“What are you doing here? You should be at work.” Her voice was weak and that didn’t settle with him.
He needed to call work.
“I got you some stuff. I’ll be right back.” He grabbed the small trash can she kept by the bedside and set it next to her.
He called the school and convinced them he was sick, but the principal wasn’t happy and made it perfectly clear.
He carried the bags to her room and found her sleeping. That had to be a positive, he thought. At least she was getting some rest and had stopped heaving.
The best thing for him to do was to make himself at home and do what he could for her while she slept. He brewed a pot of coffee, did the breakfast dishes, and mopped up the bathroom. If she was going to be spending time on the floor, it’d better be clean.
He’d finished his conference notes by the time he heard her stirring in her room, and he went to her.
He carried in a tray with the soup he’d found in the fridge, some tea, and a few ginger pills. He set it on her nightstand and turned on the small lamp. “Are you feeling any better?”
“My stomach is sore.”
“I’ll bet.” He closed the blind so that the light was soft. “Is that okay?”
“Yes. Thanks.”
“Let’s get you situated.” He gathered her into his arms, and she clung to him. For a moment he held on to the feeling of her near him. He knew it was for strength, but a part of him felt a deeper connection.
He arranged pillows until she could sit up against them.
He handed her the pills and a glass of water. “Here, it’s ginger. Curtis says to take them and they’ll help with the nausea.”
She nodded and took the pills.
Carlos kicked off his shoes, picked up the bowl he’d carried in, and walked around the other side of the bed. Careful not to spill the contents of the bowl, he scooted across the mattress until he sat next to her. “Let’s get something in your belly.”
“Carlos, I can’t eat,” she said weakly.
“You need to try. You’re not going to fight off anything if you don’t keep up your strength.”
He lifted the spoon to her lips, and she slurped then laid her head back on the pillow.
“Try some more.” He lifted the spoon to her lips again and she took another sip. “Okay, now we’re making progress.”
This time when she laid her head back, it rested on his shoulder. Instinctively he kissed her forehead.
“So he told you I was sick? I asked him not to.”
“Ed? No, he kept your secret.”
Madeline turned her eyes up at him. “How did you know?”
“Christian called me from the school office because he was so worried about you.” Gently he tilted her face with his fingers and looked down into her eyes. “You’re not doing yourself any favors by having Ed lie to me about your condition.”
“I didn’t tell him to lie. I just told him to tell you I was okay. Which I am, by the way.”
“No, you’re not. When is your next doctor appointment?”
“Tomorrow.”
“I’m taking you.”
Madeline tried to sit up and turn away from him, but Carlos guided her back to his shoulder. Then he lifted the spoon of soup back to her lips and she took another sip.
“You need to be at work. You worked too damn hard to get that job. You’d better keep it,” she argued.
“For your sake I will. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have the education to even have the job. But for once in your life, admit you need some help.”
She sat silently for a moment. “This was never supposed to happen.” He heard the quiver in her voice and then felt her body shake as the tears rolled down her cheeks. “I’ve never been sick a day in my life.”
“I know, honey.” He set the bowl of soup on the other nightstand and gathered her in his arms and held her against his chest.
“Look at me. I’m a mess. My skin is pasty, my boobs are missing, and now my hair is falling out in clumps.” She threw a hand in the air. “My husband left me and is marrying someone else…”
“Wait.” He adjusted to see her better. “Matt is getting married?”
She nodded. “And she’s pregnant.”
“Son of a bitch!” His hand formed into a fist at his side. If it were any other time, he’d have found a wall to put a hole in, but as it was he gritted his teeth. “He was having an affair?”
She nodded again. “It doesn’t matter.” She adjusted to rest against him again.
“It does matter. You don’t do that! You don’t marry someone and then change your mind.” He couldn’t control his anger, and now he wasn’t sure if it was directed at Matt for leaving Madeline or Madeline for leaving him five years ago. Sitting there with her in his arms was confusing his thought process.
“I know I should be upset, but I’m not. I never loved him. Not like I should have.” Her shoulders dropped and her face turned into his chest. He could feel her breath on his neck and his heartbeat grew faster. “Not like I loved you.”
A sharp pain resonated in his chest. “You should get some more rest.” In his present state of mind he’d better not say any more. He kissed her forehead. “I’ll be here when you wake up,” he promised her as she rolled to her side.
He took the quilt from the foot of the bed and laid it over her. His mother had made it for them when Christian was born. It meant the world that she still used it and kept it close.
While she slept he made plans for the next day. He’d call in a substitute for one more day. He could afford to do that. They’d go to the doctor and he’d hear for himself how she was doing. From where he stood, it didn’t look like she was doing very well at all.
He met the kids at the bus stop when they got out of school and drove them back to Madeline’s. When Christian and Clara had made it into the house, he took hold of Eduardo’s arm and turned him toward him.
“You’ve been lying to me.” He narrowed his stare at his son and he could see anger rise in Eduardo’s eyes. “She’s lost ten pounds and has been sick for days. Her hair is falling out in clumps. She can hardly walk she’s so weak, and she sleeps all day. What part of that is fine to you?”
Eduardo pulled his arm back from his grasp. “Dad, she didn’t want me to say anything to you.”
“You needed to.”
“I was doing what she asked me to do. You’re so busy with Kathy, she didn’t want to worry you.”
“Too late.” It all boiled in his stomach. Madeline, Kathy, the kids…it all seemed so complicated.
“Why are you here? Did she call you?”
Carlos shook his head. “No, your brother called me from school because he was so worried about her. Ed, you needed to tell me. You’re not here during the day to take care of her. She needs more than you just making her breakfast and making sure she’s getting into bed each night.”
“Dad! Is that all you think I do?” His voice had risen to match Carlos’s anger.
Carlos rested his hand gently on his son’s shoulder. “No. No, I know you’re taking good care of her. I’m sorry.” He raked his fingers through his hair and let out a breath. “It kills me to see her like this.”
“Trust me. I know. I’m scared that every morning I’m going to go in to wake her up and she won’t. It’s almost a relief to hear her throwing up because I know at least she’s alive. I watch her when she falls asleep on the couch trying to help us with our homework. I watch her chest rise and fall. I ask her every morning to let me stay here, but it’s Mom, she refuses.”
“Of course she does.”
“I’m sure this is what happens on those meds. I asked Uncle Curtis and he said she sounds normal. But it’s hard to watch.”
“It is.” He put his arm around his son’s shoulders and walked with him toward the house. “I’m taking off tomorrow to go to the doctor’s appointment with her. I’ll find out all I can. If you have questions, let me know and I’ll try to answer them
or get answers to them.” He kissed his son’s head as they walked through the front door of the home they all once shared. Carlos held open the screen as Eduardo walked through, and he let out a breath. If only he didn’t have to turn back around and leave to go back to his own house.
It was almost nine o’clock when he returned home. Kathy sat at the kitchen table with an empty plate in front of her. A full plate sat in front of the other chair.
Her arms were crossed over her chest and her foot tapped on the wood floor. They hadn’t had a fight yet in their relationship, but he had a feeling they were about to.
The color in Kathy’s cheeks deepened and she inhaled a deep breath. “I came home as quickly as I could. I left Audrey’s house and made a mad dash home to make you a special dinner and spend the evening with you.” She stood and dumped her plate into the sink. Bracing her hands on the counter, she looked out the window, over the sink, and out into the darkness. “Do I even have to ask where you were?”
“Kath, I’m sorry.”
“I’m done with sorry, Carlos.” She spun around. “You asked me to marry you. Do you even remember that?”
“Kathy…”
“Why in the hell did you ask me? Why did you lead me to believe that there was a future with us?” She walked to the table and picked up the full plate of food. She then dumped it into the sink, turned on the disposal, and began to sob.
Carlos moved to her and laid his hand on her back. He reached around her and turned off the disposal and absorbed the sound of her sobbing.
Kathy shook her head. “I knew from the moment I met you that I wasn’t Madeline. I don’t look like her. I’m not as smart as her. I’m not anything like her.”
“No you’re not,” he said softly turning her toward him. “You’re completely you, and that’s what I love.”
“But since she’s been sick, you’ve done nothing but spend your time with her.”
“I know.”
“It’s as if I don’t exist.”
“That’s not true.” He pulled her into his arms, and she rested her head against his chest.
“I miss you. I miss the kids. I feel like her husband left her so my family left me.”
His heart was racing. He hadn’t meant to hurt her, but he was. Zach had been right. Sooner or later Kathy was going to break, and he suspected she’d hit her breaking point. But he couldn’t leave Maddie. She needed him too. The only thing he could do was be honest with Kathy.
“Listen,” he said pushing her back to look into her damp blue eyes. “I love you. So I need to tell you what’s going on. I need to be there for Madeline. I need to get her through this, for the kids.” She nodded. “She’s one of my oldest friends, and I share with her the one thing that has always made me whole. My family. I never meant to hurt you by caring for her.”
“I hate that I’m jealous.” She wiped at her eyes and pressed her body closer to his. “I hate that it bothers me.”
He pulled her to him again. “You have the kindest heart.”
“It’s getting a workout lately. I can’t shake it and it bothers me.”
“I know.” He ran his hand over her hair as if the touch could take away her pain, but he had so much of his own, no amount of soft strokes with his hand was going to heal her heart. “I’m taking her to the doctor tomorrow. She’s very weak, and I’m worried about her. Curtis says it all sounds normal, but she’s never down like this.”
Kathy pulled back and looked up at him. A crease formed between her brows as it always did when something worried her. “Are the kids too much on her? They could come back home.”
“No. Actually, I think they keep her going. But I want to hear for myself what’s going on and what’s next. I owe that to her and the kids.”
Kathy ran her fingers under her eyes, smearing the black mascara smudges that had formed. “I know my throwing temper tantrums doesn’t seem like I care, but I do.”
“I know you do. And I’m being totally up front with you, even if it seems like I’m not.”
“I know you are. I just can’t believe Matt wouldn’t stick around.”
Carlos let out a breath and backed away from Kathy. He picked up the glass of wine she’d left on the table, which she’d obviously poured for him, and drank it down. The sweetness landed in his gut, but the alcohol did nothing to dull the pain he was feeling. “He’s getting married.”
“Married?”
“Yep.” He picked up the bottle and filled the glass again, hoping a second helping would ease the anger he had brewing over the man he once called his best friend. “They’re having a baby, isn’t that sweet?” The words burned against his tongue.
“Oh.” She covered her mouth. “That’s awful.”
“Some stand-up guy.” He finished the second glass of wine and set down the glass.
“I really think I should go spend some time with her. I need to let her know I support her.”
Carlos gathered her back in his arms. “That’s what amazes me about you. You’re so compassionate.”
“I don’t feel amazing or compassionate. I feel petty.”
He laughed and kissed her forehead. “You’re nothing of the sort.”
“I’ll wait until you know what’s going on with her.”
He nodded. “Curtis thinks we should bring her to dinner at Mom and Dad’s on Sunday.”
The tightening in her jaw didn’t go unnoticed, but she smiled and batted away tears. “I think that would be wonderful for her.”
“I’ll talk to her about it tomorrow. But for now…” He hoisted her up to his waist, and she wrapped her legs around him. He planted a kiss on her lips that made her go pliant in his arms. “Didn’t you say something about going to bed early?” he asked with a playful rise of his eyebrows.
“That was the idea.”
He held her tight, pressing his face into her shoulder and wishing he could clear his mind of Madeline. “Let’s go mess up those sheets.”
Chapter Five
Madeline had paced the floor in the kitchen from the moment she’d awoken until the kids had left for the school bus. How was she going to talk Carlos out of going to her appointment with her? No possible excuse she could come up with was going to hold.
The point was, he was going to go whether she wanted him to or not. He was going to drive her in her own damn car if she refused to get in his. And no matter what, she knew it was the right thing to do. After all, she’d gone through the surgery without having told anyone only to find him by her bedside. He’d given up everything in his life to take care of her—she owed him that much, to let him go and ask his own questions. Besides, it would be good to have more than one set of ears listening to what they had to tell her.
She finished as much of her breakfast as she could. Her nerves twisted her stomach. With a gulp of her cold coffee, she took her medicine and then lay back down on her bed. Already she was exhausted. He’d be here in two hours. She had plenty of time to take a nap before she showered and got ready.
“Maddie!” She heard her name called in her quiet house. It was familiar—a comforting sound. “Maddie!”
She sat up quickly, her heart racing at a record pace. She sucked in a breath when she realized she’d been alone when she’d fallen asleep.
“There you are,” Carlos said as he leaned against the doorjamb to her bedroom.
Madeline rested her hand on her chest and calmed herself down. She looked him over, standing in the doorway as he had a million times before. He looked just as relaxed now, as a guest, as he always had as her husband. That made the uneasy feeling in her stomach return.
Carlos shifted his weight. “I knocked, rang the bell, knocked again.” He laughed. “It’s a damn good thing that husband of yours never thought I was enough of a threat to change the locks.”
She rubbed her eyes. “What time is it?”
“Time to go.” He walked closer to the side of the bed.
“I didn’t mean to sleep this long.” She kicked
back the covers and landed her feet on the floor. “I need to take a shower.”
“You look fine. We don’t have time for a shower.”
We don’t have time for a shower. He didn’t mean it the way she heard it, but it warmed her just the same. Oh, how she wished they didn’t have to go to the appointment and they could stay right there. Her mind had been filled with him holding her in his arms, just as he had done the day before when he fed her soup.
Why was this man with dark chocolate eyes and handfuls of wavy black hair not her husband anymore? Where had it all gone so terribly wrong? She couldn’t even remember.
She swallowed hard and fought back the sadness that hovered in her chest. He belonged to Kathy now, just as she’d belonged to Matt for so many years.
“Are you all right?” He stepped even closer to her.
“I’m fine.” She smiled up at him then leaned back, away from him. She needed her space. It was as if the cancer wasn’t the only thing trying to kill her. Her emotions were doing their best to finish the job. “Let me get changed and I’ll be right out.”
“Okay.” He lingered with those dark eyes on her just a moment longer before he left the bedroom and shut the door behind him.
Madeline tapped her fingers on the seat belt buckle as Carlos pulled the car into the parking lot of the medical building. Nerves had gripped every muscle in her body and squeezed them until she felt numb. She fidgeted, trying to keep herself calm. It wasn’t the doctor’s visit making her nervous. It was the feeling that kept creeping into her heart when Carlos was around.
He must have sensed her anxiety. He placed his hand over hers until she stopped tapping her fingers, then put his hand back on the steering wheel. “So do you have any plans this weekend?”
“No. I don’t make too many plans anymore.”
He turned his head to look at her. “Come to dinner at Mom and Dad’s.”
“No.”
He adjusted behind the wheel and drove down the aisle, looking for a parking space. “Now you’ve hurt my feelings.”
A Second Chance Page 7
