The Avenger

by Jo Robertson

  She screams again.

  Chapter Fifteen

  As he clawed his way out of the dream, the remnants wound around Jack's consciousness like fog tendrils. He knew instinctively that an anomaly had occurred, for he hadn't taken any medication, and he couldn't be sure if he'd actually slept or fallen into a kind of trance.

  He glanced at his wrist watch. Twenty minutes had passed since he'd smelled the roses. The coffee cup rested on his thigh, his finger still inserted through the handle. He tested the brew.

  Cold.

  In the bathroom he stared at his reflection in the mirror. Under the harsh light, the changes were more pronounced. The dilated pupils like large black holes. The heavy jaw, the thickening beard. The stretching and throbbing beneath his skin.

  He returned to the sitting area, sank onto the sofa, pressed a thumb and forefinger between his eyes as he strained to remember. To wean himself off the meds and deconstruct the dream without relying on the blue tablets.

  He'd lain down, remained awake for several hours. Then he'd prepared the coffee and sat on the balcony to enjoy the rose garden… and suddenly he was racing in the African jungle as if jackals were after him. And then Olivia appeared, attempted to save him, was injured.

  Damn, he didn't think the dream was about the case at all.

  "Jack, what are you doing sitting in the dark?"

  Almost as though his thoughts had conjured her, Olivia entered through the connecting door and pressed the button for the lamp by the sofa. Soft light flooded the room. Jack blinked twice as his sensitive eyes shrank from the glare. The last thing he wanted was for Olivia to see the transformations, however subtle. "Turn off the light," he growled.

  "But it's not brigh – "

  "Goddamn it, turn it off!"

  Olivia quickly turned down the dimmer.

  Feverish and wracked with a bizarre kind of pain, he hunched on the sofa and tried to control the Change. It was useless. It was coming on without the red pills.

  Avoiding Olivia's eyes, he sniffed like a predator scenting its quarry. His muscles twitched with the urge to pounce, to hunt, to mate. With superhuman strength, he searched for the slender thread of humanity he prayed was still there and clung to it for dear life.

  In the near darkness Olivia watched Jack hulk like a wounded animal, his back toward her. The soft glow from the moon barely reached the table in front of the sofa. She walked determinedly forward, her hands groping like a blind person. "What's wrong?"

  "Nothing." The voice didn't sound at all like Jack.

  "You can't fool me. I know you too well. Something's wrong."

  He barked out a bitter laugh. "If you know what's best, you'll leave me alone."

  Eyes adjusting, she advanced further, knelt in front of him, and placed her hands on his thighs. Although she couldn't see his face, she sensed the difference in him. Heat emanated from his body, hot and dry through the clothes beneath her fingers.

  She snatched back her hand. "You're burning up with fever!"

  "Go away," he snarled. "Leave." When she hesitated, he roared, "Now, for Christ's sake!"

  "You're crazy if you think I'm leaving you alone like this." When he didn't answer, she reached for the phone. "All right, I'm calling a doctor."

  "No!" He grabbed her wrist, jerking it hard. There'd be an ugly bruise tomorrow, she thought. Uneasiness fluttered in her chest.

  "Okay, okay," he conceded. "I… I'll take some aspirin and lie down. It's just a flu bug."

  She looked at him dubiously, but marched to her room, retrieved aspirin, and returned with a glass of water. Jack swallowed the pills, his face hidden in the shadows.

  "You're frightening me, Jack. What's wrong with you?"

  "I'll be fine," he mumbled, and as if to prove it, he stumbled toward the bed, stripped off his sweats, and lay down on top of the covers.

  She saw only a distinct outline of his form, the shadows of chest and groin, but enough to know he was naked. The not-so-subtle hint meant he'd already withdrawn. Anything she said now would fall on deaf ears. Since his arrival, she'd seen Jack shut down like this – the hooded eyes, the step backwards even when no movement took place as he erected an impenetrable wall between them.

  A moment later she closed the door between their rooms.

  Jack stretched out on the bed, his arms and legs flung wide. The crisp chill of the room whirled around his burning body. The aspirin began to reduce the heat, but it couldn't slow down his adrenaline. Close. He sensed how close he'd come to harming her. Lust and desire, rage and energy set his nerves thrumming like crazed violins. Skewed his moral center and strangled clear thinking.

  What was happening to him? His preternatural powers were out of whack. What had started as a small blip after Africa had gone wild since he'd been around Olivia. Like something stronger, more vicious – more immediate – had been unleashed. Years ago he'd promised to protect Livvie from her stepfather. He'd kept that promise, but at a price she'd never known, couldn't begin to guess. Now he'd put her in danger again.

  Relenting, he stumbled to the closet, retrieved his duffle bag, and removed the packet of Phens. He popped several into his mouth, hoping they'd control whatever darkness struggled to get out of him. He added two blue tablets and lay down to wait for their magic to work.

  An hour later his body temp had returned to normal, his heart rate steadied, and his respiration slowed. But the sound of Olivia's frightened voice still rang in his mind. He stifled an invective, pulled on the sweats, and opened the connecting door between their rooms. She hadn't locked it against him. What did that mean?

  Olivia sat on her bed, vacillated between going to Jack again and locking the connecting door between their rooms. She stared at it, trying to imagine what was happening on the other side, trying to process the events of the last several hours. Whoever – whatever – was in the other room wasn't the Jack she knew. Didn't sound like him, didn't look like him. She let out a shudder and pulled the spread over her bare legs.

  Suddenly, she froze, hearing the faint scratching from the other side of the wooden barrier. She waited. Silence.

  More scratching and then Jack's voice. "Livvie, I'm sorry."

  He sounded normal, didn't he? Olivia didn't trust her own ears. Was she fooling herself because she wanted him to be okay? Wanted to fling open the door, wanted to hold him, just hold him tight.

  "Livvie, are you awake? Are you all right?"

  Her mouth was a swollen tongue wrapped in cotton. She wet her lips to speak, but the words stuck in her throat. The door swung slowly open.

  She eyed Jack cautiously as he stood endless moments in the door frame. A line of downy fur ran from the middle of his chest to disappear beneath low slung gray sweats. He gripped either side of the door jamb as if he held himself there by sheer will. She shivered and waited, fists clutched tightly at her thighs. Her breathing stuttered erratically and a wave of lightheadedness enveloped her.

  Long moments passed. She didn't dare speak, afraid she'd send him back to the dark place where he couldn't or wouldn't take her.

  His eyes bored holes into her. "I never intended to scare you," he whispered. "I didn't want you to see me like that."

  She exhaled on a ragged sigh. "I was worried, not frightened."

  He made an impatient gesture. "God knows, I haven't made good on my promises in the past, but I swear it'll never happen again."

  "I want to help, Jack. I want you to tell me – "

  He held up his hand, warding off her words. "You don't understand, Livvie. It's… dangerous."

  She swung her legs to the floor. He backed up, his hands held palms outward as if to keep her at bay. "Dangerous?" She approached him, frowning. "You've said that before, but it doesn't make any sense."

  "It's all the sense I can make."

  She stopped a few feet from him. She wasn't going to let Jack off the hook so easily. Not this time. "Don't you think you owe me an explanation?"

  "Probably. But I can't give
one. Not now."

  Suddenly she decided she didn't want to hear complicated explanations after all. What she wanted was to live in the here and now. In this moment with Jack, regardless of what'd happened years before or what happened afterward. The single truth remaining after all these years was that she still wanted him. She didn't fully understand him, she was a little afraid of him despite her proclamations, but she still wanted him. That need obscured everything else.

  She placed her hands on his chest, fingered the crisp hair and the solid mass of muscles beneath.

  "Livvie," he groaned, holding her at arm's length while he breathed heavily and stared at her with questioning eyes.

  Smoothing her hands up and down the taut flesh of his upper body, she wrapped them around his waist and slid them up his back. The muscles tightened beneath her hands and the vein at his neck pounded desperately. Suddenly she felt the wrenching surge of sexual confidence. Jack had come to her room for no other reason than this.

  He wanted her.

  She stood on tiptoes and placed a gentle kiss beneath his jaw. He lowered his head so she could feather tiny kisses across his high cheekbones, the gray specks at his temples, the tiny scar at the corner of his upper lip. His large hands wrapped around her waist and moved downward to grip her hips, pressing them into his groin. Naked beneath her shorts, she was aware of the huge swell of him through the thin material.

  While he lifted her up as if she weighed nothing, she wrapped her legs around his waist. His lips covered hers, his tongue thrusting possessively into the soft folds of her mouth. The intensity of the kiss increased as he sucked, bit, urged her on, and she responded as fire danced in her veins. She gripped his thick, dark hair in her fists, pressed his face into her breasts.

  Impatient, he shoved up her tee shirt and teased one breast with his mouth, circling with his tongue until she was mindless with desire. Until she was damp between her thighs and insane with the need to feel him inside her.

  "Jack, Jack, now."

  She tried to reach down and touch him, but he shoved her hand aside. Control slipped away as his strong fingers moved beneath her shorts, surprisingly gentle when they caressed and stroked her, urged her to a frenetic peak until she clamped down on her bottom lip to keep from screaming out. He fastened his mouth to her nipple and suckled while his clever fingers worked their magic between her thighs. She rode the tide of passion that swept her higher and higher to a shuddering peak that drove her over the edge to oblivion.

  When she came, it was hard and fast. She throbbed urgently and clung to him for dear life, every muscle in her body straining with each delicious wave. She wanted the thick stretch of him inside her and he accommodated with his long fingers, gripping her tightly as she climaxed around him in shattering, throbbing pulses.

  Olivia didn't know what she'd expected from Jack, but certainly not this heart-skittering, mindless pleasure. They collapsed side by side on the bed, his labored breathing matched hers, and their skin slicked wetly with the heavy sheen of sex. Still fluttery and languid from the force of their passion, she folded her body into his, eager for more. For cuddling, for tenderness, for words murmured in the dark. And because she felt his hard erection against her side, for the inevitable release of his desire.

  But with a calm she was sure masked lust, he pulled her tee-shirt down over her breasts, adjusted her shorts, and traced a finger from her lips to the juncture of her breasts.

  "Sleep with me tonight," she whispered, feeling the steady thumping of his heart beneath her hand.

  He shook his head sadly a moment while icy stone settled in the place where her heart should be. "I can't, Livvie."

  "I don't understand."

  "I can't be with you until this mess of a case is settled, until it's over and done with."

  She trailed her lips softly along the fingers that caressed her neck. "Why? Am I that much of a distraction?"

  "Hell, yes," he moaned and kissed her hard on the lips for a long moment. Then he broke off and held her by the shoulders. "But that's not the problem, Squirt. There are things I have to tell you. Confessions I have to make."

  The long-ago nickname warmed her. "I don't care about – "

  "Shush." He placed his fingers over her mouth. "Trust me, Livvie. I can't be with you completely until you know everything, where I've been, what I've done, what I'm dangerously close to becoming." He added with a bitter laugh, "What I'm scared shitless I can't control."

  "Then tell me," she urged, nestling closer. "Tell me now."

  Although indecision crossed his face, he answered with a tone of firmness and a voice full of regret. "No. I have to wait until this DLK thing is finished."

  His lips against her forehead were feathery soft. He pushed off the bed, still wearing his sweats, his erection outlined clearly beneath the fabric. He'd pleasured her, but not taken care of his own needs. Why?

  "Why didn't you… I know you want to."

  His face darkened and turned hard. "Getting close to me is lethal, Olivia. I may not be able to control myself. It's dangerous for you, me… for both of us."

  She remembered the barely contained aggression he'd shown their first time together. This time had been skillful, but ardent with an underlying intensity she'd come to associate with him. Was she responsible? Did she bring out something dark in him? Was that why Jack fought being with her?

  With a crooked smile he looked back for a second, then closed the door firmly behind him, and left her alone. She heard the firm click of the lock that signaled he'd closed her out. His withdrawal was a cramp deep in her very center. She wrapped her arms around herself and stared a long time at the spot where Jack's head had dented the pillow beside her. He'd called her Squirt and then left. She had an aching sense of déjà vu.

  *

  At 7:45 the next morning Jack walked into the hall and knocked on Olivia's door. After last night the connecting passage between their rooms seemed too intimate to use. He needed to put their relationship back on a professional level. He rapped again while balancing several coffees in one hand.

  When Olivia opened the door, she was dressed, packed and ready to leave. "Thanks," she said, her gazed aimed at a spot on his shirt.

  "I thought we'd get an early start," he explained.

  "Sure, no problem. I have an afternoon class anyway."

  "No," he said, "actually you don't."

  "What do you mean?"

  "I've arranged for someone to fill in for you."

  The brilliant eyes he admired flashed like green fire. "You got someone to fill in for me?" Her lips thinned and a tiny muscle in her jaw tightened. "How thoughtful. Is there any other rearrangement of my life you'd like to make?"

  Good, he thought. He liked her anger better than her disappointment. "I know you don't like it – "

  "Hate it," she interrupted.

  "Hate it," he corrected, "but it's not practical for you to carry on with your full teaching load while you assist with the case." He eyed her stiff back as she sat at the desk sipping her coffee. "If you want to back out… "

  "Not on your life," she said between clenched teeth.

  She finished the coffee, left a few bills for house cleaning, and wheeled her luggage out the door. She waited for him by the elevator. "I've already checked out."

  "Good. Let's get going then."

  They traveled down to the parking garage in silence. "A deputy delivered the car early this morning." Jack unlocked the trunk and stowed their luggage.

  For the first hour on the drive back to Sacramento they seldom spoke and when they did, they tap danced around the real issue. He didn't blame her for being angry. He'd opened a door for her and then slammed it in her face. She had every right to be furious with him. He hadn't explained a damn thing about his life during the past seventeen years. Given her no inkling of his true nature. Of the violence he'd committed. Or the blood on his hands.

  The call from Slater came just as Jack dropped Olivia off at the university to retrieve
her car. After a short exchange, Jack disconnected. "There's been a new development."

  Olivia flung a startled glance his way as if she'd been deep in thought on another matter. "What? What development?"

  "Another death. Get your stuff settled here and at home and meet us at the court house," he instructed. "I'll get there as soon as I can. ADA Torres and I are interviewing Diego Vargas this morning." He hesitated. "A woman's body was found in the lions' habitat at Samuel Brannan Zoo."

  "My God," she whispered.

  He took in her shocked expression and pale face. "You know the place?"

  "It's around the corner from my house."

  Chapter Sixteen

  Jack’s federal badge easily got him into the Bigler County District Attorney's Offices, a brand-new building where he took the elevator to the fourth floor. He stood at the entrance to a conference room where Isabella Torres sat in one of several cushy chairs around the table, waiting for the meet with Councilman Diego Vargas.

  "Got a minute?" Jack asked, standing in the doorway. He quickly filled her in on the death of the young woman at the zoo, the latest one in the DLK case.

  Shock registered in Torres' dark eyes. "So soon?"

  He nodded.

  "Still, it could've been an accident," she suggested after a moment. "The girl slipped and fell over the railing?"

  "You don't believe that."

  He watched her cover her eyes with her hand as he stepped into the room. "Another thing."

  She looked up, checked her watch. "You’ll have to make it quick, Agent Holt."

  "Jackson," he corrected, smiling. "Here's the deal. When you interview Vargas, I don't want you to mention the hookers from Maidu."

  After a long pause she said, "What do you know about my interviewee and why shouldn’t I ask him about the prostitutes?"

  "Vargas could be involved in my case, and if he is, I don’t want to give him a heads up." "That’s ridiculous. I'm looking at Vargas for domestic violence."

  "Ah, but Sac County's investigating for campaign fraud and there's some other stuff, right, some of it pretty kinky? Wouldn't you like to get a wire tap on him?"