Dark Mind (The Dark Mind Trilogy Book 1)

by Matthew Goldstein

  Against the pounding in his head that refused to diminish, Cole cracked open his eyes. He made out a young nurse’s face peering at him and his mother’s worried face in the background.

  “Would you like a drink of water?” the nurse asked.

  Cole moved his head up and down a fraction of an inch, afraid to aggravate the pounding within.

  “Open your mouth.”

  Cole obliged, parting his lips just enough for water to be poured through the slit. The first swallow brought a horrific burning sensation but with each successive swallow he could feel the wonderful life energy flowing back into him. A few seconds after the drink, he was able to open his eyes completely.

  “Can you speak?” the nurse said.

  “I-” Cole cleared his throat and tried again. “I think so.” His voice was hoarse but it was no longer painful. “Am I okay?”

  “Yes, you’ll be fine. Don’t you worry yourself for one second.”

  Cole licked his lips. “I feel like there’s something you’re not telling me. Why does my arm hurt so much? Tell me the truth.”

  “Tell him everything,” Meredith said. “He’s not an ordinary kid. You can be straightforward with him.”

  “All right,” the nurse said, hesitating. “Your arm was pretty badly burned. There’s a good chance that when the bandage is removed you will have a scar.”

  Cole leaned his head back and looked at the ceiling, trying to absorb this information. There's no cheating those damn games. “Will it at least look badass?”

  The nurse smiled. “Very. You will be the envy of everyone at school.”

  “Cool. How big is it?”

  “It stretches most of the way from your shoulder to your elbow.”

  “Phew. That is big.” Cole lifted his arm to view the length of the bandage, trying to imagine what it must look like underneath. “I must have almost died in there.”

  “You are one lucky boy.” She patted his head and turned to Meredith. “He seems fine. Is it all right if I leave you two alone?”

  Meredith nodded and the nurse left. She then moved a chair next to the bed and took a seat, smiling weakly. “Hey Cole. I’m so glad you’re okay. You’ve given me a lot of scares lately. Almost three heart attacks in the last three days. You gotta go easy on this old woman.”

  “Yeah…sorry ‘bout that. None of them were on purpose. What happened?”

  “You probably know as much as I do. I woke up to see everything engulfed in flames. I went up to your room to get you but you were already gone. That was really sweet of you to come to my room but I want you to know that I value your life more than my own.” She squeezed his hand.

  “I couldn’t leave you. Ever. My door was blocked so I went out the window and came back in through the front of the house. Do you know how the fire started?”

  “Not at all. I keep thinking maybe I left the stove on or something but nothing is coming to me.”

  “What about the house?” Cole said, dreading the answer. “Were they able to save it?”

  “It’s probably best not to think about it. If it can be salvaged at all, it’s going to be a long time before it’s livable again.”

  Cole closed his eyes. He was having trouble trying to cope with reality; it was all so surreal. He was thankful for both his and his mother’s safety, but in the blink of an eye, everything they owned was gone. Gone. Utter destruction of everything he loved. The worst part was, he was almost certain he knew what, or rather who, had started the fire. He had been struggling not to think about it but the realization kept forcing its way to the front of his mind, too important to simply ignore. He had waited too long. He should have struck first. Now that the first blow was dealt, he would feel no remorse or trepidation in carrying out a counterattack.

  The war had begun.

  * * *

  Cole excused himself under pretense of exhaustion and closed his eyes. A short while later, sleep did overtake him but he awoke to the sound of soft whispers in the dark room. He kept his eyes closed, straining to make out the words through his drowsiness.

  “I just don’t know what to do. I mean don’t get me wrong, I am grateful that we’re both alive and okay, but after these medical bills…I’m going to have to get a third job but I just don’t know how I’ll find the time. I knew I should’ve gotten better insurance. I’ll never sleep, never see Cole… and everything we ever owned. It’s all gone. I just don’t know.” This was followed by muted sobbing.

  “Shh, shh. It’s okay. Don’t worry about a thing. We’ll figure it out. There are worse evils than debt. And you can stay with me as long as you want.”

  There was sniffling. “I… appreciate that so much. I really do. I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you.”

  “You don’t have to. I’m just happy you’re both okay.”

  “Thank you. Thank you.”

  Cole continued to feign sleep but deep inside a fierce anger was growing. It was all he could do not to flinch under this tumult of emotion roaring within him. Someone was going to pay for what he did and Cole knew who it would be. He would pay dearly.

  Cole was released from the hospital the next day. Though it should have been the last thing on his mind, he could not help but feel lucky that he didn’t have to worry about the homework he had never finished. He went home with his mom and Beth in a disturbingly quiet car ride. Cole had never seen his mom look so pale and fragile, even when she had been in the hospital. They set up Beth's house for an extended stay in silence, no one making eye contact, everyone pretending this wasn’t happening.

  Finally over dinner, Beth was the one to break the silence. “If you’re going to be staying here, I can’t have you moping around, not saying anything. You need to snap out of it. Your mood is a direct consequence of your attitude.”

  “Sorry, you’re right,” Meredith said. “We need to work through this. It could always be worse. So, how have you been? Have you started preparing for Thanksgiving yet?”

  “I was just starting,” Beth said. “And I’m thrilled you’re here because now you can help me.” She smiled, a rare sight.

  This drew a smile from Meredith and for the rest of the night they engaged in friendly conversation. Cole, however, did not join in. Their levity was lost on him; there was only one way to make him feel better and it killed him every second knowing there was nothing he could do about it. He wished he was independent that he could leave the house without any questions, but even so, since he would have to walk, the distance between him and his enemy was too great. He would have no idea how to find his way there from this new location.

  He was aware, though, that Travis knew exactly where Beth lived and if he found out that his attack had failed, he might strike again. It would be most likely soon too since Travis, rightfully so, would fear retaliation. Cole remained diligently by the window most of the night, watching for any suspicious movements, dismissing any attempts by his mother to engage him in conversation. However, his stay in the hospital had drained him and, despite his best efforts, in the wee hours of the morning, he could no longer raise his heavy eyelids and he drifted off to sleep.

  His dreams were filled with swirling flames and screams. He was running through a burning building, searching for a way out but there were no doors or windows and around every corner he caught a glimpse of Travis’ smiling face before it disappeared around the next bend. He awoke with a start, covered in sweat, his wide eyes scanning the room for the fire. It took him a few seconds to shake off the confusion and remember where he was. He had just relaxed his muscles and was preparing to go back to sleep when his mother’s head poked inside the doorway.

  “Oh, good, you’re awake. How do you feel? Are you up for going to school?”

  Cole opened his mouth in a wide yawn. “Sure, why not?” As long as I’m not in the house, the house is safe.

  Meredith acted that morning as if nothing was out of the ordinary, which greatly impressed Cole. Not wanting to ruin her act, he did his best to imita
te it. At school, she wished him a good day and told him that if she was busy later, Beth would pick him up.

  A number of students gave him curious looks when he walked into his classroom with a bandage covering his entire upper arm. None approached him to ask him about his injury but he was aware of excited whispers. Nonetheless, he was uncaring about everyone and everything. His life had taken such a turn as to make school and everything about it seem trivial.

  All that day he was given special treatment by his teachers, who showed the greatest sympathy towards him. He was thankful to be allowed to sit in silence in the corner as there was no chance of him paying attention.

  At lunch, he was not surprised to find Amy missing. He sat alone, ignoring the stares and pointing that were more common than usual. He was lost in his own world when a boy in his class approached and stood across from him, arms folded.

  “Hey, uh, is it true? Your house burned down and you almost died?” the boy said.

  Cole noticed several groups of students all watching the conversation with bated breath. He looked the boy square in the face, judging him, unsure what to make of this conversation.

  The boy shifted his weight. “So? Is it?”

  Cole pointed to his arm. “What does it look like? I didn’t get that falling out of a tree.”

  The boy’s eyes lit up and he smiled. “Oh shit, I knew it!” He took a seat across from Cole, leaning forward expectantly. “What happened?”

  “Don’t really wanna talk about it if you don’t mind,” Cole said.

  The boy leaned back. “Man… Come on.”

  Cole responded with a dead stare.

  “All right.” The boy returned to his group of friends.

  Cole finished his lunch in peace but noticed that the conversation within that group never strayed from him. This was the last thing he needed right now. He hated the extra attention, especially at a time when he particularly wanted privacy. He was beginning to wish he had stayed home when lunch thankfully came to an end.

  The rest of the day passed without incident, but when all the students were piling out at the end of the last period, Mrs. Taylor called him to her desk.

  “How are you, Cole? Does your arm hurt? I heard what happened and I am so sorry.”

  Cole nodded. “I’m all right.”

  “I want you to know that if you need anything, anything at all, just ask.”

  “Thanks.”

  “And if you have trouble with anything in class, just let me know. I’ll be your personal tutor.”

  “Thanks.”

  “All right, get going. I don’t want to keep your mom waiting.”

  When he got out of school he was greeted by the unfortunate sight of Beth sitting impatiently in her minivan. He glanced around him in all directions, searching for that familiar car stalking him, certain that he was being watched, but he saw nothing.

  “Come on,” Beth shouted through the open window.

  Cole surveyed the area one more time before making his way to Beth. He must be hiding out of sight now. And for good reason. “Where’s my mom?” he said as climbed into the minivan.

  “She’s out looking for a job,” Beth said, “and I'm stuck taking you to your appointment.”

  “Can't you just not take me?”

  “I wish I could but I promised your mother.”

  Cole couldn't argue. The last thing he wanted was to make his mother's life any more difficult. They pulled up to Dr. Stern's office and Cole grudgingly went inside.

  “Cole!” Dr. Stern said. “Anything new happen to you in the last week?”

  “You have no idea.”

  “Great, let's go have a chat,” she said as she led him to the back room.

  “Oh, good,” he whispered under his breath.

  “Before we get started,” Dr. Stern said, as they took their respective seats, “I feel it necessary to stress how important it is that you be honest with me. I know I've said it before but you never seem to take it seriously.”

  “Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I just didn't think you'd believe me. I mean I did tell you the truth at first.”

  “Fair enough. Let's work together on this. I'll try to be more trusting if you're more honest. Is there anything that happened over the course of last week that you would like to talk about?”

  “Great,” Cole said. “So I guess you didn't hear. I really hate talking about this but I might as well tell you since you'll hear about it from my mom anyway.”

  “Tell me about what? You don't have to be afraid to tell me anything.”

  “I'm not afraid.” He sighed, his gaze fixated on the carpet. “My house burned down.”

  “Oh my! Oh... my... Oh...”

  “We have no idea how it happened but we're living with my Aunt Beth for now. That's why I didn't wanna talk about it. It sucks. Can we talk about something else? Like my real friend?”

  “I know you don't want to talk about it,” Dr. Stern said, “but that may be precisely why you should. You need to work through serious life traumas.”

  “I'm gonna be straight with you. Yeah, it sucks, and yeah, I'm upset about it, but with everything else that's been going on, it's almost overshadowed.”

  “You have my attention.”

  “It's just that now that we lost everything we have to live with my aunt and my mom's broke. And my friend is cool but she's... unhappy at home.”

  “I'm sorry, Cole. That is a lot to handle but we can work through it. Where would you like to begin?”

  “I don't really wanna get into any of it.”

  “Your friend. You said her name was Amy?”

  “Yes.”

  “Tell me more about how you met her.”

  “Dr. Stern...” Cole looked up at her in exasperation and was surprised to see a hint of a smile on her face.

  “I figured about as much. We are going to talk about all this soon but first I'm going to try something new. Mix things up a bit. I want you to lie down and close your eyes.”

  “Dr. Stern, no offense but we've already been through this.”

  “Just do it. Trust me.”

  Cole sighed but obeyed.

  “Good. Now what do you see?”

  “What do you mean what do I see? My eyes are closed.”

  “Exactly what I said. What do you see?”

  What is she getting at? “I don't know. Some black blobs?”

  “Try to distinguish the shapes. What do you think the blobs are?”

  “Seriously?”

  “Cole! Stop fighting me and do as I ask.”

  “All right, all right. Umm... Let's see... Chocolate pudding? A swamp monster? Pools of blood? Some weird faces?” He heard some scribbling sounds as Dr. Stern wrote on her pad. “Can I open my eyes?”

  “No, keep paying attention to the shapes and tell me anything else you see.”

  Cole watched the black shapes drift lazily inside his eyelids. He saw strange patterns come and go but nothing distinguishable. This is stupid. The shapes had started to move faster and he heard a familiar whisper in his head. Not these again. Not now. As it began to grow in intensity, he thought the shapes were beginning to form faces. A sudden shiver ran down his spine and his eyes snapped open. “Can we do something else?” he said, trying to keep the fear out of his voice.

  “What's wrong?”

  “Nothing. Please, let's do something else.”

  Dr. Stern scribbled on her pad. “What are you thinking about right now? Tell me whatever words come to mind first.”

  “I'm thinking that you're being weird today. Um. Table. Couch. Wall. Floor.”

  “Don't just name things in the room. Close your eyes and tell me what you're thinking.”

  “I don't want to.”

  “Why not? Is something bothering you?”

  “No, I... Fine, whatever.” Cole closed his eyes, praying the faces and voices would not return. How did this start happening? What am I supposed to never close my eyes again?

  “Good. Now just st
art spouting random words.”

  The whispers were still present but less noticeable if he did not focus on them. “Bored. Black. Swirly. End. Antelope. Ax. Hypocrisy. Small. Lone. Win. How many words do you want me to say?”

  “That's good. Now, without thinking about it, tell me off the top of your head, what's your greatest fear?”

  “Being alone. No wait. It's... Why did I say that? Why did you make me say that?”

  “It's okay to open up, Cole,” Dr. Stern said, smiling. “You can open your eyes now. Time's up.”

  “Can you tell me what that was all about?” Cole said as he followed her out of the room.

  “Sorry, no. It's part of a new technique I'm trying out. It will take multiple sessions. I look forward to our next visit.”

  “Um, yeah.”

  As soon as Cole left, Dr. Stern picked up the phone and dialed. “Brent? I don't know how you do it.”

  There was a chuckle from the other end of the line. “So I take it went well?”

  “Oh, yes. It was the first time I've gotten him to open up. I feel like I breached the castle wall. I have to ask, how did you know that would help without even knowing the disorder?”

  “Call it intuition. Sometimes with these stubborn children you need to catch them off-guard. Although to be fair, I wasn't certain it would help. I had some other suggestions had that one failed but I guess you got lucky.”

  “So simple, yet so effective. Seems obvious once you think of it. How can I ever thank you?”

  Brent's voice was jovial. “You can stop hating me for one.”

  “Now, Brent, I don't hate you.”

  “Maybe not now but what will happen next time we see each other at a conference? Perhaps we can put our differences aside. For professional reference of course.”

  “I supposed we could. For professional reference. Thank you again.”

  “Uh huh. And if you need any more help, don't hesitate. I like a challenge. Goodbye, Rita.”

  “Goodbye, Brent.” Dr. Stern hung up the phone and shook her head, a smile plastered on her face. “Why is that arrogant bastard always right?”