Fates Entwined

by Caethes Faron

  Yes, this would all work out perfectly.

  * * *

  Chapter 29

  Jocelyn admired the pearl ring. It hadn’t left her finger since Michael had placed it there. Every time she caught sight of it, her stomach fluttered, and a smile tugged at her lips. It served as a momentary distraction from her loneliness.

  She pulled the lace curtain back from her bedroom window and viewed the street below. She wasn’t looking for anything in particular. Perhaps she secretly hoped that if she looked enough, she’d see Michael standing there. Ever since he had left for Dover, she had missed him terribly. She knew his trip was necessary, but that didn’t keep her from wishing he hadn’t had to leave. They wouldn’t be apart for too long. He could make the journey in two days. Surely it couldn’t take much time to tell his family the news and make preparations for them to join him in London for the wedding. It wouldn’t be long at all.

  On the other hand, Jocelyn had her own responsibilities. Actually, she only had one: tell Lawrence. It was difficult to both wish for more time to tell Lawrence and for Michael to return quickly. The two desires were at odds.

  Jocelyn paced around her room. Where would they live once they were married? Michael didn’t have a London residence. He wasn’t close enough to the king to warrant rooms at court, but Jocelyn might be. James would surely make provisions for them if needed, especially since he wanted them nearby. With her help, Michael could become one of the king’s trusted advisors. His holdings and status would certainly make his voice valuable.

  That didn’t really answer her first question. Would they move into her home? She didn’t think Michael would appreciate living in a house she had earned whoring. Then again, Michael was practical. It was the easiest course of action to take as well as the most frugal. If a war with Spain came to fruition, it would be wise for them to have money on hand for unforeseen expenses. Besides, Jocelyn wasn’t the only one Michael would be providing for. No need to divert money from the Dover estate to a new London household.

  Jocelyn stopped. What if Michael’s family wanted to move to court? James had indicated they would be welcome. It was the best place for Margaret to be. Surely she would want to marry again for the security of her children. Until Jocelyn provided an heir, their future would remain uncertain.

  Her knees weakened, and she sat in a chair. A baby. Jocelyn wasn’t ready to have a child any time soon. She knew Michael didn’t expect to treat her like a breeding mare, but there were other people’s futures at stake. Dear Lord, her stomach felt queasy at the thought.

  No, she would simply insist Michael’s family move to court. It was never too early to arrange marriages for the girls, and Margaret needed to make herself known. If something should happen to Michael, it would benefit Margaret to have the favor of James and his court.

  That would mean either buying a house for Margaret and her children, as well as Michael’s mother, or all living together. It had been quite a while since Jocelyn had lived with other people. A household that large couldn’t fit in her current residence. They would have to find someplace else. It was increasingly likely that Jocelyn would be leaving her home.

  All of these thoughts only served to distract her from the thought that mattered. The only task she had while Michael was away was to tell Lawrence. She should be thinking of how to go about it. Any other concerns could wait until Michael returned, and she could discuss them with him.

  Lawrence would be upset once he found out she was getting married. There was no way around it. He had always made his feelings on the subject clear, as had she. However, there was a tiny corner of Jocelyn’s heart that hoped Lawrence would be happy for her. It seemed supremely unlikely, but she refused to completely abandon hope. It was that hope that made telling him so difficult. If she accepted that he would not welcome the news, no matter how finely presented, then it wouldn’t matter how she told him. She had made her decision. She had chosen Michael over Lawrence.

  Tears pricked her eyes. No matter what happened, someone was going to be hurt. There was no way to escape it. Jocelyn was giving up the man who had been a father to her. The only man she’d ever trusted, ever loved. What did it say about her that she was so easily coaxed into turning away from the man who had given her everything? Of course Lawrence would despise her. She despised herself for her disloyalty.

  Then again, Lawrence could choose to accept her decision and still be part of her life. If only she could convince him that she wasn’t being taken away from him, that Michael wasn’t going to turn her into a forsaken woman. If only Lawrence knew Michael the way she did. She couldn’t remedy that now. If she tried to postpone telling him until he got to know Michael better, he would see right through her. It wasn’t as if she was a woman who ever entertained suitors. If she tried to arrange for Lawrence to spend more time with Michael, there could only be one reason for it, and Lawrence wasn’t daft.

  The only solution was to tell Lawrence she had accepted Michael’s offer of marriage, that it was settled and promised, and there would be no turning back. Then, if he could find it in his heart to trust her despite the fact that she had done the one thing she had promised never to do, she could go about introducing Michael to him. She needed to give Lawrence time to see that Michael was an honorable man who loved her. His sincerity was apparent in every action he took and every word he spoke to her. Once Lawrence saw that, he would have to be happy for her. Once he realized how much Michael respected her, how he wasn’t asking her to give up any part of herself, he would come around. He had to.

  Jocelyn took a deep breath. The sooner she told him, the better. Easier to toss medicine back than to sip at it. She could handle the consequences.

  * * *

  Chapter 30

  “Your return was a bit of a surprise. We would have prepared better had we known.”

  “I don’t need any fuss, Mother.” Michael sat at the dinner table with his mother and Margaret. He had only been home for a few hours, and he already longed to be back with Jocelyn.

  “It’s your first time gracing these halls as an earl. A little fuss wouldn’t hurt anyone.”

  Michael smiled. It was easy to forget his new status, especially when there were more exciting developments.

  “Is there any news from court, other than you being an earl now?” Margaret eyed him with curiosity. It was nice to see her taking an interest, no matter how small, in the goings on of the world.

  “Yes, actually, some rather big news. I’m to be married.”

  Mother gasped and clapped her hands. “To whom?”

  “Mistress Jocelyn Parker.”

  “Who?” Mother appeared genuinely perplexed.

  Margaret set her jaw in a firm line that matched her hardened eyes. “Mistress Jocelyn Parker? Is this the same woman who has been in the bed of every man at court? The same woman Richard told me wormed her way into court by whoring?”

  Michael had never considered that Richard might have known Jocelyn or that his sister-in-law would know who she was. “Margaret, I will not have you speak that way about my betrothed.”

  “So she is the same woman? I’m not mistaken?”

  Michael took a breath. It would serve no one for him to lose his temper. “No, you are not mistaken. However, you paint a very deceiving portrait of her. Have you ever even met Jocelyn? I didn’t think you ever accompanied Richard to court.”

  “No, I’ve never met her. I would never be in the same room as such a woman.”

  “Then I’m afraid you’ll find life very difficult. Jocelyn is a fine lady. She has made her way in the world the only way she could. Everyone at court respects her. The king, Buckingham, Thomas Wentworth, they all hold her in high esteem. Not to mention the fact that I’m in love with her.”

  “I think it’s wonderful you’ve found someone to spend your life with, dear.”

  “Thank you, Mother.”

  “How did the king even agree to allow an earl to marry a woman like her? Surely she is better
fit to be a mistress.” Margaret twisted her face as if she had tasted something sour.

  “As I said, Margaret, the king has great affection for her. He’s delighted that we’re to be married. I sought his permission, and he granted it without reservation. If there was anything inappropriate about the arrangement, he could have easily denied my request. As it is, I think you should trust my judgment, and if you cannot trust mine, then trust that of your king.”

  “I suppose I’m not being given any choice.”

  “No, you are not. You know I love you like a sister, Margaret, but I am not going to change my marriage plans because of opinions you hold, especially when such opinions have been formed based on hearsay.”

  “Are you implying Richard lied to me?”

  “Of course not. I’m implying that Richard didn’t know her very well. Why would he? He would have never employed her services himself, and he was never around court long enough to know her beyond merest acquaintance.”

  “After everything your father worked for, after everything Richard did to maintain his legacy, you are going to dishonor it all by marrying so far beneath yourself? By bringing a whore into your ancestral home?”

  Anger boiled inside Michael. He shot to his feet, knocking his chair over and slamming his palm against the table. “You will hold your tongue, or you will leave this table. Jocelyn will be mistress of this house soon, and I will not tolerate a word against her.”

  His eyes bore into Margaret’s. Her brown eyes were firm, resolute. With measured movements, she stood and left the dining hall. Once she was no longer in sight, Michael hung his head. A servant righted his chair, and he sank into it.

  “I’m sorry, Mother. I should not have lost my temper.”

  “She was out of line. It’s hard on her, being dependent on you. Her life is not moving in the direction she had thought it would.”

  “And mine is?”

  “No, but you’re getting a happy ending, aren’t you? It’s natural for her to be envious. Her opinion shouldn’t matter to you. This has far more to do with her own conflicted feelings than anything else.”

  Michael felt a pang of regret for his temper. He needed to allow Margaret some latitude. “How has she been faring?”

  “She’s at the point where the pain of Richard’s passing has lessened enough that she’s thinking of moving forward with her life, but then she catches herself and tortures herself with guilt.”

  “I hope she’ll change her mind about my marriage. I want you all to attend.”

  “So it’s to be in London then?”

  “Yes. Not only is it her home, but it would be beneficial to have much of the court attend. Getting married in London will serve to establish ourselves in the peerage. I imagine there are others who feel as Margaret does. I’m not going to whisk Jocelyn away to be wed in secret.”

  “Of course not. We’ll all be there.”

  “I have thought this through, Mother. Not only do I love her, but she can also help us. Margaret and the girls will benefit from her influence. I want to secure strong betrothals for my nieces and a good match for Margaret. I’m not only doing this for myself. You know I would never do anything to harm the family.”

  “Yes, I do know it. So tell me about my future daughter-in-law. She must be beautiful.” She resumed eating, continuing on with the meal as if Margaret weren’t absent.

  Michael smiled as he pictured Jocelyn in his mind. “She is, but her beauty is subtle. It’s really her mind that sets her apart. She has a way about her. When she’s talking to you, she makes you feel like you’re the most important person in the world, as if nothing could draw her attention away from you. When you get past the front she puts forth for politics’ sake, you discover a keen intellect. She can analyze any situation, provide commentary on recent events, speak intelligently on almost any subject. She has the unique viewpoint of someone who was born into abject poverty but regularly converses with kings, dukes, and earls. Put her in a room with any member of the privy council, and she’ll not only be at ease, she’ll be listened to. I know Margaret says she’s a whore, and I suppose, strictly speaking, she’s correct, but it’s not just her body that interests men. That’s not what men see when they look at her. She is valued for her mind.”

  “A rarity for a woman.”

  “Yes. It’s one of the many things that make her remarkable. She’s the only person I’ve ever been able to talk to about what’s inside my heart. When I’m with her, I’m free.” He locked eyes with his mother, hoping she recognized the sincerity of his words. He saw pure love shining back at him.

  “Then don’t ever let her get away.”

  * * *

  After dinner, Michael rapped lightly on Margaret’s door. He was surprised when she let him in and showed him to her sitting area. As soon as he sat, she spoke.

  “I apologize for my behavior tonight. It’s not my place to question your choice of bride.”

  “No, it’s not.” Margaret appeared sufficiently contrite, though he’d wager it had more to do with her behavior than her opinions. “On the other hand, I can’t imagine the overwhelming sense of powerlessness you’ve felt since Richard died. There was nothing you could do to save him, and ever since that time, you haven’t had much say in your or your daughters’ fates. Now I’m getting married, a decision that affects you, and again you don’t have any say in it. You’re allowed to lash out in the privacy of your home.”

  “Thank you for your understanding. I forget how like Richard you are.”

  “I appreciate the compliment. You don’t have anything to worry about. I know how it must seem to you given what you’ve heard of Jocelyn’s reputation, but she’s well respected and will be an asset to this family. I promise you, she will only have the best interests of every member of this family at heart.”

  “There are other women you could marry if your only concern was the family.”

  “Honestly, there’s not another woman in the country who is unmarried and wields the kind of power she does.”

  “Marrying someone out of duty, while admirable, is probably not the best course of action. Before Richard died, you were a confirmed bachelor. You haven’t so easily given that up to fulfill your sense of duty.”

  “No, I haven’t. You’re right. Everything I’ve said is just to explain my choice to others. The truth is that I’m taken by her. I was only a bachelor because I never thought I’d meet a woman like her. I know what you’re going to say, that she’s trapped me with her womanly wiles, but that’s not the case at all. If anything, she was as determined to remain unmarried as I was.” Michael chuckled. “It’s one of the things we have in common.”

  “Is she the girl you spoke of to me that night in Richard’s room?”

  “Yes.”

  Understanding dawned in her eyes. “You really love her then.”

  “More than I can say.”

  She nodded. “Then I shall love her too.”

  “Thank you, Margaret. I can’t wait for you to meet her.”

  “How long are you going to stay here?”

  “Not long at all. I have some business to attend to, but I intend to be on my way back to London in a couple of days.”

  “Are we to go with you?”

  “Not at this time. You, Mother, and the girls will follow as soon as I have lodgings arranged for you. You may want to start getting them accustomed to the idea of the trip.”

  “I will. I’m sure they’ll find it all very exciting.”

  “Good. Margaret, there are happier days on the horizon. For all of us.” It gave him great pleasure to be able to say that and truly believe it. Jocelyn would bring with her a new dawn for his family.

  * * *

  Chapter 31

  Jocelyn wondered if Lawrence had felt the uneasy tension throughout dinner. She had invited him to her house so she could tell him she was getting married, but the meal had come and gone, and she still hadn’t told him.

  “Thank you for a lovely meal,
my dear. I really must be getting to the brothel.” Lawrence stood.

  This was her last chance. If she didn’t speak now, she would have to suffer through another night of worrying. “Actually, if you have the time, there’s something I’d like to speak to you about.”

  “Oh?”

  “Yes.” This was it. All she needed to do was say the words. “I’m engaged to be married to the Earl of Dover.”

  “The Earl of Dover?” Lawrence didn’t appear the least surprised.

  “Yes. Michael Barwick.”

  “I’m familiar with him. Isn’t he away right now?”

  “He’s in Dover telling his family.”

  “So you’ve been engaged for some time now.” Lawrence slowly resumed his seat at the table.

  “A little while.”

  “He’s the one who gave you that ring, isn’t he?”

  Jocelyn glanced at her ring. Simply seeing it gave her an infusion of strength, reminding her of why she was doing this. “Yes, he is.”

  “Hmm.”

  Jocelyn didn’t blink as she watched him, waiting for some sign of his surprise, anger, betrayal, anything. Lawrence didn’t say a word or move at all other than his steady breathing and the blinking of his eyes. “Well?”

  “Well what, my dear?”

  “Aren’t you going to say something? Don’t you have any questions for me? Are you upset?”