Kiss Me Crazy

by Vanessa Vale

  Dash took hold of my chin and turned me so I had to look at him. His fingers were gentle, the long line of his body hard, yet so very warm. “You should have figured out by now that we’ll do whatever it takes to keep you with us. Even if it takes handcuffs.”

  I couldn’t miss the dark look in his eyes. It was too intense. Too honest. Even Jackson seemed unusually stoic as he waited for me to respond.

  They were serious. About me. About us.

  Panic had me struggling to sit up again. It wasn’t just panic at the thought of them wanting me—and trust me, as a Bridgewater native, I knew exactly what that entailed. No, what had my adrenaline pumping was the weird longing I felt in my chest. They wanted me…and it seemed some part of me was tempted to want them right back. And for more than a wild night. No handcuffs needed. And it wasn’t just my vagina.

  Fuck. That was so not part of the plan. I was only here for a couple more days. After that I’d leave Bridgewater behind, as always. Tempting or not, it wasn’t in the cards. They weren’t in the cards.

  But the night wasn’t over and I so did not want to go there tonight. They weren’t pushing the issue so why would I ruin a perfectly fun time by talking about the future? Especially when I knew there was no future, not for us, at least.

  They were watching me with concern, probably because of the way I’d bolted upright like a scaredy-cat. They may have been in control before, but I decided my fate. And I was taking that one day at a time. One night. And tonight, I’d stay right between them.

  I turned to face them with a wicked grin, still dangling the cuffs from one finger. “Tell me, boys, can’t you think of some other way to control me without having to lock me up?”

  Their answering smiles were sexy as hell.

  “You want us in control again?” Dash asked, his dimple creasing his cheek.

  I bit my lip, nodded.

  Dash pushed the blankets down to the foot of the bed, gripped his cock. “Suck me, baby doll, while Jackson fucks your ass.”

  My eyes widened at the dark words. Really dark. Jackson reached out, grabbed the lube and another condom from the bedside table.

  For all of Dash’s dominant tone, he winked at me. Yeah, while they might be in control, I definitely had all the power. I wanted this with them. No, I wanted them. And so I came up onto my knees and submitted. All night long.

  9

  AVERY

  * * *

  Two one-night-stands with the same guys. This was something of a record. Guys, plural, definitely, but it was the twice thing that was a big deal. They dropped me off at my parents’ place on their way to the animal hospital. I’d hoped it was after my parents left for work to avoid any horrifyingly personal questions about my overnight activities, but that was not to be.

  They were home. And arguing.

  “—at least do it where no one knows about it,” my mother said, her voice sharp. Loud enough to carry from the kitchen.

  I silently closed the front door behind me, took off my coat.

  “Please,” my father countered. “Everyone working at the hotel on 7th knows about you and your man candy.”

  Mom laughed, although she wasn’t amused. “Man candy? At least he’s legal.”

  I toed off my boots and winced when they thudded on the rubber mat. The bickering stopped and they both came into the living room.

  “Where have you been?” my mother asked. She wore pants and a sweater, but she had yet to do her makeup or put on jewelry.

  My father was dressed for work—minus his shoes which were on the mat by my boots—and held a mug of coffee. The dark scent of it was the only comforting thing in the house. There was no Christmas tree. No lit fireplace. No warmth whatsoever. Not even from my parents.

  God, I couldn’t remember the last time they hugged me. Mrs. Wray hugged me at least five times during the party and I’d just met her. Jackson’s dads had hugged me, too. They smiled, were warm and welcoming. Didn’t judge. They just liked me because Jackson did.

  They respected their son, loved him unconditionally. Dash, too.

  And yet my parents were like strangers to me. Strangers who knew my past. My barely loved past.

  “I told you, I had a date.”

  “All night?” my father asked. His tone was accusing and it made me bristle.

  “I’m not sixteen, Dad.” I took off my other boot with a thump.

  He sniffed. “Still, you have a reputation to uphold.”

  Okay, now I was pissed. I was tired. I was no longer relaxed from a wild night of fucking. I hadn’t had my coffee and my father was accusing me of ruining my reputation? I bit my lip before I said something I might regret.

  “You should talk,” Mom snapped at Dad.

  “Jesus, Marla,” he countered. “Everyone’s going to be talking about Avery’s tawdry behavior at Jackie’s wedding.”

  I hung up my coat on the hook, rolled my eyes. Tawdry behavior?

  “Isn’t your secretary on the invite list?” she snapped, and I realized his secretary was his latest girl-on-the-side.

  “I’m going to take a shower,” I said, making them look at me again. I made it three feet before my mother held up a hand.

  “I hung up your dress for the wedding in your closet. Make sure it fits right as you were in Mexico or Mozambique and missed the fitting. We want the family photos to look good.”

  “Family? You want the family photos to look good,” I repeated, my tone incredulous. “Why? So you can continue to fake that we’re still an actual family? You don’t care about me or my job, what I do. What makes me happy.”

  My mother’s eyebrows were up beneath her dark bangs. “How can we? You’re never here.”

  “All you have to do is ask, Mom. I have email, video calling, a phone. Being in the same town shouldn’t make a difference.”

  I thought of Dash and Jackson. They wanted me however and wherever they could get me. No strings.

  They understood me, what made me tick after a few days in a way my parents still didn’t.

  “You’re here now,” she countered. While she’d pursed her lips, she offered no outward sign of anger. She’d had tons of practice with Dad. “You’re father’s right. You shouldn’t be walking in the front door in the same clothes you left in.”

  I tossed my hands up in the air. “You’ve been pushing me to find a nice guy to date here in Bridgewater. I’ve found two. Now you’re telling me I’m overdoing it? Can you ever just be happy?”

  “Don’t talk to your mother that way,” Dad snapped.

  “Why not? You do.”

  That was it. I was done. I went into my room, slammed the door. Talking to them was like beating my head against the wall. This was the first time I’d ever really spoken back. While I wanted to say it felt good, it actually felt pretty awful because it made no difference. They weren’t going to change. When they came home from work, they’d be right back at each other. And me.

  * * *

  I showered, then slept most of the day, but made sure I was out of the house before my parents returned. It was happy hour and I was in a booth at the Barking Dog, Jackson and Dash having met me right from the clinic. God, I hadn’t been to this bar in ages. It still looked exactly the same. Like everything else in Bridgewater, the local pub seemed to be stuck in time, for better or worse.

  Not that I was complaining—tonight its familiarity was a comfort. Or maybe I was just feeling all snug and content because I had Jackson’s hand on my knee on one side and Dash’s arm wrapped around me on the other as they told me about their day’s cases. Two dogs, a parakeet, two sheep and a wild story about capturing a feral cat. Music pumped from the jukebox and the beer was nice and cold.

  Besides the feral cat, a girl could get used to this.

  I sighed, realizing I couldn’t think things like that. I couldn’t let myself get confused just because I was having fun in Bridgewater for once, despite the verbal brawl I had with my parents. One great, sex-filled visit did not a commitme
nt make. It was a pleasant experience to be savored and enjoyed…and then walk away. My heart safe.

  Savored and enjoyed. I inwardly laughed because that was so not how I should describe what I did with Dash and Jackson. And it wasn’t just pleasant. It was mind blowing. Wild. Insane. Incredible.

  Yet, I was still leaving.

  Jackson had to have been reading my mind because he said, “So, Avery, when do you fly out for your next assignment?”

  Dash’s grip on my shoulder tightened, but he didn’t comment.

  “Right after the wedding,” I said, looking down at my pint glass. I took a sip, let the bitter taste settle on my tongue.

  “Brazil, right?” Jackson asked.

  I nodded. “Amazon rain forest.”

  I so didn’t want to talk about it. I was enjoying this moment, and very pointedly not thinking about the future. Or, more importantly, my impending departure. For the first time, a plane seat didn’t seem all too appealing. Loading up my suitcase, a pain. Customs. Jet lag. Loneliness. I frowned just thinking of it all. I felt like Scrooge, sucking the pleasure out of the holiday season.

  Bah humbug.

  “Will you be safe?” Dash’s voice was gruff in my ear and his grip hadn’t eased up in the slightest.

  “Of course,” I said, flicking my gaze up to him. I hoped. “I take every precaution to be careful.” My voice sounded stiff and I’d automatically folded my arms across my chest defensively.

  Jackson looked at Dash over my head and I felt Dash’s grip relax. His hand rubbed the area he’d been gripping as if trying to make it feel better. “Sorry, Avery. I didn’t mean that to sound so—”

  “Overbearing?” I suggested. Like my parents?

  Dash sighed. “Yeah, that. It’s not that I don’t trust you. Hell, you’re the most self-sufficient, independent woman I know. That’s one of the things that’s so attractive about you.”

  “And your breasts,” Jackson added, giving me a wink.

  I smiled at him as Dash continued.

  “I just worry about your safety. It’s our job to keep you safe.”

  Jackson groaned softly beside me just before I gave them a reminder.

  “I didn’t sign up for that. You don’t need to protect me.” I turned to Jackson. “And you don’t need to try to keep me here, either. I get enough of that from my family. I’ll decide what I do with my future.”

  “We know,” Jackson said quickly, putting his palms flat on the table as if he were afraid to touch me. “And we apologize if we’re too heavy-handed. It’s just—”

  “We know what we want,” Dash finished. “We’ve been waiting a long time to find The One, and you’re it, baby doll.”

  Wow. Okay. I hadn’t expected that. The words were impossible to ignore. They had a physical effect on me, making my chest tighten and my heart beat faster. Such pretty words, but that didn’t change anything. I knew what they were talking about—the Bridgewater way. They wanted me to settle down. Settle down. Two words that made me cringe no matter how much I loved the thought of being with them. Having them protect me as much as they wanted. To be wanted.

  “I suppose you guys think I should quit, right? To come back here and just give it all up. Maybe be a waitress like Jackie.” I laughed softly but there was no humor in it. They wanted me to give up a part of myself to be together. They just didn’t understand. No one did. “Join the club.”

  Jackson’s hand cupped my chin and gently turned me to face him. “That’s not what we’re saying at all. And don’t lump us in with your parents.”

  I stared at him, brow furrowed. He looked so sincere. Turning to face Dash, I saw he was nodding in agreement. “We told you this before. We’d never ask that of you. You clearly love what you do and we support that one hundred percent.”

  “We’re proud of your accomplishments,” Jackson added, giving a quick wave to someone across the room.

  Proud of me and my job? It took my head and my heart a moment to process that. Finally, I cleared my throat.

  “But you want me to stay,” I clarified. “And you’re upset that I’m traveling again.”

  “We don’t care that you travel,” Dash said slowly, took a sip of his beer to pause. “We just want to make sure you’re safe when you do. The thought of you being in danger…” His voice trailed off as he shook his head, as if the very thought was too horrible to speak of. “We’d feel this way if you had to go to Brazil or Butte. Hell, even to the grocery store on 7th, especially this time of year with the roads being icy.”

  Their genuine concern softened the last of my defenses and I leaned back against Dash’s chest, wrapping his arm around me once more before taking Jackson’s hand in mine.

  “You have a point,” I admitted. It took a lot for me to say this out loud but they’d been honest with me, so it was the least I could give in return. “I love my job, but I don’t always like the situations it puts me in.” I shivered at the memory of those gunshots in Mexico.

  Dash kissed the top of my head as if to say thank you for my admission. “We’d never ask you to quit. Besides, I wouldn’t mind going with you some time, someplace tropical where I can make sure you’re completely covered in sunscreen. Completely covered, then sit back and stare at your gorgeous tan lines.”

  That sounded pretty good.

  Jackson squeezed my hand and gave me that slow grin that drove me crazy. Hell, their kisses made me crazy. Everything about them made me crazy.

  “We just want you to come back to us between assignments so we can pamper you and make sure you’re safe and healthy. We want to share our lives with you. Our jobs, yours. Everything.”

  I stared at him for a moment as Dash nuzzled the side of my neck. Holy shit, that sounded too good to be true.

  “As long as you come home and get in bed between us, I’ll be a happy man,” Dash admitted.

  There was a silence as I processed that, and I knew they were waiting for me to respond. But my attention was snagged by a familiar figure dancing by the jukebox on the far side of the bar.

  I sat up so quickly I accidentally elbowed Dash in the gut, which made him grunt.

  “What is it?” Jackson asked. “See someone you know?”

  I smiled at the sight of Jackie laughing and dancing. “You could say that.” I gave Jackson a nudge. “Let me out, I need to say hi to my sister.”

  Jackson helped me up, but stayed behind with Dash. I grinned as I walked up to her. I hadn’t had a chance to see her yet since she lived with her fiancé. She’d been tied up with wedding preparations and I—my mind flashed back to the way my men had cuffed me and I stifled a laugh. Well, I guess I’d been pretty tied up, too.

  Jackie’s back was to me and I’d nearly reached her when I slowed my steps. She was dancing, all right, but not with her fiancé. I’d met Collin over the summer and he was a tall, thin, blond guy. The man Jackie was grinding up against on the dance floor was burly, bald-headed, and looked more like a biker than a car salesman. Definitely not Collin.

  She spun around and caught sight of me. Her eyes grew comically wide and she burst out in a squeal that had every eye in the place glancing in our direction. “Oh my God!” she screamed as she tackled me with a hug. “My sis is here!”

  “Hey, Jackie,” I said, untangling her arms from around my neck as the bear hug lasted just a bit too long. “Good to see you.”

  I looked from her to the biker dude who’d moved to lean against the bar and guzzle half a beer, his gaze never leaving my sister. Or rather, my sister’s ass.

  “How, uh…how are the wedding preparations going?” I asked.

  She rolled her eyes. “Ugh. Don’t even talk to me about the wedding. I wish it was over already.”

  Huh. Okay. That was not exactly the happy bride-to-be response I’d expected. I figured she’d gush about her dress or the cake or something. Even the honeymoon.

  “Is everything okay with you and Collin?” I asked, my gaze once again moving meaningfully toward Baldie at the
bar.

  Jackie shrugged. “Yeah. It’s fine. Whatever. Same old, same old.”

  Same old, same old? How romantic. She finally seemed to see where I was looking and she slung an arm around my neck with a laugh. “Oh him? He’s just in town for a few days. It doesn’t mean anything.” She leaned in close so she whispered in my ear. “You should see the cock on him. Huge.”

  I nodded. Sure. A big cock. Dirty dancing with a near stranger days before her own wedding didn’t mean anything?

  She rolled her eyes. When a new song blared, she started to sway to the music. “Don’t give me that look, sis. It’s not a big deal. Collin wouldn’t care if he was here.” She sniffed and her tone was laced with derision. “He probably wouldn’t even notice.”

  I recognized that tone. She sounded exactly like my mother when speaking about my father. My stomach sank. Jackie leaned back and asked, “Do you need a drink? Let me grab you a beer.”

  I didn’t answer. The revelation hit me over the head like a ton of bricks. Holy shit. Jackie was turning out to be just like my parents. She was marrying Collin and it seemed she didn’t even love him. Not if she was living with him while she became well acquainted with a just-passing-through big cock.

  It was too depressing for words. Minutes passed as I stood there in the middle of the dance floor watching my sister go order my drink, then forget to bring it back to me. I saw Baldie chatting her up and despite the fact that my drink was sitting in front of her getting warm, Jackie giggled and flirted. Then his hand moved to her ass and it was well beyond flirting.

  Poor Collin.

  Poor Jackie. Maybe it wasn’t her fault. Maybe it was my parents’ fault for raising her to have such little regard for marriage vows and commitment. For love. For raising us that way. After all, I’d been raised in the same house. Sure, I hadn’t cheated on anyone—not yet—but I’d spent the better part of my adult life running from commitment, so maybe I was no better.

  Maybe if I ever did fall in love, I’d end up exactly like the rest of my family. Cold and bitter.