Broken in Twilight

by Kim ten Tusscher

  Nigesanla looked around the room. Her eyes were searching her father’s, but he was in conversation with the man next to him. Instead, she looked at Ghalatea. There was the same pain in her eyes as during the conversation they’d had earlier. She sat up straight.

  “From what I’ve heard about the first queen, I understand that she was a remarkable woman. It’s sad that she had to die.” She laid a hand on Yvar’s arm. “I’ll do my utmost to be as good a queen as she was. I know that it’s a difficult task, but I’ll give it my all.”

  “You don’t have to be like her. That’s not possible. You give me things that she couldn’t.” Yvar addressed the man who had spoken about Caliste. “It’s nice to know that Caliste hasn’t been forgotten, but I think it’s inappropriate to talk about her today. Today is about me and my fiancée.”

  Ghalatea stared at Nigesanla’s stomach. It hadn’t escaped her that Nigesanla was resting her hand protectively on her belly.

  She snapped out of her thoughts and saw Nigesanla looking at her again. Ghalatea nodded. Determined, the young woman continued with the tea ceremony. She poured out a glass, but immediately returned the contents to better mix the flavours. She put aside the used glass. Then she poured out the other glasses. She held the kettle as high above the glasses as she could. Ghalatea held her breath, but Nigesanla managed to fill all glasses without spilling. Finally, she poured out the used glass. This one was meant for herself, so she held the spout against the edge of her glass, giving expression to her humility.

  Everyone raised their glass. As one, they said: “The first glass, as bitter as loneliness.”

  They all sipped the tea in silence. Now and again, the silence was broken by hums of approval. When they had all put their glasses down on the table, Nigesanla started with the second round.

  “Now that war has been averted, there’s no need for you to get married any more,” one of the merchants said. It was Sybrenne’s father who had long hoped that Yvar would marry his daughter.

  Nigesanla loudly put the lid on the kettle. Yvar took a deep breath. “Neither is there any reason to not go ahead with this. Merzia is celebrating Zuzeca’s victory over Kasimirh. Merzia will also celebrate because she has gained a new queen. We owe this family extremely much.”

  Zuzeca smiled. “Maybe the king should consider the perks of my lifestyle. It would mean that he can marry my daughter as well as yours, esteemed merchant.”

  Ghalatea felt a shiver run down her spine. She hated having to serve that man again. Nigesanla had clearly inherited her lack of respect for maidservants from her father.

  It hadn’t escaped Ghalatea that there was a Purified man in Zuzeca’s retinue. He apparently hadn’t managed to find a bride, but he had found someone to show the world that he accepted Purified people as equals. Zuzeca even treated the man with respect. Ghalatea looked at Rogan. She was glad that he was her husband instead of that pontifex.

  Nigesanla had finished all actions and poured out the glasses a second time. When she wanted to pour out her own glass, Yvar moved forwards. He pushed Nigesanla’s hand higher. She couldn’t prevent a few drops of tea from spilling on her hand. Ghalatea clasped her hand to her mouth. She only just managed to suppress a shocked sigh.

  Nigesanla gave the king a grateful look. She bowed her head. “Thank you for your recognition.”

  As everybody raised their second glass, they all spoke another proverb. The ritual was repeated a third time. Hands shaking, Nigesanla poured out all the glasses, except for her own. She handed Yvar the kettle. The king rose to his feet. He poured out the glass from a great height. He hadn’t done it that way with Caliste.

  To Ghalatea’s surprise he didn’t spill a drop until, at the end, he moved his hand to the right. A splash of tea ended up next to the glass. Some of the men laughed. By pouring the tea from so great a height, Yvar showed that he held Nigesanla in high esteem. By making a mistake, he wiped out Nigesanla’s disgrace for spilling a few drops. Not everyone appreciated the gesture, however. Some of the men showed their disapproval by shaking their heads. Nigesanla didn’t notice. She picked up the two glasses and rose to her feet. She curtsied and handed one of the glasses to the king.

  “The third glass, as strong as love!”

  Yvar kissed Nigesanla on the cheek. Then he took another sip. “You’ll have to admit that this is the best tea that has been served in this palace for a long time.”

  There was a murmur of assent.

  27

  Yvar and his retinue entered the temple. The priests of all Gods were assembled here today. The room was full of people who didn’t want to miss the royal wedding. Behind the pillars, even more people gathered. They were packed tight to make room for the people entering the temple through the side doors. A silence fell over the crowd.

  The wedding was the climax of the celebrations that had kept Nadesh occupied the past week. The news that Zuzeca had captured Kasimirh had been the reason for the festivities. Yvar still found it hard to believe that the war had been averted. Nevertheless, it was a huge relief.

  Yvar turned around at the altar. It took a long time before Nigesanla appeared in the doorway. At long last, Ghalatea rushed into the temple. The bells started ringing, and the king’s future wife entered the temple. In accordance with Merzian customs, Zuzeca accompanied her. A sigh of admiration went through the temple. Smiling, Nigesanla straightened her shoulders and walked on.

  Yvar was struck by her beauty. Her hair looked like a piece of art with the golden strands Ghalatea had plaited into it. Nigesanla wasn’t wearing a white dress because of the possible association with Margal. She wore a light-blue gown, trimmed with golden embroidery and ornamentations. Her skirts rustled with every step. A dark-blue stone set in a gold pendant hung around her neck. It was the only piece of jewellery she was wearing and it was all she needed.

  Yvar decided to meet her halfway. Nigesanla started to glow even more. They were standing still in the middle of the temple, and Yvar kissed her hand.

  “You look gorgeous.”

  She made a small curtsy. Yvar took her hand from her father.

  “I owe you so much, Zuzeca. The security of my kingdom and this beautiful woman.”

  Zuzeca smiled. “It all turned out better than we had hoped.”

  Without looking at Nigesanla, he turned around and took up his place between his wives.

  Yvar escorted his fiancée down the isle and they faced the priests.

  “If you’d follow me?” Gaia’s priest beckoned them as he walked to the door of the temple’s inner sanctum.

  This was the moment Yvar had been dreading. Nigesanla and he would enter the Sanctuary to undergo a ritual. Most grooms were nervous at this point, because they didn’t know what to expect. Yvar had already been through this with Caliste.

  Nigesanla entered the room first. The priest escorted them to a bed. Nigesanla looked at him, eyes wide. She had clearly picked up on his nerves.

  “It’s all right Nigesanla, you’ll be fine.”

  Yvar kept his distance. The priest picked up a pendulum and held it over Nigesanla’s stomach.

  “Gaia, tell us whether this woman is fertile.”

  The pendulum started to swing. Yvar had a flashback to how Caliste had lain there. The priest had remained silent before asking the question a second time. The pendulum hadn’t answered. Caliste had been inconsolable, but Yvar had found comfort in the thought that the ritual didn’t mean anything. What predictive powers could a piece of metal have? Unfortunately, the pendulum had been right. Caliste hadn’t given him any children.

  Yvar suddenly realized that this time the pendulum remained silent again. It moved here and there. It was as if it was trying to say both yes and no. Nigesanla looked at Yvar for answers. The priest looked at him as well.

  Disappointed, Yvar stared at the door. What if history was to repeat itself? What if the pendulum gave an inconclusive answer? Or worse, predicted that their marriage would remain childless? Was he going to g
o through with the ceremony? He could still back out. He could leave the Sanctuary and remain a bachelor. After all, there was no reason to rush into marriage any more.

  Yvar wanted to run away from the Sanctuary, but instead he looked at Nigesanla. “Maybe we should ask Gaia a different question,” she whispered. Her eyes begged him to calm down and think.

  And then he understood. Yvar walked up to the bed. He grabbed Nigesanla’s hand. She nodded. “Ask Gaia if Nigesanla is already pregnant.”

  Surprise showed in the priests eyes. Then he asked the question. The pendulum moved back and forth in a straight line. The priest nodded slowly.

  Yvar sunk to his knees. He was going to be a father. Nigesanla sat up and wrapped her arms around him. He felt her tears run down his neck.

  “You’ve made me so happy today, Nigesanla.” She nodded, unable to speak. Yvar held her face in his hands and kissed away her tears. “We’re going to have a baby.”

  Nigesanla grabbed his hand and brought it to her stomach. Inside, his heir was growing. He looked at his wife to be. Her face was glowing. So proud, so beautiful.

  She had done what he had asked. She had come to him before their marriage, because she knew that she was fertile. The war had still been looming over them and Nigesanla had understood that otherwise there might not have been any time left to try for a baby. That’s why he loved her. She was more than the good mother he had thought she would be.

  “You’re the perfect wife for me,” he whispered. “You put Merzia’s needs first, like I do.”

  “Thank you, lord.”

  He helped her off the bed. Hand in hand, they left the Sanctuary.

  Three priests joined them at the altar. Of course, one of them was Gunnan’s priest. He was the God of Love, after all. But the priests of Felcita, Goddess of Prosperity, and Wardan, God of Protection, had their role in a wedding as well.

  Two plates were standing on the altar. Felcita’s priest laid some herbs on the plate in front of Nigesanla. Then he nodded.

  Nigesanla picked up a note. She unfolded it and scanned its contents. She had written it herself, and it seemed as if she wanted to make clear that she agreed with the words.

  “Lord Yvar, with Felcita as my witness, I promise to make you happy in every way. I pray to the Goddess to help me know what it is you wish from me, and try my best to fulfil your wishes.” As Nigesanla looked at Yvar, her expression was solemn. Her eyes, however, still shone brightly because of the news that Gaia had given them.

  Yvar nodded at her. Nigesanla’s words confirmed what he already knew. No hollow words fit for the occasion, but conviction behind every word she spoke.

  “It fills me with happiness to have the honour to make you this promise today.”

  Smiling, she laid the note on the plate. Her eyes searched her father, who was sitting in the front row.

  The priest said, “Felcita, I ask You to hear this prayer. Bless this couple with ultimate happiness in their marriage.”

  She has already done so, priest. Yvar smiled.

  “Let this be an unbreakable bond between the king and his wife.”

  The priest held a flame to the note, turning it into ashes together with the herbs. He picked up a gold bottle decorated with filigree. He poured the ashes into the bottle and sealed it with the sign of the Goddess.

  Nigesanla took the bottle from the priest and held it by its chain. Yvar knelt slightly so she could hang it around his neck.

  “Thank you, Nigesanla. I’m convinced that we’ll be happy together.”

  Nigesanla nodded. Her hand caressed her stomach.

  Wardan’s priest now laid herbs on the second plate. Yvar added the note that he had written the night before.

  “Nigesanla, today I promise to protect you. Our marriage will give you a home. Because of this ceremony, no one can hurt you or ignore you. I will keep you and our family safe under all circumstances. May Wardan be my support and witness.”

  The priest said a prayer to Wardan as he ignited the contents of the dish. These ashes were poured into a bottle as well. Yvar kissed the bottle and hung it around Nigesanla’s neck.

  “Thank you, lord.”

  Gunnan’s priest was next. He held out his hands and asked the bride and groom to put their hands in his.

  “Gunnan, bless this union with love.”

  Nigesanla looked up at Yvar. He winked. A tear slid down her fiery red cheeks.

  The priest went on and used a ribbon to tie Yvar’s wrist to Nigesanla’s. “Love binds these two lives together. It’s a force that cannot be broken as long as it’s blessed with Gunnan’s approval. Today, you will experience what this means. This ribbon may not be broken before midnight, and only then will this marriage be legitimate. Up until that time, either one of you can break the bond.”

  He tied the ribbon in a bow.

  Yvar entwined Nigesanla’s hand in his. “Make it a double knot,” he said. “I don’t want it to come loose prematurely.”

  A soldier gestured for Kasimirh to get into line. Others were allowed into the Great Hall without questions, but everybody wearing a veil had to pass two soldiers who had been Purified themselves. Kasimirh wasn’t too worried, as long as Ferhdessar wasn’t around, nobody would recognize him. His scar wasn’t the exact same as the scars of Purified people, but nobody was going to question him about it, because it was an extremely sensitive subject.

  Kasimirh undid his veil and lifted it like the Purified people around him did. The soldier quickly glanced at his scar, almost ashamed for having to do it. Then he nodded.

  Once inside the Hall, Kasimirh stood still. He briefly glanced at the dome. The beautiful stained-glass window threw colourful patches of light on the guests. It didn’t cheer him up. He was annoyed that there were too many people in the room. This could sabotage his plans. If someone were to accidentally get in the way of the magic that was meant for the king, the element of surprise would be wasted. Yvar would be rushed off into safety, and there wouldn’t be a second chance for Kasimirh.

  This was exactly why he hadn’t tried anything at the temple, which had been his original plan. He hadn’t been able to find a right spot in time, and during the service the priests had been blocking the king from his line of sight. He had come close to attacking anyway, but he had managed to restrain himself. He’d been waiting for so long, that he could wait a few hours longer.

  Kasimirh walked along the walls and got himself a glass of wine. From here, he could see the platform that Yvar was sitting on reasonably well. Notable Merzians were allowed entrance one by one to the area that was secured by the Royal Guard. The common Merzians were kept at a distance of at least ten paces.

  To his annoyance, Kasimirh realized that today he was still one of the common people. He forcefully put his glass down on the table. The stem broke and the remainder of wine left a red stain on the white damask. One of the servants gave him a look of surprise. At the same time, Kasimirh was pushed aside by someone trying to get a drink.

  “It’s way too crowded here,” Kasimirh muttered to himself, as he turned around and looked at the platform again.

  Nigesanla was of course seated next to the king. She was glowing with pride and Kasimirh noticed the resemblance with Tokala. Perhaps they had the same mother.

  During the preparations for this day, Kasimirh had briefly considered sending Tokala to kill the king. Being the brother of the bride, he would be able to get much closer to the bride and groom. Kasimirh, however, hadn’t been convinced that Tokala could pull it off: killing his sister’s husband. Especially when she was looking as happy as she did today. Not even if Jakob commanded him to.

  So, he had decided to do it himself. The fact that he was Zuzeca’s servant should have given him plenty of access as well. Unfortunately, Yvar had decreed that only his own servants would be working during the celebrations.

  Kasimirh tried to repress his anger. All he could do was look for another way to get close to the king. He only needed an unobstructed vi
ew for a second. That shouldn’t be impossible.

  From the corner of his eye he spotted a veiled servant getting onto the platform. Yvar handed him his glass and the servant filled it with wine. He bowed and walked on past Nigesanla and Zuzeca.

  Kasimirh turned around and made way for the exit. He had to fight his way through the throng of people flocking into the Great Hall. Some people cursed at him, but Kasimirh ignored them. There was a plan taking shape in his head.

  He searched his way through the empty corridors of the palace. Everyone was allowed to come here, so he didn’t arouse suspicion in the few people he did meet. At a crossing he bumped into someone.

  Bloody veil.

  Because of the headscarf, Kasimirh could only see what was right in front him. He hadn’t seen the person coming from the other hallway. Aggravated, Kasimirh looked at the man, only to quickly look away. Grudgingly, he bowed and whispered an apology. It was Ferhdessar! Kasimirh gathered some magic. He could eliminate the sorcerer right here and now. One problem less to worry about.

  Ferhdessar stopped in front of him, waiting for some other people to catch up. Kasimirh saw their legs, but also the swords hanging from their belts. This was not the right time to attack Ferhdessar.

  “Let us through.”

  “Certainly, lord sorcerer.” Head bent, Kasimirh walked to the wall. Ferhdessar took a few steps before he turned around. Kasimirh’s heart was in his throat. Had he recognized his voice?

  “Lord Ferhdessar, they’re waiting for us.”

  “Yes, you’re right.”

  Kasimirh heaved a sigh of relief when Ferhdessar and the soldiers walked on. He sat down on the windowsill to catch his breath. He realized that it was fortunate that he had run into Ferhdessar here. It meant that the sorcerer was no longer on the platform protecting the king.

  Kasimirh got up and walked into the hallway that Ferhdessar had come from. There were more people here. There was a room where servants walked back and forth with serving trays. Kasimirh quickened his pace and walked past them. A bit further down was the entrance to the Great Hall. Kasimirh hid in an alcove and weaved the structure of the wall around himself as a shield to make himself less visible. He was waiting for the servant with the veil to walk by.