Forty and Free: A Sweet Romance Series Bundle - Books 5 - 8

by Blake, Lillianna

“One day you’ll feel the same about your heartbreak.” She took a bite of her sandwich.

  “I will.” He met her eyes across the table. “I am very grateful to be right here, with you.”

  As they continued their lunch Chase tried to think of ways to show her just how much he appreciated her.

  Once they finished he offered her his hand. “Let’s take a walk around the property. I want to check a few things out.”

  “Okay.” She left the dishes and followed him down the back steps. “I haven’t really gotten all the way to the edge of the property.”

  “It’s a great day to, with the sun shining and a nice cool breeze.”

  “Yes, it is.” She wrapped her arm around his and remained close to him as they walked.

  “What made you choose this ranch?”

  “Price, mostly. It was something I could afford, in a place I’d never been before.”

  “I wish I could make decisions that easily.”

  “It’s easy—when you don’t mind leaving everything behind.”

  He looked up at the wide, clear sky and drew a deep breath. “I honestly don’t see how anyone could leave this. I’ve been in love with this place since I was a kid. I can’t imagine anywhere else feeling like home.”

  “It’s where you belong.” She smiled at him.

  “Is it where you belong too?” He looked over at her.

  “I think so. It’s certainly growing on me. But that could be because of the good company.”

  “Ah, I see. Well, I’m happy to be good company. But just give it a few more weeks and this place will be in your blood. Look at this.” He crouched down and dug his fingertips through some dirt and rocks. He found what shimmered in the sunlight and pulled it out to show her.

  “It’s beautiful.” She held out her hand and he dropped the gemstone into her palm. “What would it be doing all the way out here?”

  “Some people bury them at the edges of their property. For some it’s just a tradition, for others it’s a sacred ritual. It’s meant to give added protection. That’s probably what it is, since we’re near the edge of your land.”

  “Well, then we should put it back.” She crouched down and buried it once more.

  “Tradition or ritual?” He crouched down beside her.

  “My philosophy is, I will take all the luck I can get.” She laughed.

  The way she threw her head back as she laughed revealed something he’d never noticed before. A thick dark jagged scar jutted up past her high collar. Without thinking he reached out to lightly touch it.

  “What’s this?”

  She pushed his hand away in a playful but firm gesture. “It’s just a relic of my past.” She straightened up and took his hand again as she turned back toward the house. “Wow, I can’t believe how far we’ve walked. What am I ever going to do with all this property?”

  “I’m sure you’ll think of something great.”

  She closed her eyes and grew quite still. He mirrored her silence to prevent interrupting whatever thoughts she’d slipped into. When she opened her eyes again she wore a wide smile.

  “Where did you go?” He brushed his lips against her cheek in a light kiss.

  “I closed my eyes and tried to imagine what it might have been like when Marianna lived here. I don’t think it would have been much different. It’s odd to think that the same trees, the same patch of sky, surrounded her so long ago.”

  “I’m just glad this place has fallen into the right hands. I’m sure you will honor her memory here. You already have by sheltering Toby.”

  “Speaking of Toby, I think we’d better get him out to exercise.”

  “Good idea. But first, let’s give the trees something to remember.” He wrapped his arm around her waist and turned her toward him.

  Her eyes fell shut as he approached her for a kiss. In that moment, she looked more serene than he’d ever seen her.

  He offered her a soft slow kiss that he hoped would be as permanent as the roots of the trees beneath the ground that they stood on.

  Chapter 25

  As connected as Hope felt to the land after walking it, she felt even more connected to Chase as he held her close and kissed her. It was as if their bodies had no beginning and no end. He drifted around her and within her, all at once.

  She pulled back and looked into his eyes. Words sprang to her lips that she resisted speaking. He wasn’t ready to hear them, but she was sure ready to say them. Would he ever be ready to say them back?

  As she held his gaze she stroked her fingertips along the curves and rise of his face, tenderly caressing each subtle ridge and valley.

  He returned her stare, still, as he allowed her to explore his features. When her fingers stroked along his lips he offered a light kiss. Her heart skipped a beat at the sensation. It drew her attention from his eyes to his mouth and a moment later she replaced her fingertips with her lips.

  As the connection reignited between them, she was certain that this moment would be permanently intertwined with what she thought of as sacred—a force that blended between him, her, and the nature that surrounded them.

  She broke the kiss and wrapped her arms around him. As she pressed her cheek against his shoulder, she held him as tight as she could. It occurred to her that she finally had something to lose again. She didn’t ever want to see him walk away. Yet she had to be aware that it could be a very real possibility. He had become everything to her, but she wasn’t that for him. Not yet.

  His hand stroked down through her hair in subtle slow movements that soothed the rawness of her desire for him. Though they didn’t speak, it seemed to her that he understood why she clung to him, and he, in turn, attempted to reassure her with his touch.

  “Toby is waiting.” She murmured her words against the smooth surface of his shirt. She wanted to add, “So am I,” but she knew that wouldn’t be fair to him. She released him from her embrace and he laced his fingers through hers.

  “I’m not sure I can move my feet from this spot.” He grinned. “I’ve never felt so grounded before.”

  “I don’t think it’s the spot.” She winked at him, then tugged him back toward the stable.

  Toby was eager to greet them. He snorted and bucked with excitement.

  “That’s one thing I like about animals. They’re not afraid to show exactly how they feel. No bashfulness, no trying to hold back to impress anyone else,” said Chase.

  “Yes, it is relaxing to be around them. Sometimes I think they know more about life and death than we ever could. We’re so distracted by material things, but animals…they’re pure instinct and survival. They know the flow and rhythm of the earth,” said Hope.

  “I think you may be right about that. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in life and never surface. How did you figure it out?”

  Hope led Toby out into the paddock and as they began to walk she glanced over at Chase. “I was in a hospital bed, too tired to even watch television. I closed my eyes and I heard the beep of the machine next to me. It monitored my heartbeat. It occurred to me that I had no idea what my heartbeat actually sounded like. I asked a nurse if I could use a stethoscope to listen to it. She helped me get it in the right place. After that, I listened to it when I was too tired to do anything else. When I didn’t think I had the strength to go on, I listened to it. I never really thought about not listening to my own heartbeat.” She reached out and rested her hand on his chest. “It’s unique, special to each one of us. Have you ever listened to yours?”

  “I don’t think I have.” He caught her hand and brought it up to his lips. “But I know that it’s beating a lot quicker when I’m standing here with you.”

  “Hm, maybe it’s trying to send you some kind of message?” She quirked an eyebrow.

  “Oh, I definitely think it is. I’m just not quite clear on the message.” He stepped closer to her. “Oh, now it’s a little faster.” He leaned close to her lips. “Even faster.”

  “And now?” She presse
d her lips to his. After a quick kiss she pulled away.

  He stared at her with a slow smile. “Oh, the message is very clear now.”

  Toby tugged so hard that Hope almost lost her grip on the reins. She stumbled and tightened her grip.

  Chase caught her by the shoulders and steadied her. “I guess Toby wants our attention.”

  “Maybe we should let him walk on his own a little? Maybe he’s ready?” said Hope.

  “I don’t know. If he gets overeager his leg could buckle on him.”

  “How will we know when he’s ready if we don’t let him try?”

  He shook his head. “It’s a big risk.”

  “Feel.” She rested her hand against the horse’s chest.

  Chase placed his hand beside hers.

  “What does his heart tell you?” asked Hope.

  He nodded slowly. “Yes, it does feel like he’s ready. I guess we could let him try.”

  “Don’t worry, trust his instincts.” She took his hand in hers, then released the reins.

  Toby took off without a second glance. He trotted at first, then slowed to a walk.

  Hope leaned close to Chase. “See, he feels the weakness and he’s being careful.”

  “I see that.” He nodded as the horse began to pick up speed again. “I just hope he doesn’t push too hard, too fast.”

  “You can trust him, Chase. He’s survived a lot, and he knows how to make smart choices. Look.” She pointed out how he slowed as he turned. “He’s taking it easy on the leg.”

  “Wow, I never imagined that he would heal so fast.”

  “Neither did I. But he craves that freedom. I guess if you truly have a desire for something, you will do anything to get it.”

  “Yes.” He squeezed her hand. “I think that’s true.”

  Together they watched the horse gallop around the paddock. Hope couldn’t help but think that their nurturing had done more healing than the bandages themselves. She knew that her time with Chase had certainly helped her to heal and to dream again—that there might be a new life unfolding before her. She decided to let go of her worries about Karen. He was there with her, and that was all that mattered.

  “He’s tiring out now.” She drew her hand from his and walked over to the horse to take the reins.

  Chase followed behind her. She heard his even footsteps. When she grasped the reins, he paused a few steps away. She held her breath as she sensed him move closer. She didn’t have to see his face to know that his arms were about to encircle her.

  He nuzzled his lips through her hair and placed a light kiss on the curve of her neck. “I wish I could stay in this moment forever.”

  “If we did, we might never make it to another—just as good—moment.” She sighed and turned in his arms to face him. “Chase, I never thought that I’d have a moment like this. So I’ll take it, and I suppose I’m a little greedy, but I want many, many more.”

  “If you’re greedy, then I am too.” He kissed her, then pulled away. “But I need to get going. I have to drop in on some animals at the clinic and then get ready for the busy schedule tomorrow morning. It’s clear that Toby doesn’t need me to check in on him.”

  “But I do.” She smiled as she looked into his eyes. “If you don’t mind.”

  “I don’t mind at all.” He grinned and kissed her forehead.

  They led Toby back to the stable.

  Once he was settled, Chase headed for his car.

  Hope watched him drive away and wondered if he’d always find a way to retreat, or if he’d eventually give up on trying to escape. No matter what she thought about his past, their present was more intense than anything she’d ever experienced. That couldn’t be nothing.

  The way she felt for him only grew stronger every time she saw him. That couldn’t be nothing either.

  Chapter 26

  Chase closed the door to his house and took a deep breath of the familiar air. It was strange how he still found pockets of her scent around the house—on the couch, on his pillow, and sometimes on an old sweatshirt of his that she’d worn. They were the surprise reminders of Karen that threw him off the most.

  Today, however, when he leaned back against the thick wooden door, he didn’t think about those surprise reminders. He thought about her—about Hope.

  He thought about how much strength it must have taken for her to sit there and listen to him go on about his ex. She didn’t once make him feel guilty about it. He wasn’t sure if that was because she was the kindest soul on earth, or if it was because she truly didn’t care about his past. Either way, he admired her for it.

  He thought about everything he knew about her. The struggle she’d endured, while recovering from cancer essentially alone, was one he wasn’t sure he would have survived. Yet, she’d made it through and had even seemed to maintain her positive attitude.

  He wasn’t blind. He sensed that she wanted more from him. He wished that he could give it to her. If there was anything that he could do to change the way that he felt about Karen, he would in a second. If he could somehow erase the parts of him that still longed for her, they’d already be gone. But so far, that had been impossible. He’d tried and failed more than once.

  As he walked back toward his room to take a shower, he tried to put any thoughts about the past behind him.

  The hot water caressed his skin and he willed it to wash away whatever still clung to him.

  Hope was there, right in front of him, willing to do just about anything to be with him. He adored her, he wanted to spend all his time with her, and yet his heart froze at the thought of speaking those three little words to her.

  He’d been hesitant to speak them to Karen as well. In fact, when he’d finally professed his love to her, he’d been covered in sweat and not at all certain what her response would be. To his surprise, she’d said it back. That had been enough to make him think that the world had finally turned in his favor.

  In time, though, he would discover that it had been nothing more than a cruel joke. If he’d had more sense, maybe he would have noticed the way she’d spent the majority of her time talking about work, politics, and anything else she could use to distract herself from the way she did or didn’t feel about him.

  When it’s over, it’s over. That was what Chase was trying to believe. But he had to admit that a part of him still held out hope that Karen would come to her senses and return home. As much as he wished he didn’t feel that way, he couldn’t change it.

  He sank down on the couch and pressed his fingertips against his temples. More and more he was thinking of Hope instead of Karen. But his thoughts could be troubling. At least Hope had been patient with him—so far.

  He stood up and walked into the kitchen. As he passed by the key caddy on the counter he noticed that Karen’s set of keys to the office were still there. He’d made her a set in case of emergencies and also to show her that she was a part of everything in his life. He snatched them up and shoved them in a drawer. No more reminders. He wanted his mind to be as clear as possible.

  When his phone rang he pulled it out of his pocket to answer it without checking to see who it was first.

  “Hello?”

  “Chase, it’s Adrienne. There’s a problem at the clinic.”

  “I’ll be right in.” He hung up the phone and headed out the door.

  When he arrived at the clinic he found Adrienne waiting out front for him.

  “What is it? Is it one of the animals?”

  “No, at least not one of ours. But someone just dropped off this friendly group.” She gestured to a large box beside her.

  Chase peered inside and discovered six small piglets.

  “Who dropped them off?”

  “I don’t know. The truck was gone by the time I got out here.”

  “Well, they look pretty healthy at least.” He reached in and stroked the tops of their heads. “Let’s get them inside and checked out.”

  “Absolutely. But there’s no way we can keep
them here. The clinic is already overrun. There just isn’t room for six piglets. What are we going to do with them?”

  “I’ll make some calls. Maybe someone can take them in, at least for a little while.”

  He picked up the box and carried it into the clinic. After he checked out the piglets and found them in good health he created a small pen out of things around the clinic for them to roam in. Then he sat down at his desk and began to make phone calls. The few people who picked up informed him that there was no room at their farms, despite the fact that he assured them that the piglets were in good health. After he’d called the last number on his list, he knew there was only one other person that he could call. He dialed Hope’s number.

  She answered in a cheerful tone. “Hi, Chase.”

  “Hi. I’m in a bit of a predicament.”

  “Oh, really? What’s wrong?”

  “I have six piglets here that have been abandoned and no room for them at the clinic.”

  “So you want to bring them here?”

  “Only if you’re okay with it.”

  “I’ve never taken care of piglets before.”

  “I can help you with that. It’s pretty easy. It won’t be permanent—only until we can find them a home.”

  “Okay, sure. Bring them right over.”

  “You’re okay with it?”

  “Yes, of course. Anything I can do to help.”

  “Great.” Chase sighed with relief. “Thanks, Hope. You’re a life saver.”

  Chapter 27

  It was almost dark when Chase arrived with the piglets. Hope saw him lumber up the driveway with the large box in his hands and met him at the top of it. The squealing creatures won her heart in an instant.

  “Oh, they’re so cute! I never realized how cute piglets are.”

  “They are cute and not too hard to care for. I can rig up a pen in the stable with Toby that should work for now.”

  “Perfect.”

  As Chase gave her the instructions on how to care for the pigs, she realized that she loved being available to the abandoned animals. They needed attention and love, and she had it to give.