Fighting the Stars

by Jessica Killabrew

  “I’m just a kid, though.”

  “You are, but you are also my first choice. It’s going to be hard work. You’ll have to help your mom every day, do your work, eat your vegetables. Do you think you can handle that?”

  He nodded his head eagerly. “Yeah, but I don’t like vegetables.”

  Rena sighed. “We’ll have to work on that.”

  She stood up and looked over at her sister who was wiping tears from her eyes. She didn’t want to fall apart right now. “Ready for me to show you where you’ll be staying?”

  “Yes, and thank you again, Rena. You didn’t have to come for us.” Tena reached for her hand. It was the first physical contact she had had with her sister in years.

  Rena squeezed her sister’s hand. “I should have come sooner.”

  Rena walked with them through the corridors of the ship. They took the lift up to the floor where she had made arrangements for her sister to stay. It wasn’t the biggest room on board but it did have two bedrooms and a small living space.

  When they got off the lift, she stopped in front of the door and opened it for them. “I can move you to something larger in a few days, when some of our VIPs leave.”

  “This is more than enough for us, Rena.”

  She was going to say something else, but she heard a male voice behind her.

  “I was told you would be here. I need to talk to you immediately, in private.” Turk said, stopping next to her. He froze at seeing Tena standing in the doorway across from Rena.

  “Turk, you remember my sister, don’t you?”

  “Tena, it’s been a while.”

  Tena looked between Turk and Rena with alarm and confusion. “Yes, it has. Rena is taking me and my son to live with my mother.”

  “Your son?”

  “Why don’t you both come inside and let me see if there is food I can fix all of us.”

  Rena couldn’t take one more moment of seeing them together. “Let me know if you need something.” She turned to leave.

  “Rena!” Her sister called out but she refused to turn back. It was too much too soon.

  “Rena! Wait, I still need to talk to you,” Turk called out as he caught up to her.

  She turned. “What is it? What did you find?”

  “Let’s go somewhere private so that no one else overhears.” He spoke quietly, and nodded in reference to the people who were passing by them.

  “Fine, we can go to my quarters.” She entered the lift and pushed the button to two floors up. They didn’t say anything to each other as they left the lift and went down to her quarters at the end of the corridor. She pressed her hand on the keypad and opened the door.

  The moment he stepped into her space, she knew it was a mistake inviting him there. This was her personal retreat. She never invited anyone here. Now she would have his image in her place, haunting her.

  “Make this quick. I have to meet with some of my crew members about a schedule change.”

  “I questioned the nurses at the medical station. The main door was broken into but someone had the code to open the inner door where the drugs were stored. The person also knew where the surveillance cameras were located.”

  “Inside job then. Do you have any evidence pointing to the culprit?”

  “Not yet, but I will.”

  She nodded. “I guess Drako sending you here wasn’t completely ridiculous.”

  “I had some training early on with GPO training before I decided I wanted to be a galactic pilot.”

  “I forgot about that. So, you have your own ship. Is it everything you thought it would be?”

  “It was everything I thought I wanted, but I have learned that it’s not what I truly want. I guess when I lost you, everything changed, including my goals in life.”

  She snorted. “You got everything you set out for, a ship of your own and all the women you could ever want.”

  “There has only ever been one woman I wanted, only one that could fill me with joy.”

  She felt her heart racing as he looked at her intently. She couldn’t be here with him. She stood up quickly and walked to the door. “I think you should get back to your investigation.”

  He stopped in front of her and put his hand up to block the door from opening. He blocked her in. Her back was pressed against the door.

  “Turk…”

  “You are so fucking beautiful it hurts to look at you.”

  She would have denied that but he lifted his hand up to gently caress her cheek with his fingers. His touch stole her words from her. Then she felt his thumb stroke her bottom lip and she shivered with need.

  “I think about you all the time, Rena. I miss you, your life and your fire when you would get mad at me. I miss us.”

  She should have pulled away but she couldn’t move. He lowered his head and kissed her. It was short but sweet and had her wanting to open up and give him more of her, but it ended as quickly as it had started. He released her, pulled away, and opened the door.

  “I’ll see you later.”

  She stood there, watching him leave and feeling overwhelmed with many feelings. That’s when she realized she had been holding her breath. She released the air in one huge exhale. That man is dangerous.

  Chapter 6

  Turk knew he shouldn’t have touched her, but he didn’t regret it. One little kiss and she had melted in his arms. She could deny it all she wanted, but that told him everything that he needed to know. She still wanted him. Next time he had her in his arms, he wouldn’t stop kissing her.

  He finished his shift and video-messaged Drako to let him know the latest sabotage.

  “You’ll have to set up your own surveillance to catch the perpetrators. I will send security cameras with your stuff. We’ll have to catch them red-handed. It’s the only thing that will help Rena unless we can get a confession,” Drako told him.

  Turk snorted. “Those two idiots are sabotaging the ship, causing disruptions among the passengers, all to make Rena look ineffective as a captain. They’re going to pay for what they are trying to do.”

  “How is everything else going?”

  “She’s still avoiding me but I managed to get a few words with her in private.” Turk decided not to mention what else had happened in the privacy of Rena’s quarters.

  “That’s your way in then.”

  “There’s another problem I didn’t count on — Tena’s here on the ship.”

  “How the hell did that happen?”

  “I don’t know, but she boarded today with her son.”

  “Shit, man. Don’t let that complicate things. Good luck.”

  “Talk to you later.” He ended the video call and was about to take a shower when he heard someone knock on his door.

  He opened the door and immediately froze in place.

  “Hi, can we come in?” Tena was standing in his doorway, holding her young son in her arms.

  Turk moved out of the way to allow her to enter. He closed the door behind her, feeling like he was making a mistake. The last time he had allowed her into his home they had somehow ended up in bed together and Rena walked in on them. He had lost the love of his life because of that night. Now that he thought there was a chance to be with Rena again, he didn’t want to come close to letting the same thing happen again.

  “I don’t think you should be here, Tena.”

  She set her son down and handed him a bag filled with toys to preoccupy him. She stood up and looked at Turk.

  “I don’t want to be here. I thought about avoiding you while I was on board, but I need to try to fix what I broke all those years ago. I promise this won’t take long. If you just give me a few minutes, I promise you’ll never have to see me again.”

  He sighed. “Sit down.” He looked her over and realized how tired she looked.

  She sat down. “I wanted to tell Rena earlier, but she’s kept herself busy since we’ve arrived. I had to get this off my chest. I am so sorry for what I did to ruin you and Rena’s re
lationship. I’d like to say I thought myself in love with you at the time, but, in truth, I did the whole thing out of spite.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Rena and I were so close when we were little. Then, as we got older, I felt things become different between us. There were especially differences in how our mother treated each of us. Rena was her precious, perfect golden child and I was the other one, the troublemaker. We found out we had different fathers when Rena was in high school and got injured. It turned out my blood type wasn’t a match for her. Our mother confirmed it. Rena’s father was her beloved mate who had died before Rena was born. I was conceived out of a night of loneliness that culminated in a one-night stand. It made sense to me why I was always treated a little differently from Rena. I was angry at my mother and that anger ended up unfairly directed toward Rena.”

  “So you planned to sleep with me to hurt Rena intentionally.”

  She nodded her head. “I was all kinds of messed up, Turk. I had been doing drugs and drinking, and my most recent boyfriend at the time had just left me. I was miserable and wanted to get back at Rena for having such a perfect life.”

  “And I made it easy for you by drinking so much.”

  “I took full advantage of that. It was my low point. After that I checked myself into rehab.”

  “Is that supposed to make up for what you did? You come by to say, ‘Hey, I’m sorry I screwed up your life’?”

  “No, but I need to clear up something.”

  “What’s that?”

  “I need to tell you that we didn’t actually have sex that night.”

  “What?”

  “You were pretty wasted when I came over. I had to help you get to the bed and then you passed out. I undressed you, then I waited until I knew that Rena was on her way home. I just took off my top and left my jeans on and covered us with the blanket. Rena walked in and saw you naked and me partially naked. That’s it.”

  “You ruined our lives!” He didn’t mean to raise his voice. The little boy who had been busy playing suddenly was at his mom’s side.

  “Momma?”

  “It’s okay, baby. Go pack up your toys and we’ll head out to look at the ship some more.”

  “I ruined all our lives. It was the worst moment of my life and knowing that I hurt my sister like that — I even tried to kill myself. It took a few months for me to come to terms with what I had done and by then Rena was already training on a ship. I tried to call her, I tried to call you, but neither of you would have anything to do with me. It was understandable. I had to go through a lot of therapy to come to terms with my actions. I made bad choices in my life. A few years ago, I met someone I thought I could be with for the long term. We married, but he didn’t want to be a family man, so after JJ was born, he left us to fend for ourselves. When the evacuation was called, my mother begged Rena to pick us up and bring us to her. I’m trying to do the right thing now.”

  He didn’t know how to respond. This confession was the one thing that proved him innocent, but would it really repair their relationship? A lot had happened since then and they were different now. He missed who they were before, but that had also been a flawed relationship. He knew he had struggled with a drinking problem back then, and now they both were more caught up in their own careers than ever. No, if he was to be with Rena again, it would have to be a new relationship, one based on their previous experiences as a foundation, but they would have to build a new trust between them so that what they had now would be stronger.

  “For what it’s worth, I saw the way she looked at you earlier. She still cares for you.”

  He hadn’t realized that Tena was at the door with her son by her side. He stood up and opened the door for her. What did he say? Thanks? This woman had ruined his life, but he supposed if he was hoping to be forgiven for his part in those events, he first needed to find a way to forgive others.

  “I hope that you and Rena repair your sisterly bond.”

  “Me too, at least for JJ’s sake. I want him to know his aunt.” She left and he closed the door.

  All he remembered from that night was waking up dazed. He saw Tena next to him half naked, and he would never forget Rena’s stricken face. He had crushed her. That’s when he had finally realized the depth of his problem with alcohol.

  He was in shock. All these years he had thought he slept with Tena, but he hadn’t. The truth was, what if he hadn’t passed out? What if she had come on to him? Would he have responded? He’d like to say no, but he couldn’t be sure of that. It was why drinking had been so destructive for him. It made him more vulnerable to situations like that and he never wanted to be vulnerable like that again.

  He had a decision to make. He could either go straight to Rena immediately and tell her what Tena confessed, or he could try to win her back slowly. Rena may still be attracted to him, but he wanted her heart back. It would take a lot of work, but Rena was worth it. He just wanted time to see if she could open her heart to him.

  *****

  She had come down to Turk’s quarters to have it out with him once and for all, but she had suddenly seen her sister and nephew arrive. She should have left, but she moved to a corner where she was hidden. All kinds of thoughts ran through her mind on what they were doing together. Memories of catching them together played over and over in her mind.

  It hurt to see them together and the fact that Turk didn’t slam the door in her face really bothered her. So many emotions raged inside her that she couldn’t quite get herself under control. Tena seemed sorry for what she had done. Why would she risk angering Rena?

  She had been there for about twenty-five minutes and was about to leave when the door opened again and Tena left with her nephew. Tena and Turk’s clothes looked in place and neither looked flushed from any sexual activity. In fact, both of them looked like they couldn’t stand to be around each other for long. Their mutual discomfort was evident in the way Turk kept his distance and in the way Tena was in a hurry to leave. She sighed with relief when her sister finally walked away. She knew she should go back to her place, but she found herself heading toward Turk’s door.

  She knocked on his door and a second later the door opened to reveal a very surprised Turk.

  “Rena? Was there something that you wanted?”

  What did she want? Acting impulsively, she reached for him and kissed him. It was hot and passionate and over just as quickly as it had started.

  She pulled away, looked into those dark eyes of his, and knew that she had made a mistake. She would never be able to get him out of her mind now.

  “What was that for? Not that I’m complaining. I just thought you hated me.”

  “I don’t hate you.” What was she doing? She was so confused. She started walking down the hallway but turned back to glare at him. “Don’t mess around with my sister.”

  He didn’t say anything as she walked away. She hadn’t acted so impulsively in years. It was scary and excited all at the same time, but it left her feeling extremely confused and vulnerable. Was she acting like this with Turk because she was lonely?

  She went back to her quarters and messaged the liaison, Jesse. She didn’t have many friends on board and he seemed easy to talk to. Jesse messaged back immediately that they could do a preliminary dinner tomorrow evening to discuss his services. It was probably a mistake, but she was entitled to make a few mistakes. She was tired of being what Tena accused her of — perfect. No, she wasn’t perfect, she was like everyone else and made just as many mistakes but that was all part of growing. This date with Jesse was a chance to talk to someone who wouldn’t judge her.

  Chapter 7

  Turk pointlessly watched as Jaken “introduced” him to all the controls of the ship. Turk wished he could tell Jaken that he already knew how to pilot a spaceship but because he was undercover, he couldn’t even give a hint at the fact that he was already experienced with the controls. He tried to act interested, but he was just impatiently wait
ing for Jaken to run an errand or go to lunch so he could set up the surveillance cameras.

  Unfortunately, after introducing all the controls to Turk, Jaken gave him a list of errands to run before they would go to lunch. As he did everything that Jaken wanted him to, he thought of all the places he would put the cameras. He wanted to get them placed today since he was sure that Jaken and Nade were behind everything that was happening. He rushed through the list of things that Jaken had given him, then hurried back to the control room, where Jaken was very impatiently waiting for his return.

  “I’m going to go grab lunch. When everyone else gets back, feel free to go get yours.” He started to leave, but stopped and turned to Turk. “Don’t leave until someone else gets back.”

  Turk nodded, then waited for a few minutes before he started installing the cameras. As he worked, he couldn’t help but to smile at how oblivious Jaken was to everything. Jaken and Nade were too dense to be behind this alone. Either that or they were just really great at pretending, but Rena was at risk, so he couldn’t afford to take any chances. He needed proof. Thankfully, he finished installing all of the cameras without anyone noticing.

  While waiting for Jaken to return, he had the restaurant send up food. After several hours, he came to the conclusion that Jaken wasn’t coming back that evening.

  Turk needed to report to Rena, to let her know that he had installed the cameras. He felt torn about seeing her. He longed to spend time with her, but knew she could be angry or bitter toward him. Things were now complicated with her sister Tena on board. It would bring back painful memories for Rena and the last thing he wanted was for her to feel hurt. He could take her anger but not her pain. It ripped him apart..

  He considered stopping by to talk to Rena, but he decided the timing wasn’t right. He had to stay focused on the reason why he was on this ship. He would help Rena with her issues on this ship, then would work on building a new relationship with her.

  “Yes,” Rena said as she answered the door.