Mindspeak

by Sunseri, Heather

  He was in love with me. Even though I couldn’t suppress what I was feeling for him, I had to find a way to keep him from knowing my every thought. A girl’s gotta have her secrets.

  I lined up the white ball and prepared to break while simultaneously concentrating on building a barrier around the inner workings of my brain—coating each thought, each worry, every question I still had with a protective shield.

  As I focused on those thoughts and questions, something strange began to happen. Instead of closing my mind off, it opened up. I sensed Jack’s presence. I didn’t hear his thoughts, but I smelled the scent of his shower gel. Felt the caress of his breath against the back of my neck. His mind knocked against that imaginary coat of armor I constructed.

  I shot the cue ball and missed the triangle of colorful balls completely. I whipped around. Jack still sat on the same barstool ten feet away.

  His lips curled into a smile. “Very good. You felt me tapping into your thoughts.” He stood and approached the table, proceeding to replace the white ball and break. He stepped close to me. This time, his breath was on my cheek as he said, “I’ll take the solids.”

  Slowly, a crack formed. Then just like that, all of my thoughts and worries spilled out.

  Jack frowned. “That’s enough for tonight. Let go, Lexi. It will come. At least now you know what it feels like when I enter your mind. Right?”

  I nodded. It was an invasion. Like someone broke into my locked chamber of secrets and stole my… everything, really.

  Jack sunk three more solids before he missed. He walked over to me, and grabbing my hand, he lifted it and kissed each knuckle. “Your turn.”

  I placed my hand on his chest and pushed him aside. How was I supposed to keep him out of my head when he flaunted those well-sculpted pectoral muscles around and kissed me at every turn?

  He backed up, chuckling under his breath.

  “Something amusing you?”

  Most definitely.

  I missed again. I was starting to see this game for what it was—an exercise in concentrating amidst heavy distractions. If I were truly going to keep Jack out of my head, I had to learn to control my mind subconsciously.

  “Who exactly is Seth?” I asked while I waited for my turn.

  Jack shot, sinking the red solid. “Seth is Sandra’s twin brother.”

  Twin? And I’m a clone of Sandra, so therefore... I gave my head a little shake. “He warned me away from you.”

  “Oh yeah? When?”

  “At the nursing home after Dad died. He told me you weren’t who you claimed to be.”

  “He was testing you.”

  “Testing me? How?”

  “He wanted to know if you would run. He was testing your strength.”

  “Did he have something to do with the cloning?”

  “No.” Jack leaned against the pool table. His eyes focused on some spot behind me for a moment before finding my eyes again. I attempted to erect the barrier around my mind again, and believed it was working. Jack continued, “Seth found me when we arrived in Kentucky. He convinced my mother and father that he could take my medical training further. For some reason, they trusted him. Of course, my father knew him, but I didn’t know that at the time.”

  “Since they trusted him, and because of your thirst for knowledge, you what? Let him take your home schooling further?”

  A line formed between Jack’s eyes. “Something like that.”

  Something about Jack’s body language told me I needed to tread lightly where Seth was concerned.

  I tried, but failed to suppress a yawn.

  “You’re tired.” He took my stick from me and placed it on the rack against the wall. He returned and boxed me in against the pool table, placing a hand on either side of my hips. “Bedtime.” He reached a hand and trailed a finger down my cheek, across my lower lip, and down my throat. He leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. The touch was firm; his lips were warm. He slid his fingers through the belt loops of my jeans. His hips pressed into mine.

  My head went all woozy, and I couldn’t process a single thought. Even if only temporary, I forgot everything related to the cloning, genetic manipulation, and murder. My hand snaked around his neck and I threaded my fingers into his hair.

  The connection between us deepened, and I found myself wanting more. So much more.

  But the timing was all wrong.

  He pulled back. His forehead leaned against mine. We were both short of breath, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to stop.

  “I’ll walk you to your room. I want to try something.”

  I raised an eyebrow.

  “Stop it. Nothing like that. I’m shocked at how your mind works, Miss Matthews.” He fake-gasped. “I had no idea the places you would allow your thoughts to roam.” He shook his head.

  “What did you have in mind?” I was sure my cheeks darkened three shades.

  “I want to try to heal your shoulder and see if I can control the nausea after.”

  I suppressed a look of disappointment. I did need my shoulder in order to swim. And I didn’t want our relationship to go further than it already had. Not now. Not yet. Our complicated existence was based on questionable morals as it was.

  But the way he looked at me right now. I’d let him do anything. Well, almost anything.

  I felt Jack’s mind push against mine. A slight nudge. I had done it. I had blocked him out.

  I looked up at him and smiled. I was very satisfied with myself. I’d won a small victory.

  “Very good.” But now, I really want to know what you just blocked from me.

  ~~~~

  I woke with a start to the smell of cigarette smoke.

  I sat up and rubbed my eyes. A trail of smoke hovered by the open door to the DeWeeses’ guest room like a thick fog.

  Jack didn’t smoke, and no one else should be here. I threw the covers back, and after slipping out of bed, I padded toward the door. The fog slowly drifted out. I ran my fingers along the door, brushing the doorknob. I was certain I had closed the door before I crawled in bed.

  The smoke tickled my nose. I followed it down the stairs, through the house and out the back door.

  Strange. The alarm didn’t sound. Then I remembered the electricity had been out.

  I stepped lightly across the patio and down the steps toward the pool. A figure lounged in a chair facing the deep end of the pool. He lifted his hand and took a drag of his cigarette.

  “Who are you?” My voice came out hoarse.

  “You know who I am, Lexi.”

  I tilted my head. His voice did sound familiar. His. A boy.

  “How about a swim?” He gestured with his hand toward the pool. It was lit up by a large light at the deep end.

  Without thinking, I walked over to the edge of the pool. Instinct told me I should check the water temperature, but as I started to dip a toe in, the voice behind me said, “Go on. Jump in. You’re an excellent swimmer, Lexi.” My name rolled off the edge of his tongue.

  I shrugged. Why not? I was an excellent swimmer.

  I bent my knees and jumped, swan diving into the deep end of the pool.

  The freezing temperature of the water hit my skin like a billion tiny needles.

  I opened my eyes and looked around. It was dark. Someone had turned off the light. I couldn’t breathe.

  Against all instincts, I sucked in a breath. Instead of air, I inhaled water. My lungs burned from the icy temperature of the liquid that slid down my throat. I twisted and turned, thrashing in the water. My limbs refused to work the way I knew they were capable. I labored for another breath.

  Finally, I stilled. I was surrounded by darkness and calm. My body was numb, and I was no longer able to take a breath.

  Chapter Twenty

  I gagged. I coughed. Water spewed from my mouth. I threw up. A voice I recognized but couldn’t quite place said in a soothing tone, “That’s it. Get it out.”

  I sucked in a long, labored breath. The back of my thro
at burned like I’d swallowed thumbtacks.

  Why was I wet?

  I coughed again and continued to fight for air.

  The ground around me was hard. I shivered in the breeze. Finally, I opened my eyes to the face of Seth Whitmeyer.

  My body tensed. I looked side to side for Jack. How did I get here? Why was I outside?

  “Sarah, can you hear me?”

  I stared at Seth. My eyes must have been huge. “Please don’t hurt me,” I whispered.

  “Hurt you?” He pulled the sweater over his head and laid it over my chest close to my neck. “I’m not here to hurt you, Sarah. But why on earth did you dive into that pool?”

  Why did he insist on calling me by my real name? I turned my head toward the pool. Confused, I looked to the opposite side at the lounge chairs. “Someone was here. A man. With a cigarette.”

  “No one else is here.” I moved to sit up. Seth supported my back. “Let’s get you inside and into some warm clothes.”

  As Seth helped me toward the back door, I glanced over my shoulder toward the chairs again. Jack really hadn’t told me much about Seth yet. Other than Seth had taught him things about our fathers’ research. Still I feared him. Seeing him now, I realized we looked similar. Did my DNA make me his sister? “Why are you here? I thought the farm was secure.”

  “It is secure. I’ve been here all night. In the guest house mainly.”

  I stopped and pulled away from him, barely able to stand on my own two feet. “Where’s Jack?”

  “He wasn’t feeling well. He’s sleeping off the earlier medical treatment he provided your shoulder.”

  My heart sunk. So it didn’t work. Healing me made him sick.

  “Inside, Lexi.” He gestured toward the door. “You and I have a lot to talk about. But first… warm clothes.”

  ~~~~

  Shouting erupted from the direction of the kitchen as I descended the stairs. A hot shower and some warm clothes felt nice, but I still shivered from the sound of the Smoking Man telling me to take a swim.

  Was Smoking Man inside my head? How did he convince me to do jump in that pool?

  “Why haven’t you told her?” Seth sounded irate.

  “I told her a lot, Seth. It was overwhelming for her.”

  “Bullshit, Jack. She shares the same blood, the same heart, and practically the same mind as my sister. She can handle the truth. You should have taken her directly to The Program. I’d have met you there.”

  Silence. The Program? Why would I go there? What had Jack not told me? Was he no longer sick? He was ill for days after mending my broken arm.

  We’re in the kitchen, Lexi. Eavesdropping is not very lady-like.

  Crap! Would I ever be able to keep him out of my head?

  I passed in front of the living room windows as I stepped lightly toward the kitchen. The sun was just beginning to rise over a distant hill behind the farm.

  I pushed open the swinging door and faced the harsh lights of the kitchen, the electricity having recovered from the storms. Anita busied herself by the sink. Jack leaned up against the island holding a coffee mug.

  “You okay?” I asked Jack as calmly as I could before I addressed my confusion regarding Seth Whitmeyer.

  He nodded. It wasn’t as bad this time.

  Seth sat at the kitchen table by the windows. Completely relaxed, he poured cream into a mug, picked up a spoon, and stirred. He looked at home, like he’d sat in that very spot a thousand times.

  He did not look like a man who had just saved a teen-aged girl from the bottom of a swimming pool.

  Why is Seth Whitmeyer here?

  He pushed off the island and stepped toward me.

  “Want some tea or coffee, sweetie?” Anita asked from behind him.

  “I would love some tea. Thank you.” My eyes fixed on Jack’s. He ignored my unspoken question.

  “How are you feeling?” Jack brushed his fingers against my hairline and down my temple with his free hand.

  Answer me.

  Jack smiled. You first.

  I’m fine. Why is Seth Whitmeyer here? He pulled me out of a freaking pool, Jack.

  “Lexi, come sit.” Seth kicked out a chair from the table for me.

  I walked cautiously toward Seth. Placed my hands on the table in front of him, my fingers spread wide. “When we first met, you told me Jack wasn’t who he said he was. What did you mean?”

  One side of Seth’s mouth quirked into a crooked smile. “Exactly that. Do you remember what you knew about him then?”

  I tilted my head to the side. “I guess.”

  “Does what I said then mesh with what he told you yesterday?”

  I squinted my eyes. “But you meant to scare me.”

  “Did it? Scare you, that is?” He raised both eyebrows. “Not like your recent early-morning swim, I’m sure.”

  Anita approached the table. “Here’s your tea, sweetie.” She smiled. I had yet to figure out Anita’s role, other than to take care of the DeWeeses. And of Jack.

  I walked around the table and sat in a chair across from Seth, rather than the one directly beside him. Very mature.

  Jack sat beside me. He reached across and took my hand in his. “What were you doing out by the pool?”

  I shrugged. “I don’t know. I… don’t remember.” Sleepwalking, I guess?

  You practically drowned.

  “Is this the first time this has happened?” Seth asked, looking from me to Jack. “The sleepwalking?”

  Jack shook his head. “No.” He gave my hand a squeeze. “It happened a couple of times before, that I know of.”

  Am I supposed to trust this yahoo?

  “Yes.” You can trust him. Mostly.

  “What?” Seth asked, confused by our mostly silent exchange.

  Unable to sit still, I pulled my hand away from Jack’s. “Look, Seth. I see that Jack trusts you. But—”

  “You don’t.”

  “No. I don’t.” I crossed my arms. “Why would I? My father was blown up in a car, and next thing I know you corner me in my grandmother’s nursing home room and threaten me.”

  “He did what?”

  “I didn’t threaten her.” He exhaled dramatically. “This isn’t child’s play. We have work to do, and we’re getting nowhere rehashing old news.”

  “Lexi, Seth would like for us both to go straight to The Program from here.”

  “What do you mean? The Program is an actual place? I thought you attended The Program through some online portal.”

  “I do but it’s also a place. Near University of Kentucky’s campus. A secured facility that is run by Seth.”

  I squeezed my eyes closed. The Program is Seth’s way of furthering your homeschooling?

  Yes.

  “I’m not going to The Program. I never had any intention of applying to The Program. You know that.”

  “What? Why not?” Seth asked. “Did your dad know this?”

  “No. Never got the chance to tell him.”

  “You know he would not approve, right?”

  “Do I know that?” Who was this guy? “Dad never even mentioned you to me. Or your sister for that matter.” I practically spit out the word sister. “So, for argument’s sake, we’ll just assume that I no longer know or care what my dad would think of my intentions.” Dad had often threatened to move me at the slightest hint of trouble in the past.

  “You were meant for The Program, Lexi. You’d be safe there. Friday night and this morning prove that you and Jack are not safe. We can protect you inside The Program.”

  Stop saying you can keep me safe. “What do you mean I was meant for The Program?”

  Jack ran his hands through his hair.

  “You and Jack were genetically engineered for a specific purpose eighteen years ago. If the wrong people were to find either of you, I’m afraid they would destroy you. Or worse, use you for their own purpose.”

  “Destroy. You mean kill?”

  He nodded. Jack’s face paled. />
  “What about you? You think we should hide inside The Program?” I asked Jack, knowing I had no intention of getting anywhere near a secure facility run by Seth Whitmeyer. When he didn’t respond, I asked, “What do your parents say? John is my guardian, after all.”

  Seth’s lips curved into a smirk. “You’re so much like her.”

  “I assume by her you mean your sister? Where is Sandra?” A shudder moved through me at the thought of facing the woman who’d cloned me. The woman whose DNA I possessed.

  “She is nothing like her,” Jack whispered. He suddenly stood and faced me. “Yes, unfortunately, I think we should be at The Program. My parents will agree.”

  “What about Wellington? We can’t just leave. The Dean will have everyone from the local police to Homeland Security looking for us.” I was being a bit dramatic.

  “Not if my father signs the necessary forms,” Jack answered.

  “You can’t be serious.” I’m not going into The Program.

  “I’m dead serious.” Jack stuffed his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. “You jumped into a freezing pool. That wouldn’t happen inside the Program.” We have to figure out who’s inside your head, and you need to learn how to shut them out.

  But Jack, it would mean learning from and agreeing with what these scientists did to create us. It would mean giving up control.

  Learning from, yes. We need to know what we were created to do. We—you and I—can choose what we do with that knowledge.

  “Why wouldn’t we be safe at Wellington?” I stepped closer to Jack and tugged on one of his arms. As I did, I concentrated on building a barrier around my thoughts. This conversation was not going my way, and if I had to run from them both, I would. “You can teach me.”

  “No.” Seth’s voice shot up an octave. “You’re both coming to The Program. That’s final. Now, go pack your things.”

  I backed away from both of them with a mental shield in place.

  What are you thinking? Jack’s thoughts were panicked.

  It was working, but I didn’t know how to block him and direct a thought at him at the same time. I had so much to learn, and for the first time in my life I had someone who could teach me. But at what cost?