”

  I got in my car and went home.

  That night I couldn’t sleep. I was unable to stop thinking about James.

  The next morning, I couldn’t do my Yoga routine due to not being able to concentrate on the postures.

  I arrived at the florist shop in a very bad mood.

  I couldn’t understand how a man had managed to upset me. First, I didn’t know him. I knew nothing of him and second, we had only one sexual encounter. Yes, a very good one indeed, but it was absurd not to be able to stop thinking about him.

  “How nice to see you!” I heard Rick say out loud. I almost had a nervous breakdown considering I knew, that phrase and the way he said it, it could only refer to one person: James.

  In fact, James knocked on my office door a couple of times before entering without waiting for a response.

  “Good morning,” he said with a smile.

  That smile was killing me.

  “Good morning,” I said indifferently. I didn’t know how to behave when I was in his presence.

  “I'm going to get some coffee,” I heard Rick say.

  I also heard him boldly locking the florist shop door with a key so no one could enter while James and I were there, alone.

  James left my office and headed to the newly remodeled area. He inspected it carefully and when he was satisfied, he stared at me directly in the eye.

  “Let's go to your office to adjust the accounts.” He glanced at his watch. “I'm in a bit of a hurry.”

  He followed my steps in silence. We entered the office, and unconsciously closed the door.

  He turned walking over to me.

  He intended to cradle my face in his hands but I dodged his movement. Not really, considering two seconds later I was enveloped in his arms and with his mouth invading mine.

  How difficult it is to describe the sensations running through me!

  Excitement, no doubt and rage, and lots of it.

  It felt like he was playing with me and I didn’t understand why.

  Or for what?

  “I missed this,” he said, stepping away from me.

  By now, my breathing was choppy and my heart was pounding.

  “How have you been?”

  “Let's settle the James accounts, you're in a hurry,” I said, and reproached myself silently for my stupidity. What the hell was I thinking? I sounded like the typical offended woman because the man she likes doesn’t like her.

  He studied me and a sly smile etched across his face making neurons blank.

  However I could, I recovered. I ordered my nerve cells to concentrate on something else since we had to talk business with Mr. Golden Skin with a killer smile.

  It was a bit complicated, considering every now and then, in the middle of our conversation, our eyes were caught in a pitched battle of burning glances.

  When we had everything settled, he got up and skirted my desk until he was facing me.

  He bent down and kissed me again. This time it was soft and calm.

  “We're going to have dinner tonight,” he said stepping away heading to the office door. “I'll come by at eight. This way, because I suppose you're not going to give me your home address,” he said with an arched eyebrow and a rather ironic tone.

  “I can’t,” was the first thing I said. Actually, I could. I knew dinner would end with dessert in bed, but I couldn’t make it that simple.

  I didn’t question why I didn’t want to make it so simple. Had I detected it, I would have realized, James liked me more than I thought.

  Also, I would have realized my behavior confirmed how much I liked him.

  Sigh.

  He smiled.

  “Okay, I'll call you next week to see when you can.”

  He left the office.

  ***

  The next few days passed in the blink of an eye. There was so much work at the florist shop, we were exhausted late in the afternoon. I was going home as soon as I finished the daily scheduled tasks.

  Also, my dear friend Holly received some good news. It was a business opportunity for us both.

  It all started with the excellent news of S & C Bakery making a very good job offer Holly couldn’t refuse.

  On the day of the interview, she called me to have dinner at her house. When I arrived she gave me the news. I was very happy for her. It had also coincided with a call from the insurance company —which Sam had hired— to inform Holly that Sam, had life insurance. That money, would help solve her financial issue for a long time.

  In addition to her new job, Holly was infused with such joy she began to act a little more normal. Although, Claire told me she continued to behave strangely sometimes, above all, she spoke alone most of the time. I advised Claire to talk to her and propose a doctor’s visit with

  Rose. I knew Holly would reject the proposal once again, but I had to try. I hoped her daughter would encourage her to take the plunge.

  That weekend I slept at her house. Saturday night, we settled to talk on the comfortable sofa in her living room with a bottle of wine, like we did in the old days. Holly mentioned she had met Steve, Susan's brother, and perhaps, in the future, I would meet him.

  My friend wanted to be a love procuress for me but it wasn’t going to work. She, like Dr. Rose and Rick, thought I should trust and fall in love with someone.

  I thought about James, and held back the desperate desire to tell Holly everything happening between us and how I felt about it.

  My friend was going through a very good stage after losing her husband, for me to come and tell her about my strange feelings for James.

  Yes, strange considering I didn’t want to be so attracted to him.

  One bottle of wine turned to two and I didn’t want to drive home, so I stayed with them convincing Holly to go with Claire, to the beauty salon the next morning.

  I wanted to do women things to see if the smell of the nail polish would drug me enough to make the feel of James’ strong arms, the taste of his mouth and his wonderful smile, disappear from my thoughts.

  On Sunday, after leaving the beauty salon and having a pleasant time with Holly and Claire, we sat down to have hot chocolate.

  A call from my cell phone interrupted us.

  “I'm sorry, girls,” I said. “I have to answer it.”

  “Hello,” I said.

  “Jen, how are you?”

  “Very well, Lucy. And you?”

  “Fine thanks. I'm calling because I'm in serious trouble and I need your help.”

  “Oh! You don’t say! Tell me what I can do for you.”

  “Well, in Carla’s family” —Carla was her future daughter-in-law—, “there is a history of diabetes, heart problems and obesity and until today, I hadn’t thought it would be very impolite for me, to put succulent desserts at the engagement party in which her family, will be present. Can you imagine what they are going to think of me?” She finished in a dramatic voice.

  “I understand.”

  “I called you to find out if you know anyone who makes diet desserts. I’ve searched like a mad woman around the city, but there's not a bakery with that specialty.”

  “Well, the truth is, I do
not know anyone who has those types of cakes ready for... wait a minute. Lucy, don’t hang up.” I lowered my cell phone asking Holly, “Do you still have the delicious recipes you invented? Dietary desserts?

  She nodded, a look of doubt crossing her face.

  “You're in luck, my dear,” I said to Lucy again. “I have the perfect person to do them for you.” Holly’s eyes widened. E-mail me everything and I’ll send you a quote. Just remember it will cost you a little extra due to the short notification.

  “I do not care, Jen, you're a dear. I'll send you all the information right now. Thanks so very much. “

  “A kiss, my dear.”

  I hung up the call.

  “Holly, let's make ourselves millionaires! How had she not thought of this before?”

  I sipped of my hot chocolate.

  “Aunt Jen, don’t leave us in the dark,” Claire said, “tell us what this is about.”

  I explained Lucy's problem to them.

  “She'll send me a list of the things she wants and how much for you to bake,” I said to Holly.

  “Me?” She said, bringing her hand to her chest. “Jen, I'm working with S & C Bakery now, I can’t give up that job.”

  “I'm not telling you to quit your job, I'm telling you to do both.”

  “What time? I have a schedule to meet!”

  “Not this week, Holly. S & C is going to be closed for a couple of weeks” —I checked, during Holly’s test a water pipe had burst and it was not going to be easy to repair. “On top of that, there was the matter of the kitchen equipment they had to replace due to the damage caused by the flood.”

  “Mom, it's a super opportunity,” Claire said excitedly, “you do realize it? You could be famous by making dietary desserts and open your own business.”

  Holly sighed. I knew she was terrified, but I also knew my friend was strong and capable of making thousands of desserts on her own.

  “Let's take it one step at a time,” she said seriously. “First let's wait until you know how many sweets I’ll need to make. For that you don’t only need the ingredients, but also, an appropriate team and professional help, because depending on the quantity, I wouldn’t be satisfied. So let's take it one thing at a time.”

  Yes, Holly was terrified, but willing to try.

  ***