TAKING HIS SEED

by Zoey Parker

  The work felt good, though. Honest. He hadn’t expected that, but he got his first check—after freaking out over how much money the government took out—he’d held it and felt proud. Even if they’d taken a huge chunk, he’d paid taxes and the money was clean. He’d earned it fair and square. It felt better than he thought it would.

  And he did like the work a lot. He got to talk motors and bike styles all day, help guys find their new ride. On occasion, he’d come across someone who was Rebels material and he’d recruit them. On the sly, of course. Matt didn’t want him doing that sort of stuff in the shop. When he wasn’t selling, he was fixing and working on bikes, which had always been something he was both good at and enjoyed. It brought him peace to take something broken and make it run again.

  When he came home at the end of the day, Becca and Emma were there, waiting for him. Usually, Becca already had dinner ready. Some amazing concoction of chicken and vegetables or cheesy pasta. It was always delicious and he’d never eaten so well. Though, Mama didn’t have to know he felt that way. Wasn’t that the dream, though? Find a woman who can cook even better than Mama can? Well, he had.

  And if dinner weren’t enough, she got up with him every morning, made the coffee while he was in the shower, then got Emma up and got her dressed before making them all breakfast. And, no, there were still no frozen waffles in their freezer. It was all eggs and bacon or waffles and pancakes from scratch. Then, she’d have his lunch waiting for him to take to work. Sometimes it was leftovers, sometimes a sandwich. But even the basic turkey on rye she managed to make taste incredible. He felt like he lived with a personal chef. And he felt spoiled to no end. She took such good care of him.

  Becca had wanted to keep working at the gift shop. She had for a few weeks. But then, one week she said she felt tired and sick, and after several days of that, he’d tried to make her see a doctor. But she had sat up suddenly in bed one night.

  “Oh, my God, I’m an idiot.”

  “What?” He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and turned on his side to look up at her.

  “I can’t believe I didn’t realize it.”

  “Can you give me a hint, babe? I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  “I’ve been extra tired at night, eating more food than ever, and feeling sick in the mornings.” She shook her head. “I’m probably pregnant.”

  That had woken him up. He sat up in bed in a rush and turned to face her. “Are you serious?”

  “It makes sense. And it’s not like we ever bothered to use protection or stop it in any way.”

  His heart raced and the excitement filled his chest. “How can we know for sure?”

  “Take a pregnancy test.”

  “Okay.” He nodded. “Like the ones from a convenient store or something?”

  “Sure. They work just fine.”

  He was out of bed in a flash. It was growing late, but most of those places were open all night.

  “What are you doing?” she asked.

  “Going to get a test.”

  “Right now?”

  “Right now.” He pulled up his jeans and zipped them. “I want to know, don’t you?”

  “Yes, but—”

  He came to the bed and kissed her before pulling on his boots. “I hope you are. I really do.”

  She smiled at him as he stuck his wallet and keys in his pocket. “Could you maybe get some ice cream while you’re there?”

  He turned back to her with a crooked smile. “The cravings start already?”

  She shrugged one shoulder. “Chocolate.”

  He’d hopped on his bike and rushed to the nearest store. With a pint of ice cream and a pregnancy test in hand, he checked out and rushed back home to her apartment. It had only been six weeks since the fire and they were still looking for the perfect house. There were a few they had their eye on, but they hadn’t decided yet, and that was before the insurance check showed up and bumped them into a higher price range.

  He’d hopped up the stairs two at a time, and barely stopped to lock the door and put the ice cream in the freezer before taking the test in to her. They’d gone into the bathroom, she peed on the little stick, then they stood in the kitchen, eating ice cream from the carton while they waited. Rowan kept looking at the time on the microwave. When it hit five minutes, he hurried into the bathroom.

  She didn’t have to ask what it said. From where she stood, spoon still in hand, she heard him hooting.

  “Yes!” He came back to the kitchen with the test and showed it to her. “We’re going to have a baby!”

  He’d grabbed her into a tight hug and kissed her.

  “You’re really happy about this?” she asked, looking at him somewhat hesitantly.

  “Absolutely. Aren’t you? You don’t seem too excited.”

  “I am, it’s just…” She put the ice cream carton back in the freezer and set the spoon in the sink. “Let’s get back to bed.”

  They went back in the bedroom, turned off the light after he’d gotten undressed again, and slipped into their bed.

  “What is it?” he asked her after pulling her close.

  “I’m sorry. It’s nothing. I’m very happy.”

  “Well, I think it’s clear ] you’re not going to win any awards for your acting skills. You seem very much not happy about this.”

  She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. “I guess part of me is still waiting for things to fall apart. Nick had been perfect until after we got back from the honeymoon. Then, all of a sudden, he was freaking out that we weren’t unpacked and that wedding stuff was all over the place. He started to get really mean and yelled at me all the time. But it wasn’t until I told him I was pregnant that he started hitting me. I don’t know why that did it. But I remember being so excited. He came home from work and I ran to show him the test. He’d taken one look at it, handed it back to me, and asked me where dinner was. When I said it wasn’t ready yet, he slapped me across the face.”

  Rowan reached up and stroked her cheek with his fingertips, then kissed her jaw.

  “I know you’re nothing like that,” she said, “and you would never do that, but the fear is still there. Maybe that’s why it took me so long to admit I was pregnant. I think I’ve known for a few days, but didn’t want to admit it to myself. I was too scared.”

  Rowan pulled her tighter. “It’s okay. I understand, but you have nothing to fear. I’d never raise a hand to you like that and I am truly happy to be having a baby with you. My family will be thrilled. They were already excited to get Emma, but now a new baby? They’ll go nuts.”

  She giggled and wiped her tears. “Thank you. I know you wouldn’t hurt me. I’m sorry. It’s stupid.”

  “No, it’s not. You went through some really difficult times and it left a mark. We all have our scars.” He’d thought of Marcus in that moment, and a pang of pain followed by a pang of regret shot through his chest. He missed him and every time the Rebels got together, it was a reminder of all he’d done wrong or had failed to do.

  But then Becca had snuggled in close and he had let his mind drift to their future. To a new baby and all that they would have together. She would be his forever now. No matter what happened, they’d always be tied together through this little miracle.

  “How should we tell Emma?” she asked, yawning.

  “We’ll need something good.”

  “We can get her one of those big sister shirts.”

  “Maybe a little baby doll to take care of,” he added. “She’ll be excited, right?”

  “Are you kidding me? She’s been begging for a sister or brother for years. She just won’t want to wait.”

  “Well, neither do I.”

  They laughed together.

  “Let’s go tomorrow,” he said. “You have off anyway. We can go shopping, get something for Emma, get something for the baby. It’ll be fun.”

  “Sounds good.” But her words were soft and heavy. She was exhausted.

  He brushed he
r hair and kissed her forehead. “Sleep, my princess.”

  The next day they had found a big sister shirt and a little onesie that was gray and yellow stripped, for either a boy or a girl. They’d also found a doll that looked very much like a real baby.

  They’d wrapped it all up and given it to Emma. First the doll, then the onesie. Of course, she’d thought the onesie was for the doll, but soon discovered it was far too big.

  “Well, it’s not for that baby,” Becca had said with a smile huge on her face. “You have to open this one next.”

  Emma tore out the tissue paper and pulled out the shirt. She studied the words for a while. “What does it say?”

  “It says, ‘Big Sister,’” Becca said.

  Emma looked up at them, pulled her eyebrows together and held the shirt over the doll. “This one is too big, too.”

  “That’s because it’s not for your doll,” Rowan said. He took the shirt from her and held it up to her, showing that it was just the right size. “It’s for you.”

  “But, I’m not a sister.”

  “No, but you will be,” Becca said.

  Emma’s eyes had grown huge. “You mean you’re having a baby?”

  Becca nodded and smiled.

  “Where is it?” she asked.

  “Right here.” Becca patted her stomach. “Just like you were once. It takes a long time for the baby to grow big enough to come out and be born.”

  Emma nodded in awe. “Like a whole week?”

  “A little longer than that. Nine months,” Becca said.

  Emma looked confused by this.

  “Think of it this way,” Rowan said. “You know when Christmas is, right?”

  She nodded. “Long time away.”

  “Well, right after Christmas, the baby will come.”

  Emma’s face fell. “Can’t the baby come sooner?”

  “Sorry, honey. That’s just how long it takes.” Becca pulled her into a hug. “But that will give us time to get a new house and make a room for the baby and for you to get ready to be the best big sister ever.”

  “I’m ready now,” she said with confidence. “If you tell the baby I’m ready, will it come sooner?”

  “Maybe we can make some sort of countdown,” Rowan said. “That way we can see how much longer.”

  “Okay.” Emma picked up her doll and rocked it like a baby. Then she ran off to her room and shouted, “Best big sister ever!”

  They’d found their perfect house a month later, after getting the insurance check. They’d packed up Becca’s small apartment and Rowan’s new things, and moved into the big, empty house. They’d worked quickly to fill it with furniture and to decorate. Rowan loved seeing what Becca did with each space. He’d never lived in a house so beautiful or felt so happy in all his life. And soon after they moved in, they hired a housekeeper and he’d convinced her it was okay to quit her job and focus on the baby and Emma.

  The new house had a nice, big basement. This would become the new Jagged Rebels headquarters. They’d been meeting in Nate’s basement, but it wasn’t quite big enough and it was full of Christmas decorations and storage items. Now they had a permanent place.

  The basement was filled with comfortable couches and chairs, a big TV so they could just hang out, and most importantly, a large portrait of Marcus on one wall. After the funeral, they’d all taken time to grieve. They’d come together to have a memorial ride and went to all of his favorite places, scattering his ashes. Kara rode along on Jameson’s bike and helped. At the end, they’d taken turns talking about him and sharing their favorite memories over a bonfire.

  But it still felt empty when they all got together. Like there was clearly something missing. And he’d never tell anyone except Becca, but sometimes, he avoided looking at the picture because it made it so much more real that he wasn’t there in person. But, they’d started to heal, slowly. They’d helped Kara go through his things and take care of all the little pieces that make up an ended life. Rowan had one of his t-shirts, one that had “Badass” across the front. He’d never wear the shirt, but when he looked in the back of his closet, it was there. A little piece of Marcus close by.

  When Rowan looked at his life now, things looked so close to perfect. There was only one little tiny piece of the puzzle missing. And he was going to fix that today. He should have done it months ago, but everything hadn’t been in place until now.

  “Are we all ready?” Rowan asked, watching as Becca helped Emma into her jacket.

  Emma nodded and clapped her hands together. “This will be so fun!”

  Becca nodded. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been for a ride.”

  Rowan handed over her helmet, the one he’d bought especially for her with his new discount at the bike shop. She hadn’t used it much, but a few times they’d gone for an early morning ride.

  Rowan fastened Emma’s helmet on, also a new purchase. He helped her into the sidecar, which he’d borrowed from Matt for this special occasion. Emma had never ridden on the bike before in any way.

  Becca popped on her helmet and climbed onto the back of the bike after Rowan did. She wrapped her arms around him, and he looked over at Emma.

  “Ready?” he asked her.

  She nodded, the helmet flopping forward and back.

  He started up the bike and they drove off. It was early evening. The sun was setting and the sky was pink and orange over the horizon. He took them on the most scenic roads he knew of. Then, he headed onto the highway.

  He slowed down and pulled the bike over on the shoulder of the road, in a seemingly random place. He got off the bike, helped Becca down, and got Emma out.

  “What are we doing?” Becca asked.

  She looked around at the trees, the gravel shoulder, the highway. Her face changed and she seemed to realize where they were.

  “I know it’s not the most romantic location, but this is where we first met,” Rowan said.

  He took the items he’d brought from his saddlebag. A thick blanket, some sandwiches and chips and sparkling grape juice. He spread out the blanket and Emma immediately sat and looked up at him expectantly.

  “Want to help me set the food out?” he asked her.

  She pulled the remaining items out carelessly and set them on the blanket. Somehow, the mini bag of chips never made it to the blanket, but was opened and half devoured by the time Rowan helped Becca sat down.

  She rubbed her growing belly and picked up a sandwich. “So, this is what you were doing in the kitchen all morning.”

  “Yup. I hope they’re okay.”

  She took a bite of the turkey sandwich, and he took a bite of his own. He’d tried to make it like she did, but something was missing, and he hadn’t been able to figure out what. It still tasted okay, though.

  “What’s different?” he asked. “What do you do that I don’t?”

  She thought for a moment. “Probably the mustard. I mix Dijon and spicy.”

  And he’d only used spicy. Maybe that was it.

  “It’s very good, though,” she said.

  After they’d eaten, he took out the bottle of sparkling grape juice. “I have a special toast to make.”

  He ripped off the foil and poured the juice into three glasses. He handed one to Emma, and one to Becca. Emma held up the glass, acting like she was a princess with her pinky sticking out.

  “I have been living the perfect life,” Rowan said. “A new job I enjoy, a beautiful new house, a gorgeous woman by my side, an adorable little daughter”—he gestured to Emma—“and another little princess on the way. But something still feels like it’s missing.”

  Becca pulled her eyebrows together and tilted her head slightly at him.

  “It was this.” Rowan set down his glass and reached into his pocket. He held one ring out to Becca and another, smaller ring out to Emma. “I love you both. I want to continue to build our happy family together. Becca, will you marry me? Emma, will you let me join your family?”

  Emma l
ooked at her mother with an amazed smile. “I get a ring, too!” She reached over and tried to grab it from Rowan, but he took her hand and slid it into place, then kissed her hand. She giggled and moved her hand back and forth to make the small pink stone glitter in the sun.

  Then, he turned to Becca and picked up her hand. “I love you so much. Since the first moment you showed up, you were like an angel to me. Come to save me from death, then from a life of loneliness. I want to keep saving each other for the rest of our lives.”