Addict

by Lexi Blake

  The demon who had taken Neil Roberts was the same one who had betrayed the king and caused the death of my father.

  “He killed my father.” The words came out of my mouth in a dull, almost dumb tone, as though I needed to say them for it to be real. “Matthew killed my father.”

  “I believe I warned the queen about it at the time,” Jacob offered.

  Gray shook his head. “No. He wouldn’t do that.”

  “If your brother is Nemcox, then I assure you his betrayal led to the death of Lee Owens,” Dev swore. “He took Neil against his will and raped him on the Hell plane for years.”

  “It is true.” Jacob put a hand on Gray’s shoulder.

  The queen turned to Gray. She wasn’t a woman who was too proud to beg for a friend. “Please, Mr. Sloane. Please, if you have any power at all with him, don’t let him kill my husband. Please don’t let him take Neil again. He almost didn’t survive the first time.”

  “But he’s my brother.” Gray had a blank look in his eyes.

  He’d lost everyone. Again. His father had sent him in as a sacrificial lamb and now he’d learned the truth about the one person who seemed to put him first.

  “Gray, you are not defined by your family.” I know I should have railed at him. His brother was the reason my father no longer walked the Earth plane, but Gray wasn’t Matthew or Nemcox or whoever he called himself. Choices. Jacob had told me we got to choose who we are. We choose every day, and I needed Gray to choose to be strong. I looked him straight in the eyes. “If your brother killed my father, I still care about you.”

  I couldn’t tell him I loved him. Not with Marcus here. It was so fucked up and jumbled in my head, but I needed him to know his brother’s crimes weren’t a stain on his soul.

  His hands squeezed mine and he turned sad eyes to the queen. “My brother won’t listen to me. I’m so sorry.”

  Down below, Nemcox was holding the sword in his hand and Winter was talking about the coming demon swarm. He went on and on about some kind of new fucking demon day, and I wouldn’t have been surprised if the asshole broke into song.

  I was concentrating on something else while the demon monologued.

  “Please tell me what to do,” I begged Gray.

  The king was on his knees, waiting for the swing of a sword that would end his life and save his son’s.

  Gray’s eyes rolled and became pure white orbs.

  Jacob watched in obvious wonder. “The prophet is truly born. Do you know how long it’s been since I had kindred, child? It is a good day.”

  “Celebrate by helping him figure out what I should do.” It was bitchy, but I was on a time line. Winter, it seemed, was finishing up his “I’m the shit” speech and they were going to get down to some serious king killing.

  And only demonkind could kill an elemental.

  Gray’s head rolled forward. “One changed can be change. Blood of the demon runs through the veins of the righteous. The war is on her. Instinct shall lead the Hunter and she alone will decide the battle.”

  His eyes cleared and I stared at him.

  Yeah, this was probably a really meaningful moment for him. His first true prophecy. He’d stared into the storm and come back with the answer. And he sounded like a flipping apocalyptic poet. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

  He frowned. “I told you what to do.”

  Jacob’s grin was about a mile wide. “It made perfect sense to him. It’s part of our nature. When it’s truly important, the answer comes to him in this fashion. Nothing comes easy, child. He told you what to do in the way of a prophet.” Jacob nodded Gray’s way. “I see many ways this could go, but only one stands out.”

  “Because she will always choose to be brave,” Gray said.

  I turned. It was on me. One changed can be change. I’d been changed. Only demonkind could kill an elemental.

  Maybe not demonkind, but at least I had a hand. I would decide the battle.

  Oh, I knew what my decision was.

  “Dev, I can’t watch it. Please. Please.” The queen pleaded with her husband or whoever could help her.

  I was betting when she’d woken up this morning, she hadn’t thought that she would be bargaining with God for her husband and her son.

  “Your Highness, it’s going to be all right.” I was surprised at how calm I was now that I had some amount of certainty that I would control the outcome. Live or die, I kind of wanted the control.

  It would be all right. Gray had seen it. All I had to do was be brave. Make the right choice. Not the safe one.

  I was born to hunt demons, and Fate or our father or God or whatever you want to call that benevolent power in the universe that watched over us had sent me on that turn that ended with me not getting the wolf hand I’d been promised.

  It ending with me having the tools I needed to save one little boy and his father.

  The queen looked at me, her eyes pleading for a moment, and then she calmed. She nodded and took a long breath. “Do what you need to do.”

  Marcus reached for my hand. “She needs to prepare herself.”

  Yeah, I did need to do that. I let the wolf in. She and I worked together now, and the good news was we both hated assholes who used children as shields.

  The queen’s lips turned up. “Yes, those are your father’s eyes, Kelsey.”

  “Shit, that’s actually kind of scary,” Quinn said.

  They could talk all they liked. I moved away from Marcus because he would try to stop me. I placed my foot on the second rung on the railing and let the adrenaline take over. I would get one shot and only one. I had two people to save because Lee really required two fathers. Three for good measure. He was hard to handle and I wasn’t going to let the kid down.

  It flashed over me, the warmth that came when my arm changed. It sizzled along me and some people might call it pain. I liked the sensation. The burn meant I was stronger than I’d been before. More capable. A little more unhinged.

  I was going to need that.

  Matthew glanced up at his brother with almost sad eyes.

  I no longer gave a shit. He could love his brother all he liked, but he was an evil son of a bitch and if he’d really killed my father, then I would have another demon to hunt.

  “Long live the king,” I yelled to get Donovan’s attention. I held up one hand. The right hand. The one I was going to use to murder his enemy.

  Donovan’s eyes flared briefly and I knew he’d gotten my message.

  “Do it!” Winter yelled.

  The minute the blade started to move, I did, too. I pushed myself off to the third rung and leapt, never taking my eyes off the demon.

  He did exactly what I thought he would. He let go of Lee as the blade swung for Donovan’s neck. The contract worked both ways. It ensured there would be no betrayal from Winter. He wouldn’t wait until Donovan was down a head and then freeze Lee. Demons take contracts seriously, so I had an in. He relaxed, sure of the outcome. All eyes were on the king, who leaned back at precisely the right moment to avoid his head being cut from his body.

  I had eyed my target perfectly. I landed right on top of Winter, who roared my way, but it didn’t matter because my demon hand knew where it wanted to go. I shoved it into his chest cavity as Lee screamed and scrambled back. I didn’t think twice about him. His dad would move heaven and earth to keep him safe.

  Winter’s eyes widened when he fell back, my weight on top of him.

  I made a fist and pulled my hand out with my prize. His withered and wintery heart.

  Abbas Hiberna was no more.

  Donovan stood, his son in his arms, and the minute he turned toward Matthew, the body he was occupying fell to the ground and the demons around us fled.

  Ether was quiet.

  “Dad? Did you see that? Kelsey pulled out that dude’s heart. It was so cool,” Lee was saying. “Can I see it?”

  I dropped the heart. I’ve found whenever I’m forced to pull someone’s heart out that I
’m almost overwhelmed by the instinct to lift it over my head in victory, but it feels weird when children are watching.

  Donovan set his son down on his bare feet, his head drooping. I was pretty sure if he hadn’t had all that keep-him-young vampire DNA, he would have gone gray right then and there. “Lee, we’re going to have a serious talk about you and bedtime.”

  The queen and Quinn were running down the stairs.

  Lee stared up at his father, eyes wide. “I don’t suppose we could celebrate the fact that I’m alive, huh, Dad?”

  “You are the most grounded child in the history of all time.” Donovan said before pulling his child close. There were tears in his eyes when he looked back at me. Thank you, he mouthed.

  I didn’t need thanks. I needed the knowledge that they were alive.

  I glanced up at the landing above me and Gray was staring down. He stared at the body of the human his brother had been occupying. He seemed so hollow, his eyes blank. He hadn’t known the truth. He hadn’t known his brother had been the one to lead my father to his death.

  “You are getting a raise.” The queen fell to her knees beside her husband, but her eyes were on me. “Whatever the hell you want, you get.”

  I kind of didn’t need the money, but a little goodwill might help me out. I’d been a bitch when I first got here, and now I kind of liked it and wanted to stay. “Actually, my assistant could use fifteen percent more. I’m afraid I made him think I’d killed his girlfriend, and he’s going to need some serious therapy.”

  “Done,” Quinn said as he too surrounded their boy.

  Marcus ran down the stairs and threw his arms around me, not minding the fact that I was covered in the blood of our enemy. “Bella, that was the single bravest thing I’ve ever seen. I can’t believe you did that.”

  His peace, his happiness with me flowed over my soul and I was eased. No matter what the prophet had shown me, I needed Marcus now. I held on to him even as Gray moved down the stairs.

  I saw Jamie running in, smiling my way.

  Marcus held me tight. “Forgive me, bella. I’ve been too cynical, too afraid of losing you.”

  I let myself sigh and sink into his warmth. His joy seeped into me.

  I needed Marcus for now.

  And yet, I stared over his shoulder, watching Gray the entire time.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  I knocked on the door to the hotel room, knowing damn well who the current resident was.

  It took him a moment. A few really. I stood out in the hallway like an idiot before knocking again.

  “Gray, I know you’re in there.”

  Three days had passed since Abbas Hiberna had attempted his coup. The wolves had been spared thanks to Gray and a couple of halflings who donated blood Henri had mixed with the king’s. They were all healed, though Trent had claimed he’d never been in any actual danger and Quinn had fired too soon. Like I was buying that.

  Ether was getting back to normal, but the kids were in lockdown and Donovan was currently reevaluating most of his political decisions concerning the demons.

  With the exception of one.

  He wouldn’t be moved on the demon he called Stewart or Nemcox.

  I was going to have to kill Gray’s brother.

  Gray had disappeared shortly after his blood donation, and Jacob had shown up on my doorstep this morning asking me to find him. I was fairly certain the prophet knew where he was and had an agenda sending me out, but I already missed Gray, so I went to the one place I knew he would be.

  Gray opened the door. He was wearing a pair of pajama bottoms and nothing else. His dragon tat glowed, and I could have sworn it winked my way. “What do you want, Kelsey?”

  So he was in a good mood. I didn’t let it get me down. I smiled at the dragon and resisted the urge to reach out and touch it. So tempting. I’ve come to believe that tat is the pure demon portion of Gray and it’s not evil. Like Jacob said—we make the choice. The dragon is neither good nor evil, but animated by the choices Gray makes every single day. So it wouldn’t be wrong to lean over and kiss the damn thing.

  “Jacob’s been looking for you.” It was better than saying I’d missed him.

  Gray opened the door wider and allowed me in. “Then Jacob should have come for me himself.”

  I entered the room that was so all-fired important to the rest of my life. It was a nice suite, done in earthy tones and with very elegant furnishings. It bespoke of a wealth I would never have, though Quinn had mentioned riches for saving his boy.

  I’d turned him down. I did that stuff for fun.

  And love. I was kind of learning that saving the people I loved was the ultimate rush.

  “So this is the famous room.” I stopped in the middle and took it in. It was the way I’d seen it, though I’ll admit the recollections weren’t exactly perfectly clear. It felt like the right room. This was the room where my life would truly be decided.

  “I can’t see it anymore.” Gray sat down on the couch. “I can see everything but my own future. During the transition, I got threads of it, but now it’s all unclear.”

  “Jacob told me it would be hard to see your own future. It would hurt.”

  “It gives me a migraine that hurts like a motherfucker and still I try. I was happy here.”

  Longing filled me. I couldn’t see their faces now, but I knew my children existed on some potential plane. “I was, too.”

  “Not always.” Gray’s head dropped forward. “Kelsey, I’ve done you a grave disservice.”

  “We’re all alive. I think we’re good. Though you should know I plan on spanking that Bellamy bastard.” The billionaire with the extra-planar tech had gone underground. Like he wouldn’t pop up again—and when he did, I would give him something he wouldn’t forget. On any plane.

  I didn’t mention the fact that I meant to kill Gray’s brother.

  Gray’s head came up. “I saw enough during my transition to know how things could go for you. Kelsey, please believe me. I never meant to hurt you.”

  I sat down beside him. When I’d left today, I’d told Marcus I was looking for Gray. I didn’t want to lie to my lover. I’d spent more than forty-eight hours with Marcus beside me or inside me and holding me. He’d driven all my stress out, but it was coming back because of this discussion with Gray. “I know that. Gray, I told you I don’t blame you. You’re not your family. No one believes that more than I do. I was raised by a man who hated me. I came here to ask you to come back to Ether with me. The king wants to open talks.”

  “The king sent you?”

  “Actually, everyone sent me. The king asked me to bring you back. Jacob wanted me to find you. Quinn and the queen would like to thank you. I know your biological family turned out to be crappy, but that’s not the only family we get. We can choose. Jamie would really like it if you came home.”

  “Jamie would?”

  He was pressing me and I caved. “I want you to come home, Gray.”

  “I don’t think I have a home.”

  Had he listened to a word I said? “All you have to do is choose.”

  He shook his head and turned to me, violet eyes darkening. “I always choose you, Kelsey. You’re my home, but I don’t think that’s what’s best for you anymore.”

  “It’s not our time, but I’m starting to believe that there will be a time for us. Gray, I still love you. I never stopped. I love Marcus, too. I don’t know how or why or if any of it lasts, but I’m going to take all the honest love I can get in this world.” I might have to choose one day. Between my love for Marcus and his needs. She was out there. That woman Marcus would die for existed and she wasn’t the queen’s toddler. I’d felt her. Would I love him enough to let him go?

  We sat on the couch for a long moment, space between us. Our shared history was there, a massive wall that kept me from reaching out to him.

  “I’m going to go with Jacob, Kelsey.”

  Tears sparked in my eyes, but I held them back. I’d expe
cted he would need some time to deal with the whole prophet thing. “Will you call me when you come back?”

  “I don’t know if I will come back.” He sighed and the afternoon sunlight made his skin glow. He was beautiful and so far from me. “I remember thinking most roads led to you here alone. I saw it over and over again. You crying on the floor, desperate and alone because I’m going to Hell.”

  “That was one possible future, Gray.”

  “No, many choices lead to that future. It’s most probable. I won’t put you through that. Marcus can make you happy.” His jaw tightened. “Apparently that wolf can make you happy.”

  Jealousy looked cute on him. “What we saw were possibilities. The game’s not over. Not until the minute they drag you to Hell, and even then it’s not done. We don’t know what comes after that moment. You said I’ll always choose to be brave. Well, if you get dragged to Hell, you should know I’ll be mounting a damn rescue party after I finish my well-deserved cry.”

  He reached out and his fingertips brushed my face. “And that’s why I have to stay away from you.”

  “You say you’re going to stay away, but you’re here. You came back to this place. You’ll always come back to this place, and I think I will, too.”

  “I’m going to try to stay away. I can’t stand the thought of being the reason you don’t find happiness, the reason you die. If I have to spend an eternity serving on the Hell plane, at least I’ll know you’re somewhere happy.” He stood up, a clear signal he was done. “Tell Jacob he can come for me at any time. I’m ready to go. I’ve spoken with both my father and brother and explained that if either of them attempt to contact me again, I’ll offer my services to Lucifer on one condition.”

  I could guess what that was. “Their heads.”

  “Oh, yes. The word is Lucifer wasn’t happy with Winter’s plans. He’s a patient man, though. He hasn’t punished my father yet. I can tip that scale if I want to.”

  I stood up and moved to face him. “Don’t do anything foolish, Gray. And I’m sorry about your brother.”

  “Another reason for me to leave. I don’t want to watch you kill him. I know what you have to do. I didn’t know about your father. Or Roberts. I was naïve. I thought Nemcox’s mate was happy with him. Yet another idiotic play I’ve made.”