by TJ Rudolph
When I got home, I awkwardly tried to carry all the shopping bags at once.
“Sorry I can’t help you, Gracy,” Aaron told me and I just had to laugh at the thought of him trying to grab shopping bags.
Before I could get to the building entrance, Chase came jogging toward me with no shoes on his feet. “Hey, let me help you with that.” He took the bags before I could protest.
“Where did you come from?” I asked him cynically. “Hope you weren’t watching and waiting for me to come back.”
He smiled cheekily. “What if I was?” I could see him challenging me with his eyes.
I looked over my shoulder, and to my relief, Aaron was gone. Although he was only a figment of my imagination, I didn’t want him to witness this.
“So,” Chase said as I opened the door for him to walk inside, “are you ready for the party tonight?”
“And what makes you think I am going to your party?”
“Correction,” he said as he put the bags on the counter, “it’s our party.”
I shook my head. “I told you, I am not a partying kind of girl.”
“Then what kind of girl are you, Grace?” he asked as he stepped closer to me.
I swallowed nervously and turned around. “I just want to get through college without any distractions, and just so you know Chase,” I said bravely turning back toward him, “your charm would be better spent on someone else.”
“Grace, you will soon learn that in this life, some distractions are needed,” he whispered in my ear.
And before I could answer, he walked away and closed the door.
I put my hand over my chest and took a deep breath. I could not believe the impudence of this guy. I would seriously have to watch myself around him; he was getting too far under my skin. And from what I heard about Chase Ryder, I knew he would take my heart and rip it to shreds. Besides, the only man I had ever loved died and there would never be anyone who would be able to replace him.
After I stuffed the food in the fridge, I decided to go over to the art studio for a while to paint. I needed something to relax me after my encounter with Chase and I didn’t want him dragging me to the party later. Although it wasn’t a good hide out since he found me there yesterday.
I walked from my building across the lawn to that art studio; it was quiet on campus today, not a student in sight. I wondered where everyone hung out on the weekends; maybe I should ask Chase about that.
I unlocked the room and found my latest piece standing there. I picked it up and put it back on the easel. It looked even gloomier, now that it had dried, and the light was bouncing off it. I took it off again and replaced it with a clean canvas and started painting.
I thought of a place in my hometown that Aaron and I loved to go to. I started off with the ocean; it was where we would go to almost every Saturday afternoon. I added the wooden bridge which was at the far end of the beach. Directly underneath the bridge was a secret spot Aaron and I had found; it was a curved piece of wood which formed a seat. We would climb down there and because of the size of the seat, we would be forced to sit closely together. My skin touching his. We would stay like that for hours as we watched the waves crashing on the shore. Sometimes the waves would get so high it would touch our feet and I would squeal in delight.
After I had painted the background, I thought of painting him and me, the way we used to sit there. But I wanted the truth reflected in the painting and the truth was that I would never sit there with Aaron again. I was suddenly overcome with anger as I threw the paint brush against the wall sobbing.
I didn’t know how long I sat staring at that empty bridge after I wiped away my tears. But when I walked back to my room it had gotten dark and the only light that was shining between my building and the art studio was the moonlight.
I could hear the music as I approached and I quickly walked to my room and locked the door. I didn’t want to chance running into Chase. I made myself a chicken sandwich and I only managed one bite before I went to lie down on my bed. The music was annoyingly loud and I knew that I wouldn’t be able to sleep. I closed my eyes and sighed deeply and when I opened them again, Aaron was next to me. I knew better than to jump off my bed screaming, but my heart fluttered to see him lying there as if he were real. I wanted to reach out to touch him. So, I did. I placed my hand where his cheek might have been and tried to remember the way his rugged skin felt before he shaved it.
“Grace,” he looked at me, his eyes as sad as the day he came over to tell me that his dog Kibbles had been put down. “I can’t stand to see you spending all your time alone. Life dealt you an unfair hand; it did a number on both of us. But you have to get over it sometime.”
A lone tear escaped and trickled down my cheek. The harsh reality of his words hit me hard. Who was I to be so damn selfish? I was not the one who got the shitty deal, not really! I was alive and he wasn’t. I was the one who got to experience everything that he didn’t. Who was I to complain? I just wanted him here with me so badly.
“Grace, get up, put on that pretty white dress of yours and go to that party,” he pleaded.
I nodded, I wanted to do this for him, I owed him that much. I dragged myself off the bed and searched for the white dress he was talking about. It was his favorite. A sleeveless white, A-line dress with a brown belt around the waist. I put on my brown sandals and a shade of pink lipstick. I took my auburn hair out of the bun and ruffled it a bit, pushing my fringe forward.
I looked in the mirror, although I was as thin as a rake as Aaron put it, I still had my curves which I got from my mother. I also inherited her brownish green eyes. The only thing I had really inherited from my dad was the freckles sprinkled on my cheeks.
I took a deep breath as I locked my door to go next door. I walked past a few people standing around in the hallway and stood by the front door which was wide open.
It was only once I was in his apartment that I could make out the song which just sounded like bass coming through my walls. It was Train’s “Hey soul sister.”
I wasn’t sure what I was doing there, I didn’t know anyone. I hardly knew the guy who was throwing the party. I looked around awkwardly for him. I finally spotted him sitting on a gray sofa with two pretty blondes on either one of his legs. When he turned to look at me, I immediately knew this was a huge mistake and quickly turned.
“Grace,” I heard his voice as I reached my door. “Wait!”
“I’m sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking coming tonight, I mean the only person I know is obviously busy with his… extramural activities.”
“Come on, Grace. I’ve been waiting the whole night for you,” he smiled.
“Funny, it didn’t look that way to me.” I frowned. “And I’m suddenly tired,” I said trying hard to show him that his gorgeous smile had absolutely no effect on me.
“Please, just come around for a little while and then I’ll walk you home myself.”
I had to laugh at that.
“Ladies and gentlemen, I just got my first laugh.” He threw his hand in his air like he just won something.
“Don’t get used to it,” I smirked at how crazy he looked. “Fine, I will go to your party for a bit.”
He grabbed my hand and my heart thudded in my chest. This was wrong in every sense of the word and yet my feet kept moving forward.
He pulled me into the room and then stood on the table and announced me like I was the queen.
“Everyone? This is Grace! Grace? This is everyone!”
“You’re insane,” I mouthed to him.
I gave an awkward wave and everyone grumbled a hello.
“Who is this absolutely beautiful woman I see before me?” I heard a voice behind me. I turned around and looked into a pair of dark blue eyes; his blond hair was tied in a ponytail. He was not as muscular as Chase but still buff and his skin was slightly tanned. Chase jumped from the table and stepped in between us.
“Sebastian, this is Grace. Grace, this is my roo
mmate Sebastian,” he rambled.
“You mean this is the Grace that lives next door?” he asked, surprised and his eyes sparkled like I was a shiny diamond.
“Yes, and if you don’t mind, I was showing her around,” Chase said and took my hand again.
“Nice to meet you,” I said as Chase pulled me around the corner.
“You should stay away from him,” he said sternly.
“Excuse me?” I said as I pulled my hand out of his grasp and stepped back. Just what the hell is happening right now? “Since when do you give me orders, I barely even know you!”
“I’m sorry,” he said, “I just… Just be careful around here okay. People are not always who they seem to be.”
‘I’m a big girl, Chase, and I can take care of myself.”
“Very well,” he said. “I’m sorry, would you like to continue our tour?”
“There are two rooms, a bathroom and a tiny living room, with a kitchen behind it. How much of a tour could there be?” I raised my brows.
“There’s always my room you haven’t seen,” he grinned.
“I think I should stay out of there. My room is directly next to yours and it sounds like all whips and chains in there.”
He laughed as he opened the door we were standing next to. “See for yourself.”
I stuck my head in and didn’t try to hide my surprise. The room was very neat, with a window above the bed. The bed had black bedding on it and the walls were bare. Or at least I thought it was until I walked further in. What caught my attention was not the huge speakers hanging on the walls I was facing, or the microphone, but the two guitars that were hanging on either side of the door. “Do you play?” I asked him.
“I dabble,” he smiled mysteriously.
I walked closer to the guitars on the wall and when I realized what it was, I pointed to the one on the left and took my voice up an octave. “Are you serious? Is this a 1950 Stromberg master?” I brushed my fingers over the tanned wood and turned around to look at him.
His mouth was nearly hanging open. “You know what kind of guitar that is?”
“Yes,” I breathed. “This thing must have cost you an arm and a leg. Wait, are you secretly loaded?”
He shifted his feet uncomfortably. “I inherited it from someone,” he said.
“Well then you must have one super rich family,” I said in awe. “How do you not play and you have these bad boys?”
“Do you play?” He cocked his head to the side and lifted a brow.
“I used to, not that much anymore.”
He took the beautiful red fender off a hook and offered it to me. “Why don’t you play something?”
I chucked nervously and shook my head. “It’s been too long, I don’t think I know an A chord from a G,” I lied. There was no way I was going to play for him.
He grinned and put it back. “Maybe one day when you remember,” he said and I realized how close we were standing to one another. I could feel his warm breath on my skin and it made my hair stand on end.
“I think it’s time for me to go,” I said as I looked at my watch. “It’s way past my bedtime.”
“But you just got here?” he creased his forehead.
“Well that’s because I promised a nagging neighbor of mine that I would come and since I dutifully made my appearance I think it’s time for me to be going?”
“But you haven’t seen my party trick yet,” he retorted.
I pursed my lips together, “I’m sure there are women inside who would be more impressed than me.”
“Ouch, I’m wounded,” he placed his hand over his heart.
“I will bring over a band aid next time,” I quipped. It’s been…enlightening being here tonight, thanks for inviting me.”
“You can come around anytime invitation or not,” he said. “Let me walk you home.”
“You mean next door.” I shook my head
He laughed. “I like you, Grace, and I think we’re going to be great friends.”
“Who said we were friends?” I asked him.
“Well, unless you wanted more than friendship…” He gave me a cheeky grin.
“Friendship it is,” I chirped.
He laughed as he walked me to my door, which was literally twenty or so steps away from his apartment door.
“Good night, Chase,” I said as I opened the door.
“What, you’re not going to invite me in?”
“I think your time would be better spent with those two brooding blondes waiting in your room;” I said and closed the door. I leaned against it and took a deep breath.
“By the way,” Chase said on the other side of the door. “No girl besides you has ever been in my room.” I heard his footsteps as he walked away.
I think I might have stopped breathing for a second and then I shook my head. Chase was bad news, I knew this. So why didn’t I stay away from him?
“Grace, how was the party?” That sweet voice I loved to hear broke me out of my thoughts. It was Aaron. I stared at him for a moment before answering, he always looked so real.
“It was okay,” I shrugged.
“I’m glad you went out of this apartment for a bit,” he said.
I walked to the bathroom. “I am going to get dressed, don’t go anywhere. I quickly slipped into my second pair of bunny covered PJ’s and strolled into the living room. I pulled a blanket out of the closet and went to sit next to Aaron on the sofa. A wave of sadness washed over me as we silently watched a movie on TV. It reminded me of all the weekends we would spend doing this, how we sat closely under the covers and him never knowing how much I wanted to kiss him. Or how he used to playfully feed me popcorn, which was a game to him but set the butterflies into motion in my stomach. The only difference was that when I fell asleep this time, instead of falling asleep on his muscular arm, it was the hard shoulder of the couch.
****
It felt like I had just closed my eyes when I heard the door bell ringing. I looked over the sofa at the clock in the kitchen and saw that it was still early. I lifted myself up and groaned because of my aching body. I dragged my feet to the door, with a blue knitted blanket thrown over my shoulders. When I opened the door, Chase was standing in front of me and I noticed he was wearing black and green running gear and holding two cups of coffee in his hand.
“Hey,” he grinned, “I went for a run and thought I should bring my friend a cup of coffee.”
“Sure, friend,” I said as I opened the door wider, “it’s not early at all. Please come in.”
He set the coffee cups on the kitchen table and looked at me while leaning on it. “You and rabbits sure go well together.” He grinned.
I once again forgot about the skimpy shorts and sweater I was wearing. “Be right back,” I said as I ran to the room and put on a robe.
When I came back, he was standing by the window sipping his coffee. I could definitely see what all the fuss was about, not only was he strikingly handsome, every part of his body was muscular. He looked like a cover model straight off a sports magazine. I blinked a few times when I realized I was staring.
He turned to look at me. “So what are you up to today?”
“Haven’t thought about it yet, maybe take a tour of the town.”
