The Lottery
Page 18
“Such a waste.”
Karlyn turned towards Evangeline. “What is a waste? The time all these news people have put into covering this story?”
“Well, that too. But, I was talking about my granddaughter. She was smart, beautiful, and had a promising future. What she had ever done to deserve this kind of end I will never know.” Evangeline’s eyes misted over, the first true sign Karlyn had ever seen that the woman felt true emotion. “The funeral is this afternoon. You are planning on attending?”
“I doubt Ethan will want me there. I don’t want to cause more trouble for him.”
“Ethan doesn’t know what he wants right now. Are you going to let him treat you like that and get away with it? If so, I will seriously have to reconsider my opinion of you.”
“You saw how he responded to me. I don’t want to make Bailey’s funeral into a mockery. In time, he will see that I did not try to hurt him intentionally. But on the other hand, there is the media…I thought I was supposed to be in hiding?”
“Bailey enjoyed the time you spent with her. I could see it in her eyes when she mentioned you and her brother together. And you should be there, as she was your friend too. Don’t let that man chase you off. You will regret not paying your respects later. And let me worry about the media. They will be kept at bay. I can promise you that.”
Karlyn looked over the screens again, at all the conspiracy theories broadcast on most of the pages. Her heart sank, wishing in a way she had never won, but knowing that her life would be nothing without having known Ethan.
A slamming door roused Karlyn from her thoughts and she watched Ethan stalk into the breakfast room. He grasped a plate, threw some food from the sideboard on it with vigor. Slamming the plate on the table, he scattered the vid screens, anger etched into every line of his face. He looked up at each woman, his expression harsh and unforgiving.
Karlyn’s heart stopped.
“Good morning, ladies. A fine day for a funeral, if I don’t say so myself.”
Karlyn gasped, her eyes rounding, as she turned to see Evangeline’s response. Cool as a cucumber, as always, the elder woman looked like nothing could pierce her armor.
“Ethan, you don’t wear anger very well. Your sister would not want you to make light of this day. Respect her a little more than that.”
“Respect her? That’s a lot coming from you, Grandmother.”
“Grandson, you think you know everything; that I am the evil queen. But just so you know, I loved Bailey, even though you think the exact opposite and I will not allow you to treat her memorial as such. Go spread your venom elsewhere if you cannot contain yourself to act like a man.”
Ethan furiously stared at her for a moment, before turning to Karlyn. “I thought you may be interested to know that I met with the lottery committee yesterday afternoon. It seems I will be auctioned off again, and start off another whole year of slavery thanks to you.”
“Ethan, I never meant for any of this to happen. I just accepted a gift I never expected to win, one I was honest about with you weeks ago. How was I to know it would go so very, very wrong?”
Anger filled his eyes with a strange light. “I will let you two friends continue your breakfast. I’ve suddenly lost my appetite.”
Karlyn watched him go, wondering if he would ever let go of his anger towards her.
****
The casket slowly lowered into the Earth as the pastor murmured a few more words of sympathy to the family. Fresh smells of dirt and grass assailed Karlyn’s lungs as she stood squarely beside Evangeline.
For whatever reason, she had leaned on the woman, absorbing some of her strength. Looking over at her, Karlyn realized she had no right to lean on her now. Evangeline had opened herself up in the ride to her estate two days before, and had shown she did have a heart, and that she had cared, in her own odd way, for her grandchildren.
Looking across the freshly cut grave, she watched Ethan, who’s dark sunglasses masked his eyes. His features were hard, as if he were cut from stone. She knew he was the exact opposite inside, and craved to comfort him, to hold him, to be there to love him. If he’d only let me.
As the casket dropped the final inches, Ethan walked up, grasping a handful of dirt. He kneeled as he sprinkled the earth on top of the beautiful lilies adorning the casket. Ethan then stood, seeming to glance in her direction but with the sunglasses, she could not be sure, and he then turned to leave.
Propelled by some inner force, she followed him. Her heels caught in the soft grass, and he pulled further ahead. She called to him, pleading with him to stop and talk to her.
Turning to face her, he halted. The sunglasses still hid his emotions from her, and she carefully made her way closer.
“I know you don’t believe me, but your sister was special to me. As are you. I want to be there for you, if you would only let me.”
Stone silent, he just looked in her direction for several moments. “My sister and I had a conversation just after you won me. During that conversation, I said that money couldn’t buy intimacy, but Bailey protested, saying I needed to open up to you. You may not have officially been the one to buy me, but ultimately you are the one who profited from the deal. You almost had me, you were so close, but I was right, you can’t buy intimacy. You might have had my body but you didn’t have my soul. I owe you nothing, so please, do yourself a favor and stop embarrassing yourself.”
“Ethan…”
“There was nothing between us. Let it go. I am moving on to the next cash cow, so I can repay my debt to the lottery. Maybe after that, I will do the lottery again, or find a rich old whore with one foot in the grave who might leave me trillions in her will. And none of you will get inside my head ever again.”
“Ethan. I love you. I am in love with you.”
Pausing for a moment, he turned from her. Watching his shoulders sag, she wondered if her words impacted him in some small way. She would repeat them over and over again as many times as he needed to hear them.
“Your loss.” With that he walked away from her.
****
Karlyn looked into the black vid screen, almost hoping Sam wouldn’t answer. She wasn’t up to Sam’s special brand of sarcasm.
“Where the hell have you been? I have been searching for you, even went to Lydia’s house looking for you, which was a joke and a half, considering I got to see firsthand how horrible your mother is.”
“Like you didn’t already know that?”
“Yeah, yeah. But where are you? Do you have any idea how much I have been worrying? Not cool, Bowman, not cool at all.”
“I’m sorry, Sam. I’ve sort of had my hands full.”
“Yeah, once you start riding the baloney pony, you forgot all about Sam. I have barely seen you in a couple of months.”
“It wasn’t all Ethan. There were the commissions and his sister.” Tears came to her eyes. “Oh, Sam, everything is just a complete mess. I’ve really screwed this one up.”
Complete silence filled the screen. Karlyn turned, not used to a lack of communication from her best friend.
“Sam?”
“Karlyn, I don’t know what to say. This is my fault and I never imagined all of this happening when I bought that ticket. I just hated seeing you so lonely, and I wanted to give you a little happiness.”
“There was no way you could have known this would happen.”
Sam shrugged, and Karlyn noted a slight sheen of dampness come to her eyes. Never once had she seen Sam cry in all the time she had known her. “Sam, you’re not…?”
Wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, she shrugged again. “Well, what was I supposed to think? You disappear without a word because you are in trouble that I caused. I thought you weren’t speaking to me.”
“Sam.”
“Yeah, leave me alone. You are my best friend and the thought of you not being in my life freaked me out a little.”
“You bought that ticket out of love, and we both know it. Yes, i
t was a misguided attempt, but ultimately I’d do it all over again.”
“What? So, the sex was that good?”
A blush warmed Karlyn’s cheeks as she looked away briefly.
“Ahh…so you did finally ride the pony.”
“Yes, I did. But Sam, it was more to it than that. I fell for him. Hard. And now he won’t speak to me.”
“First point – why the hell did you fall for him? Second point – does he see this as your fault? I’ll straighten him out and let him know I bought the ticket. He needs to be mad at me.”
“It’s a long story, but ultimately, he thinks the ticket business was a set-up, and it was some grand scheme by his grandmother to ruin his life.”
“Well, kiddo, I hate to tell you this, but he was only going to be with you a short time. Ultimately he would have walked away.”
“I know. But there was this little part of me that sensed that he might stay. We became good friends and even better lovers, and there were moments where it felt so real. I can’t imagine a future without him.”
“You need to. Use this, and work through it, like you have time and time before with the emotions you have dealt with over your mother and father. Do what you do best.”
****
Traveling back to the estate with Evangeline, she broached the subject of going back to her studio.
“I don’t think it is a good idea. The media is still circling this story.”
“I need to get back to my life, my painting. See if there is something I can salvage from this fiasco. And what better thing to do with the pain of this whole tragedy, but to throw myself into my work? I need to be creative, and release this and move on. I can’t do that here.”
“What about me?”
Karlyn looked at the old woman. Stunned into really looking at her for the first time, seeing the weathered lines around her brow and eyes, seeing the pain she wore that somehow had been overlooked when looking at the woman before. For the first time, she saw weakness in Evangeline. And it was one of the most beautiful and scary things she had ever seen.
“What are you asking?”
“I just lost my granddaughter. My grandson, who had already cast me out of his life, has pushed me even further. He packed his bags before the funeral, and will be gone to whatever harlot wins him. You gave me a little hope I could find some opening with him, and now you want to leave.”
Stunned into silence, she looked out the window. “You are welcome to my studio whenever you want. I am sorry for calling you a heartless bitch. I see now that you care for them in your own way. But I am sorry I will not be able to help you with Ethan. He made it absolutely clear he was walking away from me.”
“Have I rubbed off on you? He just walked away, and I haven’t seen a tear yet.”
“Don’t ask me that or you will see one. Later, when I am home, I am sure they will come. For now, I just want to go back home.”
“Once we arrive back to the estate, collect your few items and I will ship you on your way back to the studio. Please allow me to send a couple of my guards, so they can assist you in getting in if there are any obstacles, and make sure the apartment is clear.”
Knowing the older woman needed to help in some small way, she agreed, and hours later she was firmly ensconced into her studio, alone for the first time in days.
And the tears did come.
Chapter Twenty
Two months later, the scandal had passed, for the most part, and Karlyn was able to lead her relatively normal life. She had thrown herself into her work, painting an unprecedented amount of paintings, most of them featuring one particular person somewhere within the scene. She had worked through her love, her pain, her loss, and the entire story was laid bare on those canvases.
She had even included a couple where Bailey was the focus, and gifted one to Evangeline, who had become a regular visitor to the studio. Her own grandmother had been there for her as well, offering her succor that her own mother would never give. During the storm of reporters, her mother had been quoted as saying that her daughter had been a failure up to this point anyway, so more failure would not have been a surprise.
Fortunately for Karlyn, the media had made her famous, or rather infamous, and offers for her work as well as commissioned paintings had exploded. Everyone who was anyone had to have one of her works in their home. She needed the income, as her court case was closely approaching. The connections she had made the night of the gala cared less about the media frenzy, as it only made her value skyrocket. She was booked for months into the future, which all hinged on the court ruling. If she wasn’t incarcerated, she would have one hell of a career.
Once and for all, she could face the world, tell them her story, and hope to put the whole mess behind her. Evangeline had made good on getting her the best attorney, but Karlyn knew that the best came with a price tag.
Over dinner the night before the proceedings, Sam took Karlyn out, in hopes of getting her mind off of the potentially impending doom. Drinks abounded and rich food ingested, hoping they could celebrate the following night as well. Lifting her wine goblet, Sam offered a toast.
“To the most incredible woman I know who will absolutely get off on these ridiculous charges tomorrow.”
“Here, here!” Pressing her glass to Sam’s, Karlyn hoped to Sam’s toast would prove accurate. “Tomorrow, I will be able to put this bullshit in the past and move on.”
Before she knew it, tears sprung from her eyes and she sobbed, not caring who was watching. Sam jumped up from her seat in the cushioned booth across from her and sat beside her, consoling her.
“I love him, Sam, and it is all your damned fault.”
“Yeah, I know, baby. My damned fault. I should never have bought that stupid ticket, and I wouldn’t have, if I had known this is where this whole mess would lead.”
Putting her head on Sam’s shoulder, she continued to weep. “He hates me, Sam. I didn’t mean to hurt him, I never expected all this. But he hates me, and I love him, and my heart hurts. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep. I haven’t even washed my pillow cases, just so I can smell him when I do try to sleep.”
Sam cradled Karlyn’s head, trying to quiet her, as many were looking and listening.
Sam stiffened beside her. “Don’t look now, but your boy toy is here.”
Karlyn looked up as Ethan rose from the seat he had at a table a few feet away from them. As he walked towards the pair, there was a softness to his face, unlike the last time she had spoken to him. So unlike the last paintings Karlyn had painted with him as the subject.
Pressing Karlyn’s face up by the chin, Sam looked at her squarely. “Buck up, baby. You are about to have a visitor and you need to look less weepy.” Sam brushed her hair back, and dabbed at her tears with one of the soft linen napkins on the table. Karlyn looked up; facing Ethan, she sat up straighter and attempted to look less than the mess she felt inside.
“Sam. Karlyn.” He nodded at each, never taking his eyes off of Karlyn.
Karlyn looked up to him, holding on to the table like her life depended on it, and she looked down at the white knuckled grip she had on the edge. “Good evening Ethan. So very nice to see you.” Tears glittered, but she held them in check and prevented them from falling.
Pure longing seeped from her pores and almost drowned her. The two had been apart for far too long, and it was clear she was still madly, deeply in love him. The tension built, as neither spoke, but he just stared into her eyes.
A sudden sigh escaped Ethan’s lips, and he softened further. He was on the brink of saying something, Karlyn knew, and awaited his next words with baited breath.
“I…” He stopped, apparently choosing his next words carefully, and then giving his head a gentle shake. “It was nice to see you, Karlyn. Good luck tomorrow in court.” With that, he turned to leave, and she silently watched him retreat.
Shocked silence drifted over her, as Sam paid the check and they left the restaurant. Sam pushed her friend i
nto a waiting aerocab, and gave the driver directions to the studio. Midway there a quiet sob was released, and Karlyn rested her head on her friend’s shoulder.
“You do know he has been put back out into the lottery? I just saw the press release this morning.”
Karlyn looked up, surprise filling her face. “So soon?”
“It has been two months since the whole fiasco erupted. They need to recoup the losses they faced when women demanded their money back from the last lottery.”
“I suppose so.” Unadulterated sadness covered Karlyn’s face. “I guess I just hoped I would have a chance…I don’t know. Who the hell am I fooling? Of course he needs to honor his obligations, and we both need to move on.”
“You are both a bunch of fools.”
“What?”
“It is apparent he still has feelings for you. And you have spent the better part of two months moping for the man, a man you love. You both had the opportunity tonight to say it out loud, to come together and love each other, and what did you do? You both blew it.”
“He told me how he felt at the funeral. I let him go. End of story.”
“Bullshit. He is madly in love with you and it was etched all over his face tonight. He was a coward and didn’t say it. The funeral – that was just the pain talking, and you well know it.”
Karlyn looked out the window as the city zoomed by, making her dizzy. A light of hope filled her. The aerocab stopped in front of Karlyn’s stoop and she exited, turning to Sam. “Thank you for tonight. I will see you at the courthouse at nine on the dot.”
****
The following morning, Evangeline picked her up from the same stoop, along with four armed guards. Karlyn was unsure as to why the woman felt such a show of force was needed, but she let it go. Evangeline felt she needed to help for some reason, and Karlyn was in no mood to fight her on it. Once they turned on to the street, working their way to the courthouse, Karlyn wondered if four was enough.