BeForeplay

by Josie Charles

  11

  When I get to my room I take a shower and down a sleeping pill. I hate taking them but I need to shut down and get some sleep. I set the alarm on my phone for seven, climb in bed and turn the TV on.

  The next thing I know someone is grabbing me and I’m screaming and trying to fight but I can’t seem to get my arms and legs to cooperate. When I wake fully I’m in someone’s arms and they’re rocking me back and forth to soothe me. When I finally come all the way out of it there are a bunch of people in my room and Derik is the one holding me. What the fuck? I scramble off his lap and look at everyone. I ask no one in particular, “What the hell’s going on?” My voice comes out all scratchy and my throat hurts.

  A large man I’m assuming is security asks me, “Ma’am there were reports of screaming and when we knocked no one answered. You continued screaming, we assumed you were hurt so we let ourselves in. Are you okay now? Would you like us to call somebody?”

  “What? No, I’m fine. I was having a nightmare for god’s sake.” I grab the bottle of water off the nightstand and drink some.

  Haylie and Will are even here. She speaks softly to me. “Sidney, you’ve been screaming for almost half an hour. I called down and reported it because you wouldn’t answer your door and you kept screaming. Then we called Derik because we thought maybe he knew what was happening.”

  Why the fuck would he know? Good grief. I plop back down on the bed and that’s when I realize I only have on lace boy shorts and a tank top. Great! I snatch the sheet and cover myself, tell them I’m fine and ask everyone to leave. I look at the clock and it’s six-thirty. What a way to start the day. I thank them and they all leave except Derik. He’s just staring at me.

  “What?” I snap at him.

  He looks down and then back up at me. “I’m sorry but, Sidney, those weren’t normal nightmare screams. Are you sure you’re okay?”

  I close my eyes to try and gather my thoughts and calm down. I look at him and give him a tight smile. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you I’m just…I had to take a sleeping pill last night. That’s why I was trapped in my dreams and didn’t hear the knocking. I don’t take them often but I didn’t feel well last night and just wanted to sleep. Thank you for your help.”

  He comes and sits on the bed next to me. “Since we’re up how about breakfast?”

  “That sounds good. Do you mind if I take a shower first?”

  “As long as you don’t mind me waiting in your living room for you.”

  I look him in the eye when I speak. “I really am fine, you don’t have to stay here. You probably want to go get cleaned up yourself. I can meet you down there in a half hour.”

  He lifts his arm up and sniffs under it and does the same with the other one. “I don’t stink do I?” He smiles at me. “No worries, I was already up and ready for the day. I was actually down in the casino when Haylie called. I only got a few hours of sleep from being so excited about last night. I know it sounds ridiculous but that’s what got me into professional racing, so to go back to the root of it all is still exciting.” He jumps up off the bed and says, “Okay, go get ready while I watch TV,” and walks out of the room.

  I go in the bathroom and take a quick shower. When I step out my feet come out from under me. I try to catch myself but wind up hurting my wrist. Of course when I fell I let out a yelp. This is going to be one of those days. The bathroom door flings open and Derik is running in, his eyes huge. All I can do is shut my eyes and take a deep breath.

  When I open them he spins around so he’s not staring at me in all my glory. If I wouldn’t have been in such a hurry I might have remembered to put down the bath mat and gotten myself a towel too.

  “Are you alright?”

  “Kind of, maybe, no not really. Could you please hand me a couple of towels so I can cover myself up?” He hands me the towels without looking at me. I lay one on the floor so I can stand up without slipping again. When I’m up I wrap the other one around me. “Okay, I’m covered up now.”

  He turns around and asks, “Where are you hurt?”

  I wipe my feet on the towel I’m standing on so I can go to the bedroom. “My wrist. I slipped and tried to catch myself, which was stupid to begin with.”

  He follows me into the bedroom and sits in a chair. “Not stupid. It’s an automatic reaction to try and catch yourself.”

  I go to my suitcase and pull out my first aid kit. I also grab my robe and put it on. I sit back on the bed and ask him if he can wrap it for me.

  He’s looking at me like I’m crazy. “No. I think you should go to a walk in medical clinic and have an x-ray to make sure it’s not broken.”

  “It’s not fractured, just a minor sprain.”

  “How do you know? I’ll wrap it and take you to the doctor.” He walks over and sits next to me taking the first aid kit from me.

  “You do know I’m a nurse right?” His head whips around with his forehead all scrunched up and shakes his head back and forth. “I thought I…oh I told the girls not you. I’m sorry. No, really it’s just a minor sprain. You wrap it, I’ll ice it and take some ibuprofen. It’ll be good as new in no time.”

  After we take care of my wrist, I dress and we go down for breakfast. While waiting for our food to arrive I ask, “So what are you going to do with the Chevelle?”

  He shrugs his shoulders. “Probably sell it to a classic car collector. I have enough cars at home and it’s not the one I was hoping to win. Plus the engine is blown and I don’t feel like messing with it.”

  This puts a smile on my face. “Can I buy it from you?”

  “No.” He says this with a straight face so I know he’s not joking.

  My smile drops and so does my spirit. “Why not? You’re selling it anyways.”

  He smiles at me, fucker. “Because, I’ll give it to you.” Okay so maybe I was being a little harsh in calling him a fucker.

  “No, I can’t let you do that but I will buy it from you. Name a price.”

  He leans back in his chair and his cocky face returns. “Okay. A dinner date, just the two of us.”

  I sigh and now his smile fades. “Derik, you know I just ended a relationship. I don’t want to date anyone right now. Why me? From what I understand you’re sought after by plenty of women.”

  He leans forward and rests his forearms on the table. “Because you had no idea who I was and when you found out you still treated me like a normal person. And you’re not afraid to speak your mind and tell me when I’m being an ass. You’re beautiful, funny and kind. Should I keep going or does that answer your question?”

  I can feel my cheeks heat a little. I don’t take compliments easily. “Yes and thank you. If we would have met at another time I would have no problem accepting the date but since it’s not do you think we could take that off the table and be friends?”

  I can tell he’s disappointed. “Sure, we can be friends.”

  My smile comes back and it’s a big cheesy one. “Good. Now let me buy the car from you and one more thing. Will you teach me how to race it like you did last night?”

  He scowls at me. “Is that why you want the car so bad?” I nod my head excitedly like a child and he laughs at me. “Okay here’s my proposal. I give you the car,” I start to interrupt but he holds his hand up to let him finish, so I do. “But you use my guys to rebuild it and pay them for their work. I will teach you to drag race but I won’t be able to help very often because of my schedule. If you give me some time I can find someone to help and practice with you, someone I trust to instruct you, if you want.”

  After breakfast and more coffee than I should have had we worked out all of the details. He has a friend that owns a shop in his hometown that will be rebuilding the engine for me. I will plan my trips to Texas when he’s home so he can help teach me the ins and outs of drag racing. His words ‘so you won’t just race you’ll also win the races’. When it’s all said and done I’ll have a car and a NHRA Competition License. I’m so ex
cited I could swim the coast home plus I really shouldn’t have had all the coffee I did.

  His group is headed home today and I was thinking maybe I should cancel the condo and head home myself. A lot has happened in two days that has my mindset in a different direction instead of focusing on the memories. I’ll also be able to make an appointment with my counselor and see her quicker than anticipated.

  Using my phone to check flights leaving today I see I’m in luck. There’s one leaving around noon so I book a ticket. I have some time so I hit the slots one more time. I walk around and find a slot machine with seven’s and fireballs. When I sit down I realize it’s a five dollar slot machine and figure what the hell. I pop a few hundred dollars in hit the max bet and am having fun. The waitress comes around and I get a water from her. God knows I don’t need anything with caffeine. I open the bottle take a drink, hit the spin button and proceed to choke because I just hit some kind of jackpot!!! When I’m done with my coughing fit someone to my left says, “Congratulations.” I look and see she works here because she’s wearing a name tag and explaining that they’ll be right over with the paperwork and money after she takes my government issued ID and my social security card. They would also like to take a picture of me with a check saying how much I won.

  “How much did I win?”

  She smiles and her eyes are dancing in the lights. “Fifty-two thousand dollars.”

  WHAT!?! Holy shit it’s a damn good thing I’m sitting down. Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! I’m shaking. What should I do? I’ll text Derik and see if he can come to where I am. I can’t jump around by myself.

  Me: Hey its Sid are you busy?

  Derik: What’s up sweetheart?

  Me: Can you come to the casino floor where the $5 slots are?

  Derik: You ok?

  Me: Yup can you come?

  Derik: On my way.

  I look up and shit there are a ton of people hanging around me. When they see I’ve put my phone in my pocket they all congratulate me and start going on about their business.

  I’m staring at the machine in awe when I hear, “You’ve got to be shitting me.”

  I turn around and there’s Derik with the rest of his friends in tow. I jump up and run the couple of steps to hug him. He’s laughing, I’m laughing and so is everyone else. I let him go and hug everyone else too. The girls ask how much I won and I squeal, “Fifty-two thousand dollars!”

  They start squealing too, grab my good hand and we start jumping up and down. When we stop I look at Derik and see him smiling shaking his head back and forth. I step next to him and bump him with my shoulder while saying, “I bet you wish you would have sold me the car now, huh?”

  “Nope. I have and make a lot of money sweetheart, don’t need yours. What I do need is your luck. Damn woman, you’ve won almost fifty-five thousand dollars just from the little time I’ve spent with you. I’d say you have the direct line on it.” If he only knew I have no luck in the things that matter in life.

  There are three employees that come and congratulate me, give me my money and the ‘big check’ for the picture. I ask if the rest of my party can be in the picture and they agree. We’re all in front of the check but I hold it up so you can only see from my eyes up. It’s a good thing I’m the shortest out of the rest. Like I said, I like my privacy and only my first name and last initial will go up with the picture.

  After we’ve said our goodbyes I go to my room to pack up and head to the airport bound for home. I also shoot Tasha a text.

  Me: Should be home around 2

  Tasha: Yay! Need a ride?

  Me: Would love it. Meet you at baggage claim?

  Tasha: See you soon

  Me: Thanks. Much to tell

  Tasha: So I see

  What the hell does that mean? Something must be going on. Shit, I hope Jack is okay.

 

  Chapter

  12

  While waiting in line to board I put my phone on airplane mode and shut it off. When we’re in the air and allowed to use electronics I turn my phone back on to finally read all of the texts from Jack. I’ve ignored every single one he sent. I didn’t want to deal with anything. Since I’m on my way home I figured I better catch up on what he’s feeling. There are five texts from him.

  Fri 11:48 pm: Call me

  Sat 1:23 am: Sidney this is not fair. Please call me.

  Sat 7:56 pm: You don’t get to decide what’s best for me.

  Sun 2:11 am: WTF? Is he the reason you left me?

  Oh hell, someone recognized me from the picture with Derik. That must be what Tasha was talking about.

  Sun 11:16 am: I just want to talk

  When we land I turn my phone on and text Jack.

  Me: If you’re not working my house 6 for dinner?

  Jack: I’ll be there

  I meet Tasha at baggage claim and give her the rundown on my trip while on our way home.

  She looks over at me quickly and I can tell she wants to say something. “Just say it.”

  “Jack’s not taking this too well. I just want you to be prepared. And how is it wherever you go you attract all the hotties and turn them down. Sidney, you of all people should not be single.”

  “I do not! And let me remind you I would still be with Jack but he deserves more than I can give him otherwise we’d still be together.”

  “What the hell is wrong with you?” I whip my head to look at her and she’s mad. Why the fuck is she pissed at me? “You give everyone and when I say everyone I mean even the cashier at the store one hundred percent of yourself. So this shit about not being enough for Jack is just that, shit. Every person you date, and take an interest in, you find something you don’t like and then kick them to the curb. That’s called being selfish. You compromise, not say adios.”

  Now I’m pissed. She may be my best friend but she doesn’t know me. No one knows the real me. I’m not good enough for Jack, I know that, so how is breaking up with him so he can find a woman that can give him everything being selfish? Fuck her and anybody else that thinks that.

  “I’m not going to say anything because I don’t want to say something I don’t mean.” The rest of the drive is quiet. When we get to the house I thank her for the ride, grab my bags and go home. Now I’m in a shit mood and still need to go to the store so I can cook dinner and talk to Jack.

  While I’m at the store I get a text from Derik.

  Derik: Mon the 17th. Your car will be ready and I have a few days off. Can you fly in?

  I squeal like a little kid in the meat department while bouncing up and down. People can see the phone in my hand so they can just keep on looking. It’s not like they haven’t seen someone exited before.

  Me: I’ll be there!!

  Derik: We’ll talk soon

  I’m making lasagna with garlic bread and a salad. Comfort food. I think we could both use some at this point. I’m mixing the salad listening to my music, which I should turn down, going over what to say in my head when someone grabs me around the waist. Half the salad goes flying as I scream bloody murder. I round on the person and Jack’s standing there with his hands up in a ‘don’t shoot’ position with a piece of cucumber on his shoulder. All I can do is laugh and hold my hand over my heart. He scared the bejesus out of me. He walks over and turns my music down. “Sorry, you were expecting me so I didn’t think I’d scare you.”

  I’m on the floor picking up the salad from my spaz attack while trying to calm my heart rate. “It’s okay. I was in my head and didn’t hear you come in.” I keep my head down because his eyes have darker bags under them than I’ve ever seen. I did that to him and it makes me want to cry. He must hear the anguish in my voice because he bends down and grabs my hands so I’ll look at him. When I do he pulls me up and wraps his arms around me. He’s consoling me and that’s what makes me lose the battle with holding back the tears.

  “Jack, I’m so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you and…and you deserve so much better than me.” I’m
sobbing and I know he probably couldn’t understand me but I had to tell him.

  He squeezes me tighter rubbing his hand up and down my back. “Breathe. Calm down and breathe.”

  When I feel I have my emotions under control I loosen my grip and in return he does the same. I step back mumble a thanks and finish cleaning up the floor. Jack grabs two placemats, the plates, salad bowls and silverware. This is or was our normal routine.

  While I’m putting the garlic bread in the oven he says, “Can you tell me about the picture of you and that guy?”

  I close the oven and go stand next to the counter where he can see my eyes. I want him to know there isn’t someone else. “Yes, I can. When I left here I went to Biloxi. When I was playing a slot machine he tried to hit on me. I told him no way and even called him an ass.” This got a chuckle from him and it makes me smile. “Anyways. He invited me to dinner at a steak house in the casino with a group of people he was with. I went instead of eating alone. I needed to keep my mind busy. At dinner I found out that they were racecar drivers-”

  “Wait, you didn’t know who he was?”

  I shake my head. “Nope. Had no clue. Still don’t really but I know he’s famous and his brother is an up and coming driver. So Brian’s wife, Judy, asked me if I’d like to go to the races the next night with them to watch. I accepted. Now here’s the thing, before we went to eat I won over two thousand dollars so Derik was calling me lucky. Then after dinner some of us went and played blackjack and we won there too. So the whole thing with the picture is him trying to show me his car and hauler. The reporter jumped in front of us and started snapping pictures and hurling questions Derik turned me so he could protect me, that’s it. Nothing more. No handholding, kissing, nothing. I’m not looking for someone else, Jack. I just don’t feel like I can be enough for you. Oh, and before I left this morning I was playing a slot machine, a five dollar one by mistake, and won. You ready for this? Fifty-two thousand dollars!”

  He jumps off the stool and grabs me up swinging me around. “That’s awesome, Sid!”