The Battle Within

by LaShawn Vasser

  Vicky smiled warmly, “Hi, can I help you?”

  He could see how Jason would instantly fall in love with those eyes. They were the most alluring, captivating pair of brown he’d ever seen.

  A moment later, Jason came up behind her and opened the door wider, “Baby, I’ve got it.” He reached out and pulled him inside and into a bear hug. “I thought I heard your voice. Man, it’s good to see you. I couldn’t believe when you called this morning and told me you were in town.”

  “I just got in yesterday afternoon. I needed a vacation and hadn’t seen Franklin in too long. So, here I am.”

  “Well, again it’s good to see you. Let me introduce you to my wife. Vicky this is Troy Erickson, Franklin’s brother. Troy, this is my wife, Vicky.”

  Surprised was an understatement, she’d known Franklin for over two years and had no idea he had a brother. He didn’t look anything like Franklin or Franklin’s father, Mr. Roth. But, then he smiled. There it was that smile. It was exactly the same. Only Troy’s seemed to be much more readily available whereas, it was a rarely seen gift with Franklin.

  She extended her hand, “It’s so nice to meet you.”

  “You are even more beautiful in person. And, I’m pleased to meet you as well.”

  “Hey…I know that look. It’s the same one I had when I met her. Just remember, she’s married to me.” Jason said jokingly as he possessively pulled her into his embrace.

  Loving every minute of his possessiveness, Vicky grinned, “Thank you, Troy. I’m going to go check on this kids. It was a pleasure to meet you.”

  He responded in a fun-loving but flirty kind of way, “Dr. Troy….just thought I’d throw that out there if for some reason you decide to leave this guy. It’s always good to have a doctor in the family.”

  Firmly and knowingly, Jason stated, “Not a chance in hell of that happening. Come on, let’s go into my study.”

  “Can I just say WOW? You are a lucky man. Vicky seems beautiful inside and out. I can totally see why she turned your world upside down.”

  “That she did. Anyway…enough fawning over my wife. What brings you here? I heard concern in your voice this morning or did I hear it wrong?”

  Troy sighed, “No. You read it exactly right. I wanted to talk to you about Franklin. He has no idea I’m here, and I want to keep it that way.”

  Jason nodded as Troy continued, “Have you noticed anything…mildly off or different with him lately?”

  Jason scratched his chin, “Honestly, things have been so crazy around here with the new baby, and I can’t say that I have. Why?”

  Troy folded his arms across his chest, “You know how calm Franklin usually is right? Well, last night something happened that caused him to get so upset that he…” He rubbed his forehead, “He punched his bathroom mirror so hard it shattered. He ended up needing quite a few stitches and sprained his hand.”

  “Franklin? What…why?!”

  “He won’t talk to me. That’s why I’m here. I was hoping that maybe he had talked to you about whatever is going on with him. I’ve only been in town since yesterday, but I can already tell his mind has been more than pre-occupied. Do you think maybe Matthew or my mother’s ghosts might be reappearing?”

  “It’s possible, but I doubt it. Franklin and his dad seemed to have ironed out all of those demons from the past a long time ago. But, now that you mention it, I did run into him at the gym last week. He’s always been a gym rat, but his intensity on the bag made me ask if something was wrong. He said he’d figure it out.”

  “Figure what out?”

  “I’m not sure. I didn’t press him too hard because he asked me to back off. But, if he got upset enough to need stitches, maybe I shouldn’t have.”

  Troy had a hard time debating what to share and what not to share with Jason. He didn’t want to unintentionally betray his brother. But, he knew if anyone had a clue as to what was going on or even how to help, it would be Jason. He went on, “I’m not sure if you’re aware of this but when Franklin was younger, he would have these…episodes where he would kind of freak out for no apparent reason. He’d sometimes see and hear things that…well, nobody else did. It stopped when we were in our teens.”

  Jason was slow to respond, “Yeah…I remember some of those. He had a few at the boarding school we attended.”

  “Well, I think they might have returned. He had one last night. He doesn’t know I heard him…but I did. Jason, I believe Franklin’s in trouble. I found a ridiculous amount of prescription medication in his bathroom. If I didn’t know any better, it would be easy to assume that he’s formed a drug addiction.” Frustrated, Troy ran his hand across his face, “Or, even worse, something else could be going on. I’m not sure if he’ll open up to me. He’s closer to you. Maybe you can find out what is really going on?”

  There was no way Franklin was addicted to drugs. But, he’d known Franklin had been having a hard time of things lately. “You know he’s never been good with change, and he’s had a lot of it over the last couple of years. From his engagement to April, their breakup, Sandy, their breakup, getting back together with April, basically managing CkR during all the drama of my life, and moving from Minnesota to Atlanta.”

  Jason sighed, “He’s had a lot on his plate. I’ve tried to get him to let me delegate some of his responsibilities, but you how he is. I think it’s time for me to not leave him any options. I’ll talk to him.”

  “I take it you don’t care much for April?”

  “No, I’m not even going to sugar coat it. I don’t. She just broke off their engagement, which to be perfectly honest, was probably the best thing that could have ever happened. He’d started to move on with a good friend of mine, and then she showed up disrupting that relationship. As far as I know, April has never offered up any reasonable explanation for why one day…she couldn’t wait to start her life with him, her words not mine. To all of a sudden, I just can’t do this. She comes across as very manipulative, but Franklin doesn’t see it.”

  “I get the same vibe you do. On the few occasions we’ve been in the same room, we haven’t managed to be able to get along. You know me…I’m easy. I can get along with almost anybody, but she is something else. She really threw Franklin for a loop with breaking their engagement. I can’t believe after that fiasco that he would even consider taking her back.” Troy shook his head, “Although I’ve never met Sandy, and they only dated briefly, I’d never seen him more…happy or at ease. She was good for him. No chance of them reconciling, huh?”

  “No. I think that shipped has sailed. She’s engaged to be married in several weeks.”

  “Damn shame. Anyway…I hate to rush off, but I’d better get back and make sure Franklin’s doing what he’s supposed to. Come by when you get a chance.”

  “You can count on it.”

  Chapter 9

  Franklin thought with Troy out of the house, it might be a good opportunity to call Dr. Caprice. Last night had scared the crap out of him, and he was more than a bit nervous. Was his condition deteriorating already?

  He picked up the phone and dialed her number.

  “Dr. Leslie Caprice’s office, this is Char, how may I help you?”

  “Hello. This is Franklin Roth; I need to speak with Dr. Caprice immediately.”

  “She’s with a client.”

  “Does she have any availability for today?”

  “Do you mind if I put you on hold while I check?”

  He sighed, “Sure.”

  Char came back on the line. “She just had a cancelation. Can you be here at 2 PM?”

  Franklin looked at his watch, “That’s a little over two hours? Yes. I should be able to make that.”

  “Great. I’ll put you on the schedule for 2 PM this afternoon, Mr. Roth. We’ll see you then.”

  “Thanks.”

  As soon as Franklin disconnected the call, another one came through.

  “Hello.” He answered.

  “My goodness…he lives.
”

  “Yes, dad, I live.”

  “One never knows since the only time Camille and I can hear from you is when we call.”

  “Yeah…well, now is not a good time to talk either.”

  “I know…I know. You’re busy. So, I’ll make it quick. Camille is making dinner tomorrow night and wanted me to ask if you and April could come over.”

  Sounding more exhausted than he actually felt, Franklin responded, “April’s out of town at a convention.”

  “You know it’s okay to come over sometimes without her.”

  His father must have had him on speaker because Camille chimed into the conversation, “Please, Franklin. I haven’t seen you in a while, and a mother needs to see her son every now and again.”

  “Mom, Troy’s in town. I don’t want to leave him here alone.”

  There was a long pause on the other end. Her voice was strained, “Then bring him. It’ll be fun.”

  Matthew and Franklin spoke at the same time, “Fun?”

  Franklin continued, “I’m sure if I brought him, dinner would be a lot of things but I’m not so sure fun would be one of them.”

  “Oh come on. We’re all adults. He’s invited. Please come. Dinner is at five o’clock.”

  Franklin had never been good at telling Camille no. He was sure that was why his father had her on speaker phone for back-up. “I’ll talk to him and let you know.”

  “Fair enough.”

  After they disconnected the call, all Franklin wanted to do was crawl back into the bed, throw the covers over his head and sleep.

  *****

  Franklin talked to Troy about his parent’s invitation just before he left for his appointment.

  Troy was hesitant, “I don’t know about this Franklin. Having dinner with Camille and your father might not be such a good idea.”

  “It’s just dinner, Troy.”

  Troy didn’t know about that. He was his mother’s twin. Matthew Roth was always more than a little bit uncomfortable the few times they were in the same room.

  He was pretty sure, looking into Troy’s face was a harsh reminder of an ugly time in his. And, to be honest, Troy wasn’t that excited to see the man’s face who drank uncontrollably then beat his mother, sometimes until she was unconscious.

  Franklin didn’t really understand what he was asking of him, or how difficult it would be to sit in the same room with Matthew. However, he would go. He would go to this dinner because of his concern for Franklin. He needed to observe that interaction. Troy’s gut was telling him that Franklin was in a crisis.

  Especially, after snooping around in his medicine cabinet, the medications he’d found had Troy extremely worried. But, the one positive was that he’d been able to get the name of his psychiatrist. He’d thought about calling her. However, if he did, that might cause Franklin to shut down completely if he ever found out.

  For now, maybe this dinner with Matthew and Camille, might be his best chance to get a better handle on the situation.

  “Fine, I’ll go. But, I’m not wearing some monkey suit. If I go, I’m wearing jeans, a Metallica t-shirt, and some flip flops.”

  Franklin smirked, “Does it have to be Metallica?”

  *****

  Franklin was exhausted when he pulled up into his driveway. Seeing Dr. Caprice always took a lot out of him. But, the last hour or so, was more intense than usual.

  “Damn.” Jason’s car was outside. He wasn’t in the right frame of mind to deal with him this evening.

  Franklin got out of his car and walked into the house. He could hear Jason and Troy in the recreational room shooting pool.

  They seem to be laughing and having a good time.

  “Let me show you how it’s done, young son.”

  “If I remember correctly, you sucked at pool.”

  Jason laughed, “No that was Franklin.”

  “Hey, I can hear you both, and it wasn’t me. I think my little bro had it right. Jason, you’re good at a great many things, but pool, not so much.”

  They turned to see Franklin standing in the door at the same time. Troy knew the real reason Jason had come over for a visit, so he wasted no time making himself scarce, “Hey, I need a beer. Anybody else want one?”

  Franklin waved him off, “No, I'm fine. Jason?”

  “You know what…I think I’d prefer a bottled water. I know I’ll be on first shift tonight with the baby, so I better take it easy.”

  Troy shook his head as he walked out of the room, “Kids…they change everything.”

  Jason yelled behind him, “For the better my friend!” He also zeroed in on his hand. Pointing to it, he asked, “What happened?”

  “I was in the bathroom and hit it. Messed around and shattered the mirror in there. Had to get a few stitches and sprained it.”

  “It looks like it hurt like hell. I know you’re pretty good with your hands. Was that an accident or accidentally on purpose?”

  “You’ve been talking to Troy.”

  “I’ve got eyes, Franklin. I know something is going on. You’re carrying it all over your face and body. Don’t get me wrong, you’ve always been moody, but you’ve been brooding more so than usual. You told me at the gym last week, you’d figure it out. Have you? Talk to me. Tell me what’s going on?”

  Franklin wasn’t ready. He just wasn’t prepared to tell Jason or anyone about his disease. “Look, I’m not going to lie, there is a shitload of stuff going on in my life right now, but I’m just not ready to discuss it. But, I promise, you’ll be one of the first to know when I am ready.”

  Jason nodded, “Fair enough. But, what I am going to do, is delegate some of your workload. You’ve been doing both my job and yours for a while now.”

  His natural inclination was to tell Jason no that he could handle it, but Franklin just didn’t have the energy. He didn’t offer any pushback. He just shrugged, “That might not be a bad idea.”

  This response was so unlike him. “You know that you can count on me whatever is going on right?”

  He gave him a half smile, “I know it.” They bumped fist with his good hand, “I hate to be rude, but I’m just going to take something for the pain for my hand and head up to bed. I’m pretty exhausted. Stay, eat some food, and visit with Troy.”

  “I’ll definitely do that.”

  Franklin turned and walked out of the room.

  Before Jason was concerned, now he was worried.

  *****

  Franklin and Troy stood outside waiting for someone to open the door. Troy was fidgety.

  “Would you stop squirming?”

  “I’m not squirming.”

  The door opened.

  There stood, Camille Roth smiling broadly, “Matthew….they’re here!” She was around the same age as Miriam Rutherford, but that’s where the similarities ended. Miriam could have been a former super-model, with her height, beauty, and style. Camille Roth was the exact opposite.

  Troy was more than a little surprised because Camille was also the exact opposite of his mother too. He’d expected Matthew to have re-married someone that resembled a Barbie doll. Not this very petite woman with delicate and unassuming features. Who wore her reddish brown hair in a short pixie cut with bangs and opted not to color the gray in it.

  There was such a warmth in her smile. The softness in her eyes couldn’t be hidden behind her wire-rimmed glasses or the crow’s feet around them. She was soothing and disarming, and he hadn’t even said hello.

  Given Camille wore a pair of khaki pants and a pink button up with a pair of loafers, Troy liked her already and could understand exactly why Franklin was so taken in by her.

  Camille looked at Troy and winked, “I love your t-shirt.”

  There was also something a little impish behind the twinkle in her eyes. Maybe just maybe tonight wouldn’t be so bad.

  Troy felt like a school boy, “Thank you. I’m Troy it’s very nice to meet you.” He handed her a small bouquet of Irises.

  “
It’s very nice to meet you as well.”

  Franklin leaned in and kissed her on the cheek, “Hello, mom. It’s good to see you.”

  She hugged him tight, “Come on inside. We can’t stand here on the doorstep all night.”

  Camille ushered them in and Troy looked around. It was nothing like he’d imagined. It was a modest ranch style home. Almost something like he would have purchased for himself.

  “So, this is where you grew up?”

  Franklin nodded, “Yep, this is where I grew up.”

  Matthew Roth came around the corner from his library. He was different from how Troy remembered him.

  Didn’t he use to be taller? He wasn’t a short man, but he, and Franklin now stood taller than him. And, didn’t he used to be thinner too? Mr. Roth wasn’t heavy, but he’d definitely put on some weight. Maybe that was why he looked shorter. He kept his dark hair cut short like Franklin’s only he was graying along the sides.

  He had a strong square jaw just like Franklin and those dark eyes that held many secrets, just like Franklin. If people saw him as his mother’s twin, then they definitely saw Franklin’s father as an older version of him.

  Matthews thunderous voice rang out, “Franklin, I’m glad you could make it.” Then, he turned to Troy and swallowed deeply, as he looked into the face of his ex-wife. He cleared his throat and extended his hand, “Troy Erickson right? It’s…um…really good to see you again. Haven’t seen you in quite a few years.”

  Troy didn’t want to shake his hand. He’d rather punch him in the face. Matthew Roth scarred both his mother and Franklin. The two most important people in his world. But, he was here for Franklin, so he’d have to tamper down those emotions.

  He shook his hand, “Mr. Roth.”

  Camille clapped both of her hands together, “This is wonderful! Dinner is ready so let’s all go sit down, eat and catch up.”

  The first hour of dinner went well. They talked about current events, business, and anything that wouldn’t lead them to politics or anything personal.

  Troy mostly addressed Franklin and Camille. Since, both he and Matthew seemed to take great pains in avoiding each other.