Going on Red

by Lyn Gardner

  “I know.”

  “You know what?”

  “That she wasn’t your first.”

  Devon’s eyes turned to slits. “How in the hell would you know that?”

  “Because I’m your sister, and I watched you grow up. You never had any boyfriends other than poor Charlie, and a few years ago, when I was on a call, I noticed you in a coffee shop across the street. I went over just to say hello and saw you with a woman. You were holding hands…and she was wearing one of your shirts.”

  “Shit,” Devon said, resting against the pillows behind her back. “Why didn’t you ever say anything?”

  “I kept thinking you’d trust me enough to tell me the truth,” Kate said softly. “It kind of hurt that you didn’t.”

  “I’m sorry,” Devon said, reaching for her sister’s hand. “I was just so scared of losing you.”

  “That’s never going to happen,” Kate said, giving Devon’s hand a squeeze. “Dev, you’re my sister, and I love you. I always have, and I always will. That’s never going to change. I promise.”

  Devon’s eyes shimmered with tears. “I love you, too, Kate.”

  For a few moments, the room grew quiet until muffled shouting from the flat next door came through the walls. Kate frowned. “You seriously need to move out of this place.”

  “It’s all I can afford at the moment, and it’s not that bad.”

  “You have five bloody locks on the door.”

  “It’s called being safety conscious.”

  “It’s called drug deals and burglaries, both of which have gone down in this building too many times.”

  “Please don’t start,” Devon said, tossing another tissue aside. “We’ve been over this before. Once I manage to put away some money, I’ll find a new place, and before you bring it up—again—I’m not moving in with you.”

  “Why not?”

  “Kate, do you remember when we had to share a room when Mum decided she was going to paint yours?”

  “Yeah. So?”

  “So, we almost killed each other.”

  “We did not—”

  “Oh, come on, Kate. I came home from school to find you had rearranged all my stuff down to reorganizing the drawers in my dresser, and you tossed out some of my favorite clothes. It was a nightmare.”

  “Those clothes were faded and tattered.”

  “And I didn’t care. They were comfortable,” Devon said, sitting up a bit. “Kate, like I just said, I love you. I love you to death, but you like structure, and I like…I like being able to kick off my shoes when I walk in the door. I like putting a bottle of spice away without thinking where it falls in the alphabet, and I like…and I like drinking milk out of the container instead of a glass.”

  Kate curled her lip. “You do that?”

  “See,” Devon said, giggling as she slapped her hands on the mattress.

  “I suppose you’re right,” Kate said, letting out a long breath. “I am pretty controlling at times, huh?”

  “You’re just you, Kate,” Devon said, taking Kate’s hand. “And I promise, once I get enough saved, I’ll move out of here. Until then, the door will remain locked, and I’ll keep this copper I know on speed dial…just in case.” Okay?”

  “All right.” Kate got up and began gathering the balled-up tissues that were scattered all over the bed. “Now, eat your soup. I’m going to throw these out and tidy up the kitchen.”

  “Wait,” Devon said, grabbing Kate’s hand again. “Don’t go just yet.”

  “Why?”

  “Because two wrongs don’t make a right.”

  Kate’s brow furrowed. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It was wrong of me to not tell you I was gay, which makes what you’re doing equally as wrong.”

  “I don’t follow you.”

  “Talk to me about Brodie.”

  “There’s nothing to talk about,” Kate said, snatching her hand away. “Drop it.”

  “Kate, talk to me. Let it out. I know you want to.”

  “There is nothing to let out,” Kate said, walking away.

  “It’s okay if you like her.”

  “No, it’s not!” Kate said, whipping around. “I shouldn’t feel this way. I don’t want to feel this way. This isn’t what I want, Devon. This isn’t what I planned.”

  “Plans change.”

  “Oh, don’t give me that crap,” Kate said, going back over to the bed. “This isn’t about buying a red car instead of a blue one. It’s about…it’s about…”

  Devon tried to hide her grin. After stopping mid-sentence, Kate was staring at Devon as if she expected her to interject. Devon chuckled. “Oh, don’t look at me. I’ve already done my confession for the day.”

  “I don’t think I want to talk about this,” Kate said, turning to leave.

  Devon grabbed Kate by the sleeve and forced her to sit down. “Yes, you do.”

  “No, I—”

  “I’ve been where you are. Don’t you get that? I’ve been in your shoes, and right now, you don’t just need to talk about it. You have to talk about it,” Devon said, sitting up. “Kate, you need to get this off your chest and out of your head, or it’s going to eat you alive.”

  Kate bowed her head. “Devon, I can’t.”

  “Do you like her?”

  “Please, Dev—”

  “Do you like her?”

  “Yes!” Kate snapped. “Yes, I like her. All right? Is that what you want to hear?”

  “Do you want to be with her?”

  “I don’t know what that means?”

  “Yes, you do,” Devon said, whimsy dancing in her eyes. “Because it’s probably all you’ve been thinking about for weeks.”

  Kate’s nostrils flared, and she jumped off the bed. “You need to mind your own fucking business!”

  Even with a stuffed up head and feeling as if she was in the Sahara, the sight and sound of her sister’s temper caused Devon to laugh out loud. “Oh, by that outburst, I’d have to say I guessed correctly.”

  Over the years, like most siblings do, Devon and Kate had had their fair share of arguments, yet the ability to stay angry with her sister for longer than a few minutes had always escaped Kate, and it still did. The sound of Devon’s girly titters warmed Kate’s heart, and with a huff, she sat back down and swatted Devon’s leg. “You’re a pain in the arse. Do you know that?”

  “Yeah, but you love me.”

  “I have absolutely no idea why.”

  Devon’s smile lit up the room. “Probably because we’re sisters and apparently, in more ways than one.”

  Kate pursed her lips. “This isn’t funny.”

  “No, but it’s true. Isn’t it?”

  Kate sighed. She’d been riding an emotional roller-coaster for weeks, and the ride needed to stop. She wasn’t eating. She wasn’t sleeping, and the more she thought about Brodie, the angrier she got. Kate didn’t want to feel this way. She didn’t want to dream about a woman with dark brown eyes or wake up out of breath with her body craving for release. Kate needed to take back control of her life, and the sooner, the better.

  “You know what’s true,” Kate said, looking Devon in the eye. “What’s true is that I’ve never been attracted to a woman before, so this whole bloody thing is just in my head. It’s a stupid crush, and next week I’m going to tell Brodie I won’t be joining her for dinner anymore. All I need to do is put some distance between us, and I’ll be fine. She can go back to clubbing and fucking random women, and I’ll find a nice man, get married, and have a few kids. That’s what I’ve always wanted, and that’s something Brodie Shaw can’t give me.”

  Devon studied her sister. “Okay, but if you’re so serious about this, why not just tell her tonight and get it over with. Why wait a week?”

  “Because she’s going out of town today, so we aren’t meeting for dinner tonight.”

  “Oh, crap.” Devon grabbed her phone from the nightstand, and looking at the time, she hurried to move the tray
off her lap. “Kate, take this.”

  “What the hell are you doing? You haven’t finished your soup.”

  “I’ve got to get dressed,” Devon said, tossing aside the blanket.

  “Dressed? Devon, you’re sick. You need to stay in bed.”

  “I’m fine.” Devon scrambled out of bed and made it halfway to the bathroom before the pounding in her head caused her to stop. Leaning against the dresser, she closed her eyes and waited for the ache to ease.

  “No, you’re not,” Kate said, guiding her sister back to bed. “And what’s all this about anyway?”

  Devon sunk onto the mattress. “I’m supposed to be going out of town with Brodie today.”

  “Well, I’m sure her clients will understand.”

  “Oh, it’s not for work.”

  “It’s not?” Kate said, tucking the blanket around Devon.

  “No, I’m her date.”

  Kate stood straight and parked her hands on her hips. “You’re her what?”

  Devon blanched. “Please stop yelling. It hurts my head.”

  “I’m sorry,” Kate said, her expression softening as she placed her hand on Devon’s forehead. “You’re really hot.”

  “I know, and I feel like shit, but Brodie’s going to be here in less than two hours, and I haven’t even packed.”

  “And you’re not going to because you’re not going anywhere.”

  “Kate, I have to. I promised to be her date for the weekend.”

  “Okay, that’s the second time you’ve used that word, so would you care to explain date?”

  The coolness of Kate’s tone wasn’t lost on Devon, and she held up her hands. “Relax, sis. It’s just make-believe.”

  “Make-believe?”

  “Yes, as in not real,” Devon said, resting back against a stack of pillows. “Her father’s birthday is tomorrow, and they’re having a big party to celebrate. Brodie loves her family, but every time she goes home, her brothers and father try to fix her up with someone. They end up having a house filled with single women, most of whom are either too old or totally straight, and Brodie ends up having a horrid time. So, this time, Brodie thought if she brought someone with her, they’d stop trying to be matchmakers, and she could enjoy herself.” When Kate arched an eyebrow, Devon held up her hand. “In name only, I swear.”

  “Of course,” Kate said quietly. “Well, you’d best call her and tell her you’re not going.”

  “Kate, I don’t want to let her down. She’s been looking forward to this for weeks.”

  “Devon, you’re sick. Now, pick up the bloody phone and tell her you’re not going. She’ll just have to find someone else.”

  ***

  Brodie glanced at her watch, and delighted to see she was on still on schedule after hitting every red light between her home and Devon’s, she trotted up the stairs. Ever since Devon had agreed to the charade, Brodie had been counting the days until she saw her family. Since her brother, Ethan, ran the construction side of her business, it was rare a week would go by without her touching base with him, but she hadn’t seen the others since Christmas. With her face bright and her smile wide, Brodie lightly rapped on the door and waited for her salvation to appear.

  A second later, Brodie heard the latch click, and when the door opened, Brodie’s mouth did, too. “Kate?”

  “Hiya, Brodie.”

  “What are you doing here?”

  “Can’t a girl visit her sister?”

  “What? Oh right, of course,” Brodie mumbled. “I just wasn’t expecting to see you today.”

  “That’s not all you weren’t expecting,” Kate said under her breath as Brodie walked into the flat.

  Brodie hadn’t told Kate anything about her plans for the weekend. It didn’t seem like a good idea to let her know her supposedly straight sister would be portraying Brodie’s girlfriend for a few days, and it still didn’t. An uncomfortable silence fell over the room until Brodie said, “Um…is Cassidy…I mean, Devon around? She was going to do me a favor—”

  “Brodie, I’m your date.”

  “Sorry?”

  “Devon’s got a cold, so I volunteered to take her place for the weekend.”

  Ever since their dance at Outskirts, all Brodie had done was think about her relationship, or rather her friendship with Kate Monroe. Forefront in her mind was how she had felt when Kate didn’t show up at Calabria that night, and after a few days of being dogged with that memory, Brodie faced facts. She was on a dead-end street, and it was time to turn around. She hadn’t looked at another woman in weeks and allowing Kate to remain in her life, if only for Friday night dinners, wasn’t going to work. If Brodie wanted Kate out of her heart, she needed to get her out of her life.

  “I’m sure you mean well, Kate, but my family is expecting…well, I told them I was bringing someone…um…someone special.”

  “And you don’t think I’ll pass the test?”

  “What? No. No, that’s not what I meant. It’s just that I asked Devon because she’s…” The words died in Brodie’s throat. Disclosing that Devon was a lesbian wasn’t an option and open-mouthed, Brodie could do nothing but stare back at Kate.

  Kate snickered at the befuddled look on Brodie’s face. She had never seen the woman flustered before, and it was a nice change of pace. “I’ll meet you at the car,” she said, picking up her suitcase. “And Devon’s in the bedroom if you want to say goodbye.”

  As soon as the door latched, Brodie let out a long breath before heading to the bedroom to peek inside. “Hey there.”

  “Hey yourself,” Devon said, tossing aside a crumpled tissue.

  “You look like shit.”

  “Gee, thanks.”

  “And looking as bad as you do, I’m surprised Kate would want to leave you alone,” Brodie said, stepping into the room.

  “I won’t be. Gina’s coming over.”

  “Really?” Brodie said, jerking back her head. “And how did you explain that to Kate? I mean, I would think she’d be a little curious as to why her best friend volunteered to play your nursemaid.”

  “I didn’t have to explain it,” Devon said. “Kate knows.”

  “She knows about you and Gina?” Brodie said, moving closer to the bed.

  “Yeah. I told her today.”

  “And?”

  “And it seems she’s known for a while but wasn’t saying anything,” Devon said, snatching another tissue out of the box. “I guess that’s why she’s a Detective Inspector, and I’m not.”

  “Oh, thank God,” Brodie said, sinking onto the edge of the bed. “I almost fucked up royally a minute ago.”

  “How?”

  “I almost told her the reason I had asked you to go with me this weekend was that you wouldn’t have a problem playing the part of my girlfriend since we're both cut from the same cloth, so to speak.”

  “Oh.”

  Brodie swiveled around. “But I still can’t believe she volunteered to do this. You did tell her the truth, didn’t you? I mean, she knows my family is expecting to meet my new partner—right?”

  “I told her everything, Brodie,” Devon said, pulling the blanket up to her chin. “And you better get going, or you won’t make dinner.”

  ***

  Twenty minutes later, Gina let herself into Devon’s flat. Her first stop was the kitchen to place the takeaway bag on the counter, and her next stop was the bedroom, walking in just as Devon was stripping the duvet off the bed. “So, did it work?”

  Devon looked up and smiled. “Like a charm.”

  “Did you take your allergy meds?”

  “As soon as they left,” Devon said as she loosened the fitted sheet and pulled out a heating pad. “And your idea about using this was priceless. I was so bloody warm. I’m surprised Kate didn’t call a doctor.”

  Gina helped Devon remake the bed and then plopped down on the freshly tucked sheets. “But do you think we went too far? I mean, you told me Brodie hates it when her family tries to play matchmaker, and
here we’re doing the same thing.”

  “All we’re doing is giving them an opportunity to spend some time together. What they make of it is entirely up to them.”

  Devon walked around to where Gina was sitting and gazed into her eyes. “And don’t take this the wrong way,” she said as she lifted off her shirt and tossed it aside. “But do you really want to spend the afternoon talking about Brodie and Kate?”

  Gina adored that Devon rarely wore a bra, and when two rose-tipped breasts came into view, Gina licked her lips. “Who?”

  ***

  “So, where are we going?” Kate said as Brodie turned onto the motorway.

  “My dad lives just outside of Bournemouth, about a two-hour drive give or take.”

  “And your entire family is going to be there?”

  “Actually, I’m not sure who my brothers invited to the party tomorrow, but tonight it’ll be just them and the kids.”

  “Kids?”

  “Yeah. Ethan and his wife have two. Kyle just turned three, and Megan celebrated her eight-month birthday last week. It’s actually one of the reasons I wanted to go home this weekend. Ethan lives an hour outside of London, so the only time I get to see the kids is on weekends, and then it always seems like the family has plans. I haven’t seen her in over a month. She’s probably grown a foot.”

  “I think that’s a wee bit exaggerated,” Kate said with a laugh. “And you like kids?”

  “Well, I don’t like them when they’re crying and throwing tantrums, but for the most part, kids are okay,” Brodie said, glancing in Kate’s direction. “Why? Does that surprise you?”

  “A little,” Kate said, rubbing the back of her neck to calm the hair standing on end. “You just never struck me as the type that wanted to have a baby.”

  “Whoa,” Brodie said, fanning her fingers off the wheel. “I never said I wanted to have a baby. The thought of pushing something that size through my vagina is not on my bucket list, but if ever I do find the right woman, and she wanted to eventually start a family, I wouldn’t have a problem with it.”