Rock the Cradle of Love

by Jen FitzGerald

  White rope lights line the underside of the trim on the chest-high walls. Single fixtures hang from the raised ceiling over the booths and recessed lights illuminate the freestanding tables and chairs. The walls are all light-colored wood paneling. It’s a warm cozy place. Friendly. Taylor feels at home, and some of the tension seeps from his shoulders.

  The bar is full, as he’d expected, on a Friday night. A few people look their way as they head deeper into the place, but no one’s gaze lingers as if they recognize them. Men holding hands doesn’t seem to faze anyone either. Taylor relaxes further.

  “Oh my God, Noah Drinkwater,” hollers a voice. Taylor stiffens even though it’s a friendly voice. He’s got no cause to be jealous either, so he takes a breath.

  The volume of the place drops and all heads swivel toward them. Taylor has no doubt they all know who the hometown kid who became a professional athlete is, even if they don’t know him personally.

  Noah lets go of Taylor’s hand and hugs a guy equally tall and broad as the two of them. “Aiden O’Leary. How goes it?”

  A handful of voices call out hello, and Noah raises a hand in acknowledgment. Aside from a few extra-nosy-bodies, the crowd resumes its collective game-watching and chatter.

  “We’re celebrating.” Noah tugs Taylor closer. “Aiden, this is Taylor, my boyfriend. Taylor, this is Aiden, proprietor of this fine establishment, but, also, he was one of my mom’s teacher’s assistants back in the day and willingly took charge of a younger, more ornery me. I think I was what? Twelve, thirteen?”

  “Something like that.” Aiden laughs and holds out his hand to Taylor. They shake. “Nice to meet you, Taylor.”

  “Nice to meet you too.”

  And it is. Aiden doesn’t bat an eyelash at Noah’s revelation. Huh. Nice.

  “What are you two celebrating?”

  “We’re just celebrating us,” says Noah. He hooks Taylor’s neck with his arm and smacks a kiss to Taylor’s temple.

  “Cool. What can I get you?”

  “Two bottles of Heineken.”

  “Coming right up. There’s a booth over there.” He points.

  Taylor follows Noah to the booth. Most sets of eyes follow them. A few people nod, others say hello. Noah nods and says hello in reply. Noah’s usually so keyed up about meeting his adoring public, but maybe the difference is, these are his people, so to speak. Taylor doubts Noah knows a single person here aside from Aiden. It’s nice to see though.

  The booth is round so they end up sliding to the middle and sitting next to one another. Noah leans in and kisses Taylor. “This is nice, huh?”

  “It is.” Taylor nods.

  The crowd cheers again and they glance at a nearby TV to see Cam Atkinson being mobbed by his teammates.

  “You think the Blue Jackets are gonna go all the way?” Noah asks.

  “I don’t know. I think it’d be cool. They’ve been shit hot all year.”

  “Yeah, but the Pens…they’re gunning for back-to-back. They’re not going down without one hell of a fight.”

  A woman with long light brown hair sets their beers down along with a bowl of pretzels. “I’m Johanna. I’ll check back with you boys in a bit.”

  They thank her and look at each other.

  Taylor’s finding it a little hard to believe that kissing and making up is really going to be this easy. “Is it really going to be this easy?”

  “Is what going to be this easy?” A crease forms on Noah’s forehead.

  “Kissing and making up? I mean, I expected to have to do way more groveling and suffering.”

  “Look, Taylor, I didn’t want to break up. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I believe you about the phone and your uncle, so it’s forgiven.” He takes Taylor’s hand and kisses the back of it. “But there absolutely won’t be any sex until we have several conversations, and I’m serious this time. We can’t…what happened can’t happen again.”

  “That’s fair. Thank you.”

  “Don’t thank me, okay? I contributed to what happened too, so it’s not fair for you to shoulder all the blame or to think I’ve bestowed some great honor on you by taking you back.”

  God, Taylor loves this man so much he feels about to burst. “All right, all right. You’re right. I appreciate you owning your part.”

  With a nod, Noah takes a drink and they watch Werenski fly down the ice ahead of a pair of d-men. His shot on goal is blocked by McElhinney, and Marner sends the puck around the boards behind the net.

  Taylor can’t believe they’re here. That their relationship is mostly mended. That they’re on a date. He turns to Noah and grins. “We’re on a date. And no one made a comment, made a face, grimaced, twitched, nothing. It’s like…it’s just normal.”

  Noah rests his forehead against Taylor’s. “It is normal.”

  “Here maybe, but not everywhere. You know that, right?” Taylor’s giddiness fades just a hair. He doesn’t want to think about what kind of reaction they’ll get out in the real world. Being a couple in a professional sports league is going to present enough challenges of its own come pre-season.

  Noah sighs, looking sad. “Of course I do. I may be inexperienced, and a hockey player, but I’m up on the ways of the world.”

  “Okay then. I guess we’ll face it all together.”

  “Together.” Noah’s grin is happy and warm, and he leans in. Taylor obliges with an innocent but lingering kiss. They keep their eyes open, watching each other until they break apart with a laugh.

  They talk about watching and playing hockey as little boys and as teens…Noah going through the US Hockey League and moving to Nebraska to live with a billet family; Taylor opting to finish high school, attend college, and play for the NCAA at St. Cloud University, where he’d earned an MBA. He figured it couldn’t hurt to understand how to manage his own career if necessary.

  They watch the Jackets game as much as they chatter until Taylor starts yawning and can’t stop. It’s been a hell of a couple of days and they’ve caught up to him all of a sudden, and he says as much.

  “Let’s go home then.”

  Noah pays the tab and they drive with just the country station playing at low volume in the background, holding hands on the seat between them.

  “I had a good time, Noah. Thank you,” says Taylor, once they arrive at Mrs. Drinkwater’s house, and exit the car. “I’ll be at the 350 Motel. Call me in—”

  Surprise flashes across Noah’s face. “What? No. Stay here.”

  “You sure?” Taylor wants to sleep—just sleep—with Noah more than anything, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to assume anything. Not at this point.

  “Sure. Mom has more than one extra bedroom.”

  Taylor stills ever so slightly. “O-okay. Great.” Shit. But still better than staying at the motel.

  Noah laughs and pulls Taylor into a kiss. “Just kidding…I missed you in bed with me.”

  “You ass.” Taylor pushes him away, but he can’t help smiling.

  “You should have seen your face.” Noah chuckles, but then gets serious. “But just sleep though. Like I said, no hanky panky until we talk.”

  “Oh, hey, no.” Taylor holds up his hands and then freezes. He peers at Noah. “Wait—did you just say hanky panky?” he asks and laughs.

  Noah’s lips twitch. “Maybe.”

  “Where’d you even learn that phrase?”

  Noah tries to look peeved, but he can’t quite pull it off. He’s fighting a smirk. With a shrug, he says, “Marisol, my billet mom, used it a lot. It seemed fitting.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “Shut up.”

  “Make me.”

  Noah smacks a kiss against his cheek.

  “Will cuddling be allowed?”

  “You cuddle in your sleep, Taylor. There’s no way to stop that from happening unless I tie you to the bed.”

  “Oooh…kinky. Didn’t know asexuals were into that.” He waggles his eyebrows.

  “Oh my God.”
Noah shoves Taylor this time. “Shut up.”

  They bump shoulders and lurch up the walk, giggling like little girls.

  Noah lets them into the house and they leave the horseplay outside. The house is dark but for a faint light in the kitchen and the small low-level lights running up the wall along the staircase.

  Together, they peek into the nursery and moon over their baby girl for a few moments. But as much as Taylor loves Emma, he’s more interested in sleep right now. He tugs on Noah’s hand and they continue down the hall and into Noah’s room.

  Taylor drops his duffel and hangs his suit jacket over the treadmill in the corner. Noah tosses his on the bed and cups Taylor face. They kiss again, slow and deep, and Taylor’s dick starts to stir. “Mmmnnn…” he says against Noah’s mouth, “don’t start anything.”

  “It was a kiss.”

  “It’s been three weeks since we’ve done anything more than that.”

  “Whose fault is that?”

  “Mine. I know. But you look hot in that shirt—it matches your eyes. And I can barely keep my eyes open.” Taylor strips down to his underwear and crawls into bed. The sheets are cool and smell like something tropical. “C’mon, babe.”

  Noah flips off the light and slides in behind him. His knees tuck up behind Taylor’s and his arms slides around Taylor’s waist. Noah nuzzles his nose into Taylor’s neck.

  “I missed this more than anything, Noah. I love you so much.”

  “I missed this too. Night, Taylor.”

  “Night, Noe…”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Noah’s leg is bouncing again. They’ve been in this ugly, wood-paneled conference room for just over an hour while the mediator, an older woman with a sour face, has asked questions of Brenda, Julia, and himself.

  Ms. Padget sits on one side of him, his mother on the other. Julia, her mother, and Julia’s lawyer sit across the table. Julia’s answered truthfully, much to Noah’s relief and Brenda’s displeased surprise, but he still can’t gauge the mediator’s thoughts.

  Taylor sits quietly in a far corner, caring for Emma, who fussed very little and finally fell asleep in her stroller.

  The faint buzz of the flickering fluorescent light is giving Noah a headache.

  “Ms. Gilbert, Mr. Drinkwater, is Emma Mr. Drinkwater’s biological child?”

  Julia shakes her head. “No, ma’am. The father is a college classmate of mine.”

  “Does he know he’s fathered a child?”

  “He told me to get rid of it and broke it off with me.”

  Ms. Pembroke’s lips pinch together in disapproval.

  “And, Mr. Drinkwater, why is it that you’re so willing to take on Ms. Gilbert’s child?”

  Noah can’t help the smile that overtakes his face. “Ma’am, Julia’s been my best friend since I was twelve and she was nine. And I fell in love with Emma the first moment I laid eyes on her. She was six pounds, three ounces of pure joy wrapped in a soft bear-print blanket. I’ve always wanted a large family, and Emma needs someone right now. I have more than enough income to provide for Emma and for Julia if she needs it.”

  Brenda’s face mottles red at his offer.

  “You’re gone more than you’re home, Mr. Drinkwater. How do you plan to raise a family with a lifestyle like yours?”

  “All due respect, ma’am, it’s a career, not a lifestyle, and I plan to do it like every other hockey player in the league with a family—with a really good support system.”

  Her eyebrow arches, but she nods. The room goes quiet except for the annoying buzz of the light fixture and the faint scratch of the woman’s pen on paper. She applies the rubber stamp in front of her to the ink pad and then the paper. She signs her name with a flourish Noah didn’t think her capable of and closes the file folder in front of her.

  “It is the finding of this hearing that there was no coercion on Mr. Drinkwater’s part in gaining Ms. Gilbert’s agreement to allow him to adopt her daughter, Emma Gilbert. Ms. Gilbert, as a legal adult and legal parent of Emma Elizabeth Gilbert, may waive her parental rights and surrender her daughter to Mr. Drinkwater’s custody and move forward with adoption proceedings.”

  All the breath whooshes from Noah’s lungs. They won…Noah gets to adopt Emma. His mom hugs him, and a moment later, he feels Taylor’s large hand on his shoulder. “Congrats, Dad.”

  Brenda stalks from the room. Noah feels sorta bad for her; he’ll reach out later though. He wants Emma to know both her grandmas. He has fond memories of visiting his own grandparents, and Emma should have as many people as possible in her life to count on and love her.

  “Thank you so much,” Noah says to his attorney, grateful and relieved.

  “It was all you, Noah,” she says. “I was just here to ensure you received a fair hearing. I have the paperwork for Julia to sign, if you think it’s the right time.”

  Noah scans the room for Julia. She’s peering into the stroller, hand on her heart. He can’t read her expression from here.

  “Excuse me,” he murmurs and joins her.

  She looks up at his approach and he sees the tears, but she’s smiling. He envelops her in his arms. “You okay?”

  She nods into his chest. “She’s beautiful, Noah.”

  “You did all the hard work, squirt.”

  They shift so that Noah’s arm is around Julia’s shoulder and they gaze at their daughter. “You’ll always be her mom, Jules. If you ever want to spend time with her, you can. You know that, right?”

  She sniffs and nods.

  “Your mom, too. It was never my intent to exclude her from Emma’s life either.”

  “I know. She’ll come around.”

  “Okay, well…my lawyer has the paperwork. I mean, no pressure, but she has it.”

  “It’s fine, really. I imagine you’re ready to put all this behind you, huh?”

  Understatement. Between the mess with Taylor and then with Emma’s custody, his week has been pretty stressful. But at least it was only a week. “You can’t even know.”

  Emma snuffles in her sleep, but doesn’t wake.

  Noah laces his fingers through Julia’s and kisses the back of her hand as they head back toward his attorney. He meets Ms. Padget’s gaze and nods; she lifts her briefcase to the table and lays out the forms.

  “Are you really okay, Jules?”

  She looks up at him, her eyes clear and a genuine smile on her face. The joyous one he remembers from their childhood. “I really am, Noah. I went to the counseling center at school and they helped me out a lot. Ms. Maple calls every week or so to say hi. I don’t know if I can ever thank you enough.”

  “Hey.” He tugs her into another hug. “I could say the same to you. You’ve given me the most incredible gift. Why don’t we just call it even?” He can never repay her for her implicit trust, and Emma is priceless.

  “Deal.”

  Julia lays a hand on Taylor’s arm as they pass each other. “It’s nice to finally meet you,” she says.

  Taylor pulls her into a hug. “Nice to meet you too.”

  Jules stands up on tiptoe and whispers something in Taylor’s ear. He looks at Noah and then toward Emma, shrugs, and murmurs something back. His eyes are bright and his expression is fond, to say the least.

  “Take care,” Taylor says and returns to Emma in the stroller.

  Julia and Noah step up to the conference table.

  Ms. Padget’s laid out a handful of documents with sticky colored arrows pointing to signature lines. She explains each document and asks Julia if she has any questions before handing her a pen.

  Noah glances at Taylor and gets a wink in return. He grins, warmth blooming in his chest. He’s got a head start on the life he thought he’d struggle harder to have.

  “So you and Taylor, huh?” Julia says, signing the first doc.

  “What? How’d you know, me and Taylor?”

  “No hockey player looks at a baby the way he looks at Emma unless it’s his own or he has a really compelli
ng reason to do so. And few hockey players look at one another the way he looks at you, so I went out on a limb.”

  Noah laughs.

  She nudges his chest with her shoulder. “Didn’t know you leaned that way.”

  “I didn’t either, to be honest. It just happened and it’s good.”

  “Yeah?” She gives him a pointed look, eyebrow arched. She knows he’s asexual. He knows what she’s asking.

  Heat blooms on his cheeks, but he nods. “Yeah.”

  “Good for you, Noah. I’m glad.”

  Julia signs the last document and Ms. Padget tucks them back in her briefcase.

  “I’ll file these Tuesday since Monday’s a holiday. I’ll call you and let you know how long until it’s official.”

  “Thanks again.” Noah shakes hands with Ms. Padget and she heads out.

  “I’m gonna go too, Noah. I love you.”

  “I love you too. Don’t stop calling me, Jules.”

  “I won’t. I promise.” After another long hug—Noah buries his face in her hair and holds her tight—she too leaves.

  Taylor joins Noah and his mom, pushing the stroller.

  Noah gazes down at his daughter. She’s really his now. Her little eyes open, bright blue, like his own. When she sees him, a huge smile breaks out over her face, and he just can’t help but think this was really meant to be.

  End Notes

  Thank you for downloading this e-book. This e-book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This e-book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your vendor of choice and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

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