Turned Out by His Hood Mentality 1

by Diamond D Johnson

  I looked beautiful tonight, though. Although I knew how to do my own make-up, most days, I would just really focus on my eyeliner, foundation, and my lips. I went all out tonight, giving myself a light beat that I probably didn’t even need because with or without the make-up, I was going to love what looked back at me in the mirror. Self-love was so important to me now because, for the longest, like I said, I wasn’t appreciative of this skin that looked like it had been kissed by the sun.

  My gray eyes danced around the mirror as I took myself in. One of the things I loved about myself was all the hair on my head. My coils were absolutely beautiful. Baby hair decorated my hairline, and I even had them in the back, so they hung loosely in the ponytail that my hair was pulled up in with curls spilling to the front. Almost three years of wearing braces in middle school had my teeth looking like pricey veneers that a lot of people were spending their money on these days. Twice a year, I went to my dentist, Doctor Maggie, to get my teeth whitened. Because I maintained my teeth, I didn’t mind smiling and showing them off. Deep dimples were engraved in my cheeks. It looked like someone had pressed their thumbs in my cheeks for hours because my dimples would often show without me even smiling.

  I mentioned already that I was 4’9”, and years later, I was still smaller than most women, but again, I accepted these things about me that God had blessed me with. I weighed only a good 110 pounds with breasts that were finally fitting a B cup bra, little hips, a super tiny waist, and if I wore the right kind of jeans, my butt would poke out a little bit. One of the things that I was happy about was the fact that I did have a little booty on this small body. When it came to size, I took after my mother because at forty-six years old, she weighed in at 130 pounds.

  I was still in my robe because I was waiting to go through the bags of clothes that Twinkle brought over for me. Although I smelled and looked good, I didn’t want to do anything but order take-out, climb in my bed, and find a good movie to watch until the movie was watching me. I was accustomed to a certain lifestyle that a lot of people my age would probably find boring, but I loved boring.

  I left my massive bathroom and rushed down the stairs to get the front door for Twinkle. My two-bedroom townhouse had more than enough space for me. Two years ago, I became a homeowner, adding that as another accomplishment. No need for a big house like my parents had because it was only me living there to fill all the space. It got a little lonely from time to time, but that was cool. My two-car garage was nice and spacious enough to house both of my cars. I pushed a beautiful, custom colored, hot pink Mercedes Benz G550. The pink was the color of my sorority, letting everyone know how seriously I took that title in my life. My other car was my white Mercedes CLA class that I mostly drove every day. I mainly brought out Barbie on the weekends.

  “Girl, I thought you were going to leave me out here and pretend like you were sleeping. You look cute. I love your make-up and hair. Oooh, I know exactly what you should wear out of this bag. Come on, let’s go up to your room,” Twinkle said, looking really cute herself.

  This woman was a true fashionista. She wore a daring black outfit—probably something that I would never wear—but it was cute. The jumpsuit was made of lace, so there was literally nothing left for the imagination. I could see her nipples, and I was sure when she turned around, I would probably see her behind too. She wore high pumps that made her look taller than she was, her make-up was done as nicely as mine, and instead of her long tresses being straight like it was at work a few hours ago, it was in wand curls.

  “Whatever is in this bag, I hope it isn’t as revealing as your outfit. You look cute, nonetheless, but not for me,” I said once she and I were in my bedroom.

  Twinkle laughed at what I said, and then she started pouring out different outfits from the bag and matching them with accessories. She had everything in the bag, from different heels to go with each outfit, purses, jewelry, you name it.

  “Why is everything that you’re taking out black? You don’t have anything with some color in it?” I asked, picking up one of the dresses off the bed and holding it up.

  “Billionaire’s favorite color is black. Everyone is wearing black tonight, that’s why. I was thinking about this for you. You like this?” she asked, holding up a latex outfit that looked like a catsuit.

  There was a deep dip in the front that would show off everything. I looked at her in astonishment because I couldn’t even picture myself wearing something like that.

  “No, I don’t. Way too daring. Twinkle, I want something simple. Show me something simple out of this lineup,” I said because I really didn’t see anything on the bed that I would want to wear.

  Don’t get me wrong, I saw some cute outfits, but there wasn’t anything that I could see myself rocking. If she didn’t pull out something quick, I was just going to go in my closet and find something in there. I didn’t want to wear black anyway. I liked yellows, oranges, and pinks. Those colors went well with my skin tone.

  “Try this one. This is simple. I have a bad leather jacket in here for you to rock with it too,” she said, holding up a cute, strapless black dress that I knew would more than likely cling to my little body; I could tell from how small the dress was.

  I didn’t want to keep complaining, so although this still wasn’t what I wanted to wear, I stood up from the bed and took the dress from her. Quickly, I removed my robe and stepped into the dress, being extra careful not to mess up my hair in the process.

  “Turn to the side,” Twinkle told me, and I did.

  “Yessss, Normani! You actually look like you have some cake back there,” she said, followed by a laugh.

  “Seriously, though, this dress looks amazing on you! I love it. You don’t even need the jacket,” she said and was about to put the very fashionable jacket back in the bag, but I took it from her, making her laugh again.

  “I don’t think so. I already feel so exposed,” I said, putting the jacket on, which went perfectly with the dress.

  The dress was short, but it wasn’t dramatically short. It was short enough for my daddy to probably disown me if he saw me in it, though. I put on the accessories that Twinkle had laid out for me on the bed, and I even stepped into the thigh-high boots that she brought over as well.

  There was a floor-length mirror in my bedroom, and I walked over to it. I couldn’t even lie; I looked really good. I didn’t look like Sis. Davidson, and neither did I look like Doctor Davidson. Man, I hoped that no one from the church or my job saw me out.

  After doing a once over and spraying a little bit more Chanel perfume, we finally walked out of my bedroom and to the garage. I was driving tonight, just in case I wasn’t enjoying myself and wanted to leave. We hopped in my Mercedes coupe, and Marvin Sapp’s Here I Am album was still playing from when I was listening to it earlier.

  “Girl, no! I love God, Lord knows I do, but unt uh, put on something else,” Twinkle said, already messing with the radio.

  I didn’t pay her any attention as I put on my seatbelt and then slowly pulled out of the parking space. According to my navigation system, we would get there in thirty-three minutes. Twinkle and I talked about a little bit of everything on the ride over, and when we had about ten minutes left, her phone started ringing.

  It was resting in her lap, and judging from the loving emojis that were used as a contact name, I knew it had to have been her boyfriend, Monterius, calling. The two of them were literally something else. The stories that she would tell me about them… all I could say was whew, and that man was something else.

  “Hey, bae,” she answered.

  “Twink, where you and your girl at, yo? My nigga working the door, and I told him to hit me when you get outside. Don’t stand in the line. Walk right up to the front like I told you to,” I heard his deep voice say through the phone.

  I had met Monterius on several occasions. He would often send flowers to the job for Twinkle, and she usually took her lunch break with him. I would never judge anyone’s relations
hip because it wasn’t my place, but from what I had witnessed about love, it wasn’t supposed to hurt the way that it was hurting her. Let’s just say that her man hasn’t matured yet in the way that she wanted him to, and he was giving his attention to other women.

  I’ll admit that I sometimes found love weird to understand. Men can have a beautiful woman with a good head on her shoulders, working, independent, and they’ll still treat her like a second runner up. Twinkle had come into work on plenty of occasions, and she simply wasn’t herself, all because she had allowed a man to have so much control over her feelings. She simply felt inadequate, or that she lacked something, which was causing him to step out on her.

  I couldn’t imagine loving a man with every piece of me, only to continually get cheated on. I tell Twinkle all the time how beautiful she is and how she deserves better, but this was one of those things that she would have to figure out on her own.

  “We’re on the way now, baby. Is Billion there yet? I can’t wait to see him,” Twinkle said, cooing over her big cousin.

  I won’t even lie. Part of me was kind of ready to see who this infamous Billionaire person was. To have a name like that, I expected top of the line. That was a very bold name. I liked it, though. It was unique, something that I had never even heard before.

  From what I knew, Twinkle was very close to her cousin. During our little outings, I would actually be around when she accepted some of his collect calls from prison. I never pried into their conversations, though, so I really didn’t know much about him.

  Twinkle never told me what he was in for, and I never asked because I didn’t feel like it was my business to know. I had seen the way that prison was portrayed on TV shows and movies. If he had to endure even half of that while he was locked away, then I only hoped that he would use his second chance at life wisely and change his ways.

  “He’s here. Nigga got all these fuckin’ muscles on him, looking like the fuckin’ Hulk around this bitch. He keeps asking about you too. How far are y’all, bae? I want to see your beautiful face. I miss the fuck out of you. I haven’t seen you in two days,” he said so mannishly to Twinkle.

  She smiled at his words while I laughed on the inside because it was so hood, but I guess it was cute in a way.

  “We’re less than ten minutes. I’ll see you when I get there. You better be waiting for me at the door, since you miss me so much,” she told him.

  “I’m already standing by this motha fucka. Tell your girl to drive safely. I’ll see you when you get here. I love you,” he said.

  “I love you too,” she told him and then hung up the phone.

  Like she said, in less than ten minutes, we were pulling up to the famous strip club, King of Diamonds. The line was literally wrapped around the corner. I knew that if I hadn’t heard Monterius over the phone tell Twinkle that we could just skip the line, then this would probably have been the part where I decided to head back home. So many cars were parked in the lot, and after circling for at least five minutes, I was finally able to find a spot. Before getting out, I did a once over of my face in the mirror.

  As Twinkle and I walked to the entrance, I tried to be confident because I didn’t want to look like I didn’t belong. I could smell the marijuana smoke from the parking lot. I couldn’t help rolling my eyes because I could imagine how the smell was going to linger in my hair.

  Twinkle made her way to the front of the line with me right behind her. When the security saw us, he instantly nodded and waved for us to come. Two men were working the door. They both were huge and staring at me like I was lunch. The looks creeped me out so badly that I ended up looking away. The whole time, I could feel eyes on me from both the men and the women who were standing in the line. I was so scared because I thought that maybe one of them was going to say something about us skipping, but no one uttered a word.

  “You are fuckin’ gorgeous. Damn, shorty,” one of the security guards said as we walked through.

  Twinkle grabbed my hand, pulling me into the club with her.

  I chuckled because she had to have heard the remark from the security.

  Once inside, I wanted to just crawl under a table and hide. There was way too much going on. My mouth was literally hanging open as I watched so many strippers on the stage and parading around like they weren’t nude. I mean, I thought they would at least have on a bra and panties, but no, they didn’t have on anything.

  So much money filled the floor that I couldn’t even see the stage; it was literally just money. The music was loud, blaring a whole bunch of curse words. The weed smoke that I was literally just mentally complaining about outside didn’t have anything on what was going on inside. I instantly felt like I was going to get high from just the secondhand smoke.

  Just as I was about to tell Twinkle that I was going to leave because this just wasn’t for me, she was swept off her feet. I looked over and saw Monterius holding her up. Twinkle was staring at Monterius with googly eyes, so I probably no longer even existed to her.

  Monterius was very handsome. He had a caramel skin tone, and one of the things that made him overly handsome was his green eyes. I learned from Twinkle that his mother was Hispanic and black, which explained his beautiful hair. He rocked a curly tapered cut, and he had a very full beard. He was super tall, coming off like a giant when he stood next to Twinkle.

  As Monterius looked at Twinkle, he smiled big, showing off dimples and perfect white teeth. He rocked an old school black and red Bulls jersey, so every tattoo on his arms, neck, and hands was on display. His black jeans sagged on him, and a pair of black and red Jordan 11s were on his feet. He wore crazy jewelry around his neck, and a gold Rolex on his wrist, with a huge pinky ring on his finger. He honestly looked like a rapper with all his jewelry.

  I thought I knew what he did, but I didn’t want to put that stigma on another black man. However, the things that Twinkle told me indicated that he was in the pharmaceutical business, if you can catch my drift.

  They literally freaked each other right there on the floor. As they kissed, Monterius’ hands were on Twinkle’s behind as he slowly bounced her up and down in his arms. I turned my head and noticed three women standing behind them. They were looking at Twinkle and Monterius in disgust. I wasn’t sure what that was about, so I turned in another direction.

  The overhead lights shined against the club’s main wall, projecting the words, Welcome Home Billion. The DJ was spinning what could only be described as a first day out song. I felt like I was living in the twilight zone as I watched what was going on before me. There was a lot of commotion in one of the huge, private sections. When my eyes fell on who I knew had to be the infamous Billionaire, I had to do a double take. There was just no possible way that something so beautiful was right in front of me. I mean, he was a farrrr stretch from what I would even go after, but still, he had a presence that commanded attention.

  He stood in the crowded section with about ten men surrounding him, holding two bottles of Hennessy as he rapped, “You ever been inside a Federal courtroom and fought for your life?” as the first day out song continued to play.

  Even with so many other men and women in that section with him, he seemed to be the only thing I could clearly see. It was that chocolate skin that I just couldn’t get over. Beautiful chocolate skin like you would see on black art that had all types of tweaks, glosses, and enhancements, but I was standing right there watching him, so there was no filter. His skin was amazing.

  I had heard Monterius say over the phone that Billionaire was huge, and he was right. He was buff out of this world. I thought Monterius was tall, but this Billionaire stood high. If I had to guess, I would say at least 6’7”. He wore a black, short-sleeved dress shirt with four of the buttons undone. Because the spotlight was right on him, I could see that the top half of his chest was decorated in tattoos. Although he had dark skin, the tattoos still showed. He wore black jeans that were sagging low, showing off his Gucci belt and the band of his Gucci boxers. S
imple Gucci low top sneakers were on his feet, and just like Monterius, he wore two flashy Cuban link chains around his neck, a gold AP watch, and ugh… I could go on and on.

  He had perfect hair that was cut low and in waves. The most perfect waves that I’d ever seen in my life, and I had always thought my daddy had the best waves. His mustache and long, thick, full beard that was enough to put into a ponytail was just too much to take in. Again, I had never in my life seen a man this gorgeous. As he rapped each word, I noticed the gold teeth in his mouth.

  I eventually stopped looking because I was sinning. I was in the middle of the club, lusting after someone who I knew I didn’t even want. Never for a second would I even think about dating a man like Billionaire. My whole family would more than likely disown me.

  “What’s up, Doctor Davidson? I see you let my girl get you out of the house tonight,” Monterius said to me after he and Twinkle were finally done swapping spit.

  She clung to his arm as he walked over and gave me a quick hug.

  I laughed at what he said.

  “You cool, though. You in good hands. Ain’t shit going to happen to you in here. Come on. Ima take y’all over to where we kickin’ it at,” Monterius said.

  I followed them because Twinkle would not let go of her man. We eventually made it over to the section where I had seen Billionaire. Two security guards were standing in front of a velvet rope that blocked entry to the section, but when they saw the three of us making our way over, they lifted the rope and let us all walk in. By this time, almost every stripper in the building had made it to the section, and they were putting on a show. I literally saw everything on these women’s bodies, making me feel so uncomfortable.

  “I’ll just wait downstairs,” I said and turned to walk out, but Twinkle grabbed my arm.