The Price of Passion

by Stephanie Morris

  “You did?”

  “Yes, but I’m wondering if you have any favorites.”

  As long as the child shared his last name, Kaden didn’t care about the first. “Whatever you chose is all right with me.”

  “What?” she responded, her eyes widening with fake astonishment.

  He liked her this way, he decided. Her hazel eyes had lightened by several shades. Her defenses were down, taking his along with them. This was the woman he’d held, the woman who’d swayed against him. “I don’t have to have everything my way,” he retorted, then added, “just most things.”

  Her grin widened and his pulse raced and jumped. It made him wonder how different things might have been if she hadn’t snuck out on him, if she hadn’t deceived him by keeping secrets, if she didn’t detest the idea of becoming his wife.

  She smothered another yawn.

  “I’ve kept you up longer than I wanted,” Kaden said.

  Sierra’s gaze traveled to the ceiling. “Where will I sleep?”

  “Where do you want to sleep?”

  She exhaled heavily.

  “Um...do you have a guest room?”

  What had he hoped for? They’d shared a bed once, but she was clearly in no rush to do so again.

  He told himself it didn’t matter. His body sent another message, though, one that was as difficult to ignore as the womanly scent of her.

  “Yes, I have a guest room.”

  While the minutes dragged by, she remained silent.

  Even though he was positive he would regret it later, he gave in to the need working its way through him.

  Making his way across the room, he crouched down near her and enclosed her soft hand in his.

  Their gazes met, and for a moment, he saw beyond the deceit back to the night they’d trusted each other wholly. He softened toward her. After tucking stray strands of hair back out of her face, he murmured, “I’ll take you upstairs.”

  “I remember the way.”

  He recalled taking her....

  Rising, he drew her to her feet until their bodies all but touched.

  Her breathing began to increase; he moved one hand to her spine, fining the indention and resting his hand there while he walked upstairs beside her.

  She didn’t pull away, a small victory.

  At the top of the stairs, she reached for the doorknob. On the second door. They both knew the first door was his bedroom.

  “Is this room all right?” she asked.

  “No,” he responded, placing his hand over hers before she could open the door.

  “I thought that one was yours,” she replied, looking to the right.

  “It is.”

  “Then...?”

  “Your room is across the hall.”

  She frowned in puzzlement. “What’s wrong with this one?”

  Reflexively, he tightened his fingers on hers. “This one is private.”

  So private even he hadn’t been inside for five years.

  The door to Jacob’s nursery had remained closed, and he’d prohibited anyone from entering, including the housekeeper.

  “There isn’t a bed in there.”

  “Then—”

  “Let it be, Sierra.” He knew he was being irrational, but that didn’t change the reality of things. “Your bedroom is across the way.”

  She nodded, but before she entered her room, she looked back at him. Their gazes melded, then without saying a word, she went inside, shutting him out.

  He turned to make his way back downstairs, uncertain of how he was going to get rid of the energy raging inside him.

  Kaden stopped at the door, reaching out for the metal knob. Coldness stung his palm, traveling up his arm.

  Locking his jaw, he walked back down the stairs. His boots reverberated with a solitary, hollow sound.

  * * * *

  Sierra walked over to the window, staring at the vastness of the land surrounding Kaden’s home. Cattle grazed in the distance, and a few trees struggled to reach for the sky. Everywhere her eye could see there were wide-open spaces, nowhere to escape, nowhere to take cover.

  She wrapped her arms around herself.

  The house echoed with quiet, unlike the way it had sounded when she’d previously spent the night here. Then it had been filled with passionate kisses and delighted moans.

  Now the air was heavy with tension. What had come over him, she wondered, when she’d almost opened the door to the wrong room?

  Downstairs, when he’d enclosed her hands in his, she’d looked into his eyes and had seen optimism. In a second, all that had changed. Despite the remaining heat from the summer sun coming through the window, she trembled. She didn’t have much choice in marrying the man, sharing her life with him. It would come with a huge personal cost to herself.

  Taking him as her husband was the right thing to do, she knew. The only thing to do.

  So why was doing the right thing so terrifying?

  Sierra saw Kaden move toward the barn, then lost sight of him. She tried to relax, but couldn’t even sit still, not now that her world had been turned inside out, making her question if she’d ever been the same.

  Quietness depressed her, and she couldn’t stay in the room another minute. Deciding to get some warm milk to drink, she made her way toward the kitchen, only to hesitate outside the door to the room he forbid her to go into.

  She shouldn’t meddle in his business. But she was going to be his wife, sharing her life with him, sharing this house with him.

  Sighing in resignation, she strode down the stairs and made her way to the kitchen. After filling a glass with milk, she placed it in the microwave. Hopefully, this would work. She needed to rest. The timer went off and after a quick test, she found the milk to be the perfect temperature. Sierra took a small sip, noticing that her hand trembled.

  Sitting down at the table, she allowed her leg to bounce up and down to soothe her nerves. She wondered when Kaden would be back, wondered what secrets he hid behind that closed door.

  Several minutes later, she gave up the internal battle. Climbing the stairs, she touched the knob to the door he told her was off-limits.

  Her heart pounded.

  Creaky hinges squeaked before reluctantly giving way. The air in her lungs dissipated.

  A crib nestled against one side of the room, and a fluffy blanket was draped over the wooden side, as if waiting for a small body to snuggle under it. A stuffed brown bear rested beside a tiny pillow, and a mobile dancing with cartoon characters hung from the ceiling.

  Unable to resist, Sierra entered the room, her footsteps muted by the thick carpet.

  A rocking chair sat near a changing table with an abandoned empty bottle.

  She placed a hand on her stomach and with the other, picked up a book lying on the rocking chair, its spine worn and pages discolored. Being a Good Dad When You Didn’t Have One, the title read.

  Tears sprang to her eyes.

  In that moment, she knew.

  Kaden had told her she didn’t know the truth about his marriage, didn’t know anything about his feelings for Jacob.

  He was right.

  The gossip mongers had been wrong. She’d been wrong. Kaden had loved his son; he wouldn’t have thrown out his wife and child. And now he’d be even more determined to take part in this baby’s life. He was entitled to that.

  “I’d forgotten I bought that.”

  She jerked, the book falling to the floor. Embarrassed, she turned around to face him.

  He stood in the doorway—filled the doorway—one shoulder resting against the jamb. His hat hung from his index fingers and his sweat-dampened T-shirt clung to width of his chest.

  “Kaden, I...” She trailed off, pressing her hand more firmly against her stomach.

  He shook his head.

  “I’m sorry.” She couldn’t prevent the heat from traveling up her neck toward her face.

  “You have nothing to apologize for,” he stated. “This is now your home, too. E
ventually you would have come in here at some point.” Those lines were back between his brows, but capitulation was the only thing in his deep brown, impassive eyes. “Haven’t stepped a foot in this room in five long years.”

  Pushing away from the doorway, he headed toward her. Stopping a few feet away from her, he placed his hat on the seat of the rocking chair and bent to pick up the book. His scowl deepened. “Being a Good Dad When You Didn’t Have One,” he read.

  “You were never given that chance.”

  “No.”

  She reached for him, wrapping her hand around his forearm.

  His head jerked upward and his gaze captured hers. She felt his warmth, his strength, the distinction in their stature. “Why didn’t you stop the gossip?” Sierra spotted the small tick in his jaw. “They were wrong, weren’t they?” she continued. “You didn’t kick Leah out of your house.”

  “Yes,” he muttered. “I did.”

  Sierra snatched her hand away. It was back, the coldness that hardened his brown eyes.

  “Packed her bag and threw it down the stairs.”

  Hearing the iciness in his voice, she shivered.

  “The rumors were true, Sierra. Don’t fool yourself. I fought Leah every step of the way in court, too, fought for my share of custody. Ended up giving my attorney more money than I gave her. Came close to bankrupting me.” His gaze didn’t waver and she could see the hurt in his eyes. “And if I had it all to do over again, I wouldn’t change anything.”

  Stubbornly holding his gaze, she said, “There’s more to the story. I know it. “

  “Is there?”

  The book in his hand told her more about him than the gossip ever did. “You cared about Jacob.”

  “Loved him with all my heart. The one time in my life I’ve ever loved anyone unconditionally.”

  The only time? Even though things had been totally horrendous with Tim, she’d grown up surrounded by her family’s love.

  “Then you wouldn’t have kicked him and Leah out without good reason.”

  “Are you certain?”

  She’d seen him fight already, had seen his concern for her. She wasn’t insane; she knew he was worried about their child’s well-being, but he had been about Jacob’s, too. “Definitely.”

  “Like maybe the fact Leah was cheating on me?”

  Sierra fought back a wave of nausea.

  “She didn’t come home one night. I told her to get out, that marriage meant people were truthful, that they didn’t have affairs or deceive each other. She broke down and cried, telling me she was pregnant.”

  Of course Kaden took her back. His strong moral code wouldn’t allow him not to. “What really happened, Kaden?”

  “Everything was okay until Gable Oswald appeared on my front step wanting his baby and his girlfriend.”

  Sierra struggled to remain upright.

  “Jacob wasn’t my son.”

  “She lied to you?” Sierra gasped.

  Kaden nodded. “And what really topped it off—”

  The void in the soft spoken words made her heart ache.

  “I told Leah it didn’t matter. Told her I wouldn’t tell anyone. No one would ever have to know she was a whore. I would have forgiven her for anything as long as she didn’t take my son away from me. No one would have ever known Jacob wasn’t my flesh and blood. Didn’t matter one bit to me.” He paused for a moment. “I loved him like he was my own. That was the only thing that mattered. I pleaded with her, asked for her not to destroy me and rip our family apart. I pleaded with her to let Jacob know me as his daddy, give him a chance for an unbroken family.”

  “Like you never had.”

  “Like I never had.”

  Hurt for him filled her heart. Leah had deceived him, then had taken his ideals, his emotions, his love for a child and trampled over them.

  And not that Sierra had tried to keep her pregnancy hidden from him, he believed she was no better than Leah. Their marriage didn’t stand a chance. She didn’t stand a chance.

  “Her response was to laugh in my face, declining my offer and stating that she was in love with Gable, that she wanted to be with him not me, that I would never see Jacob again. I kicked her out, just like the gossips said.”

  “That’s just half of the story, Kaden.”

  “Is it, Sierra? Are you certain?”

  “You were well within your rights to act that way. You didn’t kick a woman and baby out into the street. She left voluntarily and took Jacob with her. Even though you gave her a selfless option to do it another way. No one can blame you for that.”

  But the sadness in his eyes told her he blamed himself more than anyone else ever could.

  “I’ve always wondered what I could have done differently. Should I have worked fewer hours, not worked as hard to buy land, horses and cattle to graze on it? Should I have questioned her when she said she was going to lunch with her friends? Should I have requested she be home by a certain time, so that she was in bed when I was?”

  “You did the best you could. Don’t blame yourself.”

  He shook his head.

  Sierra knew all too well how easy it was to accept the blame rather than place it where it belonged. Maybe...maybe together they could learn to heal.

  “I’ll love our child with all my heart and soul,” he promised, reaching out to pull her into his embrace.

  “I know.”

  Slowly, he moved one hand upward, his fingertips sliding up the column of her neck, the curve of her cheek, then grazing her ear. He cupped the back of her head.

  “As my wife, you’ll have my protection.”

  She didn’t know whether his vow scared her or reassured her.

  His fingers threaded within her hair. She knew she should resist, pull away. Yet, somehow, she couldn’t. Kaden cast a spell over her, just as he had the night of Andy and Hillary’s anniversary party.

  “Please don’t do this to me, Kaden,” she begged, even as her eyes drifted shut and she gave in to the power of his caress. His thumb massaged her neck, soothing away the worry that had settled there.

  “Don’t do what?” he asked. “This?”

  He increased the pressure and her head fell forward. Even with her eyes closed, he inundated her senses. He smelled potent, of man and passion.

  “Or this?”

  His other hand joined the first, working magic on the knots in her shoulders. Absently, she wondered if he’d drown out her common sense along with the tension.

  Her forehead rested on his chest, and she reached a hand out to support herself, finding a fistful of solid muscle.

  At the feel of heat beneath the shirt, she froze.

  She was close, so very close, to surrendering to him once more.

  “Or maybe this?” he asked, skimming one hand down her spine.

  Sierra stepped back from him, wrapping her arms around herself to resist temptation.

  To her, he was more dangerous than a tornado, sweeping her up into the air and taking everything around her along with it.

  She’d never had a man affect her this way, she realized, drawing in breaths, one short inhalation at a time. He made her forget everything—that he didn’t believe in her, thought she was no better than Leah, that he didn’t want her, just the baby. Sierra didn’t dare forget, not ever again.

  He was overwhelming.

  And he was going to kiss her.

  To keep from embarrassing herself, she rushed to the safety of her bedroom, shoving the door closed and turning the lock into place.

  Resting her palms against the door, she shook her head. She’d been right earlier. She shouldn’t have entered the nursery. The result had been releasing a flood of sympathy for him that made her common sense float away like a wave crashing upon the shore.

  He had the ability to control her life, and he’d use it.

  That much he made clear.

  She straightened, backing away from the door. As she reached up to push a strand of hair out of her face, s
he saw that her hand still shook. His scent still lingered on her clothes. Marking her as his? She desperately wondered.

  Kaden’s footsteps reverberated down the hallway, loud like booming thunder.

  Then suddenly, silence fell again.

  She let her head drop forward. He’d stopped in front of her door. In rushing out of the nursery, she’d gotten a short remission, but it wouldn’t last.

  When he knocked, she jumped.

  Like a wimp, she didn’t respond.

  “When we become husband and wife, there won’t be any closed doors between us.”

  She trembled, but not from his warning. Rather, from the frightening realization that part of her didn’t want doors closed between them either.

  Chapter Four

  Needing a way to burn the energy surging through him, Kaden paced the kitchen.

  Just yesterday, his life had been peacefully ordered. Leah’s deceit and the loss of Jacob had been locked away, the key well hidden. Today, every memory had been dug up and revealed by his future wife.

  He pulled a bottle of beer from the refrigerator.

  The bottle opened with a satisfying release of pressure.

  Even if love wasn’t an option, he intended—in every other way—for them to be husband and wide. He’d share everything with her—his home, his life, his bed.

  Kaden took care of what was his—especially his unborn child. Sierra’s needs were secondary.

  He took a pull from the bottle, long and deep.

  Who the hell did he think he was kidding?

  It did matter what Sierra wanted, mattered a great deal. She was the mother of his child. Despite his threats, he knew she still had control as well.

  However, he was figuring out the ways to get past Sierra’s armor—soft words and a softer touch. He’d learned that when they’d danced, talked, made love.

  Sierra was a great woman, one who thought more with her heart than her head. After Leah, that was a welcome change.

  The thought of Leah brought his anger back to the forefront. The two women didn’t compare on any level. He knew that, but he’d still been incensed when he overheard the gossip at the pharmacy about Sierra being pregnant. Kaden had been even more infuriated when he found out Sierra had never intended to tell him about his baby.