Atlantis Series Complete Collection
Page 79
They arrived at the door a moment later. Shivawn didn’t pause or announce himself, just strode inside. He released her hand and marched to a side table, keeping his back to her as he poured a drink.
The first thing she noticed? The weapons were gone.
Why? Why had they been removed?
Her gaze flicked to Joachim. He sat on the bed, his legs over the side, his elbows resting on his knees. His gaze devoured her.
“Brenna,” he said, her name a sensual caress.
Instantly her blood heated another degree. Her nipples hardened further, and need pooled between her legs.
They must have come to the same conclusion she had: it was time to choose.
Last time she’d run from this, and from her feelings. Now she squared her shoulders. It was past time. Because, honestly, there would never be a right time. Not with fear at her back, holding a knife at her throat. There was only here and now.
The other women in the palace were well satisfied. They always grinned, never experienced a single fear. So badly she wanted to be one of them.
She would be one of them.
No, there would be no more running. But could she risk the safety she was sure to find with Shivawn for the passion she was sure to find with Joachim? There would be no going back once she’d voiced her preference. These men were too possessive, too determined to be “the one.”
Shivawn focused on her. “I’ve sensed your readiness,” he said, once again at her side. He gently gripped her shoulders and turned her to face him. “I know you want more.”
She licked her lips, nodded.
Satisfaction in his eyes. “I will never allow another man to hurt you. I will take care of you, pleasure you, make you so happy you’ll forget ever being sad.”
The perfect response. The words she’d always longed to hear—because he meant them. She knew he meant them.
He added, “The man on that bed will never be kind or gentle or any of the things I sense that you need.” He turned her again, this time making her face Joachim.
Their gazes locked, his heated, and her stomach quivered.
“Look at him,” Shivawn said. “Even now there’s a wildness about him that you cannot deny. He will never be able to control his temper. He will never be able to destroy the demons that plague you.”
Shivawn’s final words were supposed to comfort her, to assure her that choosing safety over passion was the right decision. But in that regard, they failed. Because there was no stronger warrior than Joachim. He did have a temper, and he did appear wild. Yet, if anyone could fight and destroy the demons of her past, he could. He was just so… vital.
Joachim didn’t utter a sound. He simply pulled four strips of cloth from underneath his pillow and draped them over his knees.
A tremor swept through her.
“What are those for?” Shivawn demanded.
“Tie me to the bed, Brenna,” Joachim said.
She glanced down at the material in puzzlement…and desire. “What?”
“Tie me to the bed. Know that I have never allowed another woman to do this to me, never will. For you, I make an exception. Because you are important to me.”
Her gaze swiftly returned to Joachim. His expression was hard, resolved and hot with arousal. So much arousal. Desire blazed in his blue eyes, burning her inside and out.
“Why?” she asked. “I don’t understand.”
“I’m not going to tell you that you’ll hate yourself later if you decide to be with Shivawn. You could probably be happy with him, and you would always feel safe. But he can’t fill the void inside you, and he can’t give you the life I know you’ve dreamed of having. I can. All you have to do is trust that I’ll never hurt you. Never. I would die first. These ties will allow me to prove it—you will have the power in our relationship.”
“Joachim,” Shivawn snarled.
But he wasn’t done. “Tie me to the bed, and you’ll be in control of everything that happens.” His jaw was clenched. “I’m giving you complete…control over me, allowing you to take back your own.”
Bondage. During sex. Her wild gaze darted between the two men. “Shi-Shivawn?” What did he have to say about this?
He remained stiff and silent, radiating fury.
“I noticed how you jolt every time someone comes up behind you,” Joachim said, “so I’m going to show you the pleasure of having a man there. Later. This time I want to show you the pleasure of being in control.”
This big, strong warrior was willing to give up control—his precious control—to be with her. A tremor worked through her. The revelation startled her, strengthened her. She’d wanted passion, she’d admitted that to herself already. No one could give her more passion than Joachim. She’d admitted that, too, but she’d been scared of it. Scared of him. And so she’d done her best to fall for Shivawn. She might even have convinced herself of it. For a little while. Eventually, she would have had to accept the truth.
All along, it had been Joachim she’d desired. She simply hadn’t wanted to want him. He was trusting her with his life. She could do no less for him.
I’m not going to be scared anymore.
Eyes filling with tears, she looked at Shivawn. He was so sweet, so kind and giving. But as she looked at him, she realized he was exactly what she didn’t need anymore. A bodyguard. She could take care of herself now. She’d been in this palace for over a week and hadn’t been hurt. She’d faced down the warriors, and she hadn’t been attacked or even disrespected.
“You can walk away from both of us,” Joachim said, his voice rough. “We won’t stop you.”
Run, and stay locked in her safe little world. No feeling. No pain. No pleasure. I’ll never run again.
“I’m so sorry, Shivawn,” she said, chin trembling. “I wanted it to be you. I did. But…”
“Stop. Please. Just stop.” He studied her for a long while, his jaw locked tight. Then he slowly turned to Joachim. “She is yours. I relinquish all claim to her.”
“Thank you,” Joachim said tightly.
Shivawn flicked her one last glance, nodded and strode from the room, leaving her alone with Joachim.
Before she would have run after her guard. Now she gulped and held her ground. Gathering her courage, she faced him.
Her man.
Fear would never rule her life again.
She’d chosen him, and she was only sorry it had taken her so long to realize the depth of his honor.
He’d made a play for the crown. When he lost, he could have vowed vengeance against Valerian. Instead, he accepted defeat and pledged his services to the king.
Underneath the rough exterior, he was a good man.
Ready to finally move on with her life, Brenna walked forward. With every step, she felt an invisible chain fall off her. Her heart raced erratically. She stopped in front of him.
Joachim stood, grasping the ties in his fists.
His gaze was hard, unrelenting. “Did your attacker use his hands or a weapon? If he used a weapon, I would like you to use the same on me.”
At first, she didn’t answer, didn’t want the memory to intrude on this precious time. “Only hands,” she finally managed on a trembling breath.
He nodded and gave her the bonds. Slowly, very slowly, he unfastened his pants and pushed them from his hips. They pooled on the floor, and she was given a glimpse of her very large, very aroused male.
“We go at your pace,” he said, lying on the bed. “When you’re ready, tie me.”
Her hands shook as she tied his wrists to the posts, then his ankles. Then she stood at the side of the bed, staring down at him. Utterly amazed by him.
Silent, Joachim watched her with mind-blowing intensity. Her knees almost buckled; she knew what he expected, what he wanted.
My turn to strip.
After the attack, she’d stopped working out, unwittingly trying to make herself as unattractive as possible to other men. If they didn’t come around, she didn’t have to wo
rry about them. And she had scars. Ugly scars. What if Joachim found her body undesirable?
Then he isn’t worthy of my time.
Easily said. Hard to accept.
She reached up with shaky fingers and undid her robe’s shoulder ties, revealing her breasts. She continued to gauge Joachim’s reaction. There was no disappointment in his eyes. Only desire. She lost a little of her uncertainty. Delicious bumps broke out over her skin as his gaze skimmed over her, his nostrils flaring with the force of his arousal.
“You are beautiful, Brenna. More so than I ever realized.”
With her robe completely loosed, the material fell from her body to join Joachim’s pants on the floor. Finally she was naked. Her cheeks heated as Joachim’s eyes raked over her once again. At one time, the thought of joining a man on a bed would have paralyzed her. This time, her hormones were too busy rejoicing.
“Close your eyes,” he said.
She didn’t think to argue.
“Imagine me behind you. Imagine my hands caressing your shoulders and cupping your breasts. Imagine me rolling your nipples between my fingers.”
Yes. Yes! She saw it in her mind, only this time the image was crystal clear. Her head fell onto his shoulder, her hair tickling them both. His fingers roved over every inch of her.
“Are you wet?” he rasped.
Unbearably so. She nodded.
“I want to lick you. May I?”
“Yes,” she said breathlessly.
“Then come to me. Please.”
She climbed onto the bed without hesitation and straddled him, her knees at his waist, his erection resting between her legs, touching her intimately but not entering her. The decadence! She moaned.
“Lean forward,” Joachim urged roughly.
He might be tied, but he was still a warrior. For the first time, a small kernel of fear sprouted. You’re safe. You’re protected.
“Please,” he added.
Slowly she crawled up him…until her breasts were poised over his waiting mouth. Her black curls fell over her line of vision as he eagerly sucked on her, dissolving her fear, filling her with pleasure. Contact with his hot, hot mouth was like nothing she’d ever experienced, volts of electricity lancing through her body.
She groaned, the sound broken and rough.
While Joachim sucked her, she continued to imagine. Had his hands been free, he would have traced them over her back, over the ridges of her spine. Over the curve of her bottom. Yes, yes! She saw it happening, somehow felt it. Everywhere his phantom hands touched, his mouth followed, his phantom tongue laving her skin. She writhed against him, so wet she slid back and forth with ease.
“You taste like heaven,” Joachim said.
In her mind, his big hands circled her and urged her to straighten, allowing his fingers to sink into her moist, hot center. Yes, oh, yes!
Why had she tied him? she mused.
He sucked her nipple with delicious force.
“Yes,” she gasped out, unable to say anything else. “Yes.”
“Do you want me to lick between your legs?”
“Yes.” She didn’t try to deny it or play coy. She wanted Joachim’s mouth there. She wanted it fiercely. Madly.
“Come here,” Joachim said. Sweat beaded his brow. His jaw was tense.
She crawled forward until she was poised over his face, the apex of her thighs mere inches from his beautiful lips.
“Lower,” he commanded, a rough snarl.
“Joachim,” she said, sinking into him and in the next instant he devoured her with tongue, lip and teeth.
She screamed at the intense sensation, the heady pleasure. Her hips ground against him.
“Come, Brenna. Come for me,” he said, and she obeyed.
Her pleasure exploded. Erupted. Her entire body shook and trembled with her climax, propelling her to new heights. Joachim drank her up until she thought she could take no more.
“Take me,” he said. “Put me inside you.”
Limbs weak, she straddled his waist without hesitation. As she rose up, she placed his shaft at her entrance.
Am I ready for this?
Her gaze met Joachim’s. His lids were half-closed His pupils completely overshadowed his irises. His lips were stretched taut over his teeth. Sweat glistened on his skin, and a pleasure flush darkened his cheeks.
This man…he was all in. Metaphorically speaking.
I’m ready.
“What about a condom?” she asked.
“Can’t get you pregnant.”
Now? Or ever?
Whatever! They’d work out the particulars later.
She sank down on him, accepting every inch he had to give.
All in, literally now, she thought, and wanted to burst out with a joyous laugh. He was big, and it had been so long. He stretched her, but it was a wonderful feeling. For the first time in years, she was alive.
“Joachim…”
He roared.
She rose up, panting his name. “Joachim.” She slid down. “My Joachim.”
She was safe. She was sated—and she would soon find release again. Her nerve endings were already sparking with renewed life.
“My Brenna. Faster. Go faster.”
She anchored her hands on his chest. Their faces were inches apart, his breath a part of hers and her breath a part of his.
“Kiss me,” he said. “Please.”
Her mouth meshed against his, and she gasped in pleasure; he swallowed the sound. Hard, hot, gentle, fast, slow, his tongue sparred with hers and she rode him, meeting his tempo. Total ravishment. Total bliss.
The kiss became savage, and in turn, the loving became savage. Her teeth banged his; her body slammed up and down. She purred and groaned and gasped some more.
“That’s it,” Joachim praised. “Take it all.”
“Yes.”
“No more fear.”
“No more,” she panted.
“Come for me, sweet.” He nipped her collarbone. He strained against his bonds. “Show me how much you like having me inside you.”
At that point, she could no longer hold back, could not prolong the pleasure. She erupted for the second time, the new orgasm so intense a black web clouded her vision. She was dying slowly, quickly, unable to breathe, yet so alive she could have stayed exactly where she was forever.
“Joachim,” she screamed, and for once she didn’t care how broken her voice sounded.
“Brenna.” He roared loud and long and reared up, sinking deep, deeper than she’d ever thought possible.
When he stopped shuddering against her, he collapsed on the mattress and she collapsed onto his chest.
“Thank you,” she panted. “Thank you.”
“Untie me,” he ordered harshly.
She didn’t think to deny him—though she would bet he could have busted free very easily. Blindly she reached up and removed the bonds. His arms instantly wrapped around her, pulling her close and holding her tightly, cherishing her.
“No more fear with me,” he said again.
“No more,” she agreed. She would have agreed with anything he said just then. Marry him—yes. Be his slave—well, maybe. His heat surrounded her, enveloped her, beckoned her.
“Mine,” he said.
“Yours,” she breathed. “Joachim’s.” Her eyes closed, her lids growing heavier and heavier with every second that passed. Sleep summoned, a peaceful sleep she’d needed for so long but had been too afraid to take. “Don’t let me go.”
“Never.”
As oblivion claimed her, she was smiling.
* * *
SHIVAWN STOOD IN the hallway for a long while. He wished Brenna had chosen him, but it had been Joachim her eyes had heated for. Joachim she’d probably wanted all along. He was angry, so very angry. She was beautiful, passionate and kind. But she wasn’t his. He knew that now. No matter how much pleasure Shivawn could have given her, no matter how safe he could have made her feel, she would always have wanted Joachim.r />
The two were meant to be together. They were mates.
How could he have missed the signs?
Now he was alone.
Perhaps one day he would find a woman who wanted him above all others.
He blinked when he realized vampire Alyssa had glided into the hallway and now stood a few feet away from him.
He scowled. She frowned.
“You smell like a human,” she said, her tone flat. “Have you been with one? Is she your one and only?”
Always she asked him a thousand questions. What was he doing? What did he like to eat? What made him happy? Sad? Would he like to kiss her?
He told her what he’d always told her. “What business is it of yours?” He leaped into a quick stride in an effort to escape her.
She followed, keeping pace beside him. “Is she?”
“No,” he snapped.
“See! I told you she wasn’t. I told you! Because I am. I and I alone can attend to your needs,” she snapped back. “You should have come to me.”
“And I told you how wrong you are.”
His mate would not be vampire. He’d never shared Valerian’s love for the race, and he never would.
Alyssa was beautiful, and as usual Shivawn even felt himself stir for a taste of her, but he would never touch her.
Vampires survived on blood, and they sometimes took more than a donor wished to offer. Or often took without asking permission. He’d made the mistake of bedding a vampire only once and had almost died for it. Never again, he’d vowed. Alyssa knew that, but she always sought him out whenever she came to visit.
“Goodbye, Alyssa,” he said, and strode away from her.
She wasn’t content to remain behind. She never was.
She rushed after him, even jumped in front of him, her eyes aglow. Determination radiated from her. “I’ve always known I would have you one day, Shivawn, and I’ve decided today is that day.”
She threw herself at him, her lips slamming into his, her tongue forcing its way into his mouth. The taste of her filled him in an instant. Not a taste of blood and death, but of woman. Sweet, needy woman.
His body responded.
He might hate himself in the morning, but she could help him forget his loneliness.
“One night,” he growled. “That’s all I’ll give you.”