“You want Kate to live with you?” Stephen asks to clarify.
“I didn’t stutter. If you want to come with me to pick her up, you can,” I offer.
“No, I’ll just see her at your house when she gets settled in,” he says like the coward pussy he is.
The door opens again and I hear bags rustle. Josh starts to walk in, but he stops when he sees Stephen is in my office.
“I’m sorry. I’ll come back when your meeting is over,” he says.
“Stephen was just leaving,” I tell him.
“I was? Uh, yeah, I have work to do,” he says, then stands and leaves my office with his tail tucked between his legs.
Right, he has work to do. Stephen pretends to have an important job at the company, but that’s only because I make it seem like he has an important job at the company. All the employees think we have equal roles. If only they knew what kind of man Stephen is. He doesn’t do one thing that’s worthwhile. Stephen is a puppet and I’m his puppet master.
Josh comes in and I hear him set the bags on the desk. I smelled it the second he walked into my office. He went to Plate, one of my favorite lunch spots. They, like Joss, are into healthy, organic cooking. I can smell the Mediterranean Ahi tuna wrap and my mouth waters for it. I honestly don’t know why Josh is so good to me. I treat him like shit, but he’s one hundred percent loyal to me. Josh takes my food out of the bag and sets it in front of me.
Josh takes his seat in the chair across from me and we eat in silence. There’s too much running through my mind, Sebastien, Stephen, the company, Kate, and Joss. My life is complicated, but when did complicated become overwhelming. I thrive on a challenge. I face them head on. I tackle them and make them my bitch. Sebastien, Stephen, and the company, I can handle, but Kate she’s such an unknown. She’s not a child anymore, I can’t control her. I’m only five years older than she is, but since the accident, she’s only ever listened to me. I can’t ground her to her room and order her to snap the fuck out of it.
Joss, made me feel things I’ve never felt before. She’s made me do things I’ve never done before. Things I told myself would never happen. Things I swore I would never allow myself to feel. She put her hand on my heart and when she took it away, it left a cut. It was a small cut, but it was big enough to let in things that aren’t allowed. They aren’t allowed for her own protection. I will not do to her what my father did to my mother.
“River.”
I will not destroy the spirit of a good woman. I will not make her hate me for the things that I have to do. I will never make her look down at the ground in silence as I speak to her, because I’ve broken her spirit to fight. I will not smother her challenging spirit, because I don’t have the time or energy to devote to her and the things that make her radiant.
“River.”
I will not watch, day after day, as the light drains from her eyes when I’m not home for dinner the twentieth consecutive day in a row. I will not watch her plaster on a fake, happy, mechanical smile when I order her to host a business dinner at our home. I will not listen to her silent tears lying next to me when I crawl into bed from work at two in the morning. I will not roll over in the middle of the night and grab a wet, tear stained pillow from her cold, empty side of the bed because she’s gone to sleep on the couch. I will not be that little boy sitting outside the bathroom door as she sits on the opposite side on the floor quietly crying. I will not miss my son’s basketball game or wonder where that trophy came from sitting on the mantle.
“RIVER!”
“What!” I shout and pound my fists on my desk as I stand, then I grab the corner of the desk and violently shove it forward.
“You’re sweating,” Josh’s calm voice breaks me out of my thoughts.
“Joss hasn’t showed up two weeks in a row, fire her,” I order, and then toss my food in the trash under my desk.
“But…” Josh starts.
“Do it!” I roar.
I’ve been sicker than a dog for the last two weeks. In those two weeks, I’ve been to see the doctor five times, and one of those times was to have them administer IV fluids because I was so dehydrated. I swear I’ve never been so sick in my life. The cold that I came down with ended up turning into walking pneumonia. The coughing was bad enough itself, but the severe headaches were to the point I wanted to stab myself in the skull with an ice pick. The antibiotics have run their course, and today is the first day I feel like a human being again. I’m so thankful Nina didn’t catch it from me! The business would have been down completely. She’s been running around like a chicken with her head cut off trying to manage the website and take as many of my clients as she can.
We brought our go-to, part time catering employee, Maddy, in, and she’s accepted our offer to become our first official full time employee. California Chef is now a business of three full time employees! I’ve handed off a few of my chef clients to her permanently, and she’s been working out beautifully.
It’s Monday morning and Nina and I are sitting at our two-person desk looking at the mountain of paperwork that’s piled up. I’m flipping through receipts and files wishing I could scoop it all up and take it outside to the fire pit.
“Uh oh,” Nina says, looking at her computer screen.
“What?” I ask.
“River Mason just sent us an email and the subject line says, urgent,” she says, as the front doorbell rings.
“I’ll get it,” I say, and get up from my chair.
It’s probably Maddy. She’s been coming to the house every morning for a little powwow meeting with Nina, and then she loads my catering van and heads out to her clients. We should just give her a key and tell her to come in and make herself at home.
We’ve decided that Maddy will use Nina’s catering van, since Nina will be staying home in the office from now on. I’m so glad to be getting back to work and to get my van back all to myself. Maddy worked extra late yesterday to get all of her clients as well as my clients done, so she took my catering van home and left her car here.
Maddy’s catering van will still stay in our garage when she’s not using it, but today we’re presenting her with her very own special key. Maddy has a passion for photography. She’s been showing us shots of some of the food she’s been prepping at client’s houses, and Nina’s even been spotlighting them on our website. Her photos could rival the photos you see in food magazines; she’s that good at it. Nina found this awesome keychain with a camera on it. We put Nina’s spare van key on it and we can’t wait to give it to her this morning.
I open the front door with a big smile on my face, but it quickly falls as I look at a tearful Maddy.
“Honey, what’s wrong?” I ask, pulling her into the house.
“You guys are going to fire me,” she says, crying.
Nina quickly comes out of the office into the family room when she hears Maddy crying.
“What’s going on? Maddy, are you alright?” Nina asks.
“Please don’t fire me. I absolutely love this job, and I love the two of you like you were my sisters. You two and this job are the best things to happen to me since I was three,” she says.
Note to self, find out exactly what she means by that once this crisis is averted. Second note to self, give this girl a hug every time I see her.
“Alright, come sit down for a second. Tell us what’s going on,” Nina says, guiding her over to our couch.
Maddy takes a deep breath, and then wipes tears from her cheeks. She looks at me, and then she looks at Nina. She looks back at me and a single tear streaks down her cheek.
“I hit a mailbox when I left my last client’s house last night. I dented your van Joss, I’m so sorry,” she says, then buries her face in her hands.
I look at Nina real quick, and then my heart sinks knowing my baby is dented. But then I look at Maddy, and honestly, it’s all completely fine. As long as Maddy didn’t get hurt, everything is fine. The van can be fixed, that’s what we have insurance for
.
“I know I don’t have any right to ask this, but can I please work the next two weeks, so I can try and find another job. I’m so sorry about your van, Joss. I’ll pay for it, I promise. It may take me ten years to pay you guys back, but I promise, I’ll pay you back,” she says, looking from Nina to me.
“We’re not going to fire you, Maddy,” Nina tells her.
“I’m so sorry. Please, I need at least the two weeks. I’ll lose my apartment if I can’t line up another job first. I’ll do my hardest to look…”
“Maddy, we’re not going to fire you,” I interrupt her.
“What?” she says, in a tiny, squeaky voice.
“You’re not fired. In fact, these are for you,” I tell her, and dig out the key from my pocket to Nina’s van on the kickass, camera keychain.
Her eyes instantly fill with fresh tears as she looks at the keychain with the van key on it.
“In fact,” I say, as I get up and head to the junk drawer in the kitchen. I take out a spare key to our house and slide it onto the split ring of the keychain as I walk back over to the couch, then I hold out the keys for her take. “When you get here in the mornings, just let yourself in. We’ll have a little business meeting, then we can help each other load our vans, then we’re off for the day,” I say.
She lunges off her seat into Nina’s lap with a huge hug that I’m sure took the breath right out of Nina. She stands up, taking Nina with her and puts my neck in a vice grip hug.
“You two are the best,” she says, crying again.
Nina and I go outside to take a look at my van. It’s honestly not that bad at all and I don’t even think we’ll get our insurance company involved. The vans are both a few years old now, and a little dent isn’t that big of a deal.
We have our little meeting, then Maddy and I load our vans. Nina heads back into the office as we leave for our personal chef clients.
It feels so good to be back behind the wheel, although my first client is River. I half expected River to fire me the second after I left his building two weeks ago. I haven’t heard a word from him. It’s all for the best, he’s a busy man and I’m not interested in dating. I can’t say it doesn’t sting a little…who am I kidding it stings a lot. I’m not the sleep around kind of person. I don’t just have random sex and move on. I don’t even understand how people can do that.
I pull up in his driveway and I’m surprised there isn’t a car sitting in his driveway like usual. I park, get out, and open the back of the van and take out his catering bags. I walk up to the door and ring the bell. There’s no answer. I set the heavy bags down and knock. Still, there’s no answer. I knock a little louder and look around. There’s still no answer. I dig my cell phone out and look to see if I missed a call from either him or Josh rescheduling. Nothing. Nina did say she got an email saying urgent. I wonder if they needed to reschedule last minute. I sigh to myself and wonder just what I should do. I already have all his food in my bags. It’s my first day back from being sick and I can’t be late for my remaining three clients today.
Then an idea hits me. I still have a key to his house. The one Josh gave me the first day I cooked, the one with the heavy Mason Group keychain on it. Do I still have it? What did I do with it? I leave the bags by the front door and run back to my van. I grab my purse and dump its contents on the seat. Sure enough, his house key falls out with a big thud on top of the rest of my contents. I smile, grab the key, and then let myself into his house.
The second I’m in his house, I notice a change. I’m not sure what it is, but something is different. I set my bags on the counter and look in his refrigerator. It’s full of unusual food. This isn’t the type of food I know River likes to eat. I wonder if he’s seeing someone. Oh my God, did he move someone into his house? I quickly close the fridge, tell myself to mind my own business and get busy making his meals. I sure don’t want to be here when he or his new woman show up. He didn’t fill out his meals for the week, so I just picked the ones I knew he would like from his history.
After all his meals are made, packaged, and stored in the refrigerator I clean up. But before I go, I need to take one look outside at the beautiful beach.
It’s just so peaceful. Out of the corner of my eye just off the deck, I notice a bunch of moving boxes sitting on the patio off the pool. I can’t help but feel a little hurt that he’s moved on so quickly. I know sleeping with someone once doesn’t bind them in any sort of instant relationship, but I honestly thought I felt something different in River. I guess not, he’s already moved on to his next concubine, as the tabloids call it.
I glance at the beach one last time, then walk out his front door. I lock the door, get in my van and head to my next client’s house. I haven’t seen Mrs. Davis in two weeks and I miss her crazy stories. I feel guilty for not stopping in town and picking up her favorite tea, but deep down, I just can’t bring myself to go near Mason Group.
“We should get going,” Josh says, standing in my doorway.
Today we make the two hour drive to pick up Kate. I’m not sure what to expect this time. This is the first time she’s done serious treatment. This is also the first time she’s coming to live with me again since we were kids.
Kate was always my dad’s favorite. She was only five when they died, but in those five years, she managed to wrap herself around my dad’s little finger. In his eyes, she could do no wrong. Kate was daddy’s little girl and Stephen was his pride and joy. Stephen was always the first word out of my father’s mouth when he talked about family to his clients at our house. Stephen was the starting quarterback, Stephen was in all the advanced classes, Stephen, was on the path to go to an Ivy League college. Stephen was his golden child. Even through all that, Stephen hated my father. We both did. Kate didn’t understand yet to hate him like we did. The only thing Stephen and I had in common was that we hated our father. I still don’t understand why I was the one groomed to take over the business and not Stephen. Oh, Stephen has his role, which he can’t seem to do, but it was me who was molded to become the picture perfect clone of my father.
I get in the passenger seat and try to push out the unwanted memories. If Kate doesn’t agree to move in with me, I’m prepared to play hardball with her. I had Sebastien draw up conservatorship paperwork. If she doesn’t agree on her own, she’ll have no choice. Because of her history, it wasn’t difficult to get a judge to sign the papers. All I have to do is file them with the court and Kate will have no other choice. All her decisions will be made by me. I was serious when I said I wasn’t going to lose another family member.
Since she went in six months ago, we’ve been having weekly phone conversations. In the beginning, they were difficult. She usually didn’t say more than two sentences to me. She’s never discussed anything that went on during her treatment. I made the trip once to see her on family day, but after that, she said it was too hard on her and she asked me not to come again. That hurt, and I still wonder if I should have let her have her way. Maybe it would have made moving in with me easier if I had played a bigger part in her recovery.
I’ll never forget the day I got the call from her roommate saying that Kate was lying on the floor unresponsive in their apartment in a pool of vomit. Josh broke every speeding law the short drive to her apartment. I’ll never forget the smell of vomit when I walked in. But what I never expected to smell again was the smell of death. I smelled it when I was ten and it was there in that room ready to consume Kate. I desperately yelled out her name, but she didn’t respond because she was unconscious on the floor. I fell to the floor when I slid in her vomit in my rush to get to her. I crawled on my hands and knees and frantically felt my way to her lifeless body on the floor. Josh called for an ambulance as I scooped her frail body up and held her tight. I’m not sure she even knew I was there, or that I held her hand the entire ambulance ride to the hospital, but I was. I didn’t know what she had done or what she had taken, but I sure as hell wasn’t ready to bury another family member.
After they stabilized Kate, Josh drove me home numb and covered in dried vomit. I knew it was time for some tough love. It was time to do what was needed before I found myself in a funeral home picking out yet another coffin, but this one for my baby sister.
The car slows down as Josh turns into the parking lot of the rehab facility. We park the car and start to make the short walk to the front door.
“She’s waiting outside by the door,” Josh whispers, as we walk up the walkway.
“How does she look?” I ask.
The last time I saw my sister with my own eyes was right before I passed out. After seeing my mother’s dead eyes, I needed to see if Kate was all right. I fought the urge to pass out as hard as I could. I needed to know if Kate was dead, too. I looked into my five-year-old sister’s terrified eyes, and saw with relief that she had only a small cut above her left eyebrow. Only then did I allow myself to give in and pass out like my body demanded. But, I never again got to see my sister with my own eyes. I’ve never seen the woman that she’s grown up to become.
“She looks really well,” he replies.
“River,” she squeals, as she throws her arms around my neck and gives me a hug.
It’s a pleasant surprise and I’m beyond relieved.
As we enter the building, she threads her fingers through mine. The black heart that I have softens a fraction of a millimeter. Josh squeezes my elbow before he lets go and lets Kate guide me. Since I was the one who admitted her, there is discharge paperwork that I need to fill out. As I sit in the administrator’s office listening to her go over Kate’s release instructions, I’m floored. She’s on a special diet consisting of natural, healthy, organic foods that mirror the guidelines I practice for myself. I wish I hadn’t sent Josh out to stock up the refrigerator and the cupboards with all of Kate’s comfort foods. I thought it would help make the transition into my home a little easier for her. There is also a strict exercise regimen and mandatory counseling sessions with a private psychologist, along with weekly home inspections.
I See...Love (A Different Road #1) Page 10
