Just Breathe (The Blue Series Book 1)

by Chelle C. Craze

  “Fuck, thanks, wouldn’t want to make a man feel good about his ego or anything. Don’t do me any favors, Cassandra.” His voice escalates, and he drawls out each syllable of my name. He stops walking and tugs me gradually backward, making my back collide with his chest. He traces my shoulder with his nose while tormenting me by lightly dragging his tongue along the base of my neck. My skin trembles with desire beneath his touch, and my mind is set into overdrive.

  I sigh deeply as I begin to count, trying to calm my hormones before I speak. “Lucas, I wasn’t trying to sound like an ass,” I plea with lust in my voice.

  He wraps his arms around my waist. “I know you weren’t, but you’re so easy to mess with,” he whispers, making my skin burn beneath his words.

  “Let me go, you egotistical jerk!” I say playfully. With a hearty laugh, he releases me and follows my lead down the hallway. We find Dar dishing out French toast onto plates with a spatula, humming a soft tune as she works. I inhale the glorious smell of her blueberry-stuffed French toast and bacon. It’s a meal she makes on a regular basis, and I’m not complaining because it’s one of my favorite dishes. “Smells amazing, Dar.” I am eagerly purring, as my mouth waters just thinking about sinking my teeth into the first bite.

  “Well, well, well,” she scoffs while removing her ear buds and stuffing them into her back pocket. “I didn’t know if you all were ever going to come up for air, so I decided to do something productive.” She claps her palms against one another a few times, sending white powder flying from them. “Oh, by the way, Lucas, you’re out of blueberries, bacon, and after this meal, you’ll be out of syrup, too,” she cheerfully announces, turning away from the stove with a huge grin plastered across her face. “For that matter, powdered sugar, too.”

  “Thank you for actually making yourself useful for once.” He laughs as she sticks out her tongue at him in protest. “So, here is the plan for the day. After we eat, I’ll take you all back to your apartment to speak with your landlord so you can get inside. Then, we’ll get your car, and you can do whatever the hell you want, Kid.” Just hearing that nickname sends shivers down my spine. It’s what he called me. Lucas finishes speaking with a reassuring smug look on his face.

  “Oh, you are now?” She makes a face at him, wrinkling up her nose and sticking out her tongue. Lucas mimics her expression, sticking out his tongue in her direction. “You know, Lucas, you really are a self-righteous asshole, but I still love ya. Have you talked to Johnny recently?” Dar fills our plate with food and places each onto the dining room table beside our mugs. Lucas finally releases my hand as we take a seat.

  I don’t hear Lucas’ answer; after this morning, my thoughts are cloudy. I sit in silence and eat while Lucas and Dar talk. If someone would’ve told me what was about to happen when I met Lucas, I wouldn’t have believed them. He continues to be an asshat, just a little less of one. He appears to have been an old soul but a young spirit. He is just an enigma to me. At times, his words are so beautiful they could even make angels envious. Additional times, I think the devil himself is dancing with joy at the sin Lucas offers.

  “Penny for your thoughts, Cricket?” Lucas interjects, causing me to jump slightly.

  “Next question, please.” I smile timidly at Lucas, and he returns my smile. Dar looks at me and shakes her head. I expect her to say a few words that would make me more uncomfortable than I already am, but she doesn’t. Maybe she is a little hungover this morning. Normally, she would go out of her way to embarrass me. A week ago, she placed eggs into one of my bras and set it onto the breakfast bar with a sign beside it that read, “Free for a Nice Family of Birds—The Whole Flock Can Live Here. See Displays for Family Planning.” It took three cycles in the washer to get out the smell of egg.

  “Dar, you really outdid yourself this time. The food is amazing.” I lick my mouth, and I think I might have noticed Lucas bite his lower lip. I turn my head to see him better as he breathes out very heavily, and his eyes widen.

  “Thanks, Cass, it does taste pretty good. Hey, Lucas, since I cooked while you were trying to devour my best friend, you can take care of the dishes. Whoever cooks never does the dishes. Don’t ya know?” She gathers our empty plates and then takes them into the kitchen.

  “Well, let’s get this show on the road and go talk to Mrs. Weatherbee. I’m sure she’ll enjoy hearing we stayed the night with this bonehead.” She motions her head toward Lucas as she walks past him. “That old coot is a dirty little woman. She may be deaf, but she is funny as hell. I think she could embarrass a sailor.”

  “In my defense, I wanted to make sure we weren’t killed or raped when I locked your doors. How was I to know you left the keys inside the car?” I roll my shoulders, attempting to keep my anxiety at bay and remind myself this is Dar, my best friend.

  “The next time it happens, you can call AAA. My insurance covers the costs. Keep your panties on. I was just giving you hell. That is, if you still have them on, which I seriously doubt you do.” She winks and devilishly smiles as she sits down.

  Lucas lets out a crude cough and hits his chest to clear his throat as he set down his coffee cup. “Are you trying to kill me, Dartanya?” He looks at me as he speaks. “I’m going to take a very cold shower. You all get your things together, and then we’ll head out.” He heads down the hall into what I assume is the bathroom.

  As soon as I’m sure Lucas is no longer in hearing distance, I shoot her a frigid look. “Dartanya Elizabeth Waters!” I blurt out of frustration and throw my hands above my head. “What the hell was that about? Of course, I still have on panties. You’re such a pain in the ass. Are you trying to embarrass me to death?” I lean my elbows on the edge of the table and secure my chin in my palms, letting out a sigh.

  “Don’t you dare ‘Dartanya Elizabeth’ at me! I think you are doing quite a fine job of that all by yourself,” she spits out in a resentful tone. Her face relaxes into a candid expression. “I’m sorry, Cass. I was afraid when I couldn’t find you, and I trust Lucas and all, but you are you. I was immediately on a warpath with one mission— to kill Lucas. If he had harmed one hair on that beautiful head of yours, I believe I would have. It wasn’t until I saw you try to rip out his hair that I was confident he wasn’t taking advantage of you. Did you sleep with him?”

  I slaugh. “My gosh, Dar! I love you!” I roll my eyes in her direction. “No, I slept in the same bed as you. I hadn’t intended to go into his room. He woke me up playing his guitar and singing this morning. I wanted to hear him better, so I leaned against his bedroom door, and it opened.” I shrug my shoulder blades. “I fell on my hands and knees right in front of him. Can you believe that? I was mortified!” I shake my head at the memory.

  Dar snickers. “Oh, I must have the look of mortification confused with something else, because I’m sure that wasn’t what I saw earlier. I wish I could have seen you with your ass up in the air and on your hands and knees. I bet your face was priceless.” She tries to mimic my facial expression or how she imagines it to be, and I flip her off. “I mean, what was I supposed to think? You are wearing his clothes.” She points at me.

  “I guess I can see where you would think that,” I mumble. She is still wearing her clothes from last night. “Lucas gave me some clothes to change into last night.” I lean my head to the side and inhale.

  “Did you really just smell his shirt?” Dar pushes herself away from the table and walks around the chair. She takes the back of her hand and holds it to my forehead. “Hmm...Nope, you aren’t running a fever, so it can’t be a fever-induced delirium. You must really like him.”

  “It’s nothing more than a crush. He’s new, and holy hell, he can kiss.” She smiles, shaking her head, as if she’s aware of some joke that she’s not going to share. She pulls on my wrists until I’m standing. Without another word, she walks down the hallway, dragging me with her.

  Once we are back into the room where we stayed, I see my black dress lying across the bed. It seems as if it
has been pressed and carefully laid out. Lucas must have washed and dried it for me. As I pull Lucas’ shirt over my head, I let it linger around my face; it smells like him. I finally remove it completely and meet Dar’s judging eyes on the other side of the bed. “What?” I defensively snap, knowing exactly what she’s looking at.

  “You’re such a dork. Don’t act like you didn’t just smell his shirt, again. I swear, sometimes you weird even me out,” Dar says, throwing my dress over the mattress, hitting me in the face.

  I shrug my shoulders and throw my hands up into the air. I can’t deny what she had seen. I gather my dress from the floor where it landed and put it on. After taking off Lucas’ shorts, my heart sinks a little. I feel just like I removed one of my own appendages. It’s strange how naked I feel without Lucas’ clothes, despite the fact I have on my own. I’ve never felt like this before. It scares me to death. After my life was changed forever, I never let myself get close to anyone. Fear of getting hurt again often causes me to push people away.

  I hear the chorus of “Sail” by Awolnation, my ringtone, begin to sing from my purse lying beside the bed. The only person who ever calls me is standing in front of me.

  “Hello?” I say, after fishing out my phone and sliding my finger across the screen.

  “May I please speak with Miss Anderson?” A gruff male voice booms over the sound of running water in the background.

  “This is she. May I ask who is calling?” A heavy weight feels like it drops into the bottom of my stomach. Not knowing who is on the other end of the phone scares me.

  “Yes, ma’am, this is Lucas Daniels. I was showering, thinking of you.” He conveniently pauses, and I hear a slight muffled laugh. My face burns with embarrassment, noticing the hidden meaning of his words.

  Dar looks at me and asks, “Who is it?”

  I shake my head, refusing to answer right away. I give in and mouth, “Lucas,” to her. She appears to stifle a laugh. “I see, and just how may I help you this fine morning, sir?”

  “Well, as I told you, I was in the shower, thinking of you. I was just wondering what your favorite color is.” His voice is filled with uncertainty.

  “My favorite color? That’s really what is on your mind?” I ask point-blank, certain he’s not thinking about my preference of color.

  “No, that isn’t what I was actually thinking, but it would be inappropriate to tell you what I was really wondering about.” His voice is thick. The sound of something falling to the shower floor causes me to jump slightly. “Shit.” He clears his throat. “So, when are you going to tell me?”

  “Oh…Ugh…Green…Green is my favorite color,” I stammer over my words, distracted that he just confirmed he’s in the shower and thinking about “inappropriate” things involving me. “What is yours?” I attempt to recover, but he chuckles, and I know he can tell he’s getting to me.

  “Good to know. Mine used to be green as well, but after staring at your eyes all morning, it’s now sapphire blue. See you in a few minutes.” He shuts off the water and hangs up.

  Chapter 5

  Love

  An addiction like no other

  Withdrawals consume your thoughts

  Trigger the pain

  You’ll be desperate,

  Needing to stop the hunger

  Trying to put out the flame

  It will be what drives you and what begs you to submit

  Alas, you’ll fall slave to the master as you take your bitter hit.

  Cassandra

  I shut the door to our apartment while I let the past twenty-four hours sink in. Dar and Lucas are on their way to The Hot Spot to retrieve Dar’s car. I can’t believe she would leave her keys in the ignition of an unlocked car. Then again, this is Dar, and it’s not all too strange for her to have forgotten them. She’s so trusting; it worries me. I step out of my shoes one at a time and set them beside the door. A loose strand of hair swishes down my cheek, reminding me of last night’s endeavors. It has the lingering smell of day-old Jäger and Lucas. No wonder I was complaining of smelling like a bar to Lucas. My hair smells as if I used the contents of an entire bottle of liquor for a styling product. I need a shower.

  After brushing away the liquor-laden hair, I wiggle out of my dress and watch it fall to the dining room floor. When I enter the bathroom, I see my locket sitting on the sink where I absentmindedly left it yesterday. I don’t know what I would do if it got lost. Although when Lucas is around, I don’t seem to need it as much. That fact alone has me questioning where I stand with him. After such a short span of time, I can feel myself falling for him, and it scares the shit out of me. After this morning, I’m certain of one thing, if nothing else. If kissing were an Olympic sport, Lucas would hold the gold medal. The man can kiss.

  Generally, I have been able to push away any man who has shown an interest in me. I can only assume it’s because of my snide comments and the absence of anyone reciprocating feelings on my behalf. I’ve never really asked the men what caused them to run. I didn’t care to hear how it wasn’t anything I had done, knowing the entire time it was everything I had done or hadn’t done. Lucas, on the other hand, challenges things I say and demands the truth from me. It is like he actually wants to take the time to get to know who I am. I promised myself I would trust no one, especially when it came to my heart, and thus far in life I have been successful. That is, until I met him. We are like two magnets with opposites charges. Regardless of how hard they are pulled apart from each other, their natural attraction will inevitably pull them together.

  I release a loud sigh and step into the shower, trying to free my thoughts of him, even if it’s only for the duration of a shower. I’ve never used hard drugs, but I imagine this is exactly what it feels like being an addict. Constantly yearning for the next hit, not feeling sated until the needle pierces your skin and floods your veins with the one thing that is always on your mind. Lucas Isaiah Daniels is definitely under my skin. He does have an amazing body, a certain rough appeal that would lure any woman. Letting the water bead down my body, I stand and close my eyes while my mind continues to overflow with different possibilities as to why I’m so captivated by him.

  The bathroom door slams, causing me to jump and lose my balance. I catch myself on the shower wall and yank back the shower curtain with the intention of giving Dar a piece of my mind. She doesn’t know the meaning of privacy. “What the hell, Dar? Oh, shit!” I scream, frantically closing the shower curtain so that it covers my body. I know I’m safe behind the confines of this nylon curtain, and he can’t see me, but I still cover myself. “What the hell, Lucas? I have no idea what is going on in that sick head of yours, but get out of here!” By the end, I am yelling. He truly is one sick individual. He is in my bathroom and shirtless nonetheless. Seriously? Was he planning to sneak into the shower with me? At least the look of absolute shock that was on his face makes me feel a little better.

  “Don’t laugh, okay? But, I can’t leave. I’m sorry I barged in here like this, but um...okay...fine. I knocked on the door, and you didn’t answer. I checked the doorknob, and it was unlocked. Dartanya never locks anything. I have no idea how something bad hasn’t happened to her.” At least we agree on that fact. “Anyway, I came in and heard the water running. I knew you were in the shower, so I decided to wait on the couch.”

  He stops talking, and I assume he is waiting for my response. “Mmm…hmm, you can get to the point any time now.” Quickly, I rinse out my hair and let the water wash off the remainder of soap from my skin. I keep one eye on the curtain the entire time. This sure doesn’t look like waiting on the couch to me. I turn off the water and wait for him to respond. I ball my hands into fists. I know it’s immature to sulk, but he is infuriating.

  “Out of the corner of my eye, I thought I saw something move on the back of the couch, but I decided I was seeing things.” He paces in front of the shower and continues, “Then, I knew for sure I wasn’t imagining things when I felt something lightly brush
across my back. I turned my head to see what it was, only to meet the eyes of Satan reincarnated! So, I jumped over the side of the couch and ripped off my shirt because that filthy thing touched it. I made a beeline into here because it was a straight shot.” Well, that answers my question why he ran in here instead of my bedroom.

  “Satan is in my living room? Do you have any idea how crazy you sound?” I had tried to hide my amusement as I spoke, but a giggle escaped my lips when I said, ‘Satan’.

  “Well, obviously Lucifer himself isn’t in the living room, but one of his minions has claimed your couch. It was a mouse!” I squeal and consider taking another shower. “You have a freaking mouse inside your apartment! There is just something about their soulless eyes staring back at me that makes me cringe. Yes, I am a twenty-four-year-old man, and I’m afraid of mice,” he embarrassedly admits.

  “We have a mouse?” I have always been terrified of any animal that makes its habitat on the ground, but I think Lucas may be more frightened than I am. “So...ugh...we clearly can’t stay in the bathroom all day.” I try to give him a hint that I would like to get out.

  “Actually, we could. I’m already partially undressed. I could just join you in there, and we could finish what we started earlier.” Even though I can’t see him, I can imagine him wiggling his eyebrows up and down. I’ve noticed anytime we are talking about something that makes him uncomfortable, he makes a proposition to me.

  “Please, hand me my towels, and then we will figure out what to do,” I flatly say, shooting down his suggestion.

  I hear him groan. “Love, I’ve already seen your gorgeous body. I don’t understand why you would ever cover up yourself. It’s an absolute travesty to keep something that delectable from the world.” His voice is soft and tantalizing. I bite my lower lip. I hear him walk across the bathroom and then see a hand reaching into the shower holding two towels.