by Amy Bellows
“Todd, you need to loosen up. Or, you know, tell everyone. They’ll keep their hands off if they know he’s yours.”
I shake my head. “We’re waiting for his Pebble Gifting Season.”
Ansel takes a sip of his martini. He doesn’t say anything for a few minutes, but I know he will eventually. There’s no way Ansel isn’t going to respond to something like that.
“So you’re serious about this?” he finally asks.
I shove my hands in my pockets and nod.
“Well, I like him. He’s sweet. Like you.”
I laugh. “I’m not sweet.”
Ansel smiles at me. “Yeah, you are.”
He might be right. When it comes to Lewis, that is. Who is now holding yet another drink. That’s number three. Lewis can’t handle three drinks. That doesn’t stop him from taking a big swallow of it.
Fuck. Why can’t he ever drink slowly?
An alpha named Rich eggs him on to drink the rest and grabs his naked waist. My whole body tenses. I force myself to stay back.
“You’re growling. Just so you know,” Ansel says.
“He’s pawing at my mate. What am I supposed to do?”
After Lewis finishes his drink, more than a dozen people watch in shock as Rich guides Lewis into a dance with him. Rich seems too drunk to care. He’s stumbling around with Lewis in his arms, and Lewis is simply standing there as still as possible, clearly unsure what to do.
Ansel hands me his drink. “Before you go charging over there, let me take a shot at this, okay?”
He’s right. If I go over there, I’m bound to expose my relationship with Lewis. I’m too riled up right now. But watching someone else rescue my omega is hard.
Ansel walks over to Rich and says something in his ear. Rich stiffens, and his hands fly off of Lewis like he’s a hot potato. The second he lets Lewis go, Lewis bolts across the front room. For a moment I wonder if he’s going to throw his arms around me.
He stops right in front of me and murmurs, “Will you take me home?”
Finally. “Yes. Where are your clothes?”
“The bathroom.”
I walk with him back to Ansel’s bathroom. I close the door behind us, not caring what anyone thinks at this point. Lewis’s clothes are neatly folded on the counter. He takes off the nose and headband while I pull the faux fur briefs off. I give his hip a quick kiss before unfolding his jeans and holding them out for him to step into. He’s a little wobbly on his feet, but he manages to get both legs in. The shirt is easier. I zip up his puffy coat, help him into his shoes, and pull his knitted hat on before we brave the crowd again. My shirt and jacket are in a crumpled heap by the door. I put the shirt on backward and don’t bother with the jacket at all.
We need to get out of here. This was never the plan. We came here for him to make friends, not dance with other alphas.
When I grab for the doorknob, I hear a telltale crunch.
Shit. I release the knob, but the damage is done. It’s now dented.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Todd. Get out of here before someone else notices you’re raging,” Ansel says.
Polar bear shifters may not mate for life, but when we have a mate, we’re overprotective. I had hoped to shelter Lewis from that. He doesn’t need to see me turn into the Hulk just because another alpha touched him. But damn it, Lewis is mine.
“Leave! Now!” Ansel hisses at Lewis, opening the damaged door and pushing Lewis out. Lewis scurries down the steps. I follow, hoping he’s running with me instead of from me. Am I scaring him? I’ve never let him see this side of me. Maybe I should have warned him.
He keeps running once he gets to the bottom stair. I stop. If Lewis needs to get away from me, I should respect that, shouldn’t I? I’m not going to chase him down.
Blood pulses through my ears. My whole body wants to go after my omega. Still, I won’t let my anger get the best of me. Lewis wasn’t trying to cheat on me. He was just on the dancefloor. This isn’t his fault.
He stops running and turns back to look at me. “Todd… aren’t you coming?” His body stiffens, and in this moment he seems so vulnerable.
Does he really think I don’t want to come with him?
I run after him, my breath puffing out like a fog in front of me. The chill of the night stings my ears and makes my teeth ache. Lewis runs ahead of me in his huge white coat like a beacon. Somehow, he knows to grab for the back door instead of the front. We’ve never made love anywhere but in the privacy of my apartment, but I need him right now. I unlock the door with the remote, and he climbs inside.
It’s such a crazy risk. At least the windows in the back of my car are tinted, and Lewis’s hat hides his brown hair. I climb in the back with him and slam the door shut behind me. He unzips his enormous coat and shoves it off his shoulders, keeping his hat on. I crash into him and kiss him with a violent hunger I hope doesn’t scare him.
“You’re mine,” I growl.
“Yes. Yours.” He grabs for the button of my jeans. “I need you, Todd. Please.”
This isn’t supposed to happen. When their alpha rages with possessiveness, omega polar bear shifters feel an intense desire to be claimed by their mates. But Lewis isn’t a polar bear shifter. Did Ansel tell him to do this?
“We’re in my car. In public,” I remind him.
Fingers trembling, he unzips my fly and yanks my briefs down. “I know. I’m so sorry. But… I need it. Please.”
The lust in his eyes seems so real. Would Lewis do something so reckless otherwise, even if Ansel told him to?
I pounce on him and forcibly flip him over, pulling at his jeans without bothering to unzip them first. Luckily, they’re stretchy enough they come down. A wet spot already marks his underwear from his slick. I grab them, and a loud tearing sound echoes through the car as I rip them off.
“Oh, fuck, oh yes.” He makes a choked sound when I drive a finger into him. “More. Please.” His begging unhinges me. I don’t even bother to be gentle anymore. I just withdraw and push two fingers in, all the way to the knuckle.
“Ngggg!” Lewis bucks his hips back into my fingers. “C’mon. Give it to me.”
Without any warning, I piston my fingers in and out of him, slamming into that spot inside him that makes him keen. He falls apart underneath me, thrashing and begging. He wails when I pull my fingers out, but groans as I replace them with my cock. I grab his hips and ram into him in one thrust. He throws his head back.
“Fuck me. Fuck me so hard I won’t be able to walk tomorrow.”
I’ve never completely let go with Lewis. I’m not sure if he can take it. But the blood that pulsed through my ears back in Ansel’s house now rushes through my entire body, and there’s something inside of me that needs to. That same something senses Lewis needs it too. What if that’s true?
“You can tell me to stop if it’s too much,” I whisper in his ear.
“Now, Todd.” His voice has a sharp edge to it that makes me smile. He’s starting to get angry with me.
I pull out and slam back in—a little harder this time—to give him a taste of what this is going to be like. I pause to give him a chance to back out, but he turns his head to glare at me. “What are you waiting for?”
He’s right. What am I waiting for? We’re mates. Do I honestly think I can hold back from him forever?
I grab both of his hips, using the grip as leverage to thrust into him hard and deep. This time when I rock out, it’s only to slam back in. I don’t try to ease him into it, don’t even attempt to hold back the raging bear within me. I may be in my human form, but something primal takes over, fucking Lewis brutally into the seat. He claws into the cushion with a high whine that pleases my bear so much, I can’t help but fuck him harder. I’m knotting. I’ve never knotted Lewis before. I don’t even know if I’ll fit.
Lewis calls out, “Yes! Oh, please give it to me,” and backs up, clearly so ready to take it. So I force my knot inside of him and hold him down as I expand. His wall
s feel impossibly tight around me.
“Mmmmm. That’s… Oh, Todd. You’re knotting me.” His voice is quiet—in awe.
“Is that okay?” I ask a little too late.
“Yes.” His back tenses, and his hands scrabble at the car door. “Ugh, you’re so big.”
I just keep getting bigger. Or maybe it only feels that way because he’s clenching me so tight. I know I should be still. I know I should wait. And yet the same force that made me lose control before is taking over. I need to rock my hips. I need to grind my knot into him.
“Can I move?”
He shakes his head. “Too big.”
Fuck, I’m not hurting him, am I? I can’t pull out now. This is why I haven’t knotted him before. What was I thinking? The pressure increases on my knot, and Lewis groans.
“Now. Move now,” he rasps.
Before my mind can react, my hips take over. The thrusts are shorter because of the knot, but they’re still so rough I worry if Lewis is going to be okay. He rocks back into me, giving as good as he gets. And then something in me snaps. I push his chest down and rail into him with no mercy. That heady whine from earlier escapes his lips, and I know instinctively he needs this as much as I do.
I shudder as my orgasm overtakes me. Every muscle in my body tightens, the pleasure pulsing through me like lightning. Lewis lets out a broken moan. We’re coming together. He weathered the rage of my bear, and he’s still here. He’s still whispering, “I love you.”
When I finally come down, I ease us onto our sides and kiss his shoulder. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. But that was wild,” he says.
“Wild as in too much, or wild as in let’s do it again?”
He takes my hand and squeezes it to his chest. “Wild as in let’s do it again when we’re at your place because it’s really cold in here.”
Damn it. In all of the excitement I forgot he runs colder than I do. I grab his coat from where I stuffed it in between the front two seats and lay it over him like a blanket, tucking it around his body.
“Mmmmm. What about you? Are you cold?”
I kiss his cheek. “Mountains don’t get cold.”
He cuddles closer to me. “They might. We don’t know.”
I chuckle. I may freeze my ass off before my knot softens, but I don’t care. Lewis just took my knot, and he’s okay. I completely let go with him, and he’s not scared.
“This mountain is too happy to be cold,” I say.
He turns his head to give me an awkward kiss, and damn if he doesn’t look as happy as I feel. Maybe there are people outside this car who know we had sex, and maybe we have a long way to go before his family or my friends completely accept us, but in this moment, none of that matters.
Lewis and I are tied, and there’s nowhere in the world I’d rather be.
16
Todd
One Year Later…
I run through everything in my head again. Pebble box. Check. Pebble Gifting Portfolio. Check. Ridiculously expensive tuxedo rental that was totally worth it because I look like a white-haired James Bond. Check. One million butterflies in my stomach. Check. A heart so full of love for Lewis that I won’t survive if he turns me down. Check.
We’ve been waiting for this night for years. What if it doesn’t live up to his expectations? What if his father threatens to disown him tomorrow morning if he bonds with me? What if he gets cold feet?
I take in a deep breath and get out of my car. My phone dings. I pull it out to see a text message from Ansel.
Eagerly awaiting your call tomorrow to tell me ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING.
I’ve been getting text messages like that all day. Our romp in the car was less than quiet at Ansel’s party last year, and eventually it got out that Lewis and I were dating. It was less eventful than we anticipated. People were mostly chill about it, with the exception of my mothers. They’re still mad they heard about “my first mate” through the grapevine. They refuse to think of Lewis as my only mate at this point, but I’m willing to give them time. It’s a lot to take in.
Of course, no penguin shifters know yet, including Lewis’s dad. He hasn’t been rude to me in ages. There’s always a chance that he won’t freak out when a polar bear shifter alpha shows up at his door with a pebble box for his son. It’s not likely, but it’s possible.
I enter Lewis’s apartment building and scale up the steps to the second floor.
We agreed ages ago that we couldn’t do this the same way as other penguin shifters. Wandering around the city until we found each other could take ages, and we have to do it the day before Pebble Gifting Season officially begins anyway. As soon as penguin shifters start pairing up, my jewelry shop will be extremely busy. Pebble Gifting Season only happens once a year, and people will expect me to be open. I can’t exactly leave them hanging.
Besides, I enjoy making jewelry for Pebble Gifting Season. It’s very romantic.
The only logical course of action (and logical courses of action are what penguin shifters are all about) was for me to come to him. Even if that means facing the wrath of his father early. His father will be going over my portfolio tomorrow anyway, so I have to face him sooner or later.
I stop outside Lewis’s door. Last weekend Lewis made love to me with a ferocity that scared me a little bit, almost as if he was getting ready to say goodbye. He wouldn’t leave me after all of our time together, would he?
I knock on the door.
Somewhere inside there are footfalls and an “I’ll get it!” from his father’s deep voice.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
The door opens. His father is in his sweats, and clearly not ready for a tuxedo-clad alpha holding a black satin box and a binder. He certainly isn’t ready for that alpha to be me. He considers me silently for a few moments.
“Is, uh, Lewis here?” My voice cracks, even though it hasn’t cracked since I was fourteen years old.
“Young man, do you know what you’re doing? Giving a man a pebble means committing to him for life. I don’t want Lewis to end up like—”
He stops, but I know what he was going to say. He doesn’t want Lewis to end up like him. Lewis’s father grasps his chin and looks up at the ceiling, tears pooling in his eyes. I know I’m the opposite of what he wants for his son. I wish I could convince him of how committed I am to Lewis.
Maybe this is like my mothers. It will simply take time.
Lewis slowly approaches. He’s wearing a tux too, and damn. It fits his slender frame like a glove. As he approaches, he fastens his cufflinks. This tux isn’t a rental. Buying a tux for their sons before Pebble Gifting Season is a tradition for most penguin shifter families. This tuxedo was selected with care by his father to give Lewis the best chance of finding the perfect mate. And now he has to watch his son walk off with me.
“I want to see his portfolio,” Lewis’s dad says.
“Dad, that should happen tomorrow morning—”
“Do you think I’m stupid? I know you’re going to accept his pebble. So let me see if he actually put together a decent portfolio before I let him deflower my son. Unless… Oh, Lewis, you didn’t…”
To his credit, Lewis stands his ground. “Dad, I love Todd. I know that doesn’t mean much to you, but I do. And I trust him.”
His dad holds out a hand for my portfolio, so I give it to him. Isn’t he the reason I compiled it in the first place?
He tears through the pages with shaky fingers. I desperately hope he doesn’t read the section at the end before Lewis gets a chance to. I haven’t discussed it with him yet. Of course, after looking through the table of contents, his dad flips there immediately. His eyes widen when he reads the information I had really hoped to tell Lewis myself.
“Please, sir. Give me a chance to talk to Lewis about that.”
He closes the binder and hands it back to me. I thought he’d be upset, but he’s strangely calm. “We’ll talk about this tomorrow morning if Lewis accepts your pebble. I’ll make breakf
ast. Be here at nine o’clock sharp.”
Lewis’s eyes dart back and forth between me and his father, clearly confused. This isn’t the time or place to explain everything, so I hold out my pebble box to Lewis and recite the line we practiced last weekend. “Will you accept my pebble for the evening so we can better assess our compatibility as mates?”
He takes the box from me. It’s customary for him to examine my pebble before we spend the night together. My stomach clenches as he opens the box.
This is the part that worries me the most. Lewis has been prepared for his father’s rejection. And while he may get cold feet, I know he loves me. Still, penguin shifters are particular about their pebbles. I didn’t spend every weekend over the last few years searching for the perfect pebble on the coast, the way penguin shifter alphas do. I don’t have the beak for it. But I am a jeweler. And while jewels aren’t pebbles in the strictest sense, they are what makes my heart sing.
That’s what Lewis said I should try to find.
Lewis opens the box to reveal the raw, uncut diamond I found at a gem convention six months ago. It has plenty of inclusions and a frosted edge that makes it less valuable. That’s why I chose it. The frosted edge reminds me of ice. Although penguin shifters and polar bear shifters rarely take their animal form, when they do, they venture toward the ice. Maybe we’re different, but we’re drawn to the same thing.
I don’t know if my pebble will impress Lewis. But after nearly a decade of working in the jewelry business, it’s the most stunning rock I’ve ever seen.
Lewis takes the diamond out and holds it against the light. Rainbows reflect against the door and walls of the hallway. I watch his eyes closely, hoping for some kind of clue to his thoughts. He doesn’t say anything for what feels like an eternity.
His eyes find mine, and he finally whispers, “Oh, Todd. It’s perfect. I don’t ever want to stop looking at it.”
I let out a big breath.
Lewis sets the pebble back into the box. “Sorry. We should probably go.”
