Refuge on Leebrick (The Hills of Burlington Book 4)

by Jacie Middlemann

  Liana let out the breath she’d been holding without being completely aware of it. She had come here only because she felt there was no other choice. That and the very simple fact she simply couldn’t handle another major catastrophe in her life at the moment. It was all she could do some days to get up and get the kids to school with a smile on her face. She sighed, shrugged her shoulders in a way that made it appear to anyone paying attention that it took tremendous effort just to do so. “It doesn’t really matter. I’m from a small town. The entire population knew about it within seventy-two hours. Maybe less.” She tried for a smile and failed miserably. “There were likely a large number who knew before I did.”

  Mary heard the resentment and understood it but she also heard the lingering anger. It was that emotion that she knew the woman was going to need to get herself beyond the place she’d allowed herself to go. It was fine to hide out from the world and your surroundings for a while but eventually it served no purpose. At some point you had to come out of hiding.

  “Perhaps,” she agreed easily. “But whoever knows, and whatever they know, they aren’t talking about it. Otherwise it would have been splashed all over numerous tabloids for all the world to voraciously read about. At this moment few have a clue and that’s because the population of your hometown are discreet. At least to those who don’t belong.”

  Liana understood what she was saying. She even agreed with her up to a certain point. But when you were living in the midst of it…it simply just didn’t matter. The kids hadn’t heard anything….yet. But she knew it was only a matter of time before they did. And then what? She couldn’t find the answers for herself so how was she supposed to know what to say to them?

  “Liana.” Mary waited for her to look up from her intent study of her hands. “I didn’t ask Leslie to set things up for you to visit me so we could hash out what you’re being accused of in regards to your writing.” She watched the somber eyes focus on hers. She most definitely had her attention now. “I know enough about you…and your writing…to know with complete certainty, even without talking to you that whatever happened wasn’t intentional. And to me that’s what it comes down to. Besides that, as I already said the issue in question is so petty it borders on the ridiculous. If we were talking about a storyline or even numerous identical sentences it would be a different matter altogether. But we’re not.” She stood, topped off her coffee and brought the pot back with her to the table. “I wanted you here to see if there was anything I could do to help you. Anything at all I can do to help you to…get a sense of where you want to go from here….as it were.” She watched the other woman’s eyes fill, tears spill over quicker than she’d seen even in her own daughters. Knew without a word this woman hadn’t expected what she’d just heard. No, what she’d expected was yet another slap. Well, she wasn’t going to find that at her table. “Liana,” she reached back and grabbed the box of tissues that sat next to the sink. Passed them across the table. “Talk to me.”

  “I still love him,” Liana said even as she felt the sobs form at the base of her throat, struggled unsuccessfully to hold them back. Felt like a teenager when all she wanted to do was bury her head in her arms and let it go. “God, I still love him so much. Even with everything else, I do.” She barely got the last few words out as the ache almost broke her voice along with everything else.

  “Of course you do,” was all Mary said. And this was the crux of it, she thought sadly to herself. “He’s the father of your children. You were married to him for over ten years. How could you not?”

  Liana could only stare. How could one person put everything she struggled with into a handful of words? It came close to ripping her apart. And then put her back together again knowing at least one other person understood. “Yes,” she said. It was that simple.

  “And I would imagine, in his way, he still loves you.”

  Liana couldn’t bear it. To hear the truth that haunted her and she knew haunted him as well. She stood and paced around the small kitchen. “But not the way he did. Maybe not the way he ever did. I just don’t know.” She turned, her fists clenched at her sides. Anger vibrating through her in a way it hadn’t in months. Since she’d heard the words from the man she’d promised her life to. And he had promised his. “How can he love me? How could he have ever loved me when he loves another man,” she snapped, the betrayal still vividly ripe all the way to the very core of her soul. “How am I supposed to understand that?” And beyond the understanding she also saw heartfelt sorrow in the eyes of the woman still seated at the small table in the cozy kitchen that had home written all over it. Saw the understanding of everything she’d felt for months and hadn’t been able to put into words. Not even to herself. “And God help me, even knowing that, even knowing he betrayed me in more ways that I can count, I still love him.” Her head fell forward. Everything in her felt as if there wasn’t an ounce of strength left to draw on. “I’d give just about anything if I didn’t.”

  Mary stayed silent. She didn’t stand to go to the other woman as everything in her wanted to. She knew this was a moment that had to be carefully handled. She knew when she did, it would be with her thoughts only for the young woman whose tear-filled eyes betrayed her as they expressed so much more than even her heartbreaking words had been able to.

  “Liana,” Mary said her name softly only a few moments later. Even as she thought about the words she wanted to say she was making decisions that she’d left unresolved for weeks. “I’m in the process of buying a small house only a few blocks away from here. It’s a charming place. At one time it was the home of one of my father’s aunts and uncles.” She smiled at the attention that got. Shrugged slightly. She might not be in the process of buying it at this very moment but she most certainly would be by the end of the day. Pete would be over the moon. Again. “I’ve gotten in the habit of bringing some of my family’s homes back into the fold, so to speak.”

  “I…” Liana paused, uncertain what to think of it or what to say in response but sensed this was going somewhere. She just had no idea where. Before she could form a coherent thought let alone voice it the woman she’d long admired continued.

  “If you’d like, I think it would be wonderful for you to spend some time there. I have no real plans for it so it would just sit empty which doesn’t do anything for anyone. Maybe some time away for you and your children would help you to get a better perspective of where you want to go from here. You could think of it as a vacation of sorts.” Mary glanced out her back kitchen window, thought of how she too had sought refuge here at one time not all that long ago. “Burlington is a wonderful place. I know that it’s been good to me since I came back here. Not too small and not too large. You can be absorbed into the community if you choose to or not if that’s your choice. Whichever works for you and there’s nothing to say you can’t do one and change your mind later on and try the other.”

  Liana knew her jaw had dropped. Knew too she likely looked as shocked as she felt. The offer was unexpected and a godsend she never would have thought to come from this direction. Never thought to come at all. She had expected nothing less than a thorough set down when she’d arrived. Had prepared for it and God only knew there were those who believed she deserved it. Mary was right in that it wasn’t much more beyond petty and even then it hadn’t been intentional. But she had allowed it to drag out and become more than it was and for that she was unquestionably and completely responsible.

  “Liana.” Mary waited for her to look up and over in her direction. “Sometimes we need a place to hide. And sometimes it’s better if we can do that where few know who we are or where we’ve been, and even why we’re here whether we’re hiding or not. Burlington can do that for you. It did very much the same for me at a time when I desperately needed it.”

  “You?” It didn’t seem possible to her that Mary Lane would ever need a place to hide.

  “Yes. Me.” Mary smiled gently. “It doesn’t matter why especially since I’ve come
to believe it was something I allowed to become far too important in my mind. At least parts of it.” Mary paused as she considered the words needed to help to heal a heart so very much wounded. “I think it would help tremendously if you were to give yourself some time and space. Allow yourself some distance away from everything that is so hurtful now and maybe at some point you might find yourself able to come to some type of peace with your ex-husband.” She sighed as the younger woman’s face again conveyed such a profound sadness it near to broke her heart. “You will always be connected by the children you share Liana, such precious gifts the two of you brought into this world together.”

  This time Liana wasn’t able to hold back the sobs that had threatened to continually break through it seemed for months. And often did. “I know. It’s just I can’t understand how it happened.” She looked at Mary with eyes strained by the inability to comprehend how her world could shift so far away from what she’d known. “How could I not know? How could he not know?”

  Mary understood well the questions the other woman posed. But had no answers that would soothe. Didn’t know that any existed and if they did could only come from the man who’d set much of this in motion. “I don’t have any answers for you, Liana. And I just don’t believe that all the how’s and why’s you have can be easily answered any time soon if at all. But I do think, and I know this sounds cliché and it could very well be that you’ve already heard it more than once from others, but in time even if you don’t get the answers it may be that somewhere along the way they won’t be as important as they are now.” She waited as that sunk in. She honestly didn’t think the woman would remember much of what they spoke of. Not the way she was feeling. She accepted that. Liana’s world had been turned upside down and as far as she was concerned the only thing the other woman needed to remember was her invitation to visit Burlington for an extended vacation. An invitation meant to give her some time to heal. “So what do you say? Does some time in Burlington sound good to you?”

  Liana couldn’t think of a single reason it wouldn’t. On her way into the city she had driven around for a little as she got her nerves settled for the upcoming visit. She had thought of what a charming town it was. Quiet but filled with a lively spirit. She closed her eyes, pictured her girls here. They’d probably love it. Would most likely see it as some kind of adventure that none of their friends got to go on. And wouldn’t it be just that? “I know this sounds silly for a grown woman to say but I have to talk with my mother first.”

  Mary laughed softly. “Not silly at all. I have three children and love hearing from them. Especially when they think I know better than them.” And in Liana’s case she knew full well what her mother thought thanks to Leslie. “Just let me know. If you decide a visit here for a while sounds good we’ll go by the house before you have to leave town.” And she made a mental note to herself to call Pete the moment Liana was out the front door. She wanted to get everything in motion to buy that house.

  “I’ll do that,” Liana said softly. She already knew what the answer would be because she could already hear her mother’s opinion on it. But she wanted to hear it. Needed to. No one had been more steadfast in their support of her over the last months than her mother. She might not need her permission, was old enough to do as she thought best, but despite all that…maybe even because of it, she wanted her opinion.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  “So,” Casey drew the word out as much for effect as she did because she knew it drove Carrie nuts. She winked at her Aunt Charlie who knew it as well. “Pete is once again in seventh heaven thanks to our wonderful Mary. She doesn’t dicker, doesn’t bother with those little time consuming things most people do such as…oh, I don’t know. Oh, that’s right…mortgage companies and inspections.” She picked up her half-empty cup of coffee and debated on whether or not she wanted to risk her already shaky stomach just for the pleasure of filling it up and savoring a full cup instead of half of one. Sighing, she set it back down. Somehow…somewhere…Pete would know and not be pleased at all. So instead she revved herself back up and continued. “And to top it off she buys it sight unseen. Who I ask, does that?”

  “Pete walked through the house for me,” Mary said simply, a small smile on her face. Nothing was more entertaining than Casey on one of her spiels. She knew few who could do it better. Except perhaps…she glanced to her side at the one other person who came even close. “What do you think about it, Aunt Charlie?”

  “I’m more interested in this young woman you’re thinking to let live there.” Her aunt tilted her head slightly as if rolling the idea around in her mind and seeing where it settled. “What do you know about her other than she’s recently divorced?”

  “I didn’t hear that part,” Casey said, leaning forward so she wouldn’t miss anything else.

  “I don’t think you’d gotten here yet, dear,” Charlie said simply as she tossed her niece a smile.

  “Was it a friendly, we don’t have anything in common anymore type divorce or a I’ve found someone else type?” Casey asked, half in jest and the other half dead serious.

  “The second,” Mary said. “And Liana still loves him so this isn’t at all easy for her. Neither is it for their children, I would imagine.” She’d decided before this conversation that there was no need to share all the details of what had brought about Liana and Sawyer Farrell’s divorce. At least not yet.

  “How old are her kids?” Carrie asked, entering into the conversation for the first time since the subject had come up.

  “I’m not certain. But I do know they’re pretty young,” Mary said. “School age. When she called this morning to say she wanted to accept my offer to stay at the house she told me she was going to visit the elementary school they would be attending before she came by.” Mary had a strong feeling Liana was going to do more than just a drive-by of the school. She wouldn’t be at all surprised if she made a point of meeting with the principle and finding out what she could about who her children’s teachers might be. She would have done the same.

  “She’s jumping right in,” Casey said but she was also thinking about what her cousin had involved herself in even if it was only in an indirect way.

  Mary saw the look in her cousin’s eyes. Understood it stemmed more from concern than anything else. “I think she wants some time away. It has to be difficult living a stone’s throw from the man you still love. The man you thought you were going to spend your life with.”

  “Is the Dad going to be a problem in regards to their moving here? Even if it’s just temporary,” Casey asked. She could feel for the woman especially if she’d been dumped for someone else.

  Mary thought about her conversation last night with Leslie after Liana had left to wander around Burlington’s downtown area. “I don’t think there’s any battle waging between them in any way but especially so when it comes to their kids.” She chose her words carefully. “I really didn’t get the sense that there was any animosity between them at all. I don’t know if it’s because she still has feelings for him or because….”

  “She’s still in shock?”

  Mary turned towards her aunt. As always she’d hit the nail directly on its head. Just this time it was a little bit of a different situation than what she knew her aunt had in mind. “Yes. I think the whole situation and the way it came about pretty much completely out of left field for her hasn’t hit home altogether yet. Shock is probably about as good as a way to describe what she’s dealing with as anything else.” And with that she decided it was time to tilt the conversation in other directions. There was never a shortage of things to talk about. And for this instance she chose the newest cooking video her aunt had completed. It still never ceased to amaze her how much everything had changed for all of them since coming here.

  She thought about how not long after her own arrival in Burlington, Casey had arrived unexpectedly in the middle of the night after literally walking out on her job just before she was supposed to go on air with
her daily news show. It had only been a matter of weeks after that when her Aunt Charlie along with her granddaughter, Mallie, had showed up at her door, also in the late hours of the night. Just days later they were followed by Carrie who’d known instinctively when her mother had disappeared that her destination in all likelihood was Burlington.