“I wouldn’t do anything to hurt her. Or you.” HuanJen felt something closing around his heart. His previous conversation with Slate ran through his head, along with speculation and fear.
“I know, I guess … well, we’re pretty close and I guess I should know those things. You know. To know?”
“I know.” HuanJen thought. “Can we at least use a different verb than ‘know’?”
“Sure.” Jade managed a smile at the joke. She had the sensation of holding something delicate in her hands.
“She needed me,” HuanJen continuedm “she was and is my friend. Before you ask, yes, I enjoyed it. It was for her, but maybe near the end my own needs had an effect. I’m sorry if you’re hurt. I know you had some concerns when you decided to stay with me.”
“I …” Jade plopped down on the couch next to her partner and friend. “Why are you apologizing? I mean, we’re both adults. More or less.”
“I don’t want to hurt what I have with you.”
Jade nodded. “Well, I … like what we have. It’s OK. I don’t exactly understand it but I trust you.”
“Yes.” HuanJen replied distantly. It was time. It had to be said. Someone had to say something.
It was one of those moments if, a scriptwriter had been writing it, both would have declared their feelings simultaneously in a glorious coincidence. However, drama took a vacation due to Jade’s readiness to open her mouth.
“I think I may be falling for you, HuanJen. You know, maybe even … ah hell … falling in love. With you. Maybe.” Her voice echoed with the force of command and a plea for gentleness. She felt vulnerable, terribly so.
HuanJen smiled, nodded, and looked into her eyes. “It’s OK, Jade. I feel the same way. I think there’s something there. I think I’d like to find out. I even . .. tried to figure it out today.”
Jade gaped, then laughed. “So did I. Sort of, did some research.”
“Yes. Thinking alike, aren’t we? Again.”
“Yeah.” Jade laughed, looked down for a moment, then back at her companion. “OK, what do we do now, cause this is not what I’m used to. You’re used to. Hell, We’re used to.”
“No. Why do we have to do anything different? I like us the way we are.”
Jade raised an eyebrow. She was in unfamiliar territory, the labyrinth of the heart. Still, in the middle of her chaos, his chaos, HuanJen was still the philosopher. Still at the root of everything.
“Yeah.” Jade nodded. He was right, really. She tried to reassure herself that they didn’t need to change anything, it was all working out. Wasn’t it?
HuanJen shrugged. Jade fumed. Damn it, he was supposed to be the wordy one, but apparently it was up to her.
“Well … we should … do something. Talk or something.” Jade tried making sense. She didn’t feel like she was doing a good job. Something was missing, damn it.
“Jade, can I kiss you? Please? I’ve wondered for awhile what it’d be like to kiss you.” The mystic’s words were heartfelt, as real as life or death.
That was it. HuanJen’s face swam into focus and her mind cleared. The world was suddenly simpler. The Vulpine put her feelings into words.
“Hell yes!”
Jade remembered how HuanJen smelled like a summer’s day, how his breath had been sweet and his embrace like a blanket. HuanJen recalled how Jade felt like a fire in his arms, her musky scent, the little sounds she made as they kissed. For a moment, time didn’t exist.
“I think this … I may be falling in love.” HuanJen sighed when their lips parted. His skin felt both lighter and hotter. “Truly.”
“I feel like I’m falling, falling so far.” Jade leaned against her companion. “Ah hell, was this obvious? I mean, well, I’m not sure, what I mean. It’s like this is suddenly real but it’s been real for a long time. It’s been happening.”
The mystic shrugged, and kissed the palm of Jade’s hand. “We make a good team. We’ve really gotten along since day one. Maybe it was building. Maybe it’ll develop. Maybe it will change. I don’t know. But you know what? I am happy.”
“Me too. More than … I don’t know when. And you kiss wonderfully.” Jade nuzzled the Fang-Shih’s neck sensually.
“Thanks. You too.” HuanJen ran his fingers over Jade’s lips, leaving trails of pleasure. “I don’t know. I’m not good at romantic things, Jade. I hope you understand.”
“Look, sometime I’ll tell you about my romantic past, and we’ll compare horror stories of our incompetence. I guess we can muddle through and give it a shot.”
“Now that’s a …”
There was a knock at the apartment door. The romantic aura shared between the two evaporated like fog in sunlight.
“A client?” HuanJen asked.
“Neighbor?” Jade counter-queried.
“We should actually answer it.” The cleric said reluctantly.
“See, it’s quick thinking like that makes you so attractive.”
Hand-in-hand, the couple went to the front door of the apartment. HuanJen peered through peephole, frowned, and open the door.
A disheveled Clairice Bell, her chestnut hair askew, her coat dusty with what looked like plaster, stood in the hallway along with two suitcases. Jade blinked, terrible suspicions haunting her mind.
“Huan, Jade. They … ” Clairice sighed. “My apartment just became unlivable. I need a place to stay. Please.”
Jade lay in her bed, thinking.
She’d rather have been sleeping, but her mind was racing, and when her thoughts drifted to the kiss earlier, her body followed. It had been an incredible day.
With a rather non-incredible ending.
Jade felt sorry for Clairice, despite Garnet’s earlier statements. Being a nurse at Metris General Hospital was stressful enough. Having her apartment being torn apart by the Historians had been bad, and whatever had happened with the sewage system had been worse. HuanJen of course, had always had time to take people in when needed, he was the logical choice to go to for help.
Of course it had to happen today.
She had bared her soul to several people, pretty much admitted she was falling for HuanJen, and had kissed a man for the first time in roughly a year. A quiet evening, cuddling with her mentor and possible boyfriend and talking had been in order, not Clairice crying, ranting, and going to sleep on the couch.
Still, Clairice needed them. Whatever she held against Jade, helping was what she did. Still it did, technically, suck.
“Hello, Jade.”
Jade found HuanJen standing over her bed. The moonlight illuminated his eyes and the white streak in his hair eerily, but to the Vulpine he was a welcome specter.
“How …” Jade began, then stopped. HuanJen was infamous for his stealth, and sneaking by the sleeping Clairice would have been no challenge. He’d once snuck up on a cat as a challenge.
“I wonder, can I join you? I won’t do anything untoward.”
“If you do I’ll kick you into sopranohood.” Jade made room for her partner/teacher/boyfriend/whatever. HuanJen slipped under the bedcovers and curled himself around her in a warm embrace.
“So what brings you here beside the obvious?” Jade was surprised at the flirtatious edge of her voice.
HuanJen nuzzled Jade’s neck, delighting in her scent. “Only the obvious. I just wanted some time for us after everything.”
“Confused too?”
“It’s really a blank to me.” HuanJen admitted. “I never really thought I’d find someone to share all this with. I still feel good.”
Jade stroked HuanJen’s thick head of hair. “I do too. In Colony it was either arranged marriages or futile affairs in private. Lets face it, I’m not married.”
“I understand. And no, I don’t have a problem with it. I’m no virgin either, though that’s rather obvious after today.”
“You’re pure in your own way.” Jade kissed HuanJen on the forehead.
“So are you.”
HuanJen looked up at Jade
. Her green eyes were luminous in the dark, like stars. You could fall into them and catch on fire and never go out.
“Nothing’s changed,” Jade said softly. “It’s the same as it’s been for awhile, we’re just admitting that maybe there’s more. It’s real.”
“Yes. I can’t imagine you not being here, Jade.”
“Same here.” Jade sighed as HuanJen pulled her closer. “You know, you ought to go back to your bed, I … well Clairice has gone through a lot and … if we fall asleep together, you know. Things.”
“I think I’d like to sleep here, but that would be presumptious.”
“I know. Me too. But Clairice is out there, and … well, we’ll see.”
“I understand. Goodnight, Jade.” HuanJen kissed her on the lips, letting his tongue play lightly over hers. With a final caress of her face, he vanished into the darkness.
Jade lay back in bed, feeling herself drifting off. There was only one thing to say before sleep claimed her.
“What a fucking day …”
Actually, she reflected, if it had been that kind of day things would have been remarkably more complex. With that thought, she curled up in the bed’s blankets, wrapped her mind around the feeling of HuanJen’s embrace, and went to sleep.
THE PATH OF BONES
November 2nd, 1999 - Xaian AD Standard
It was the Week of the Dead on Xai.
On many Earths, as autumn approached, there were remembrances of those past, holidays celebrating the change of life and the change of seasons. The Xaians native-born and adopted were adaptive above all else, and over the centuries holidays had merged and grown. Thus, the Week of the Dead was Halloween and a harvest festival and All Soul’s day and quite a few other celebrations all rolled up into one colorful package.
It was an enjoyable chaos of spirituality and remembrance, starting with harvest dinners and trick-or-treating and ending with ceremonies for the deceased. You could pick up skull-shaped candy from vendors and stores, and some of the restaurants got creative in ways that were best experienced than described. Temples and Churches changed their hours to accommodate more clients, seers and prophets were more active and more consulted.
For Guild Esoteric, it was one of their busier times. Of course, to truly understand how busy they were, one would need to be a member of the guild to appreciate it.
Jade Shalesdaughter, apprentice to HuanJen of Sanctum, was fully able to appreciate the Week of the Dead beyond her wildest expectations. She appreciated that her mentor and boyfriend HuanJen had done a great deal of work each year to deal with holiday demand. She appreciated that people became thoughtful and spiritual on the holiday, as well as irrationally scared of those past or regretful of things left undone. She appreciated that while HuanJen was busy that she, above all else, did the shit-work that as an apprentice she was expected to do.
However, the shit-work was about all she was ready to deal with. Clairice had moved in with them when her apartment had become unlivable, after Jade had found she’d had some resentment over her friendship with Lorne. Something was up with Kevin. Garnet was busy, so no comfort there. HuanJen, her possible boyfriend …
That was another matter.
The black-furred woman sat curled at the desk in the study, a pile of books and papers at the ready, and some of HuanJen’s home-made candy from Halloween on Sunday. It was what she figured she was supposed to be doing, but it still felt a bit empty. “Baumgardener’s study of Week of the Dead Traditions” wasn’t exactly cuddly, even when you had chocolate.
Even when you had, technically, a lover or whatever HuanJen was.
She knew this wasn’t “it.” HuanJen was just letting her learn, encouraging her gently. They had talked about their relationship over time - he regularly snuck into her room at night to visit, chat, and cuddle. Life was just a bit busy with the holiday, her studies, Clairice sleeping lightly in the living room waiting to be woken by the slightest noise, and so on.
Jade just wished it felt like something more would happen in the near future. She felt like she should do more, but wasn’t sure what. Having so many aspects of her life combined was both reassuring and confusing.
There was the sound of the front door opening. No audible footsteps, which meant it was HuanJen. Jade checked the clock on the wall, a strange, gothic item her roommate/teacher/lover had acquired from a client. It was an hour before Clairice got off of her shift at Metris General Hospital.
Time. They had time.
“Hello?” HuanJen peeked into the study. To most people he was a plain-looking Chinese man, noteworthy only for the white streak in his black hair. To Jade, he was a welcome sight not seen for some time.
“Studying.” Jade set the book aside and ran to hug HuanJen. He responded happily, picking her up off of her feet for a moment. His warmth seemed to flood her.
“I can see that.” The cleric’s voice was both affectionate and didactic. “You did finish that translation of …”
“Tao Te Ching, yes, with the mention of the two major parallels. Just settled in with Baumgardener’s. So what’s up this evening, ‘boss’?”
“I need to go out again after dinner …”
“Oh.” Jade looked downcast. “I understand. Tomorrow?”
“Ah, yes. I do have something planned. A trip” HuanJen brightened. “Something special, something I’ve done every year since I came here. I want to share it with you. We need some time out.”
“True.” Jade took a few steps back and sat on the old desk. “So, what’s the plan?”
“I’m going to take you to the Ossuary for the Week of the Dead. I go there to pay my respects. I think it would be nice to go with you and Clairice.”
Jade’s mind began analyzing the statement.
Ossuary. The Ossuary in the Valley of Crypts. Repository of many of the dead of Guild Esoteric. Her so-called boyfriend was taking her to a big-ass cemetery.
Clairice. They were going with their accidental roommate and unintentional pain in her neck, the living roadbock to physical and mental intimacy.
Jade was speechless - and quite glad she was. Words like “stupid” and “moronic” and “insensitive” were clamoring to be used.
“I’ll go make dinner.” HuanJen kissed her cheek and turned around and left, apparently quite satisfied with himself.
“Well, damn.” Jade said softly.
Maybe this was “it” after all.
Dinner was something Jade didn’t enjoy as much as she’d used to.
It used to be her and HuanJen most of the time, and she’d liked it - peaceful, personal, relaxed. Now it was him, her, and Clairice. HuanJen seemed to enjoy having her over, despite the fact it meant he and Jade had less time together than usual.
Jade knew she was being jealous, and hated it. She and HuanJen … helped. They kept things going. They catalyzed. Clairice was part of their group of friends and a person in need.
She just had to be in need at a complicated time.
“And here we go!” HuanJen set down a plate of stir-fry between Jade and Clairice, then sat himself at the second-hand table. “And we’ve got some rice balls for desert. Enjoy.”
“So, anything interesting today at work?” Jade asked, trying to make conversation. She was still uncomfortable around Clairice, and hated it. It reminded her of how she’d easily set Slate off, and she worried falling into that behavior with other people.
“Heard that the Gendarmes are investigating Faith,” Clairice commented, “Mr. Alexander’s supposedly in on it.”
“I know.” HuanJen moved some stir-fry onto his plate with his chopsticks. He was the only one in the apartment that ever used them. “I’m not sure that’s going to go over well.”
Jade nodded. Trying to feel a part of the conversation. Today was particularly bad - last night HuanJen had not appeared for his recent tradition of stealing past Clairice and cuddling with her in bed. It was amazing how a few minutes of embracing made a difference in ones attitude - or what a
lack produced.
“I don’t know. Oh, still no luck with apartments. I think I may give up on suing my landlord.”
“At least you’re only one person., Jade added. “You could be going through what Lorne’s going through with Randy. Or Brandon …”
“No kidding.” HuanJen and Clairice chimed in at the same time. Brandon’s love life and strange work hours played havoc with his living situation. It was probably more a wonder that Clairice was crashing on the couch instead of him.
Jade groped for more to talk about, trying to build on her success. Would Clairice want to hear about her recent studies? Or Mrs. Kline’s arthritis? Dinner dragged on, Jade barely participating in the discussions. HuanJen and Clairice didn’t seem to notice her distress.
When she was done, the apprentice mystic retreated to the study. She didn’t want to be there, but she was feeling more unwelcome all the time.
And feeling like a bitch. Of all the ways to act …
“Jade?”
It was HuanJen at the door. Jade sighed and slumped at the desk. “Yeah. Sorry I wasn’t too social.”
“Jade, Clairice needs our help. You know its quite a nasty experience for her, and … it’s not just her, is it?”
“No.” Jade’s voice was a few degrees above freezing.
“It’s not the job or the apprenticeship?”
“No.”
HuanJen looked at his feet, then back at his assistant and companion. “Its me. What have I done and how can I correct it?”
“I …” Jade clutched herself. “The Ossuary isn’t exactly my idea of a … romantic experience.”
“I see. That wasn’t my intention.” The mystic’s words were sincere, but still held the hint of an apology.
“Oh.”
“Jade, its a very important week. This is the recall of the past and the present. This is about the continuity of life and death. Its only appropriate. It is an important tradition to me. Its one I want to share with you as my apprentice, as my friend, and as … my … girlfriend.”
Sincerity oozed from every word. Normally, Jade would give in when HuanJen was like this - actually he was sincere almost all the time. However, she didn’t like what he was being sincere about.
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