Find Me (The Donovan Family Book 3)

by Margaret Watson

  Doors slammed and two police officers appeared. When they saw Mac's gun, they stood behind one of the parked cars on the street. The flashing lights from the vehicles glinted off the weapons they held. "Drop your gun. Put your hands up."

  Mac set his gun carefully on the ground, then raised his uninjured arm. "This is the best I can do. I'm an FBI agent. ID in my pocket."

  "You." One of the cops pointed her gun at Lizzy, who was giving Franny the signal to stand down. "Hands in the air. Now." The hole in the end of the gun barrel looked enormous. As the two cops edged out from the protection of the car, the woman cop asked Lizzy, "You have any weapons?"

  "A...a knife. It's over there somewhere." She waved toward the grass.

  "Don't move," the cop ordered.

  Fear and adrenaline raced through her, making her whole body shake. "It's okay," Mac said in a low voice. "Standard procedure. They don't know us or know what's going on."

  The two police officers approached slowly, and two more jogged toward them from another squad car. The first officer holstered her gun and patted Lizzy down. "She's clean." Then she turned to Mac.

  When she reached his ankle, she pulled a small gun from an ankle holster. She slid it into a plastic bag, then pulled out Mac's wallet. The light glinted off Mac's badge when he opened it.

  The woman looked from Mac's picture to his ID card, then closed the wallet. "He's a Fibbie," she called to her partner. "You can put your hand down," she told Mac.

  "That's Derek Jacobsen," Mac said, nodding toward the man on the sidewalk. "He's wanted for the murder of another FBI agent."

  The woman's gaze sharpened. "Got it. We'll take it from here."

  The blood on Mac's arm was shiny in the darkness, and the cop waved to a paramedic. "Got an injury here."

  "Two of them," Mac said, gesturing toward Jacobsen. "He's got a knife wound. Maybe a broken arm." Another paramedic hurried toward the man lying on the sidewalk.

  Lizzy stood to the side, watching a paramedic examine Mac. Her heart racing, she waited until the young blond man stepped away from Mac. "Is he okay?" she asked the EMT.

  "Gonna be fine," the paramedic assured her. "Just an in and out. Needs some stitches, going to be sore for awhile, but that's about it." He took Mac's good arm and led him toward an ambulance.

  She started to follow and winced when she put her weight on her injured ankle. Her crutches lay in the grass, and Franny was sitting next to them. She limped toward her dog as a car screeched to a stop in the street.

  More police – lights on the roof flashed blue and red. As Lizzy reached for her crutches, two familiar figures were running toward her. Connor and Mia.

  Mia wrapped her in a crushing hug. "What happened? You okay? Where's Mac?"

  "In the ambulance." Lizzy gestured toward the street. "He was shot. In the arm. The paramedic said it was going to be okay."

  She nodded toward Jacobsen, who was being loaded onto a stretcher. "That's Jacobsen. He showed up."

  "Yeah," Connor said, scowling. "We talked to Jennings. The captain never sent him and Cooper to the airport." He stared at Jacbosen, being tended to by the paramedics, and flexed his fist. "Once we realized our captain had to be working with that dirtbag, we figured Jacobsen would show up. That's why we're here."

  Mac was sitting on the gurney in the back of the ambulance. One of the paramedics was starting an IV in his uninjured arm, and Lizzy started toward them. "I need to go to the hospital with Mac." She tried to climb inside, but it was impossible to get up the step with her injured ankle. She needed to be with Mac. To be sure he was all right.

  Mia pulled her gently away from the ambulance. "We'll drive you. Let's go."

  Franny sat on the sidewalk, watching. Lizzy couldn't believe she'd forgotten about her dog. "Wait. I can't leave Franny." She looked from her dog to the ambulance. Stay here with Franny? Go with Mac? Her lip began to tremble. "I don't know what to do with her."

  "Bring her with us," Mia said. "I'll tell Brendan to meet us at the hospital. He can watch her."

  Lizzy's throat swelled. They weren't just taking care of her, they were taking care of her dog. As Franny trotted to her side, the doors of the ambulance holding Mac clanged shut and the engine revved.

  Connor wrapped an arm around her shoulders as she watched the ambulance pull away. "Come on, Lizzy. We'll meet him at the emergency room."

  Chapter 24

  The chair with the dark blue upholstery was probably comfortable. She'd managed to sit there for the first ten minutes. But Lizzy's muscles twitched and her feet tapped out a nervous rhythm on the floor. Sitting gave her too much time to think.

  So she paced.

  Slowly, since she'd left the crutches lying on the lawn at Mac's mother's house.

  She couldn't get away from the hospital smell, though. That combination of antiseptics, cleaning solution, fear and grief clung to the walls and seeped into her pores. The smell of blood had clung to Mac before they'd closed the ambulance doors on him. Her memories of that smell would linger for a very long time.

  One of the late-night comedians told jokes on a television above her. The laughter made her hands itch to throw a rock at the screen.

  A handful of people slumped in chairs in the waiting room, waiting to be called. One boy, maybe five years old, whimpered in his mother's lap. Lizzy wished she could sit in someone's lap, have that someone smooth her hair and tell her everything was going to be okay.

  No. Not someone. She wanted Mac. Wanted to touch him. Wanted him alive. Alive and in her arms.

  He'd said he was fine. The paramedic had said it was an 'in and out', whatever that meant, and no big deal.

  It was a big deal if you were the one with the hole in your arm. It was a big deal if you were the person who lo..liked the guy who'd been shot.

  It was a huge deal if he'd been shot protecting you.

  Maybe the paramedic had lied. He'd probably seen her tears, the way she'd been shaking, and didn't tell her how bad it really was.

  "Lizzy." Rose had finally arrived, and she stepped in front of Lizzy and enfolded her in a hug. Lizzy wanted to lay her head on Rose's shoulder and weep, but instead she held on tightly. "He'll be fine. Please stop pacing like a caged tiger." She smiled and took her hand. "Come meet my sister Helen."

  Rose drew Lizzy toward a hugely pregnant woman who looked a lot like Mia and Rose – black hair, blue eyes, beautiful. Her hair was short and wavy, and she held the hand of a tall, blond guy sitting next to her.

  "Helen, Jamie, this is Lizzy. Mac's young woman."

  Lizzy felt a flush creep up her cheeks. "I'm not...I'm a witness in his case," she said, extending her hand.

  Helen shook it with a warm smile. "That line sounds familiar." She looked at her partner, adoration in her eyes. "Doesn't it, Jamie?"

  Jamie shook her hand, his eyes twinkling. "Yeah, I remember hearing something along those lines. Later, it morphed into, 'he's too young for me'." He put his hand on Helen's belly, leaned over and kissed his wife. "Now she's my wife. Having a baby."

  "Very nice to meet you both." She glanced at the door to the emergency room and willed it to open. It stayed stubbornly closed.

  "Lizzy, sit down." Mia grabbed Lizzy's hand as she passed by. "You're making me dizzy."

  "I'll jump out of my skin if I sit down."

  "Just for a minute."

  Lizzy dropped reluctantly into the chair next to Mia. "You know he's going to be okay," Mia said gently. "Sore and cranky as hell, but he'll be okay."

  Lizzy jiggled her leg, unable to hold still. "How do you know? Maybe the bullet hit him somewhere else and he hid it from us. Maybe it's serious. It's taking so long."

  "That's because he's been triaged and he's not at the top of the list," Mia said patiently. She twisted in her chair. "Tessa, you've worked in the ER. They make the easy ones wait, right?"

  The woman with the long red hair, sitting so close to Quinn and murmuring something in his ear, turned to look at Mia and Lizzy. Her gaze d
rifted from Lizzy to Mia and back again. "Yeah," she said softly. "I know you're worried, Lizzy. If it was Quinn in the ER..." Her eyes clouded and she gripped Quinn's hand. "I'd be doing worse than pacing." She took a deep, trembling breath, and Quinn smoothed his hand down her cheek, tucked her hair behind her ear. "Mac's going to be fine. Stop spinning worst case scenarios."

  "Yeah," Quinn said. Mac's brother tugged Tessa closer as he stroked her shoulder. Comforting Tessa? Or himself? "I've seen plenty of that kind of injury. They bleed like a stuck pig and hurt like hell, but Mac will be fine."

  "Thanks, Quinn. That was sooo reassuring," Mia said, scowling at her brother.

  In spite of Quinn's reference to blood and pain, Lizzy found him oddly comforting. If his brothers and sisters weren't worried, maybe she didn't need to be, either.

  Didn't matter who was or wasn't worried. She'd be on edge until she saw Mac. Until she saw for herself that he was okay.

  Connor sat down heavily in the seat next to hers. "So you want to hear the news about Jacobsen?"

  His face was haggard and his eyes tight with pain. He was trying to take her mind off Mac, and she appreciated that. And she was curious about Jacobsen. "Yeah. What's going on?" She glanced over her shoulder at the door to the ER one more time.

  "The homicide lieutenant at my precinct filled me in". He swallowed and his jaw worked for a moment. "My cap...Captain Anderson was working with Jacobsen. He had racked up huge gambling debts, and the Asian gangs in Chinatown were putting pressure on him to pay. He went to work for them instead."

  He glanced away for a moment, and his throat rippled as he swallowed. "The tongs were paying Jacobsen for protection, and Jacobsen needed to know when the locals had plans to raid the gangs. So every time Anderson passed information along, more of his debt was forgiven. Worked out for everyone." Connor's voice was bitter. "The gang didn't have to worry about being caught and prosecuted, Jacobsen made a lot of money, and Anderson got his debts forgiven."

  "I'm so sorry, Connor." Lizzy focused on Mac's brother, who'd done so much for them. "It sounds as though you were close to your captain."

  "He was a father figure to me," he said, his voice rough. "I thought he could do no wrong. He mentored me when I showed up in his precinct as a green rookie. He encouraged me to take the detective's exam. And all along, he was dirty." He swallowed again and turned his head, but not before Lizzy saw his eyes fill.

  "He must have hidden it well, because no one else saw it, either," Lizzy said gently.

  "Not an excuse."

  "How was Kelly involved?"

  That was the right question. The pain of betrayal faded from Connor's eyes, but didn't completely disappear.

  "Kelly figured out what Jacobsen was doing when one of his snitches told him the gangs in Chinatown were protected. He dug until he figured it out, then confronted Jacobsen. Jacobsen said Kelly wanted a cut, but who knows? I'd prefer to think Kelly was threatening to expose Jacobsen if he didn't do the right thing."

  She squeezed his hand. "I'm so sorry your captain betrayed you."

  "Wasn't just me. He betrayed everything the police department stands for." Connor's voice was gruff.

  "Thanks for filling me in. You took my mind off Mac for a few minutes."

  "That was the idea." He leaned down and kissed her cheek. "You're good for him, Lizzy. I hope he's good for you, too."

  Oh, he was. And she hoped Mac felt the same way.

  Mac's family was good for her, too.

  She glanced around the corner of the waiting room the Donovan's had staked out. They were all here, and they'd surrounded her. Whichever direction she turned, there was someone of Mac's. And they'd drawn her in, included her, as if she was one of them.

  What would it be like to have a family like this? A group of people who were always there for you. Who had your back, who huddled together in the hospital waiting room when one of them was hurt.

  Even though Mac was in there, having his wound treated, he was damn lucky. His entire family was here for him, even though it was the middle of the night. Mac could call any one of them, anytime, if he needed help.

  What would it be like to be surrounded by that kind of love?

  She had no idea. But she'd like to find out. A wave of sorrow welled up inside her. Her family hadn't been like the Donovans. They'd been reserved. Unemotional. Quiet.

  She knew they'd loved her – her father had died because he'd tried to protect her. She'd had a great education, an interesting life. But there hadn't been a lot of warmth in the Monroe family. Less after her father died.

  Memories flashed through her brain – her older brother, patiently showing her how to catch tadpoles. Pulling her out of the stream when she fell in, then washing her muddy clothes himself instead of telling their mother. Letting her tag along when he went to the Dairy Queen with his buddies.

  Now he lived in New York, essentially estranged from her. Seeing the love the Donovans shared, she vowed to make things better between them. Mark was her only close relative. Now that she'd seen what a family could be like, she didn't want that distance between them.

  The doors to the ER opened with a whoosh, and a doctor dressed in blue scrubs walked toward them. "Family for Cormac Donovan?"

  They all jumped up at once and crowded close. The doctor's gaze skipped from one person to the next, then he cleared his throat. "I'm Dr. Garcia. Mr. Donovan is going to be fine. The muscle in his arm was damaged by the bullet and he lost a lot of blood, but we've sutured him up and put his arm in a sling. He's looking at some fairly extensive physical therapy, but there's no reason his left arm won't be as good as new."

  The knot of worry and fear eased in Lizzy's stomach. Her legs wobbled, and she sat down suddenly as the Donovans all spoke at once, firing questions at the doctor. Finally he held up his hand. "He'll stay the night so we can give him fluids and antibiotics. We're moving him to a room right now. He can probably go home tomorrow, but I'm not making any promises.

  "As soon as he's in the room, we'll let you know." He glanced at the people crowded around him and a smile flickered over his face. "Normally, we only allow two people to visit at once. I can see I'm not going to stop any of you, so keep it down. The nurses will have my head if you disturb sleeping patients."

  As the doctor headed back to the ER, Rose wrapped her arms around Lizzy and held her tight. The older woman shook in her arms, and Lizzy realized she was crying. "Hey, Rose, he's okay. The doctor said he'd be fine."

  Rose lifted her head, her blue eyes wet, and wiped away the tears on her cheeks. "I know. But you weren't the only one who was terrified. I was, too. I just didn't want his brothers and Mia to see me falling apart." She gave Lizzy a watery smile and let her go. "I know exactly how the woman who loves my son was feeling."

  Lizzy closed her eyes. "Rose, I can't...we haven't..." She swallowed. "This is awkward."

  Rose patted her hand. "You and Mac need to catch your breath. But I can see it in your eyes, plain as the nose on your face. Saw the same thing in Mac's eyes. So, welcome to the family."

  Lizzy couldn't allow herself to hope. She couldn't assume anything. So she shifted uncomfortably. "You have a great family, Rose."

  Rose glanced at the crowd around her. "I do, don't I?"

  Lizzy would not let herself think about becoming one of them.

  ***

  Twenty minutes later, the nurse at the triage desk looked up at them and smiled, motioning them closer. "Cormac Donovan is in room 437."

  Everyone moved at once toward the elevator. It moved excruciatingly slowly to the fourth floor, and as soon as the doors opened, everyone streamed out. Lizzy wanted to rush into Mac's room, reassure herself that he was all right, but she held back. He'd want to see his family.

  She leaned against the bile green wall in the corridor, listening to the loud whispers of Mac's family. They were all talking at once. If she concentrated, she could hear Mac's voice, low and a little raspy.

  She sank to the floor and put h
er hands over her face. He was in that room because of her. Because he'd been protecting her. She'd hear the sound of that gun going off in her nightmares for a long time.

  She had no idea how long she'd sat there before she felt a hand on her arm. "Hey," Mia said. "What are you doing out here? Mac is asking where you are."

  "You're his family. I thought you needed some time with him."

  "Yeah, we did. But what Mac needs is you." She tugged on Lizzy's arm, pulling her to her feet.

  As they walked into the room, Lizzy saw Mac, propped up in bed, his left arm in a blue sling. His hair stuck up in several places, and the purple circles beneath his eyes looked like bruises against his pale face. An IV line snaked from a bag of clear liquid to his right hand. But when he spotted her, his face lit up.

  "Lizzy. Where have you been?"

  "Out in the hall," Mia said, glancing at her. "Having a breakdown."

  "I was not..."

  "Save it," Mia said, smiling. "Come on, guys. Let's clear out. Mac needs some sleep." She glanced sideways at Lizzy. Her unspoken 'and you' made Lizzy flush.

  As the Donovans streamed out of the room, hugging her until her ribs hurt, she couldn't take her eyes off Mac. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and never let go. But she didn't want to hurt his injured arm. She didn't want to disrupt his IV. Most of all, she wasn't sure he wanted the same thing she did.

  Rose was the last one to leave, and she took Lizzy's hand, forcing Lizzy to look away from Mac. "I'm counting on neither of you being stupid. You understand me?"

  "I, ah, don't know what you're talking about, Rose," Lizzy said, glancing at Mac.

  Rose rolled her eyes. "Oh, I think you do." She let Lizzy go, then glanced back at Mac. "I know you heard that too, Cormac."

  "Heard what, Mom?"

  Rose snorted. "I hope the two of you have kids as stubborn as you are. I can't wait to see that."

  She disappeared out the door, leaving Lizzy alone with Mac. She limped over to the bed. He had a thin yellow blanket drawn up to his waist, and he wore a hospital gown that sagged off his right shoulder. A thin line of dried blood stretched down his left arm. "Let me see," she demanded, running her finger lightly over his bandaged arm. "Is it okay? Does it hurt?"