Finding Joy (Love's Compass Book 5)

by Melanie D. Snitker

  Now Chelsea sat in her car in the hospital parking lot, desperately trying to shake off her anger. Her emotions had oscillated all day, and she was exhausted. She took in a deep breath and tried to release her tension with the air in her lungs. Confident she could put aside her work issues for now, she got out of her car. The early evening wind was chilly as Chelsea walked purposefully across the hospital parking lot.

  Warm air enveloped her as she entered the hospital. She consciously left the whole situation with Parker behind. She was here to visit her sister, and she wasn’t about to let him mess that up, too.

  Chelsea thought about the handful of texts she’d received as updates. They hadn’t been much. It’d been torture having to work when she would’ve preferred to stay here at the hospital. She felt the weight of the bag of food she carried in one hand. She’d told Tuck she was bringing dinner. Right now, it was about all she could do.

  Upstairs, Chelsea entered the waiting area to find Tuck’s sister, Serenity, her son, Gideon, and Patty. “Hey, guys. How’re they doing?”

  Patty put some things in her purse. “They’re doing well. Laurie’s still tired, but she looks better tonight. We took Gideon to go see his new cousin in the NICU.”

  “That’s great! What’d he think?” They were able to go up to the NICU and observe through the glass windows as often as they wanted. Chelsea prayed it wouldn’t be too long before the sweet baby boy could be held by all the family that loved him.

  Serenity laughed. “He’d been looking forward to it. But since you can’t see much of the tiny guy, it was a little anti-climactic for him. It’ll be different when he can reach out and hold the baby’s hand.”

  “No doubt.” Chelsea moved the bag of food from one hand to another. “I brought some contraband. There should be more than enough if you guys want something to eat, too.”

  Patty held up a hand. “Thanks, honey. But we’re on our way out. You’ve got good timing. Laurie was just commenting about how she’s finally hungry again.”

  Serenity nodded. “Gideon’s done well, but we’re about at his limit. We’re going to stay the night with Mom and Grams and then head back home tomorrow. We’ll be back this weekend. Aaron said he’d come with us.”

  “That’ll be great.” Aaron and Serenity had been dating for several months now and everyone in the family liked him. He was good for Serenity and did amazing with Gideon. It was no secret Patty hoped he’d ask Serenity to marry him soon. Chelsea had only met him twice, but he seemed like a nice guy.

  “You go ahead and take that food in there before your arm goes numb.” Patty hugged Chelsea and then Serenity did as well. “We’ll see you tomorrow, I’m sure.”

  “Bye, Patty. Serenity, you and Gideon be careful driving back.”

  “We will. Thanks!” They waved and entered the elevator.

  Chelsea maneuvered through the maze of hallways to arrive at Laurie’s hospital room. She knocked lightly.

  “Come on in.”

  Laurie’s voice sounded strained. The beeping monitors welcomed Chelsea as she held up the bag. “I come bearing gifts.”

  Tuck practically launched himself out of the chair he was sitting in and strode toward her, relieving her of the food. “God bless you. This hospital food doesn’t cut it.”

  Laurie laughed and then grimaced, cradling her stomach. “He’s been complaining about the food here all day long. It’s not that bad.”

  Tuck pointed at the large “Daisy Belle’s Diner” printed on the outside of the bag. “Compared to Daisy’s food?”

  “Point taken.” Laurie shifted slightly and flinched. Tuck helped her rearrange the IV and blood pressure cords. “Did you tell Daisy we were here?”

  Chelsea wrinkled her nose. “I wasn’t sure if I should tell people or not. I didn’t want to steal your thunder. But she was so busy I didn’t have the opportunity.”

  Tuck took the lid off a container of vegetable beef soup, retrieved a spoon, and set it on the tray in front of Laurie. “If Daisy knew, she’d have insisted on delivering this food herself.”

  They all had a good laugh but Chelsea had no doubt he was right. It was Daisy who’d helped Laurie when someone broke into her photography studio and shoved her to the ground. Laurie had a sprained ankle, and Daisy took her to the diner down the street, made her comfortable, and called the police. That was the night Laurie and Tuck met. Daisy liked to take some responsibility for their introduction and treated Laurie like a daughter.

  Laurie took a sip of the soup and nodded appreciatively. “Oh yeah. There’s no comparing hospital food with this.”

  Tuck opened a smaller bag with homemade rolls and polished one off in three bites. “Thanks, Chelsea. We appreciate this. It looks like there’s plenty. Have you eaten yet?”

  Laurie pointed at another empty chair. “Sit, girl. Tell us about your day and have some food.”

  Chelsea wasn’t about to tell them how upset Parker was when she showed up to work late. It’d make Laurie feel horrible and there was no need for that. She shrugged and busied herself with a roast beef sandwich. “How’s your little guy?”

  Laurie seemed happy, though there was no missing the exhaustion on her face or the concern in her eyes. “He’s better. He’s doing well on C-PAP but they haven’t had any luck switching him off that. They’re waiting to see how his oxygen levels are doing and may try again tomorrow. I’ve been pumping all day so hopefully I’ll be able to feed him when he’s to that point.” The corners of her mouth fell.

  Laurie hadn’t been shy about how much she’d hoped to have her son with no medication and wanted desperately to breastfeed him. Chelsea could only imagine how she was feeling now.

  “We’re all praying for him. You’ll be holding him and feeding him in no time.”

  Tuck nodded his agreement. He exchanged a glance with Laurie who tipped her chin. “We named him. We’ve been telling people as they come by, but will call and let everyone else know tonight.”

  Chelsea clapped, almost dropping her sandwich. If that bad boy landed on the hospital floor, there’d be no hope of recovery. “Yay! What is it?”

  “Nicholas Liam Chandler.” As Tuck uttered the words, his voice became husky.

  Chelsea caught Laurie wiping a tear from the corner of her eye. “That’s a beautiful name. Liam. That was your father’s name, wasn’t it?”

  Tuck nodded and cleared his throat. “And Nicholas was my grandfather’s.”

  “It’s perfect. I’m sure both men would be proud. I’ll bet Patty and Grams are over the moon.”

  Laurie chuckled and winced. “They both cried so hard, I didn’t think they would ever let go of Tuck’s neck.”

  Chelsea thought of her baby nephew — of Nicholas — and couldn’t wait until she got to hold him.

  A half hour later, Chelsea knew she should probably get going and let her sister rest. A nurse had come by with some pain medication, and it didn’t look like it’d take long for Laurie to fall asleep. Chelsea sure didn’t want to leave them, though. But she gave both Laurie and Tuck hugs, promising to come by the next day with some of Laurie’s favorite iced tea.

  The elevator opened up on the bottom floor of the hospital when something snagged Chelsea’s attention. She turned and caught sight of Parker’s dog as he disappeared into an elevator across the hallway from her. Parker? What was he doing here? The elevator went up to the second floor and stopped. Curiosity got the best of her and she got back into the elevator she’d just exited and pushed the button for floor number two. The door slid open and she stepped onto the pediatric wing.

  What are you doing, Chels? You should go on home.

  But a need to satisfy her curiosity drove her into the waiting area and then down the hall.

  The image of Parker sitting on the floor with five children, smiling and laughing while they played with Happy, stopped her cold. The kids were excited and Parker… Wow, when he really smiled, it completely transformed his face. He looked like a different man and years you
nger. Seriously handsome. No wonder he’d gotten big-name endorsements before his accident with his roping skills, those muscles befitting a rancher, and that knock down grin…

  His gaze shifted from one of the kids to Chelsea. She caught her breath as his frown returned. Disbelief followed by anger and finally curiosity took turns as they marched across his face. He stood quickly, spoke to the nurse nearby, and headed her way.

  Chapter Eight

  What was Chelsea doing here? Parker regretted how upset he’d made her this morning and then proceeded to beat himself up over it through the course of the day. Coming here to the hospital was finally the respite he needed from a horrendous Monday. Seeing her here was the last thing he’d expected. He told Nurse Kay he’d be back in a moment, and she assured him Happy would be looked after.

  As Parker approached Chelsea, he had no idea what she was thinking. She’d averted her eyes, concentrating on a nurse walking by and then watching Happy and the children behind him. After what seemed like forever, she lifted her eyes to his.

  “The kids are having a blast with Happy.”

  He nodded. “Nurse Kay says they look forward to our visit all week.”

  “You come here every Monday?” Chelsea sounded surprised.

  And why shouldn’t she be? Especially after today. He imagined most people would warn children to stay away from someone like him. He didn’t know whether he could adequately explain how coming here was mutually beneficial for both him and the kids he saw. He wasn’t entirely sure of it himself.

  “What are you doing here?” His voice came out somewhat accusing, even though that hadn’t been his intention.

  Her eyes widened slightly before her frown deepened and she clasped her hands in front of her. “I’m visiting my sister. She and her husband had their baby boy early this morning. He was born seven weeks early and is in the NICU.”

  Chelsea’s words delivered a powerful kick to Parker’s conscience. After all that, she’d still come to work. And he’d berated her over being late. Wow, talk about a first-class jerk.

  What’s more, she could’ve followed him out of the barn and yelled at him. Accused him for being the horrible person he was. She might have chosen to call his mom and tell her how poorly Parker had acted. Chelsea could’ve walked out on the job completely.

  But she hadn’t. She’d stuck with it. Why? To show him she couldn’t be pushed around? Or did she need the job as badly as she’d said she did? He still didn’t understand why she was working at the ranch in the first place. Yet she’d made it through the mud and then the isolation. Her determination was admirable.

  He cleared his throat. “How’s the baby doing?”

  “Nicholas is strong. Holding his own.” Chelsea’s voice was tinged with pride. “He’ll be okay. But it sounds like he’s going to be here for a while. It’s hard on my sister and brother-in-law.”

  Parker could only imagine. “I hope he gets strong soon so he can go home.”

  Chelsea nodded once. She looked like she might leave but then her gaze focused on the kids behind Parker. “Why do you visit here?”

  Parker briefly considered avoiding the question entirely. After what he’d said this morning, he at least owed her some honesty.

  The sounds of the kids laughing floated down the hall. “It makes them happy. I’m a sucker for a kid’s smile.” He realized he was smiling himself when he looked at her again. He hadn’t been completely honest with her. “I find some solace here, too, I suppose.” He shrugged, not willing to delve into the subject any further.

  Chelsea took in his face and her features softened. “Let me guess. This was where you were going when I spilled tea on Happy.”

  Parker surprised himself by chuckling. “Yes, it was. But don’t worry, if his paws were sticky, the kids didn’t notice.”

  “I’m glad.”

  Her eyes sparkled when she beamed back at him. The green reminded him of the fields at the ranch during the spring. Rich. Lively. Full of understanding. He suddenly wanted to fall into those eyes and find out more about the beautiful woman standing in front of him.

  There were more reasons than he could count for why he should take that thought and toss it right out the window. There’s no way she’d give him a chance after he was so nasty this morning.

  What did she think when she saw his face? Repulsion? Pity? Even if she was one of the few who didn’t immediately judge him by the blemishes, she as much as told him that his attitude put her off. Probably put a lot of people off. He didn’t deserve her consideration anyway. God knew she could do much better than him.

  And if his relationship with Brenda taught him one thing, it was that he couldn’t fully trust anyone. He’d thought she was the one for him. He’d even considered proposing to her. Until she dumped him the moment his status as a rodeo star crumbled around him. Knowing what he did now, it was best that she’d walked away. But she’d taken his confidence in women right along with her.

  Who’s to say Chelsea wasn’t just like Brenda, working at the ranch so she could get close to the family money? The moment the thought went through his mind, he knew that wasn’t the case. Chelsea had been at the hospital until early this morning, was berated at work, and yet was still here helping her sister at the end of the day. That spoke of commitment and integrity. He doubted Brenda had ever possessed much of either.

  Parker felt himself drawn to Chelsea in a powerful way, as if she held the lone candle in a room of darkness. The idea scared him to no end. He coughed and broke their eye contact. “I’d better get back. Happy can get pretty riled up if I’m not there to keep his paws on the ground.”

  “I’ll bet.” Amusement lifted a corner of her mouth. “Have a good evening.”

  “You, too.”

  She walked away from him and got into the elevator. As the doors closed, his heart squeezed. A part of him wanted to follow her. To say something else to express how sorry he was for his words that morning. But he knew that no matter what he said, he’d make a mess of it. It was better to let it go. Better for both of them.

  “Is everything okay?”

  Nurse Kay’s voice brought Parker’s attention back to the kids.

  “Sorry about that. Yes, I’m fine.” He titled his head toward the giggles and barks. “I’d better get him calmed down before he begins racing down the hall again.”

  They both laughed at the memory from several weeks ago. But Parker’s mind continued to focus on Chelsea and the way vulnerability and strength mixed together to create a mystery he felt inexplicably drawn to solve.

  ~

  Chelsea still couldn’t wrap her mind around the image of Parker at the children’s ward last night. Seriously, if someone had asked her to guess what he did in his spare time, making sick children happy wouldn’t have even made a ripple in the pond.

  She thought she had Parker figured out. Had him categorized in her head. Now she didn’t know where to put him.

  When she got to the ranch the next morning, there was no sign of Parker. Chelsea walked up the stairs to her office, surprised to find the light had been turned on. She put her stuff down and turned to the desk, stopping in her tracks.

  Sitting there was a piece of paper and a bottle of the blueberry tea she liked.

  Chelsea blinked twice before walking forward to lift the paper off the smooth surface of the desk. The note was short and written in Parker’s flowing print.

  Chelsea,

  Please forgive my rudeness yesterday morning. I should have given you the opportunity to explain. If you need time off to help your sister and her family, don’t hesitate to ask. I hope your nephew continues to improve daily.

  Regards,

  Parker

  Chelsea read it three times before placing it on the desk again. She grasped the tea, surprised to find it was ice cold. Parker had to have left it minutes before she arrived.

  And he’d remembered what kind of tea she liked from that morning at the gas station. That meant as much as anythi
ng else.

  She twisted the top off the bottle and took a drink. The realization that he’d paid so much attention brought a smile to her lips.

  “Okay, Mr. Wilson. I’ll accept your offer of a truce.”

  Chelsea sipped on her tea most of the morning as she worked. She didn’t hear a peep from Parker or anyone else. By lunch time, she couldn’t wait to get outside for a few minutes. She heated up some leftover pizza in the microwave then headed down from the barn until she came to what had become her favorite tree. It overlooked the pasture which, at this moment, was moving slightly in the breeze and reminded her of waves on the ocean. She tried to imagine what it would all look like once spring had really started to set in. Green grass, the tree filled with leaves. It’d be gorgeous.

  The new longhorns were gone now. They must have been relocated to the rest of the herd. None of them were visible from her location, and Chelsea missed watching them.

  She settled onto the ground at the base of the tree and leaned her back against the trunk. It was a warm day compared to the last week, and she was grateful to soak in some sunshine. It didn’t take long to polish off her pizza. She was so relaxed that when something scampered out of the brush, she jumped, scraping her back on the bark. “Ouch!”

  A small, black kitten leapt into the air and bounced away from Chelsea, apparently as shocked as she was.

  Chelsea placed a hand on her lower back, rubbing at the spot she’d hurt. Now that she knew it was just a kitten, she willed her heart to calm down. She held her other hand out toward the tiny animal and clicked her tongue.

  The kitten watched her for a moment, the hair on the back of its neck smoothing into place. It tentatively approached her. And then, as if the air of caution were a façade, trotted right up to sniff Chelsea’s fingers.

  The whiskers tickled and Chelsea fought to keep her hand still. Within moments, the kitten was rubbing its face against her hand while she scratched its ears. It wasn’t until the kitten had rolled onto its back that Chelsea saw it was a girl.