Invisible Anna

by Coralie Moss

  Where to begin? Out with the old, she chanted, pulling blankets and sheets off the upper and lower bunks. Now that Gary and Gigi were going to share the other cottage, she could consider what she wanted to do with the place she’d called home for more than twenty years. She ran a hand over the bunkbed’s twin-sized mattresses.

  Lumpy.

  She opened the door to the small closet. Floor-to-ceiling shelves wrapped three sides of the rectangular space, every surface crammed with kids’ toys and teenagers’ sports equipment, craft projects and who knew what else. Nothing fell off the shelves, but the emotional weight of accumulated memories falling against her chest made her stumble. She was beginning to think she needed to armor up emotionally every time she reached for a shelf, opened a drawer, or answered her phone.

  She would order a small dumpster in the morning. And let her grown children know she was doing a massive purge.

  They’d want to know why.

  Which was a question she hadn’t fully answered. Why she was so drawn to sorting the contents of her house and to throwing things out? What, or who, did she imagine she was making room for? Did some part of her want to sell the house, move off the island, leave her friends and her business and every little thing she loved about island life?

  Like the waves that flowed up and down her beach, every hour of every day, curling into the elbows of bays, around the fingers of jetties and over the backs of barnacle-covered rocks, she’d gotten used to the lay of the land.

  And something had come along, something capable of rearranging the landscape, the emotional equivalent of a king tide or storm front. And that something had deep brown eyes and light brown hair and an embrace that made her feel it was safe to explore the body she inhabited at this stage of her life.

  She emptied her wine glass and forgot where she left it. Her mind wandered through page after page of scrapbooked memories while she uncovered mattresses stained from grape juice spills, bloody noses, and kids falling asleep in wet bathing suits.

  Anna closed the closet door, left the mattresses bare, and backed out of the room. Coffee and a clear head were better choices for strolling down the memory lane peopled by tiny feet.

  The living room, clogged from the prior night’s shelf-emptying frenzy, offered no visual respite. She could only laugh at herself. She chafed to get this project rolling, and it was becoming clear things were going to get messier before the clarity she craved took hold.

  The knock at her door, followed by a man’s voice, swung the idea of clarity off its feet and cackled at the startled response of her pounding heart. She regretted getting out of bed, and she regretted miring herself more deeply in this nebulous self-improvement project.

  “Anna? It’s Liam. May I come in?”

  No. Yes. She stumbled around the stacks of books and sat on the couch, knees drawn up, heels on the edge of the seat cushion.

  “The door’s open,” she yelled.

  Liam entered. Circles under his eyes spoke to a lack of sleep. “Can we talk?”

  “If you refill my wineglass.”

  “Where is it?”

  “Somewhere in there.” The sweep of her arm indicated the oddly shaped piles littering the living room floor. More random piles appeared to have made themselves comfortable on the furniture while she’d created a similar chaos in the other bedroom. This was what it must feel like to be caught in a slow-motion avalanche.

  “I’ll get a fresh one.” Liam shrugged out of his jacket, draped it on an empty hook, and stepped to the kitchen. He opened the cupboard where Anna kept her crystal, took two stems in one hand, and filled each halfway. He stepped over a teetering pile of books, one of the Must-Go piles, handed her a glass, and shuffled two piles into one to make room on the couch. “It’s a little early for spring cleaning.”

  If he was testing her capacity for humor, he wouldn’t get very far. Anna looked at him over the edge of the glass. He wore her favorite flannel shirt, the one she watched him take off more than once. There was no sign of a T-shirt lurking underneath. Her house was cool. His broad, brown nipples would be hard, round points. If she caressed them, he’d moan.

  “I have some frustration to burn off,” she said flatly.

  She worked at keeping her thudding heartbeat from bursting through her ribs. His lanky frame took up more than half the couch. One arm rested along the top edge of the cushions. He took a deliberate sip of wine before setting his glass on the only clear spot on the table.

  Leaning forward, he rested his elbows on his knees, fingers playing with the clasp of his watch. “I’m sorry for pushing you for information you weren’t ready to share and I wasn’t sure I really wanted to hear. I’m not sure why I asked, but I did, and I can’t take it back.”

  “Do you want to ask me again?”

  He searched her eyes, and her face. “No.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I’m sure. You were upfront with me before you went to Mexico. I didn’t need any more details then, and I don’t need any more details now.”

  Anna pressed her lips together. If he kept playing with his watch, she’d have to reach over and smack his hand away. “We’ve never really created a designation for what we were doing. Which doesn’t mean we weren’t having feelings for each other.”

  She swirled the liquid in her glass, sipped again, felt the alcohol relax some of the tension coiled in sections along her spine.

  “Are you having feelings for me?” he asked. “Or were you?”

  “Yes. I was. And I am.” She paused with the confession and unwrapped her legs. She’d had enough wine. “Can I get you some water?”

  “No. Thank you.” His gaze followed her to the kitchen and back.

  Anna pressed the side of the cool glass to her cheek.

  “Everything feels up in the air tonight. As you can see.” She indicated the emptied bookshelves and the cluttered floor. “I’m rooted here, and you’re rooted in New York, and no matter what, you’ll always be Daniel’s nephew.”

  Liam switched his attention to the loosened seam along the top of the cushion underneath his arm. “I may be his nephew, but we’ve been more like peers since I was in my twenties.”

  She moved the piles off the crowded end of the couch and sat, facing him. She slid one foot to touch his knee and wiggled her toes under the warmth of his leg. His hand circled her ankle, his thumb at the bone before he could stop the automatic gesture, one they’d lapsed into with ease before the disastrous weekend in New York.

  “I know the whole house looks like explosives went off, but my bed is clear. Could we talk there? I’m tired, and I don’t know how much longer I can keep my eyes open.” She stroked the underside of his thigh with her toes. “Or if you’d rather go home, we can talk tomorrow.”

  He looked from her foot to her face. “I’d prefer to stay here with you.”

  Anna took first turn in the bathroom and left toothpaste on the side of the sink for Liam to swish through his mouth. He was beside the bed, stepping out of his pants, when she walked into her room. Their bodies brushed when they switched places.

  She changed into clean underwear and a T-shirt, and curled into a ball on one side of the mattress. She had no intention of avoiding his touch. She wanted to give him room and an invitation to spoon into her. Relaxed from the wine, she was drawn thin from two days of cross-country flights and the ups and downs of traversing overlapping emotional landscape, hers and Liam’s and Daniel’s.

  There was an ease to being with Liam. The same sense of ease never evolved when she was with Daniel, in college or in Mexico. Yes, she’d spent far more time in the younger man’s company over the past two months, but even at the resort, where most people would have been at their most relaxed and pampered best, she felt the presence of Daniel Strauss’s measuring stick.

  Liam eased onto the bed and reached across her to pull the chain on the little lamp. Tucking his knees behind hers, he stroked her hair away from the side of her face and off her ear. Anna s
tayed silent, enjoying the feel of the mattress accommodating his shifting body.

  “Ready to talk?” he asked.

  “Ready to sleep.”

  Chapter Twenty

  Their bodies were spooned together when Anna first woke up, except now it was her chest keeping Liam’s backside warm. She nuzzled her nose between his shoulder blades, inhaling the scent of his T-shirt and the man underneath. He squeezed the hand of the arm she’d draped over his torso. His breathing went back to being slow and deep within thirty seconds.

  Anna wasn’t going to sleep anymore, and she wasn’t ready to get out of bed. Liam smelled too good, the bed was warm, and the tension she’d carried over the weekend was gone. Their conversation could wait.

  His body felt stronger, more solid, than it had the first time they sat together at the workshop in early October. The tan he brought with him had faded, and his hair, though longer now, had lost some of its honey-colored highlights. She watched the spot where the side of his neck pulsed to the beat of his heart.

  He made it clear, from their start, that he liked her curves. She had enough to share, but she didn’t want to become trapped in a cycle of needing his approval—or desire—to feel good about herself. When they first met, she didn’t feel bad about herself, she just didn’t feel much at all. In hindsight, she recognized she’d been on autopilot, and she would still be operating on that mode if Elaine hadn’t seen how badly she needed rewiring.

  Liam stretched his legs between the sheets. Her sleepy companion released her hand and reached behind him to cup her butt and bring her closer.

  “G’morning. How’s the room service in this place?” Rubbing his hand over her skin and panties, he made no move to turn over or otherwise disturb the warmth they’d captured underneath the blankets.

  “Lousy. I think the staff oversleeps.”

  He released her butt and rolled to face her, speaking into the top of her head as he slid one thigh between hers, nudging her legs apart. His morning erection made its presence known in a relaxed and undemanding way. “I wonder if it would help if one of us slept with the cook. Or whoever’s in charge of coffee-making.”

  Anna nestled into Liam’s thigh, the heat of his muscles and the coarse texture of his hair waking the sensitive skin of her inner legs. He seemed to enjoy the touch as well, if the throbbing of his cock was any indication.

  “I really want to kiss you, but for the sake of our friendship I’m going to brush my teeth first.” His eyes stayed closed while his fingers traced her vertebrae in lazy figure eights.

  “You’re brave to leave the bed, but if you do that, I’ll make coffee.”

  “It might be a while before I’m ready for caffeine. I was planning to come back here and ravish you.”

  “Oh. Then I’ll brush too. First one back in bed gets to choose top or bottom.”

  Liam grabbed her legs with his and wrapped his arms around her torso, pressing her breasts into his chest. “Good luck with that. I don’t let go easily.”

  Anna tickled his sides and slipped off the mattress and into the bathroom, giggling.

  “No fair!”

  “All is fair when kissing’s at stake. Besides, it not about who wins or who loses—”

  “It’s how you play the game. I know. It’s just that I was hoping you had some bondage gear attached to your bed so I could get a head start.”

  Anna washed her hands and stuck her toothbrush in her mouth. She poked her head into the bedroom. “You were looking for what?”

  “Handcuffs, ropes, a piece of silk to cover your eyes—you know, the usual stuff people have in their bedside tables.” A wicked grin settled onto his face. “Let’s see what Anna Granger has…” He reached across the bed, opened a drawer, and peeked in. “Tissues. And reading glasses. Hmm, nothing here I can use.”

  Anna’s eyes widened as he propped himself on one elbow and turned to open the drawer of the other beside table. Foamy bits of toothpaste stuck to the corners of her mouth.

  “Holy…”

  He rifled through the contents, surprise and delight urging his voice into a lower octave. He pulled the travel-sized vibrators and packets of flavored lubricant from the drawer and dumped them between his legs. “Where did these come from? You’ve been holding back on me, Granger.”

  Anna ducked back into the bathroom, her cheeks flaming bright red. “Oh, my God,” she yelled, toothpaste foaming at the corners of her mouth. “I forgot about those! I swear I’ve never used any of them. Not even once.”

  What was that phrase about protesting too much? She rinsed, spat, ran back to the bedroom, and picked up the nub-covered vibrator that had gotten stuck in her hair. “They were a birthday gift from Elaine.”

  “It’s been almost two months since your birthday, and you haven’t given them a test drive?” Apparently, he was in awe of her willpower.

  “Can I blame it on you? Because you appeared a few days after they did, and I think I prefer the real thing.”

  Liam examined each of the sex toys, switching them on and off, playing with the variable speeds. He placed Anna’s nemesis on his first finger and got it going.

  “Would it help to think of this as a Leo-enhancement?” He moved to rest his back against the wall and invited Anna to sit between his thighs, her back to his front.

  “Wait, weren’t you going to brush your teeth?”

  “Don’t touch anything till I get back. I want to watch you try them all.”

  Liam looked to his right when he re-entered the bedroom. Her grandmother’s bureau stood against the wall, an oval mirror attached to the back by an elaborate frame. He dragged the bureau closer to the foot of the bed and looked at her.

  “Can you see yourself?” He stepped to where she was sitting, still in shock, right where he left her propped against the headboard. “Perfect.” He kissed her cheek and pounced, landing on the bed with his knees astride her legs. “I can’t think of anything better to do on a Monday morning than test drive vibrators.”

  “What’s the mirror for?” she asked, swatting at his shin as he nibbled at her neck.

  Anna wanted to hide under her sheets. She tried willing her phone to ring and remembered she had never plugged it into its charger. She tried scooting deeper under the protective covering of her blankets, but Liam’s weight made any movement impossible.

  “So you can watch yourself and so I can watch you watching yourself. Turns me on. I think you’ll like it.”

  She hadn’t seen this playful side of Liam before, the adult version of a kid in a candy store.

  He left on his T-shirt and his briefs, and tucked himself between the headboard and her body, framing her with his legs. Tilting his head to one side, he approved the angle of the mirror. “Perfect. Now, close your eyes and lean into me.”

  Normally, she would be very willing to follow his instructions, but this was pushing her limits. She dressed in front of mirrors. Little ones. Ones that showed her body from the neck up. But she had never looked in a mirror while pleasuring herself or while having sex. Maybe he would let her leave her eyes closed. Maybe she would let him do all the work. She tugged at his T-shirt, pulling it over her head. He laughed and pulled the fabric from her vise-like grip.

  Liam kissed the zone under her ears, along the edge of neck, and down to her shoulder and reminded her to do what they’d been doing since they met. “Breathe.”

  Anna sank her weight into his chest while she stroked his thighs.

  He slipped his hands between his groin and her panties, snaking a couple of fingers around the waistband. “Let’s take these off.”

  She had one fleeting moment to wonder how she’d gone so fast from the previous night’s Am I mad at him? to this morning’s Let’s get naked! She lifted her hips. He peeled her underwear over her ass, held on so she could extricate the first leg, whipped it off her other leg, and tossed it to the floor.

  Underpants. What a poor excuse for protection when a determined lover was in the vicinity. She leaned in
to his chest again, her head resting alongside his jaw, and looked toward the mirror through half-open eyes.

  They took a few breaths together before he ran his hands over her stretchy camisole and cupped her breasts. Her nipples ended up between his thumbs and tips of his forefingers where he rolled, pinched, and pulled until she arched her back. He took her movement as an invitation to bite the side of her neck and squeeze and pinch her nipples more. Gradually, he relaxed his hold on her left breast and brought his hand to cup her sex, sliding his fingers and palm from side to side.

  “You’re rather warm and wet this morning.” He spoke into her skin, releasing his teeth from her neck only to slide them to her shoulder for another bite.

  “I want you to play with me.”

  “What do you think I’m doing?” Running one fingertip around the base of her clitoris, he felt for her arousal.

  “I think you’re spoiling me.”

  “Give me your hand,” he instructed. She obliged, and he topped her index finger with the nub-covered vibrator. “Don’t touch yourself yet. I think it’ll feel better on your skin if we use some lube.”

  The bed dipped when he shifted to the side and reached into the drawer.

  “Strawberry okay?” He tore at the package with his teeth.

  “Yes.”

  “Put some on my fingers.” He handed her the opened packet. The clear, viscous fluid glistened on its way to do Liam’s bidding. “Now watch.”

  Anna lifted her gaze to the mirror. Liam reached between her legs, distributing the lubricant. He spread her trimmed hairs in an upside-down V, exposing the sensitive tissue swelling to meet the sensation of slick, wet, skin-on-skin touch. She looked away to switch her toy on before bringing it cautiously to where Liam’s fingers had her spread and open.

  “Lean into me and do whatever feels good.” His free hand splayed across the front of one hip, holding her to him.

  She closed her eyes at the sound of his voice and gave all her attention to what was happening under her fingertip. Shocks of warmth moved up her belly and along her inner thighs while she zeroed in on refining her self-touch. Liam kept up his slow ministrations.