Some Kind of Normal

by Juliana Stone

  Huh.

  I thought of Baker’s Landing, but aside from the fact that it was out of town and would take nearly an hour to get to on foot, I didn’t think she’d go there. That was my place.

  It was then that a lightbulb went off and I crossed the street at a slow jog, ignoring the hoots from a passing car full of girls. I didn’t stop until I finally saw the old mill, and by then, my knee was throbbing.

  It hadn’t been used as long as I’d been alive and probably for a long time before that. With shingles missing from the roof, chipped white paint, and broken windows that looked like large gaping wounds, the mill wasn’t exactly postcard material. But if Everly was looking to disappear for a few hours every day, I could see why she’d pick this place, because who else in their right mind would hang out here?

  I picked my way up the steps, careful to avoid the loose boards and the ones that were missing. The main door was locked, which was a joke really, considering the windows were broken. I looked inside, but it was dark and I couldn’t see much, so I walked around to the far end of the building and continued out back.

  And that’s when I found her.

  This part of the old mill faced the river, with the dam a few hundred yards away and the brush that clung to the riverbed giving her privacy. Everly had her earbuds in, so she didn’t know I was there. I took my time and let my eyes roll over a whole lot more of Everly than I’d seen before. I can’t lie—the view from where I stood was smokin’.

  Her long hair was tied up loosely on top of her head, and she was on her stomach, feet up in the air, moving to the beat of whatever song she was listening to, reading a book.

  My mouth was a little dry, and I thought to myself that lime green was my new favorite color. Especially when it was paired with a skimpy bikini, one that showed Everly’s curves off in a way that made my chest tighten and my heart speed up.

  Her skin was golden, and every time her legs bobbed, muscles moved. She was all smooth lines and smooth skin and a bikini bottom that showed a lot. I cleared my throat, but it didn’t do anything.

  Earbuds. Shit. I didn’t want to scare her, but I couldn’t spend the next two hours staring at a half-naked girl. (Well, I probably could but could and should don’t exactly mean the same thing.) I took a step closer and then came up short when I realized her top was undone. All that smooth skin and no tan lines.

  Okay, the little lime green bikini was one thing, but when a guy is presented with a beautiful half-naked girl, sometimes it’s hard for him to keep his thoughts on the straight and narrow, if you get my drift.

  I took a step back, wincing and swearing at the shooting pain in my knee. I’m not sure if it was the swearing or maybe she was just suddenly aware that she was no longer alone, but Everly glanced over her shoulder, hands across her chest, and for a second, our eyes connected in such a way that I felt it like a physical touch.

  Keep your eyes above her shoulders.

  I repeated those words more than a few times, because we were both kind of frozen. She was surprised, and I was unsure how to proceed without coming across as a pervert.

  With one hand she slowly took out her earbuds, the other still holding her top in place.

  “Hey,” I managed to say.

  Wow. Lame approach.

  “You look hot,” Everly replied, eyes sliding away when the grin I couldn’t help opened up nice and wide.

  “Thanks.”

  “I meant that…”

  “I know.” I glanced down at my bare chest, slick with sweat.

  “How did you know I was here?”

  “I remembered you mentioning this place a few weeks back when we were at Baker’s Landing.”

  Her eyes were on me again, and damn if my heart didn’t kick it up a notch. Man, if this kept up, I’d pass out, and it wouldn’t be from heatstroke. What was it about this girl that touched me? The unanswered questions? Was that it? Was she a challenge? Or was it the way her eyes reflected deeper and darker things? Things that maybe I recognized.

  My gaze dropped to her bare back. Or was it all that smooth, naked skin? The lime green bikini? Because, first off, I was dying to touch her, and second, I was, after all, a seventeen-year-old guy who hadn’t been with a girl in months. Not since Bailey.

  Maybe that’s what all this was. Maybe I just needed to get laid.

  As soon as that thought hit me, I gave myself a mental shake. What the hell? This was Everly. Who was I kidding? This here, whatever it was that I had with her, was so much more than hooking up with some girl. If all I wanted was a quick lay, I could have gotten that Friday night. Jess had made it clear that she was totally into the idea of the two of us getting physical.

  Everly moved a bit and nodded at the space beside her. She didn’t say anything, and I walked over.

  “Could you?” she asked, her voice so quiet and low it took a few moments to sink in.

  I swallowed, eyes glued to all that smooth bare skin. Man up, Lewis, I told myself.

  Gingerly, I reached for her and grasped the two thin pieces of her bikini top together. And totally reverted to ninth grade when Melissa Byers let me touch her boobs. I was all thumbs, trying to tie the stupid thing together. Seriously, my youngest cousin could tie his shoes faster than what I was doing.

  My knuckles grazed her skin—accidentally, I swear—the Sanskrit symbol taunting me as I looked down.

  Strength.

  Yeah. I was going to need a lot of it.

  She shifted and her hip pushed into me.

  Man. And then some.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Everly

  I think a part of me expected Trevor to eventually show up, because as much as I was startled to see him standing behind me, it wasn’t because I was surprised. It was because he was half-naked. Half-naked with skin that shone from heat and sweat.

  I dragged my eyes away, but not so fast that I didn’t notice a few things.

  A scar on his right side that was jagged.

  Abs that would make most athletes drool in envy.

  Abs that would make most girls drool, period.

  A thin line of hair that drifted from his belly button and disappeared beneath the top of his shorts.

  Shorts that maybe he should hike up because they were dangerously low on his hips.

  That indent guys get, you know, the one that girls talk about. The one that makes you think of things that you shouldn’t be thinking about. It was there. Front and center. Taunting me.

  So, yeah, I dragged my eyes away but still managed to take him all in. And now he was sitting beside me. And my skin tingled where he’d touched my back. And I was nervous because we were both practically naked and I’d never been this close to a guy before without, you know, clothes on.

  Ugh. I felt my cheeks get hot as I thought of him tying up my bikini top. But there’d been no way for me to get the job done without things peeking out that shouldn’t be peeking out.

  I sighed and pushed my sunglasses back over my eyes. How had I reached the age of seventeen without getting half-naked with a guy before?

  Oh. Right. There’d been no Trevor Lewis up until a few weeks ago. No guy who’d ever tempted me the way he did. No guy who could make me forget. And right now, I was all about forgetting if I could.

  I closed the book I’d been trying to read for the last hour and stretched out on the blanket, resting my chin on my arms. Trevor did the same, both of us looking out over the water, watching the birds that flew and dove for fish near the dam.

  “I used to jump off the railway tracks just above the dam with Nate and Link,” Trevor said after a few moments. “When I was, like, twelve. Man, we got in a lot of trouble when our parents found out. Especially after Daryl drowned.”

  I thought about that kid. “Daryl Mason?” I asked.

  Trevor nodded and turned onto his side so
that he was looking at me and not the water. “We were supposed to meet him that afternoon, but Nate had a family thing. I got into trouble for something, can’t remember what, and Link just never showed. There was an undertow or maybe he got caught on something under the dam. I don’t remember how he drowned. I just know he did.” Trevor’s eyes widened a bit. “I haven’t been back to the dam since.”

  “He went to my church,” I offered, not knowing what else to say. At the time it had been a tragedy the entire town felt. His parents owned the hardware store, but after Daryl died, they’d moved away.

  “I know. His funeral was the last time I was inside a church. It was just hard, you know? We were young, stupid, and so…relieved it wasn’t us. Seeing how broken up his parents were was awful. I remember his mom kept saying, ‘He’s gone to heaven now. I’ll see him again.’ But all I kept thinking was how do you know? How do you know life doesn’t just end when we do?”

  I considered his words. “My dad would say that’s what faith is for.”

  My dad would say a lot of things, and now I wondered if my dad believed all the stuff he preached, considering the lie he’d been living.

  Trevor reached over and plucked my sunglasses off the end of my nose. I wished he hadn’t because now he could see the tears that sat in the corners. Tears that had haunted me since Sunday. Tears that had been falling on and off since forever, it seemed.

  “Are you okay?” he asked. Three simple words, and yet so much meaning filled the cracks between them. He cared about me. I heard it in his voice. Most guys would have been up in my face, angry with the silent treatment I’d been doling out since Sunday. Wondering how I could let them touch me, kiss me, and then…nothing.

  But not Trevor, and for that I was grateful. I was way too fragile right now to deal with anger.

  “Everly? Did I do something?” He looked so serious. And more than a little unsure. “I mean, did I push you in a way that I shouldn’t have Friday?”

  That thing in my chest tightened again. The thing that was somehow connected to this boy.

  “No.” I shook my head. “No, Trevor. Friday was…amazing. This…” Would I ever be able to speak normally again? “The way I’ve been acting has nothing to do with you. I don’t want you to think that.”

  God, his eyes were beautiful. A girl could lose herself inside them.

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  I wanted to tell him everything. I wanted to so badly. But I couldn’t vocalize the things in my head. Not yet anyway. Maybe never.

  “I’m sorry I blew you off,” I said instead. “I didn’t mean to. I just didn’t know how to be with anyone.”

  “At the moment you seem to be doing all right.” His voice was light, touched with the slightest bit of something. It was that something that I needed, because I felt like I’d been holding my breath since Sunday and finally I was able to breathe a bit easier.

  “I suppose you think that you have something to do with that?”

  “That would make me an egotistical bastard, don’t you think?”

  “Yeah. It would.”

  “Then I guess I’m an egotistical bastard.” There was that smile again. “Because I think it has everything to do with me.”

  I found myself smiling in return, and I nudged him with my shoulder. “You’re pretty full of yourself, Trevor Lewis.”

  He didn’t answer because his eyes were on my mouth.

  And suddenly the air between us got heavy. Or maybe I couldn’t breathe because I was too busy hanging on to this moment, thinking that Trevor had the longest lashes I’d ever seen on a guy. That his sweat-slicked skin was so different from mine, taut over muscle and somehow stronger.

  I saw his tattoo, the one along the side of his neck, and I couldn’t help myself. I traced it with my forefinger, following the strange pattern until it crept up over his shoulder.

  I moved closer to him, loving how the sun reflected in his beautiful eyes. I think he groaned. Or maybe it was me.

  Either way, that sound tugged at something hot and heavy inside me, and I pushed him back, sliding up along his body until I was on top of him. His hands moved up over my hips, pressing in on my lower back before gliding up to my waist, where he held me so that I couldn’t move.

  Not that I wanted to.

  In a world that had felt wrong for so many days, everything about being here with Trevor felt right.

  We were both breathing heavily and hadn’t done anything yet. Not really. But I felt his heart beating beneath my chest, and my fingers dug into the hair at his nape.

  “Kiss me,” I whispered, closing my eyes when I heard the need in my voice and hoping he didn’t.

  His hands moved up, slowly, fingers on skin sending little shock waves through my body. He cupped the back of my head, brought me closer, and then his mouth slid across mine. If ever there was a little piece of heaven on earth, it was somehow tied up inside Trevor Lewis.

  The kiss was fire and heat and pulsing pleasure. I’d never been kissed like that before. If I thought Friday night was amazing, this here, right now, blew that out of the water.

  Sure, it could be because he had no shirt on and I was practically naked. It could have been because every single inch of me was pressed against him. It could have been the sun shining down on us, warming already heated skin. Or it could have been the call of the birds as they flew over the dam, making us feel alive.

  It could have been all of those things that made me squirm and want to get so close to Trevor that I was willing to do things I’d never contemplated with anyone else.

  But it was more than that.

  I kissed him fiercely, wanting him to feel what was inside me. Wondering what it would feel like to have him inside me.

  He finally pulled away and smoothed a long piece of my hair back from my face and tucked it behind my ear. He shuddered and pulled me in close, so close that his heart sounded as if it was going to beat right out of his chest.

  I knew that this was something more than just a summer fling. A hookup.

  I thought of what Hales had told me only a week ago.

  Do you believe in love at first sight?

  Was that what this was? Love? The beginning of love? Was it possible that I was falling in love with Trevor Lewis? Or was this just plain old lust?

  Startled, I moved slightly because I needed to see his eyes. Needed to see what was there.

  Needed to see if I’d recognize whatever it was.

  “Hey,” he said gruffly, hands still in my hair, though his expression was kind of pained. “I’m not kissing you again.”

  Okay. That’s not what I’d been expecting to hear.

  “Why?” I asked without thinking.

  He attempted a smile. “This might be the ego talking, but I’m pretty sure that if I kiss you again…”

  He shifted a bit, and suddenly I was aware that his body had changed. That things might not be so easy for him, you know, being a guy and all.

  This was the moment where I could have said Screw you, universe. I’m going to do what feels good and right and…

  “What if I want you to kiss me again?” I asked, watching him closely.

  We both knew that I wasn’t talking about just a kiss.

  “Right here? Right now?” he answered. “That’s what you want?”

  We stared at each other for a long time, and then I shuddered, letting him pull me back into a hug.

  “We’ve got all summer,” he said, voice a little rough. “To figure things out.”

  “Thanks,” I murmured.

  He kissed the top of my head. “For what?”

  “For not thinking I’m a total freak. For not being pissed at the way I’ve been acting since Sunday, and for coming out here to find me.”

  “You might not thank me when you find out the diabolical reason I c
ame looking for you.”

  “Diabolical. That sounds serious.”

  “Dinner at my house can be a pretty serious thing, though that usually depends on Taylor’s mood, and since she’s still grounded, it’s not looking great. But,” he said, arching his back slightly so that I could see him, “my mom’s famous fajitas?”

  That was pretty much all it took. That and the fact that I wanted to float in this boy’s orbit for as long as I could. Trevor Lewis was exactly what I needed.

  “Fajitas sound perfect.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  Trevor

  “She’s a nice girl.”

  “She’s…yeah.”

  I waited a beat and watched Everly wave from her porch, and then when she disappeared inside her house, I exhaled loudly. I’d been wound tighter than Link’s snare drum ever since she’d climbed on top of me out at the dam.

  I’d had to sit across from her at the dinner table when what I really wanted to do was jump over the stupid thing and kiss her until she made those sexy noises again. It was hard, trying to maintain some kind of control.

  “Yeah,” I said again, turning to my dad. “She’s nice.”

  Wow. That didn’t sound anything like what I really thought, but I hadn’t talked girls with Dad in a while, and this particular one had kind of thrown me for a loop.

  “Nice,” Dad repeated.

  I shrugged.

  His face split wide open in a grin as he put the Mustang in reverse. “Nice,” he said again with a laugh.

  “Well, what do you want me to say?”

  “You guys dating?”

  Were we? I glanced in the mirror and watched her house disappear from view.

  “We’re hanging out.”

  “Huh. Serious hanging out or just hanging out?”

  “I’m not sure yet,” I replied honestly.

  “Well, you just make sure you’re careful is all.”

  “Got it covered, Dad.”

  He glanced at me sharply. “You guys having sex?”