Stuck in the Cabin (Exiled Dragons Book 8)

by Sarah J. Stone

  “I would hardly say this place is cause for celebration,” he replied dryly, ignoring her suggestion of intimacy.

  “Things will get better, Neil,” she told him, trying to soothe him.

  “You don’t know that. We can’t know that, Stephanie. What if he wins? What if we lose everything and are stuffed in this shitty little apartment forever? It isn’t even big enough to have a separate living room, dining room, and kitchen. They are all just one big room,” he said in a disgusted tone.

  “Neil, it is not the end of the world. So we had to get a smaller place to free up the money we need for the lawyers. We are here together, and we love one another. It will be okay,” she told him.

  “I wish I could be as positive as you are, but I’ve told you before...I don’t know how to be poor. This isn’t me. I feel so out of sorts that I don’t know how to function,” he told her.

  “It’s simple, Neil. You just get out of bed every morning and put one foot in front of the other. Let them take you wherever you need to go each day and then command them to bring you back home. Will your body to move, and your mind will always be where you need it to be. Just don’t ever lose sight of the finish line you’re headed towards,” she told him. She had hoped her little speech would encourage him to rekindle some spark.

  “Goodnight, Stephanie,” he said, not responding otherwise.

  “Goodnight, Neil,” she replied, turning away from him so that he couldn’t hear her as she wept softly into her pillow.

  Unlike Neil, she could deal with a lack of money. It could be stressful at times, but she had grown up in a household where there was never enough money. It was somewhere she had never wanted to be again, and she had worked hard to make sure of it, but sometimes life just handed you challenges and you had to deal with them. This was one of those times.

  Chapter Fifteen

  “Chicken again?” Neil asked as he picked at the chicken and rice casserole on his plate.

  “You were expecting caviar, Neil?” Stephanie asked a bit snidely.

  She was beyond tired of all of his self-pity. He just didn’t seem to shake it, and she was getting to the point where she no longer felt inclined to try to console him. They were supposed to be in this together, but he hardly spoke to her other than when he had to communicate at work or to complain.

  “No, but how much chicken can one person eat?” he asked solemnly.

  “However much he needs to if it is cheap and easy to prepare after having commuted home late in the evenings from work,” she responded.

  “I’m not hungry,” he told her, putting down his fork and leaving the table.

  “Fine. I’ll put it in the fridge, and we’ll have it tomorrow night as leftovers,” she responded spitefully.

  Did he not think she’d like to have something besides chicken, fish, and hamburger constantly? Instead of giving her credit for managing to stretch their food budget as far as possible, all he did was bitch about the quality of his meals. There was a part of her that wanted to run away from all of this, leaving him and his moodiness far behind. She wanted to go home to her family until she could get on her feet, leaving all of this in her past, but she couldn’t. Both she and Neil were being sued and they had to stick together, but she wasn’t so sure anymore that they belonged together outside of their work.

  Stephanie cleared away the dishes, washing them by hand because they didn’t have a dishwasher. She found that it was somehow soothing to stand with her hands in the warm, sudsy water and then rinse them in the opposite side of the sink, placing them in the dish drainer for drying once she was done. It was a chore she had shared with her mother growing up, and she had fond memories of the chats they often had while passing dishes between them.

  Neil had disappeared, taking to the only room in the apartment where he could be alone: the bathroom. It was evident that his time there was just a way of escaping her when he spent thirty minutes behind the old oak door, and she could hear him clicking keys on his phone to read news or play games. Where was her sanctuary?

  This wasn’t the life she had chosen for herself, and she was no happier about it than he was, but she wouldn’t let it define her like he was doing to himself. It permeated every fiber of his being, changing him from the carefree, charming man she had fallen in love with into this sulking, distant shadow of a person who inhabited their home and office. They didn’t speak; they didn’t make love; all they did was argue and take potshots at one another over even the most minor differences. Worst of all, the darkness that was overtaking him seemed to have rubbed off on her. She felt as if a black cloud loomed above her head everywhere she went.

  It was getting cold outside again. Winter was upon them, and the old radiators in the house didn’t do much to ward off the cold. It reminded her of their time stuck in Johnston’s cabin, except this time, there was no fireplace to keep them warm and Neil no longer curled against her at night to combine their body heat.

  It was one such Wednesday when she awoke, shivering in the cool, early morning air. Looking over at Neil, a melancholy came over her that only added to the chill she already felt. She made a decision as she out of bed to shower and get dressed. When Neil awoke, he found her putting things in a suitcase, tears falling down her face.

  “What are you doing, Stephanie?” he asked.

  “I’m leaving you, Neil. I can’t spend another moment in this apartment alone,” she told him.

  “What are you talking about? You aren’t alone. I’m always here,” he told her.

  “No, your body is here. Your mind is elsewhere. It is as if you are the only one who lost anything in this nightmare of a situation. You can’t stop feeling sorry for yourself long enough to realize that I lost my sense of security, too, and part of that safe haven was you. I’ve never felt so miserable in all my life,” she told him.

  “Please, Stephanie. Don’t go. Let’s talk about this,” he told her.

  “It’s too late, Neil. I’ve tried to talk to you until I’m blue in the face, and you just turn away from me. I’m going to my mother’s house for a while. We’ll continue to put up a united front for the purposes of court and work, but I can’t live here in this tiny apartment with a stranger who hasn’t shown any emotion toward me for months. I can’t even remember the last time we made love, and it hurts that you don’t want me,” she said.

  “Who said I don’t want you? I love you, Stephanie. I’m just so preoccupied and stressed,” he said.

  “Do you not realize that I am, too? Can you not see past your own needs? We were supposed to be in this together. The business, the lawsuit, whatever came our way – it was all part of having a life together. The moment things weren’t so good anymore, you shut me out, and there is nothing I’ve been able to do to get back in,” she shouted at him, already near tears though she continued to recite an internal mantra: don’t cry. Don’t cry. You’re strong. Don’t let him see you cry.

  “Please, Stephanie. I’m begging you not to leave me here alone. I will try to handle all of this better,” he pleaded with her.

  The anguish in his voice was heartbreaking, and she wanted to run over to him, to hold him and tell him it would all be okay. She wanted to kiss him and strip him naked, kissing every inch of his beautiful skin, but something inside held her back. He would not change. This is who he was, and it was better that she learned it now rather than after having made a formal commitment to him.

  “No, Neil. I think some time apart will do us good. We can both clear our heads. I will work remotely from the office and come in when I need to for clients. Other than that, we need to keep our distance from one another. Once all this is over, I will give you time to get back on your feet from the lawsuit and then you can buy me out. I won’t fight you for half,” she said resolutely.

  Neil seemed stunned that she wasn’t bluffing and that she was really going to leave him. He looked like a wounded child, and she had to continue talking herself out of staying. She turned to finish putting some things
in her bag and heard the bathroom door close behind her. There. He was in his safe room now. He would be fine. She crept out of the apartment before he resurfaced from his retreat, pulling her suitcase behind her as she headed for the subway station that would take her to Queens. On the way, she called her mother to tell her she was coming and to clear a bed.

  Stephanie had thought she would feel calmer away from him, but it wasn’t the case. It was like there was a piece of her missing that she couldn’t get back. The bed felt empty at night and she found herself having to drink Nyquil to fall asleep. In the waking hours, there was a longing that consumed her. She wanted him and had dreams about better times when they would laugh together and make love for hours.

  “Stephanie, you have to do something about this,” her mother told her over breakfast. “You look like hell. It is obvious that you aren’t sleeping, and I can hear you crying in there late at night.”

  “There is nothing I can do, Mom. He wouldn’t talk to me. It was if the only one affected by all of this was him. How can I be with a man who can’t see past his own feelings?” she asked.

  “Perhaps he did see past his feelings, but just felt too helpless to do anything about it. Men are hopelessly prideful when it comes to being the provider. Even someone who you think is an equal partner and treats you like one has a tendency to feel like they are still the one responsible for your well-being. It is hard for them to feel that they have failed you and still be able to function with you as if nothing is wrong,” her mother said.

  “I don’t know. I just know that I felt like pulling my hair out when I was there with him and he was so distant,” she said.

  “All I am saying is that men handle things differently than women. They tend to internalize to try to protect us from the impending doom they feel. When we were younger, your father lost his job and was unemployed for several months. He was so cold that I thought about leaving him,” her mother continued.

  “Why did you stay?” Stephanie asked.

  “I stayed because I remembered that somewhere within that angry, grumpy man that kept barking at me for little things, like the fact that I forgot to buy creamer for his coffee when he knew I intentionally didn’t buy it because I was trying to save money was someone that I once loved. I realized that my love for him had not gone away. I might want to strangle him on an hourly basis, but at the end of the day, I couldn’t imagine my life without him,” she said.

  “So, how did you get through it then?” Stephanie asked.

  “I coped the best I could. I didn’t let him run over me just because he felt bad inside. We argued a lot about stupid things, like how he would have done better at his last interview if I knew how to properly iron a shirt or who used the last of the toilet paper and didn’t replace the roll. I called him out on his bullshit, and he let me know when he didn’t appreciate passive-aggressive behavior like the giant iron mark on the back of his favorite shirt,” she said with a little hint of a smile. “I loved him, no matter what.”

  “And it got better? You and Dad always seemed so close,” Stephanie said thoughtfully.

  “Of course, it got better. We dangled our frustrations out in the open air and swatted at them like a couple of housecats with a toy on a string. It kept us sane. When he finally found another job, things went back to normal, and all the little hurts of our petty arguing fell by the wayside. You have to make a choice, Stephanie. Is he worth fighting for, or are you not invested in him enough to stay?” her mother said.

  “I can’t answer that right now,” Stephanie said quietly.

  “Oh, I think you can, honey. I think you can. If you didn’t love him, this wouldn’t be so hard for you,” her mother told her, reaching across the table to pat her hand gently with her own.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Neil was surprised to come home to a clean apartment. Since Stephanie had left, he had let it go. His life was even more miserable than it was before, working all day just to pay lawyers, then coming home to an empty apartment to eat cereal for dinner and go to bed so early that the sun had barely even set by the time his head hit the pillow. At least he wasn’t having trouble sleeping now. Instead, he slept all the time. He knew it was depression, but he lacked the motivation to do anything about it. It was the ultimate catch-22.

  It looked like Stephanie had come by and cleaned the place, but he wasn’t sure why. As he sat down his leather messenger bag – one of the few nice things he still owned – he heard a noise come from the bedroom. He didn’t see any signs of her still here and wondered if someone had perhaps come in after she had left as he cautiously made his way down the hall with a butcher knife from the nearby kitchen counter in one hand. The bathroom door was ajar, and he could see her wiping down the mirror over the sink.

  Dropping the knife down by his side, he stepped into the bathroom door and looked at her as she examined her reflection for streaks or spots on the glass. She turned and met his gaze before her line of sight drifted down to the knife in his hand.

  “REDRUM,” she said with a slow smile.

  Neil dropped the knife onto the floor and covered the two steps between them quickly, pulling her close to him.

  “Stephanie, I’ve missed you so much,” he breathed into her hair, holding her so tight that it was almost painful.

  “I’ve missed you, too, Neil,” she replied, though she was pulling away from him. “We need to talk.”

  “Later. I don’t want to talk right now. What I want right now is you. I need you, Stephanie,” he said in an urgent tone, pulling at her clothes.

  “Neil, I’ve been cleaning. I smell like glass cleaner and lemon polish,” she protested, though she quickly lost all desire to talk, too.

  “I don’t care if you smell like cabbage,” he moaned against her neck, where his hot kisses fell down like rain. He was undressing her on the spot in their tiny little bathroom as they bumped into the sink and toilet while struggling to get naked as quickly as possible.

  “I think you would care if I smelled like cabbage,” Stephanie offered as he began kissing her naked shoulders and worked his way down toward the gentle slope of her ample breasts.

  “I think you are...okay, yeah, but you don’t,” he said, moving back upward to her lips and drawing her into a kiss that sent that old familiar tingle down her legs to try to pound its way out through her toes.

  They stood in the cramped bathroom making out with one another like a couple of school kids behind the bleachers at a basketball game. Stephanie quickly forgot her reservations about being with Neil and how he had been acting lately. She remembered what her mother told her as she left about just taking things as they came. This was the first time she’d felt a connection to him for months, and she wasn’t about to pass up the opportunity to touch him in all the ways she’d wanted to by insisting on talking about it beforehand.

  She was caught off guard as he suddenly scooped her up and tossed her over his shoulder like she was some sort of ragdoll. At five-two, her tiny frame was miniscule compared to Neil’s buff six-three frame, and he quite easily hefted her up and carried her toward the bed, playfully slapping her exposed behind with his other hand as he half lay, half dropped her on the bed and then pounced on her like a big cat.

  There was nothing sweet and thoughtful about their lovemaking. It was filled with an intense lust that resulted in a rough passion that was new to both of them. Holding her hands down onto the bed on either side of her, Neil sucked and nibbled at her hard, pink nipples, erect against the cool temperature in the apartment. She moaned loudly as his hand drifted between her legs and his knees pushed her legs apart, gaining him entrance to her hidden, pink folds. He deftly massaged her clit as she squirmed beneath him, enjoying being manhandled a little more than she could have ever imagined.

  Creating the most incredible friction against her throbbing nub with his thumb, he slipped two fingers inside of her already soaked center, curving them slightly to hit the sweet spot he knew oh so well as he stroked in and
out. She cooed breathlessly beneath him as he got her off not once, but several times in increasingly intense, rapid succession, causing her to buck against him as she was consumed with her own release, but he didn’t stop there.

  Neil continued to bring her to orgasm after orgasm until she was spent and had nothing left to give to him. She could feel the soreness already creeping into her swollen center and knew it would only intensify what was to come. An involuntarily groan escaped her as he shoved forward inside of her, filling her with what she had longed for during the lonely months that would hopefully be behind them from now on. His movements were forceful as he plunged deep inside her and ground his hips into hers, penetrating her to the core.

  Still standing by the bed, he pulled her hips closer to the edge and moved her feet upward to rest against his chest and shoulders, pulling her slightly upward at an angle as he continued his beautiful strokes inside of her. She knew the aggression was his way of releasing his pent-up frustrations, and she couldn’t say that she minded. If this was how he chose to get it out of his system, she considered that she might want him to be stressed out more often.

  “Yes, Neil, that feels so incredible,” she panted as his hips pressed into hers again and again, slowly and deliberately.

  “I’ve missed you, Stephanie,” he said, his voice almost a whisper.

  It was raspy and sounded as if he might break into tears. He closed his eyes as he slipped deep inside of her, rocking back and forth into her as they both enjoyed the way her tight inner sanctum enveloped his aching manhood. Then, he couldn’t hold back any longer, speeding his strokes until he was slamming into her hard and fast, enjoying the way she moaned and squealed beneath him.

  “Yes, yes, yes,” she cried out as he pounded into her like a wild animal, finally sinking deep inside of her one last time and filling her with what must have been all of the pent-up emotions he had been keeping from her through all of this. Completely spent, he pulled free of her and collapsed on the bed next to her, tears falling down his face. They lay staring at the ceiling for a bit before either spoke. After what seemed like an eternity, he finally broke the silence.