Fall Forever (Fall For Me)

by Marks, Melanie

  CHAPTER 2

  Riley

  When we were in middle school, Zoey had to stand at the front of the class and read a poem that she was supposed to be writing in American Literature. No one else in the class had to do that. It was a punishment from our teacher Mrs. Woodland to Zoey, because Zoey was talking when she was supposed to be writing. Zoey was always talking. But she didn’t do it because she was “bad.” She did it because she had a lot to say. The girl was interesting. And beautiful…. And my best friend’s girlfriend.

  I had slunk down in my seat, half-worried for Zoey, half-intrigued. What would her poem be about? Did she even write one? She’d been talking an awful lot, whispering with her friends, probably about Finn. Definitely not about me. Or, okay, it was possible she was whispering about me. But if she was, it was only to complain that I’d tied her shoelaces together while she and Finn were eating lunch. They hadn’t even noticed I’d done it because they’d been in their own little world—as usual. One that didn’t involve me—or the rest of the school. Just those two—Zoey and Finn—alone in love. It made my heart ache to see them together—let alone, have to hang out with them. Every day. So, I tried not to. Only, Finn was my best friend…. And I was drawn to Zoey. So, yeah, I was sort of sunk.

  After enduring Zoey’s poem, as soon as the bell rang I asked Jade Silver to be my girlfriend. It wasn’t that I liked Jade, though she was pretty. It wasn’t even that Jade was popular, though she was. She was what the girls in our class called “The Queen” of popularity. But the reason I asked her out was I knew it would bother Zoey. And I wanted to bother Zoey—bad. ‘Cause she bothered me.

  She was all I could think about, all I wanted to look at. My eyes would follow her everywhere. Yet, she was always looking at Finn. Smiling at Finn. Talking to Finn. That was why I was able to tie her shoelaces together at lunch—she was in a world that only involved Finn.

  And her poem … the poem made my heart catch. Ache. She had written about being in love. I wanted so bad for that poem to be about me. But I knew who it was about. Finn. She smiled at him after she finished reading it. Her pretty eyes glowing as she gazed at him, like he was her bright, shining angel that gave her breath.

  Then she whispered, “This poem is for my boyfriend, Finn.”

  I winced hearing that. My heart ached. So tortured.

  So, yeah. I asked out Jade, Zoey’s archenemy. ‘Cause Finn had Zoey’s love. All I could hope for was her hate. At least then she would look at me….

  Those were my complicated thoughts back then—in middle school. And they hadn’t changed much in high school.

  Having the girl I wanted so bad I couldn’t breathe—knowing she belonged to my best friend—it ripped me up inside.

  But so did this now—betraying my best friend. Yeah, I knew Finn was messed up—cheating on Zoey. He needed his skull smacked in—bad. But the guy loved Zoey. He did. It was Bianca—all Bianca—her teasing him and tempting him with things he’d never had. (Things he didn’t need, but he was too dumb to know that.)

  But losing Zoey—no way. He couldn’t. He’d die. He was going to plead for her. Beg her to forgive him … and Zoey would. She always did.

  A chill crawled down my spine.

  I traced my lips, pretending I could still feel Zoey’s hot, sexy mouth on mine. Would I ever feel her soft lips again? I was terrified I wouldn’t. And that fear scared the life out of me.

  I shuddered. Man. I’d dug my own grave. I should have never kissed her. I’d made a pact with myself the moment I found out she was Finn’s girl all those years ago: I’d never go there. But the thing was, it was the only place I ever wanted to be.

  CHAPTER 3

  Zoey

  I pressed my shaking hands against my eyes and exhaled slowly. Then finally, I started my car and pulled out of the restaurant’s parking lot. I was shaking. Violently. Not a good thing while driving. Dangerous. Face it, I had no business on the road.

  Of course, I had no business doing what I’d done only a few moments earlier, either—kissing Riley. Talk about dangerous—that was lethal. To my heart. Though I had to admit, for a thrilling, crazy moment I’d been in absolute heaven.

  The memory of Riley’s strong arms around me sent tremors of delight through my body and a jet of warmth to my heart. At the first red light, I rested my head on the steering wheel, letting the glorious memory seep inside me—Riley’s hot, eager lips on mine and his hungry hands tangling in my hair—the memory had me in a happy cloud of delusion—until the light turned green and cars’ horns woke me out of my tantalized reverie.

  Oh yeah, I’m driving. And dumped.

  I turned on to my street.

  My whole body ignited in a fit of violent shivers when I saw Finn’s beat-up blue Honda parked in my driveway. Unspeakable pain shot through me.

  I clutched the steering wheel tighter and tried to breathe, but it caught as I spotted Finn himself sitting on my front steps.

  Seeing him there, my stomach collapsed in on itself.

  He was hunched over his knees with his head in his hands. Obviously, he knew.

  That is—he knew I knew.

  I could tell by his posture. He knew he was busted. And he was sorry. And aching. And miserable.

  All that sorrow and torment I could read from him—just from seeing him sitting there all grief-stricken—but it was all just too bad. And too late.

  Heat and anger from his full-on betrayal stirred inside me, rising far above my pain. Kissing Riley had defused some of my earlier fury, but now—seeing the lying, backstabbing, cheat that had carelessly stomped on my fragile, trusting heart—it all gurgled back up to the surface. Violently. Made me cringe with rage.

  Black spots swam across my vision as I narrowed my eyes, glaring at backstabbing Finn. My hurting, tortured mind could only grasp one scrambling thought. Only one. But it held on to it tight. Screamed it: I’m so done forgiving! I would never, ever do it again. Ever. Not for him. He didn’t deserve it. He had cheated and lied to me—over and over. He destroyed my ability to trust. Seriously. I doubted I could ever fully trust anyone ever again. He took that away from me. Trust.

  He sucked so bad.

  I tightened my grip on the steering wheel, so wanting to run him over. Cheating, lying, dirt-bag!!

  Instead of ramming into him as my fantasies begged, I drove past my house. Just drove right by. Didn’t stop or even slow down. Just silently left him to wallow in his ignorance. ‘Cause, obviously, I wasn’t ready to confront him. (Since all I wanted to do was bash his head in and do other [satisfying] violent acts—talking wasn’t one of them.) I, in fact, never wanted to talk to him again, ever. Seriously. People talk about closure—but I didn’t want that. Didn’t need it. My heart was already closed. Bam! Shut as tight as a vault.

  I had listened to his lies—over and over. Deep down, I’d even known they were lies—yet I’d let him convince me I was being psycho and paranoid. He had let me think that—led me to think that.

  I gritted my teeth. I actually hated him now. Truly. Hated. Him.

  CHAPTER 4

  I drove around my small beach town, shaking and having nowhere to go. Nowhere to hide and lick my wounds. Finn apparently was staking my house. And Riley had sent me home from work. And well, work and Finn—sadly, those two things had become my entire life.

  So, now—suddenly without them—I was … lost. Adrift.

  I parked at this fast food place near my house to grab a soda and try to stop shaking. But once inside the building, as I stepped into the long ordering line, who should come up beside me? Bianca. Of course. Just to make my nightmare complete.

  She shoved her shoulder hard against mine as she passed me—only she didn’t really pass me. It was like she was going to fake as though it was an “accident”—her simply violently stumbling into me as she was heading to the bathroom or whatever. Only, then—after she shoved me—it was like she decided to ditch the charade and openly make clear she was a full-on witch.

&n
bsp; “Why’d you make Finn quit?” she growled.

  I raised my eyebrows. Not only surprised that Finn had done that—actually quit—but that she sounded so hateful and accusing about it. I mean, I was the girlfriend here. She was only the skanky troll he’d cheated with. She had no right to be angry or make accusations. As far as I was concerned the only thing she was allowed to say—or do—was apologize.

  I smiled at her, like my world was full of rainbows. “I didn’t make Finn quit,” I chirped, sounding surprisingly carefree and tra-la-la. Like Wow, life is awesome! Then I added with a dramatic shrug, “He did mention something though—about working with a skank. I guess he got tired of it.”

  Bianca grabbed my arm as I turned to storm away. She clutched it tight, tight, tight like she had fantasies of breaking it off. That’s when I noticed her eyes and nose were all drippy and red. She’d obviously been crying. (Ha!)

  She narrowed her eyes at me into tiny, hateful slits. “I know you made him quit, Zoey—and that you’re forcing him to stop seeing me. But he won’t. He can’t. He loves me.” She spat, “And you can’t do anything about it.”

  She gave me a smug, evil smile. “He’ll be kissing me again before you can re-latch the chain you had him tied to.”

  “Really?” I stared at her trembling hand that still desperately clutched my arm. “He’s at my house right now, Bianca. He seems to be trying to re-lock the “chain” himself. Why don’t you let go of my arm and go try to give him that kiss you were just talking about?—and take the knife you jabbed into my back with you. It’s annoying.”

  She snatched her hand away from me, looking dismayed. “He’s at your house?”

  Her two friends beside her made I-told-you-so noises. One said, “See, Bianca, that’s why he’s not answering your texts.”

  The pouty look on Bianca’s face amazed me. How could she be so upset that he was at his girlfriend’s house? SKANK!!

  “’Night!” I called to her over my shoulder with a huge fake smile.

  CHAPTER 5

  I ended up spending the night at my best friend, Summer’s house. Well, technically, she was my “best” friend. Had definitely been in middle school. But we hadn’t spent much time together for … well, years, actually.

  So, I think she was shocked to find me at her door. But I had nowhere else to go. Finn was still stalking my house. And I just wasn’t ready for a showdown.

  I drove around and around town with nowhere to go. It was too cold for the beach and I wasn’t up for going somewhere I’d be recognized—where I’d have to put on another fake smile.

  Finally, I just ended up there—at Summer’s.

  But Summer had wrapped her arms around me and brought me into her house. Acted as though all of those years of distance hadn’t happened between us. As though we were still best friends.

  She let me cry and tell her about Finn. And Riley. And she got out a cot and let me sleep in her room—just like middle school when we were best friends and would stay up all night giggling. Though yeah, now the giggling was replaced with tears.

  ***

  “Okay,” Summer said in the morning—well, technically afternoon. I had just put a pillow over my head and planned to sleep the day away, but suddenly, Summer seemed to have other plans for me. She sat at the foot of my cot and bit her lip. “Don’t be mad,” she said.

  My stomach tightened. Uh-oh.

  Whenever Summer said that—“Don’t be mad”—well, it meant I was going to explode. I squeezed the pillow tighter over my head, bracing myself for horrible, horrendous news … and face it, after what I went through yesterday I couldn’t handle much more “horrible” or “horrendous.” I was tapped out. So, I didn’t breathe under the pillow. I just waited with chills crawling up my spine.

  “What Summer?” I moaned when she hesitated. Just needing her to spill. Rip off the news like a band-aid.

  “I texted Riley,” she said. Then she added quickly, “Just to let him know where you are, so he would stop worrying.”

  The knots in my stomach eased a little and I let out my breath. I was glad she did that—sort of. I wasn’t mad at Riley. Well, not exactly. Okay, I was … sort of. But my emotions and thoughts were scrambled and all over the place—about everything. But especially Riley.

  I was mad that he had known about Finn’s cheating—of course—and that he didn’t tell me. And I was mad that he had said I was his girlfriend, then took it back almost immediately. But at the same time, I couldn’t help it. I understood his dilemma. Finn was his best friend. Also, there was the annoying fact I had the memory of his hot, passionate kisses lingering at the back of my brain (well, not that far back).

  And not only that—(ugh!)—I had dreamed about him last night. Dreamed about our mackin’. That tantalizing, hot passion still clung to the sleepy cobwebs in my brain, making it so when I thought about him all I could do was dreamily sigh. And pant.

  “Here’s the thing,” Summer said hastily. “Riley just texted me back … and some things went down last night.” She grimaced. “Some really bad things.”

  My stomach tightened as she emphasized, “Really, really bad things.”

  CHAPTER 6

  Okay, breathe.

  Turns out last night when Finn couldn’t get a hold of me, he went to Riley’s. They got in a huge fight.

  When Finn found out that Riley and I had kissed, he went crazy and took a swing at Riley. They got into a huge, massive brawl. Apparently, as they were duking it out, they were both yelling about how much they “love” me.

  Summer gave me a guilty/excited smile when she saw me blanch at that. I mean, I was practically hyperventilating from the tragic, horrible story. But Summer is a romantic, so she wanted me to see the up-side to the fight. I guess.

  “Zoey, two hot guys were fighting over you—clamoring about how much they love you.” She nudged me playfully. “Girls live for stuff like that—dream about it.”

  She raised her eyebrows. “The fight’s on the web.” She gave me a devilish smile. “Wanna to see?”

  I clutched my churning stomach and groaned, “The web??!! No!!! Really?!”

  A chill ran down my spine just thinking about it—the two best friends in the entire world in a fistfight. Because of me. And the whole, entire world could witness it.

  Groan, groan, groan!

  Summer gave me a sympathetic smile, but she also gave a little laugh. “Oh, yeah, Zoey.” She raised her eyebrows matter-of-factly. “It’s all over the web—like everywhere.”

  She laughed again. “They were making such a scene—I mean, a fist fight! In the Heights. Over a girl. Of course they drew a huge crowd, and of course it was recorded on everyone’s cell phones and posted everywhere. Nina Martin sent it to the whole school—you probably have a copy of it on your phone—if you’d turn the stupid thing on.”

  I wiped away a tear (they just kept sneaking out every now and then).

  “I didn’t want to hear from Finn,” I explained, though of course I didn’t need to. Summer got it. She was a beautiful cheerleader. She’d broken up with tons of guys.

  Summer did a little shudder. “I get why you don’t want to see Finn right now. In the video he’s a complete psycho basket-case.”

  She clicked on her phone. “I’m only going to show you a tiny part of their fight—okay? Because it gets really violent and ugly. And scary. But this part—aww!” She patted her heart. “This part will make you melt—if you can ignore all the punching and kicking, I mean.”

  She handed me her cell phone and hit play.

  As they were throwing punches, Finn accused Riley of “coming between” us. And Riley accused Finn of not deserving me. As he had Finn in a headlock he growled, “A free pass, man? Who does that? Someone that has no idea what he’s got. But I do, Finn. I love Zoey. Man, I always have.”

  Hearing his earnest, heart-warming words, my stomach suddenly felt like it was full of butterflies. But at the same time, it was full of grinding, churning rocks as wel
l. Because seeing that—those two fight—best friends—over me. It killed. I swear, everything inside me died. There was no way I could live with that kind of guilt. No way.

  Summer quickly shut off the recording. “It—uh, goes downhill really quick from there. But not about you, Zoey—you’re their ‘Angel’ all the way through it.”

  She cringed. “Just, you know, those two used-to-be-best friends clobbering each other—it’s sad.”

  No kidding. I wrapped my arms around my stomach feeling sick.

  Summer stretched out on the cot, then did another little grimace like she just thought of something even more unpleasant than that fight. “You should probably let me check through your phone messages before you look at your texts. There’s probably some you just don’t want to see—ever. Like from Ava. I hear she’s on a rampage ever since she viewed Riley and Finn’s fight. I mean, face it, you know the girl would throw a fit knowing two boys were fighting over a girl that wasn’t her—any boys. But this is Riley. Fighting over you.”

  Summer bit her lip before she went on, like giving me a chance to digest Ava is a vengeful witch, or maybe just weighing her next words carefully. Not really sure cause I couldn’t really concentrate on what she was telling me. Finn and Riley’s fight haunted my brain. It was all I could see—that total nightmare fight. It would never leave my brain. Ever.

  Summer went on hesitantly, “Ava’s saying stuff like you “lured” Riley away from her and had your “hooks” in him since middle school.” Summer gave a little ironic laugh. “Which I guess you did—whether you knew it or not. Apparently you’d had Riley hook-line-and-sinker the moment he laid eyes on you.”