Wildflowers

by Melanie Wilber;Kevin Wilber

***

  Natalie heard the phone ring once, and then again before she realized she needed to wake up and answer it. Scrambling from the sofa, she remembered where she was and shuffled into the kitchen.

  “Hello?”

  “It’s a boy,” she heard her brother say, picturing his broad smile in her head. Patrick had said he didn’t care either way, but everyone knew he would be thrilled to have a son.

  “That’s great,” she said, trying to come out of the fog. She glanced at the time on the microwave. 2:36. “Is Faith all right?”

  “Exhausted, but otherwise she’s fine.”

  “Do you want me to bring the girls over in the morning?”

  “No. I’ll come home in a bit and bring them back with me after breakfast. You go back to sleep.”

  Natalie didn’t argue and curled back up on the couch. She fell asleep quickly but had the strangest dream. She was in the hospital. Josie sat on a stool beside the bed, and someone else sat on the other side, but she couldn’t see his face. His voice offered encouraging and soothing words.

  “The baby is coming,” Josie said. “Get ready to push.”

  “Baby? What baby?”

  “Yours, silly. That’s why you’re here.”

  She turned to look at the face belonging to the male voice. He grasped her hand and smiled. “We have a son,” he said.

  Natalie awoke to see the sunlight flooding the room. Touching her flat tummy, she felt relieved. The dream had been so real. Michael had been smiling like in the picture she had taken of him.

  She pushed herself up, not wanting to fall back asleep and dream anymore. “That was too weird,” she said out loud. She’d never dreamed about having a baby before, and a strange feeling remained with her for the rest of the morning.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  “Let’s go straight to the hospital,” Josie said, hopping into the back seat of Natalie’s car in the airport parking structure.

  “Hold on.” Natalie put on her seat belt and exchanged amused glances with Brandon. “The little guy isn’t going to get up and run out or anything.”

  “Oh hush! You got to see him this morning.”

  Natalie backed out of the space in the parking garage and followed the arrows leading out of the concrete maze. After stopping at the toll booth to pay the fare for an hour of parking, she sped onto Airport Way and took the onramp to the freeway.

  “Did you like Disneyland, Tommy?”

  “Yeah! Brandon went on the scary rides with me. But I didn’t like the one that was all dark.”

  “I don’t like the dark either,” she said.

  Tommy told her all about their week. He sounded like he enjoyed Sea World the best. “I got a big poster of a whale I can put up in my new room.”

  “I don’t want to think about how much I have to do before Monday,” Josie said. “Whose idea was it to move three days after we got back? Oh yes--mine.”

  Brandon looked over his shoulder. “We’ll do fine, honey. Don’t worry.”

  Natalie smiled at the tenderness in his voice. He had always been loving and supportive of her sister, but she could hear the difference being married for two weeks had made. His words held a more intimate quality to them.

  Suddenly Natalie felt an overwhelming urge to have someone take care of her like that. Someone she could count on that would support her through difficult times. Her independent side denied any such feelings, but her heart knew the truth.

  They invaded Faith’s hospital room bringing gifts and balloons and flowers they had purchased at the gift shop. Josie insisted on holding the eight pound bundle they had named Patrick Richard Matthews IV but planned to call Ricky. He had a tuft of light brown hair and a ruddy complexion. Faith said he looked exactly like Aleisha did when she was born.

  “I suppose we better go,” Josie said after they had been there a good long time. “Little Ricky is sleeping and so should you, Faith.”

  “Yes, Nurse Matthews,” Faith replied. “Oops! I mean Mitchell. Forgive me, I was up most of the night.”

  They left Faith to rest and went to grab some dinner before returning to the apartment to get as much packing done as possible. Josie expressed her appreciation for how much she had already accomplished.

  “I didn’t expect you to do all this!” She turned from the pile of boxes stacked against the wall in the living room to give her a hug. Natalie felt happy about helping her sister in this way.

  They worked for several hours that evening. Brandon went to his apartment to pack his own things, giving Natalie a chance to ask Josie how things were going as a newlywed. Josie didn’t attempt to downplay her happiness. Natalie envied her sister more with each word she spoke.

  “Can I ask you something, Natalie? Something personal?”

  “Sure. My life is an open book with you.”

  “I remember you telling me when you were still in college about that guy you had dated for several months and then caught kissing your best friend.”

  Natalie remembered telling her about that horrible experience. She had come home to visit during Spring Break after Tommy had been born and cried on her sister’s shoulder.

  “You told me I deserved better,” Natalie recalled, taping up a small box filled with CDs. “You were right about that. Did I ever tell you he did the same thing to my friend--after he got her pregnant?”

  “I told you I was proud of you for not giving in to him pressuring you to have sex.”

  “I may have made a different choice if you hadn’t been pregnant with Tommy at the time. I thought, ‘If it can happen to Josie, it can happen to anyone.’”

  “You told me then that you were still a virgin and you were glad you hadn’t wasted it on him,” Josie went on.

  Natalie wondered why her sister was bringing this up. That seemed like a long time ago. She shuddered to think about it.

  “Are you still a virgin, Natalie?”

  Natalie stopped writing mid-word on the box in her hands and turned to look at Josie. A smile emerged at her sister’s bluntness.

  “Yes.”

  “You are?” Josie leapt from her spot on the floor to come to her side and give her a hug. “I’m so glad.”

  “I’m not sure I am,” she admitted, laughing at her sister’s enthusiasm.

  “Oh Nat, don’t say that. I asked because I know the difference between being with a man who has committed his life to me and being with one who hasn’t. All the emptiness and insecurity I felt with Kent that I didn’t understand at the time, not to mention what I felt after he left me--I feel none of that with Brandon. With my husband it is so different. Intimacy has made us complete and even more in love. I can’t explain it adequately, I’m sure, but please tell me you will wait for your wedding night. I promise you won’t regret it.”

  The desperate plea in her sister’s voice made her want to say she would wait, but she didn’t know if she could promise her that. What if she fell in love with someone really great but she wasn’t certain about wanting to make a lifetime commitment? She wasn’t sure if marriage was for her.

  “You don’t have to answer,” Josie said. “But please keep what I said in mind, okay?”

  ***

  “What were you and Michael talking about after church?” Josie asked on Sunday afternoon after Brandon had taken Tommy to go swimming. They had more packing to do but had decided to take a break.

  Natalie took a sip from her water bottle and tried to sound casual. She didn’t want to tell Josie about Michael asking her to the concert until she knew more about his intentions toward her.

  “I had mentioned I’d like to hear his band play sometime, so he invited me to a praise service being held at a church in Vancouver tonight. His band, along with several other groups, are going to be performing.”

  “What time?”

  “I didn’t ask,” she shrugged. “I told him we would still be packing and I couldn’t come.”

  “Natalie Jasmine Matthews! You are not going to miss out on account of me. Ca
ll him and find out where and when.”

  “It’s not that big of a deal. He said there would be plenty of other times I could hear them. They play somewhere every weekend.”

  “Do you like him?”

  “What?” She let out a nervous laugh. Josie’s smirk told her how unconvincing she sounded.

  “Natalie, I told you how I felt about Brandon when you asked. Play fair.”

  “I think marriage has made you more of a romantic. Why do I have to have feelings for Michael one way or the other? I just met the guy two weeks ago.”

  Josie remained silent but kept staring at her.

  “Oh, all right. I like him. Happy now?”

  Josie finished the last of her iced tea. “Very.”

  Natalie reached for the phone. Michael answered and sounded pleased to hear she had changed her mind. He gave her directions to the church and the time the concert began. He said he would be waiting for her out front. His band was scheduled to play at the end of the night, so he could sit with her until their turn came.

  At six-fifty she pulled into the packed parking lot. After circling it once she pulled back out on the street and found a spot two blocks away. This must be a great concert to attract this big of a crowd.

  She hadn’t been sure about what to wear. Sunday mornings she usually wore a skirt or nice slacks, but with this being a youth event, Josie said the teens would be more casual. She had chosen jeans and a nice sweater. Approaching the front steps, she scanned the area for Michael but didn’t see him. She waited outside the doors until seven and then stepped inside, hearing murmuring voices coming from the foyer and auditorium. She could see the seats were filling up and decided to try and find a place, wondering where Michael was. Maybe they were running late.

  Finding an empty space on the end of one of the long benches near the back, she continued looking for him among the sea of faces. After a few minutes of shifting her gaze from the people surrounding her to one of the many doors opening to the amphitheater style setting, she heard a familiar voice coming through the speakers. She saw Michael on the stage speaking into the microphone and standing behind a keyboard. Three other guys were with him. One on drums, one on electric guitar, another on bass.

  “How’s everyone doing tonight?” his voice boomed.

  Cheers rippled all around her. The mood in the large room felt electric. Natalie had never experienced anything like it in a church before.

  “Great! We want to welcome you tonight. Are you ready to praise God?”

  “Yeah!” The girls next to her shouted, screaming like they were at a rock concert.

  “Your program says the Evergreen Praise Team is opening tonight, but their lead singer came down with laryngitis, and they couldn’t make it, so you’re stuck with us.”

  More cheers and whistles filled the room. Apparently many of those in attendance had heard Michael’s group play before.

  “We are Light The Fire, and we will be performing later this evening, but right now we are going to lead you in worshiping our great and mighty God.”

  More cheers erupted along with the music. Words appeared on the large screens on either side of the stage and everyone around Natalie began clapping. Natalie joined them and enjoyed the sound of Michael’s voice over the crowd.

  Not knowing most of the songs they were playing, Natalie clapped, listened, and read the words. The enthusiasm of the guys and gals amazed her. They were rowdy and excited. A mixture of upbeat music and more mellow songs were a part of the Sunday services at Emmanuel, but the people kept relatively calm. Sometimes clapping, sometimes lifting their hands, but it was never this loud. These teenagers were fired up like they were at a high school football game.

  They stood through all the worship songs and then Michael led them in a prayer. Natalie bowed her head and listened to his words. He believed in who he was talking to, that was certain. Something deep within her wanted to believe in something so strongly, but she remained skeptical.

  They sat down for a few minutes while the next group assembled on stage and introduced themselves. They were a youth praise team from Portland. Once they started playing, everyone stood to their feet once again. Natalie had no choice but to join them.

  “Is this seat taken?”

  She turned and saw Michael smiling at her. She moved closer to the girl on her left, but the space was limited. Michael stepped beside her.

  “Sorry about that,” he said in a low voice close to her ear. He had to or she wouldn’t be able to hear him above the music and voices around them.

  “I didn’t know we were going to have to fill in for the other group until we got here.”

  “That’s okay,” she said. “You sounded great.”

  He joined in with the singing, and she did also. She had heard this one at church before. Some of the others she knew, some she didn’t. But she liked hearing Michael’s voice in her ear. He sounded different close up than through a microphone. She liked it.

  When it came time to sit down and listen to the next group perform rather than lead them in worship, Michael had to squeeze in on the end of the bench and place his arm behind her to fit. She thought he might suggest they find someplace less cramped, but he told her otherwise.

  “This is nice and cozy,” he whispered.

  She felt her cheeks warm and dared to look at him. He flashed that same smile she had captured on film the day of Josie’s wedding.

  The concert continued with various groups performing two or three songs each and ended with Michael’s band playing once again. This time they sang several songs Natalie had never heard before. She had a feeling Michael had written some, if not all of them.

  “If you are here tonight and you don’t know Jesus,” he said into the microphone after coming to the end of a particularly emotional song, “I invite you to give your life to Him. He’s the one we’ve been singing about. He’s the one who has brought forgiveness and completeness to my soul. He’s the one who loves me more than anyone else ever could. Do you know that love? Do you need to receive it tonight?”

  Michael’s fingers began pressing the keys again, and he sang solo with light drums in the background. All eyes seemed to be on the stage. The teens that had begun the night clapping and dancing, now sat silently, taking in every word.

  Jesus, Jesus, you are my truest friend.

  Jesus, Jesus, you are my heart’s desire.

  You say you love me

  I don’t understand

  But I’ll walk beside you

  For all eternity.

  Jesus, Jesus, fill my heart tonight

  Jesus, Jesus, come meet me in this place

  Jesus, Jesus, my soul cries out for your love

  You are the way, the truth, and the life.

  The words of the song echoed around her over and over as Michael asked the crowd to join him. Natalie noticed the girl next to her crying as she lifted her hands in the air. She also saw several young men and women walk to the front of the church where pastors and other leaders were waiting to pray with them as Michael had indicated.

  Natalie did not sing, even though she heard the notes and words enough times to join in. She could not bring herself to say things she didn’t know if she believed.

  CHAPTER NINE

  Natalie stayed in her seat until the crowd dispersed. Michael had disappeared behind the stage after the last song, and she didn’t know if he would seek her out or not. He hadn’t said so, but she couldn’t bring herself to leave without waiting to find out. She hoped to at least have a chance to thank him for inviting her and tell him good night.

  She remained alone and rose from the bench. Heading out the door of the auditorium and taking her keys from her purse, she saw him standing in the foyer near the front doors. His back was to her, and she contemplated walking past him without saying anything. She felt disappointed he hadn’t come to look for her, but she didn’t need to act like it, and considering the way he had smiled at her when they were sitting so close, she did
n’t want to believe that meant nothing to him.

  “I had a nice time.”

  He spun around and didn’t hide his pleasure to see her. “I thought I’d missed you.”

  His words and smile chased away her fears. “I thought you forgot about me.”

  He laughed. “I’ve been standing here waiting for you to walk by since the kids were dismissed. I hoped to take you out for coffee and dessert.”

  “I’ll skip the coffee, but I never say no to dessert.”

  He had ridden over with one of the other guys, so they took her car. Being with Michael felt right. She had never been so comfortable around someone she had known for such a short time. Not even Samuel.

  They shared an old-fashioned strawberry milkshake at a restaurant on their way back to Portland. Michael also had apple pie, and she chose a slice of cheesecake. He asked about her photography career, and she told him at length the things she had done thus far and hoped to do in the future. She also told him about her “real job” as a teacher. He seemed a bit disappointed when she told him of her plans to return to California at the end of the summer.

  She thought he was sweet. He had a nice sense of humor. He listened well. She felt at ease with him and wondered what he thought of her.

  “Where to now?” She had started the car outside the restaurant and backed out of the parking space.

  “I’d love to say ‘anywhere you want to go’, but I’m afraid I’m going to turn into a pumpkin soon. I have a seven-thirty class in the morning.”

  “And tomorrow is moving day for me.”

  Michael directed her to where he lived. She had expected to drop him off at an apartment and couldn’t hide her surprise when she drove up to a large home in Southwest Portland.

  “You live here? I didn’t know waiters made this kind of money.”

  “They don’t, but orthodontists do.”

  She gave him a puzzled expression. “Do you have multiple personalities?”