The front door opens and bangs shut, Lucy reacts in my arms. I rock her gently as Stephen comes into the room, ‘ssh’ I tell him. ‘Sorry,’ he mouths. He looks pissed off, so I can only presume there is some damage in my house.
“Spit it out,” I tell him.
“Downstairs everything looks alright but upstairs . . . That’s a different story unless you tell me you have taken scissors to every piece of clothing you own. And I do mean everything.” I frown and sigh heavily. “From that look, the mess in your bedroom wasn’t you then?”
“How bad?” I ask him even though I’m not sure I really want to know.
“Well, there is nothing left hanging in your wardrobe and all the drawers have been emptied as well. I think he’s destroyed it all, although you may want to have a look and see if there is anything that’s not been damaged.”
“No, I’ll pass.” I draw my attention back to Lucy in my arms. “Well, beautiful, looks like you are going on your first shopping trip tomorrow, with Auntie Libby. Clothes shopping may as well start you off young.” I try to smile.
“Do you want me to come with you in the morning? Or do you want me to go and get you a few things from mine?”
“Yes and no, but in my tumble dryer there should be clean underwear. If you could get me those before you go.”
“Yes, but Lindsay must have some things here that would fit you,” Stephen says without thinking.
“No, I don’t think Ethan would take that well or how I would feel about it,” I tell him. He seems to understand and doesn’t push the subject.
Kirsty does get me what was in the tumble dryer before leaving. Having said that, I basically had to throw them both out. Neither one wanted to leave me on my own. But I gave them my reassurance that I would be fine. Jeff wouldn’t be getting into my mind tonight. No I’m sure a certain little miss, will keep me occupied for most of the night.
WELL, TODAY AND LAST NIGHT has certainly been eventful. I can now understand those mothers that spend the first few months of their baby’s life at home, not going out and wearing nothing but leggings and jumpers, not doing anything about their own appearance. Their sole purpose is to care twenty-four-seven for their beautiful bundles of joy. Well, seeing I’m only an aunt. And after the last few days, I need to keep up appearances.
Lucy was up only once during the night; she was an absolute angel. I fed and changed her and put her back in her crib and she fell straight back to sleep. I on the other hand didn’t get much sleep; I lay and watched her most of the night. I can imagine this is how new parents are always so tired, not wanting to take their eyes off their baby. I checked in on Ethan a few times, but he wouldn’t speak to me. I guess my words last night hurt him.
I packed a bag for Lucy, after the midwife paid us a visit, so I could go shopping with Kirsty for clothes. The midwife was lovely and very understanding of the situation we are in. She also said Lucy was adorable, and I really couldn’t disagree with her. She was a little surprised that I was going out with her, but I found myself telling her part of the reason. Again she was very sympathetic; she said if I just needed someone to talk things over with, to get in touch. I thought that was really nice of her, considering her job is to look out for the interests of Lucy.
Kirsty and I had a great day shopping, we even managed to get some lunch and feed and change Lucy, whilst we were out. It makes me think about the mothers who complain that they can’t get anything done with their baby; I’ve got loads done in a day. I think the secret is routine. But then again this is only day one and a bit of a novelty for me, but I’m confident I’ll still be in good spirits in a few days or even a weeks’ time. There is nothing I wouldn’t do for this little girl.
I’m not sure how we managed all the bags back to my car, between Kirsty and I, I think we managed to buy everything in the shops. Stephen was right, Jeff had destroyed all my clothes. So, I had to invest in lots of new clothes for every occasion and underwear. I still can’t believe that Jeff was so spiteful.
Stephen spent the afternoon with Ethan, or rather at the house, because Ethan wouldn’t speak to him either. Stephen assures me Ethan will be fine in time. He’s such a good friend, always around when he’s needed for both of us. Stephen being here with Ethan today was a plus for me; it meant he was about for the locksmith that was coming to change the locks at my house. Jeff still has keys and I don’t want him anywhere near me, so it was easier changing the locks.
I didn’t want to take the risk of Jeff making himself at home in mine, whilst I’m busy with Lucy. I’ve tried not to think too much about him today. I don’t want to dwell on what’s happened; although, I do know I’ll need to face him sooner or later.
So now I find myself sitting feeding Lucy, waiting on my parents coming round for dinner and to help me bath her. Mum has called several times, checking that we are all okay. The first time she called I was in a changing room trying on clothes. I get the feeling she wasn’t happy about me being out and about. I’m sure she will be fine when I tell her the reason why.
Kirsty was right, I’ve not been able to hide the black eye I now find myself with, it’s a belter. So I’m now going to have to tell my parents the truth. Well some of it, they don’t need to know about the rough sex. I already know what they will both say about this, but my father still has to have business dealings with him.
Jeff, after all, is part of the team that manages the business banking for both the hotel and Dad’s PR business.
I’ve heard Ethan moving about upstairs since I sat down. I checked on him as soon as I came home and was told to get lost. I had taken Lucy upstairs with me, but he’s not ready to see her yet. All he could do was shout at me, I get it, he’s hurting. It’s a shame, because he’s going to miss out on so much, in these early days with her. This is the time he should be bonding with his daughter, not shutting her out.
The front door opens and I know it’s my parents; I heard the car pull into the drive. Time to face the music.
“Well, look at you two all cosy,” Mum says entering the room. I turn to face them both. “Bloody hell, Elizabeth! What the hell happened to you? And if you dare tell me you walked into a door, I might slap you myself.”
“Elizabeth.” Dad’s voice mirrors my mother’s with concern.
“Hi, to you both as well.”
“Less of the sarcasm and tell us what happened.”
“Jeff and I split up last night.”
“Are you telling us he’s done this?” my mum asks, moving my hair for a closer inspection.
“Yes.”
“I’ll bloody kill him,” my dad shouts, startling Lucy. “Who the hell does he think he is?”
“Dad.” I lift Lucy and place her on my shoulder as I rub her back, trying to get her to break some wind.
“Sorry, sweetheart. I just never had Jeff down for this. Was this the first time?”
“Yes.” I can see my dad’s body sag, as he sighs with relief.
“Libby, can I ask how this happened?” my mum asks.
“Yes, he asked me to choose between him and Ethan and Lucy. He wasn’t happy about me caring for them. My choice was an easy one to make. So this is the result of what happened when I told him.”
“I’ll be in the bank first thing Monday morning,” Dad says.
“Look, it was dealt with last night.”
“What, did Ethan do something?” Dad asks.
“No, it was Stephen. Ethan hasn’t come out his room since yesterday. Stephen threw him out. I had to stop them from fighting in the front garden. I didn’t want to give the neighbours anything else to gossip about.”
“Good for Stephen.” I raise my eyebrows at the tone in my dad’s voice.
“Stephen was also here today when I was out, to keep an eye on Ethan and let the joiner into mine to change all the locks. So, remind me to give you a set of the new keys before you leave tonight.”
“But why . . . ?” Dad asks sounding surprised.
“Phil, why don�
�t you phone and order dinner and check on our son.”
“Is that your polite way of saying you want a word alone with Libby?”
“Yes,” mum tells him.
“Oh, alright, but I’m not happy about any of this,” he says, leaving the room. Mum takes Lucy from me and cradles her in her arms.
“Now, Elizabeth, I want the whole story and not just the bit you have chosen to tell us.”
“How do you do that?” I ask her.
“Because my sweet girl, I’m your mother and I can always tell when you are hiding something from me.”
So I tell her everything even the bits I didn’t want her knowing. I show her the bruising on my back and neck along with the bruising on my arms and hips. I tell her about the damage Jeff has done to all my clothes. She now understands why I went shopping today, but does tell me I should've phoned her and she would’ve come over here to watch Lucy. She is right of course. I let myself get upset about everything, when I really thought I was okay with it all. She puts Lucy down to comfort me and I break down.
“Mum, I don’t want dad knowing all this,” I tell her as I sob.
“It’s alright, he doesn’t need to know all the details. I imagine it would be very difficult for your father to hear. It’s been hard enough for me, but you’ve always been daddy’s little girl. That does not change now that you’re all grown up. I’m glad Stephen was here last night.” I can hear the double meaning in her words.
“Mum . . .”
“Oh, honey I know. I know. But he cares about you, a lot. You would have to be blind not to see it.”
“Mum . . .”
“Okay. You won’t hear another word from me.” She smiles. “So Ethan, how has he been? Has he seen Lucy?”
“No, he’s not spoken to me since last night. We . . . no I’ll rephrase that, I had words with him. Stephen had to intervene and I think they spoke last night but I’m not sure, because everything kicked off with Jeff. But I do know Ethan wouldn’t talk with Stephen today.”
“Maybe your dad will have some luck with him, although I find it unlikely. If he won’t speak to you then I know he won’t speak to anyone. I hope he comes round soon,” she says, looking at Lucy in her arms. “If he doesn’t, he’s going to miss out on so much.”
“Oh, Mum.”
“Libby, I’m sure everything will be alright. He just needs time to take everything in. Now how did the visit with the midwife go?”
I tell her all about the visit and I give her all the information leaflets she left for Ethan and me. Lots of information about baby groups, help groups for single parents. We both agree, even if Ethan comes round soon to Lucy, he wouldn’t accept help from strangers.
We talk some more about Jeff; Mum tells me it doesn’t matter what’s going on elsewhere in our lives, I should still be able to go and speak with her. I try telling her they have enough to worry about with Ethan. Her response is that, she’s my mum and never stops caring about me. Jane Stewart is a wise woman, who I love and adore.
Mum was right, Ethan wouldn’t speak with Dad. Maybe once the funeral is out of the way, it might start getting easier for him. But I have no idea how any of us are going to get through that. Just now, I have Lucy to keep my mind occupied, from the fact that I’ve lost my childhood friend.
Growing up as children, Lindsay and I did everything together. Walking to school every single day, except when one of us was off sick. We both shared the same hobbies, dancing and running. She was always at our house on weekends, staying over. I am going to miss her terribly. I know she had been a little distant with me these last few months, but I put that down to her pregnancy hormones and with her being busy at work.
We have our dinner whilst Lucy sleeps; Dad ordered Chinese, my favourite. It kind of felt rather strange, having dinner in Ethan’s house without him. Lucy timed her wake up to perfection, just as we finished tidying up. Mum went upstairs to run the bath for her.
Dad looks so at ease with Lucy in his arms, and she looks so tiny and perfect. He doesn't say much or pry into the earlier conversation I had with my Mum. I’m sure she will tell him some bits of it, although I hope she leaves out the part about the sex. Not quite sure if I’m ready for my dad to know such intimate details of my relationship with Jeff. As Mum said, ‘there are some things my dad shouldn’t know.’
We take Lucy upstairs and Mum has the baby bath all prepared. She explained everything I needed to know, with regards to checking temperature, and how to hold Lucy and wash her at the same time. I have to admit, I was really nervous about that. I know my parents are with me just now, but how will I cope when I have to do it on my own?
It doesn’t take long to bath Lucy and it really isn’t as hard as it first looked. I’m sure it helped I was being shown how to do it by the best person I know. Dad decided to take charge of Lucy after I’ve finished getting her into a sleep suit. He takes her downstairs to feed her, whilst Mum and I cleared up the mess we’d made.
I want to go to Ethan, but I decide against it. Giving him the time he wants on his own. I will admit it’s hard staying away from him, when all I want to do is go and wrap my arms around him and tell him everything will be okay. I also need to apologise for last night. I shouldn’t have spoken to him the way I did. He needs to know I still love him, no matter what.
Dad looks so relaxed when we get downstairs. I catch my mum with a silly grin on her face as she watches him with Lucy. They are both going to be fantastic grandparents, but that doesn’t come as a great surprise; they were and still are great parents. This little girl that everyone wants to fuss over will want for nothing in her life.
“What are you smiling at?” Dad asks my mum.
“Oh, just how good you look, sitting there with Lucy. Takes me back twenty-three years and it was this one who was in your arms all in pink. Ethan, you could never get him to settle with you. But Libby was always a daddy’s little girl,” Mum replies as she walks over and sits beside him.
We spend the next hour talking about the hotel. I am determined to get back to work after the funeral. Dad talks me into reducing my working hours for the first week. Mum seems happy with that, because she does not think I’ll be able to cope with working all day if Lucy is up several times through the night. We speak to Moria, to sort out who will be watching Lucy during the day. Mum and Moria agree to take turns, with Moria starting on Wednesday when I go into work. We all agree that Lucy should be looked after at home. That way whoever is looking after her, can keep an eye on Ethan as well.
I have to admit, I’m glad we sorted it out easily. I am also looking forward to finding some sort of routine for us all, after the funeral. We discussed the funeral as well. Dad thought maybe we should leave Lucy with someone on Tuesday. I disagreed with him on that. She is so little and I don’t think Ethan would be happy if we left her with someone else. So I’ll be taking her with me, unless Ethan has something to say on the matter.
By the time my parents leave, I am a little tired. But I have one thing I want and need to do before I can go to sleep. Putting Lucy in her crib, I turn and leave the room and go next door to Ethan.
I find him sitting up in bed, just staring into space. He doesn’t acknowledge me as I enter. My heart breaks as I walk toward him. I sit down on the bed and take his hand in mine. I take a lot from the fact that he doesn’t pull away from me.
He lifts his head and looks at me. He doesn’t look angry or upset with me. “Ethan, about last night, what I said. I didn’t mean any of it,” I tell him. He nods, more than I expected him to do. “I love you, I want you to remember that.”
“I know.”
“So you’re talking to me?”
“Libby, I can’t stay mad with you. You're my best friend.” He lifts his hand to my face and moves my hair. “Is this what all the shouting was about last night?”
“Yes, but lets not talk about it.”
“Okay. But has it been dealt with?”
“Yes, it has. I need to get back to Luc
y, can I get you anything?”
“No, I’m fine.”
“Can I bring Lucy in to see you in the morning?”
“Maybe.”
That answer is better than a straight out no. Maybe there’s hope for the two of them yet. I kiss him on his forehead before leaving his room. I now feel better, knowing that he’s not angry with me. I feel as though we got somewhere with our brief conversation. Maybe this is his turning point.
THE BUZZING OF MY PHONE indicates another text. I’m not sure I want to read what he’s sent me this time. My phone has been ringing and buzzing non-stop since Saturday night, with messages from Jeff. I have not replied to any of them, some of them have been quite disturbing, others have been pleading with me to get in touch with him. But reading some of his messages, I know I’ve made the right decision about our relationship.
“Who is that?” Stephen asks me. I show him the screen. “Libby, how long are you going to let this go on for? I can sort this out today. End of.”
“He will get fed up before me and today is not the day for sorting things out your way.” I’m very well aware of how Stephen wants to sort this out; he’s told me on more than one occasion. Violence is not the answer. “Ethan, can you get downstairs, we’re all ready to go,” I shout upstairs at my brother.
I have Lucy in her car seat, all ready. The cars are all outside waiting on us, including the hearse. Stephen is coming with me, in my car. Ethan is going with both sets of parents.
“Libby, we need to deal with Jeff and the sooner the better.”
“I will, but let’s get this over with first, and then I will deal with him. Can you go and see what’s keeping him?”
“No need, I’m here.” I turn to find my brother at the bottom of the stairs. It’s the first time in days I’ve seen him look so fresh. He is showered and shaved and has his suit on.
Stephen lifts the car seat and takes Lucy to my car. I wait until my brother is ready to walk outside. I take his hand and urge him to walk, which he does. But he stills at the front door.
Family Ties: A Captured Series Novella Page 6
