Alone

by Richard D. Logan PhD

  And she had finally begun to tell her story. She had every reason to be consumed by anger, bitterness, and self-pity. But she wasn’t. She could be excused had she found escape in drugs. But she didn’t. She could have complained about her lousy lot in life. She never did. She had every reason to mistrust people, but she didn’t. In the mid-1980s she would meet her co-author and they would begin talking about finishing the job of telling her amazing story.

  Interview with Tere’s daughter, Blaire, in 1999:

  Question: “What do you think of your mom?”

  Answer: “My Mom? She is my hero.”

  (Blaire became choked up as she gave her answer, gazing lovingly at her mom and displaying a broad smile.)

  AFTERWORD

  by Tere Fassbender

  In 1990, I was working for the Wisconsin Department of Natural Resources, a job I had had since 1986. I was living in De Pere at the time. Our Water Resources staff was having a meeting that was to be moderated by the supervisor from Water Regulation and Zoning.

  He walked into the room, flannel shirt, suspenders, blue jeans, work boots, greasy black hair, a beard, and a mustache long enough to drag in his soup. My first impression: “Who is this greaseball?”

  Time passed and I never saw or thought of him. Then I applied for a job with Water Regulation and Zoning, a position responsible for wetlands and shoreline protection. Who was on the opposite side of the table interviewing me but the “greaseball.” I must have interviewed well because I was given the job. I was a Water Management Specialist, assigned to protect our state’s navigable waterways, working out of the Marinette DNR office. I loved my job and traveled the Northeastern region. This was a great way to get to know the lakes and rivers and, just like when I was a kid, I loved being outdoors on my own, sometimes even in risky conditions in remote areas.

  That is how I came to know my boss, Ronald Fassbender. Many coworkers were fearful of him, as he had a scruffy appearance, a somewhat rough-edged manner, and a gruff raspy voice a little like Kris Kristofferson – one you could cut wood with. He looked and acted like a mountain man. In fact, I learned later that he was a mountain man – a re-enactor, that is. He was one of those guys who liked to camp out in the boonies and wear smelly, wet furs and call it fun. Women were especially cautious of Ron. I don’t know why because I never had that fear, but only came to respect him and learn from him once I started getting to know him. Ron always was concerned for his staff, and they were his priority. He was very good at his job, no matter what his appearance. I learned that Ron was real and so comfortable with himself that he didn’t need to try to impress anybody.

  During this time I was having trouble with my marriage because my third husband had really pulled the wool over my eyes. He was not the kind and charming man I thought he was, but a manipulator who had successfully hidden the fact that he was a pedophile all during our courtship and marriage. Being the trusting person I am, and someone who always likes to think the best of people, I had not wanted to believe what my teenage daughters were telling me – about how he gave them the creeps – and I didn’t want to believe it when he was charged with child molestation for an incident in town. He never molested my own kids, thank God, but they had been complaining more and more about his creepy and inappropriate behavior. In the beginning I was defending him and my children were acting out as a result. I thought it was mostly teenage rebellion, like I had gone through. Looking back, I do not blame them. I should have been more aware, more protective, and more trusting of my own children. Defending my husband and refusing to see what was happening caused my kids severe problems at the time, since they believed I wasn’t being there for them. And I had always been there for my kids. They had been the center of my life ever since I had them. I think, in fact, that having them to take care of kept me doing something meaningful and helped me get through the very hard years after losing my family on the Bluebelle. My kids also helped me hold it together during all of the running I did for so many years. I guess I couldn’t accept that my third choice for a husband hadn’t been a good one, and that my third marriage wasn’t going to work out either. I believed very deeply in marriage and in family, and I needed a partner in life.

  I confided in Ron about the problems I was having, and he was supportive and understanding. He took extra time to meet with me and helped me sort through my job and family situations. He was very good in dealing with people problems.

  I was so thankful for my job. I had moved to Oshkosh as the Water Management Specialist. My job was my haven where I could get away from my marriage problems. I had entered into my third marriage out of one of my strongest – and weakest – inclinations: being very trusting. I buried myself in my work and, for the most part, it kept me sane.

  Ron and I became very good friends. I would tell him my problems and he would tell me his. In 1995, to get away from my now ex-husband, who had just been released from prison for felony child sexual abuse, I decided to leave the DNR and move to Wilmington, North Carolina. My in-laws from my first marriage lived there and said we could stay with them until we knew it was safe for me and my kids to return to Wisconsin.

  Even though my first marriage had failed, too, I always had a wonderful relationship with my first husband’s family, especially his brothers, and they were always there when I needed them. My first husband was not a bad person either; it is just that we were young and not right for each other. But I had been adopted like a daughter and sister by his family. That family, like many other wonderful people over the years, reached out to me. I owe them more than I could ever repay.

  My son, Brian, found a job right away, as did my oldest daughter, Brooke, but my youngest daughter, Blaire, was lonesome for Wisconsin so she flew back to live with Grandpa and Grandma Scheer, the uncle and aunt who had adopted me. I found some work but was not happy, realizing I missed my best friend, Ron, so very much. We wrote letters and spoke on the phone daily. He flew to North Carolina for a brief visit. And, just like that, we realized we were in love.

  Ron returned to Wisconsin, to his job and to a failing marriage. I stayed in Wilmington for another month to think about everything, and then decided I really wanted to be with him. I came back to Wisconsin and got my job back with the DNR. I felt so fortunate to again be doing the work I loved.

  Ron and I have been together since Thanksgiving of 1995. Because I had always wanted to prove once and for all that I had told the truth about the Bluebelle, I agreed in 1999 to have a sodium amytal interview. Proving that I told the truth about what happened was most important to me, but the session also was used to see if we could uncover anything more about what really happened that night on the Bluebelle. I know that the psychiatrist was interested in whether I had repressed anything. I never felt afraid to confront the possibility that there might have been something I didn’t remember because it was too terrible; I knew I had already remembered some pretty terrible things. When the psychiatrist decided that I hadn’t repressed anything, and assured me that I had told the truth, I felt a new level of peace in my life, another step in healing.

  In 2001 Ron and I retired from the DNR and decided we loved Kewaunee, Wisconsin, a small community located on the shores of Lake Michigan. We bought a house and are living the retired life there.

  Of course I love being near the water and take as many walks along the shoreline as I can. It is a wonderful feeling but at times melancholy as I can hear the waves that sometimes remind me of my time on the ocean and of my family from so long ago. I feel closer to them there. While there is a melancholy feeling, it is also soothing; all in all, a sweet sadness. It is a place where my loyal little dog, Angel, and I can just be free and think.

  My family has been very important to me. My children were raised as grandchildren to Dotty and Ralph Scheer, my aunt and uncle. We lost “Unk” in 1997, but he was Grandpa to my kids. A terrible loss to all of us. It was sad that my daughter, Blaire, did not have Grandpa at her wedding in 1999. But we gained a wonderfu
l son-in-law, Jake.

  My son, Brian, and his wife, Robbi, gave us our first grand child. I saw Alison born and I cried. She was such a miracle. Life is a miracle. I guess I have a special appreciation for that. Alison has spent lots of time with us and we are so proud of her.

  Brooke, my oldest daughter, works in the movie industry and recently moved from Austin, Texas, to Chicago. She loves the big city. We see her more often than when she lived in Austin.

  Did I say how proud I am of my great kids?

  In 2005 our first grandson, Wesley, was born. Alison has always loved her brother but they sure can get into scuffles. We have Wesley with us at times, but not as often as “Ali butt.”

  My beloved Aunt Dot, who was there for me always, died in the spring of 2008. She was very ill for six months and just kept getting worse and worse. I was with her as much as possible while she was in the hospital. It hurt to see her in so much pain. We all miss her, my kids especially, since she was always Grandma to them. She loved me and did her very best to protect me after the Bluebelle. Even though she kept me from truly dealing with the tragedy, she always gave me a safe place. Taking me in when she already had three sons was not easy, I am sure. As the years have gone by, I have appreciated what she did more and more.

  Blaire and Jake gave us our second grandson, Arthur, born on September 5, 2009. He is such a happy little guy.

  So you can see, after struggling for so many years, I now am in a very good place in my life. I count my blessings and am grateful for all the love and good health that I share with my family and friends.

  The year of 2009 has been so good as I have reconnected with some very dear old friends.

  My roommate from Ferry Hall, Janis, contacted me in April 2009. She was another steady friend who blessed my life. Her health was not good so I drove to Cicero, Indiana, for a few days to visit her. It was so wonderful to see my old friend. I left feeling so awful for her, but so thankful for my good health. We talked almost daily. On July 4 I received a call from Janis’ husband who told me that she had died. I was in shock, thinking he was joking. I miss Janis but know she is in a better place and no longer suffering. Life is so often a matter of losses balanced by blessings.

  In June, I heard from another old friend: my best friend, Pam, from my school days after the Bluebelle was visiting her sister in Green Bay. Pam has always been there, too, ready to welcome me any time for any reason. I went to visit her; we hadn’t seen each other for years. We had fun reminiscing about the mischief we used to get into. As a bonus I got to see her father, Jack. In the years after the Bluebelle, he and his late wife, Mary Beth, had given me a second home I could always go to – and I was at their house a lot. Seeing Pam and her father was quite an event. I am so happy to have these people who have been a large part of my life back in my life.

  I had lost track of my dear friend, Richard Logan. The last time I saw him he was very ill. Then I could not find him in the phone book and thought, perhaps, he had gone to greener pastures. But it turns out he had moved to Minneapolis with his wife, Carol, to be near their granddaughters and for medical treatment. We got back in touch in September, and I was thrilled to know that Dick was alive and well.

  So we rekindled our friendship and wound up writing this book together.

  I am grateful to Dick, as he has helped me through many rough spots. And now he is helping me to finally get over my tragedy. The elephant I carried for so long on my shoulders suddenly is no longer there.

  My most recent rekindled friendship is with my long lost pen pal, Jean-Jacques, who lives near Paris. Jean-Jacques and I became pen pals as a result of the Bluebelle tragedy. He was one of hundreds who wrote me, asking to be a pen pal. The difference was that the two of us stayed in touch for many years. Jean-Jacques even visited us in 1968, and we wrote for many years after that. He stayed the summer with us at my aunt and uncle’s home on Old Plank Road in De Pere. I think he had a crush on me.

  I also thought something had happened to Jean-Jacques as I could not find him. So I looked on Facebook and there he was, just as I remembered him but with white hair instead of brown. It amazes me that so many people have come into my life for various reasons, and that there is so much love. I feel very loved and probably wouldn’t be here otherwise.

  What I want to stress to all who read this book is never give up, always have hope, and try to look on the bright side of things. Be positive, be trusting, and try to go with the flow; have compassion, give of yourself to those in need, and be loving and kind. I believe that what you give comes back to you.

  Editor’s note: Tere Fassbender was named Employee of the Year for the State of Wisconsin DNR in 1993. It was but one reflection of the kind of person that she had managed to become – and of the kind of person she always was.

  EPILOGUE

  Legacy One

  On September 5, 2009, Tere’s daughter, Blaire, the daughter who calls her mom her hero, gave birth to a son. She named him Arthur, after Tere’s father who was never found but who has never been forgotten.

  Many years before, Tere had given her son the name Brian after her lost brother, and Tere’s cousin and an aunt and uncle named their daughters Jean René, after Tere’s mother and younger sister.

  Legacy Two

  “IO1, Miami report MC-1385 of 8 February 1962:

  RECOMMENDATIONS

  “… That consideration be given to amending the specifications for buoyant apparatus, life floats and life rafts (46 CFR 160.010, 160.018 and 160.027), to require that the body of such lifesaving equipment be painted or otherwise colored international orange.

  “… That consideration be given to amending the vessel inspection regulations to require that the body of buoyant apparatus, life rafts and life floats used on board vessels or artificial islands and fixed structures on the outer continental shelf, be painted or otherwise colored international orange.”

  The above recommendations appear at the very end of the Coast Guard report on the Bluebelle case. They were duly adopted by the Coast Guard and have been in force now for decades. It is not generally known that the widespread use of international orange that we now take for granted is due to the ordeal of a brave young girl from Green Bay alone and almost invisible on the high seas on a tiny white raft. Since that change was made, untold numbers of others who would have been lost at sea have been found.

  BIBLIOGRAPHY

  Information in this book was gleaned from many sources, some of which have been lost over the years since the author began compiling the material that eventually became this book. Among the sources are:

  Extensive interviews with Tere Duperrault Fassbender.

  Article by James Buchanan in Argosy magazine, The Five Puzzles of the Death of Capt. Julian A Harvey. March 1962.

  Article by Robert Barber, Miami Herald Sunday Magazine, Miami, Florida. Nov. 28, 1971.

  Article by Ruth Reynolds, Reading Eagle Magazine, Reading, Pennsylvania. June 23, 1963.

  Articles by Michael Blecha, Green Bay Press-Gazette, Green Bay, Wisconsin. 1994 and 1999.

  Article in Life magazine, The Bluebelle Mystery. Dec. 1, 1961.

  Article in Time magazine, The Sea: The Bluebelle’s Last Voyage. Dec. 1, 1961.

  Broward County Library, Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

  Broward County Sheriff’s Department, Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

  Brown County Library, Local History Section, Green Bay, Wisconsin.

  Cofrin Library Reference Department, University of Wisconsin-Green Bay, Green Bay, Wisconsin.

  Court record of Alachua County, Florida, 1945.

  Court record of Dade County, Florida, 1958, 1959.

  Court record of Hillsborough County, Florida, 1943.

  Dade County, Florida, Sheriff’s Department

  Discovery Channel-Canada, Tere Duperrault documentary coverage. 2005.

  Fort Lauderdale Police Department, Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

  Green Bay Press-Gazette articles, photographs, Green Bay, Wisc
onsin.

  Interview with Coast Guard officer Ernest Murdock, 1999.

  Interview with Coast Guard officer Robert Barber, 1992.

  Journals kept by Tere Duperrault Fassbender.

  Miami-Dade Public Library

  Miami Police Department

  NASA

  National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration weather records, November 1961.

  Research and interviews by Ben Funk, Associated Press reporter, Miami.

  Research and interviews by Gene Miller, reporter, Miami Herald.

  Transcripts and records of U.S. Coast Guard inquiries, testimony and interviews regarding the Bluebelle case.

  U.S. Coast Guard summary of Bluebelle case report.

  U.S. Department of the Air Force

  Weather records, U.S. Coast Guard office, Seventh District, Miami.

  Web site of the 329th Bomb Group, U.S. 8th Air Force.

  YouTube (film of Julian Harvey ditching the B-24)

  INDEX

  *Boldface type - photo

  Asian (freighter), 48

  Barber, U.S. Coast Guard Captain Robert

  announces rescue of Terry Jo Duperrault, 42, 46

  conducts Julian Harvey testimony, 30, 42

  conducts Terry Jo Duperrault testimony, 65-77, 95-102

  involvement in Torbatross case, 38, 141

  reacts to Julian Harvey testimony, 50

  Bluebelle (ketch)

  description, 12-15, 13

  Boozer, James

  explanation of Bluebelle tragedy, 56-59