Grave Omen (Raina Kirkland Book 3)

by Diana Graves

  “Raina, we must go,” Alistair said with so much gentleness in his voice. It felt good to hear it, but nothing could calm my breathing, my racing heart or my nerves.

  “Fly!” I screamed with my face against his chest and we were off into the night’s sky.

  I truly didn’t give a shit if Mato was there or not. I think, sexually, I would always be attracted to the man, but emotionally, intellectually and in every other way I could think of at that time, I didn’t understand him, not at all.

  The only thing I cared about in that moment was that my baby was healthy and that Damon would be by my side as we brought this new life into the world. She was our miracle baby and she held Adia’s soul within her. I still hadn’t decided if I was going to tell Alistair that last bit. He had no idea what precious cargo he held in his arms as we flew at great speed over the city of Tacoma. I felt guilty keeping it from him and maybe it was a testament to how much I really trusted him, maybe, or maybe I was just afraid that he’d feel he had some claim on her, being the reincarnation of his beloved sister or hated sister, depending on how much anger and resentment he held for all the years she forced murderous madness on him and his people…Oh, the complexity of things.

  BREATHE

  THE SECOND CONTRACTION was a long one and it did not stop until well after we arrived at Bastion Fatal. Alistair set me on my side on a bed in a private room in the clinic and stroked my hair. Gabriel was talking to me but I wasn’t listening. I was staring at Alistair’s face, focusing on his blue eyes as the mind numbing ache finally began to recede.

  “You need to breathe slowly,” I heard Gabriel say calmly, as if it was so easy.

  I wanted to tell him to shut the fuck up. How could he ask me to breathe slowly? That sounded like the dumbest thing anyone could have said to me. Breathe slowly while it felt as though someone was ripping my insides out through my lady parts, yeah, of course, easy peasy lemon squeezy. Ass hole.

  “You’ll be just fine. People hardly ever die giving birth these days,” said one of his nurses as he set down a hospital gown for me to put on.

  I gave him probably the ugliest look I’d ever given anybody in my entire life. To even bring up death at that moment was the worst thing anybody could have done. I was being torn apart from the inside and he was talking about death? If I hadn’t been trying my damnedest to catch my breath right then I’d have cursed him out.

  The moment the comment was made Alistair got in the man’s face, towering over him with a menacing look. “Mind your comments, Christian,” he demanded with all seriousness and then he turned back to me.

  “Thank you,” I said quietly and he smiled and stroked a hand through my hair.

  “You need to put this gown on,” said Gabriel. “We can have a female nurse come in and help you if you like.”

  I shook my head as I tried to get off the bed and out of my dress.

  “Let me help you at least. You’re so stubborn,” Alistair said.

  I grimaced. I didn’t like the idea of needing help, even then. But I had to swallow my pride because I couldn’t even get off the bed, let alone get out of my clothes. “Okay,” I said reluctantly and I held my hand out to him so that he could help me get to my feet.

  He was a gentleman, with goal oriented eyes and careful hands as he unzipped my dress and pulled it over my head. Then he undid my bra’s clasp and slowly slipped the straps off my shoulders. My breasts hit heavily against my chest. I felt too shaky to stand any longer and I leaned over the bed to avoid falling. Alistair guided my panties down my legs and I watched his hands slide down to my feet. I lifted one foot for him and then the other to help him take away my last remaining garment.

  “Can you stand for a moment while I help you into your gown?” Alistair asked, and his voice was so soft and careful that I wanted to tell him that he didn’t have to try so hard but in all reality, it was exactly what I needed.

  “If I can lean on you,” I said. “I don’t have the stability to stand on my own.”

  He nodded and wrapped one large hand around my forearm to pull me into his arms. Resting my naked body against his chest, he held the gown out to me. I put my arms through it and leaned into him even further so that he could tie up the back of it for me. I put my head to the side, resting it on his silent chest, while he did so and saw Gabriel and the nurse, Christian, watching us wordlessly; just watching. The look in their eyes made me look up at Alistair and I had to admit that a strangely intimate moment was happening between us at a terribly odd time. I turned my head away and closed my eyes to try and rid myself of those super weird feelings.

  When I opened my eyes I saw Mato standing in the door way to the hospital room with his hands in his pockets. He must have flown to the Bastion to have gotten there before Damon and my family. How long had he been there watching me writhe in pain, watching Alistair undress me?

  “You came?” I asked quietly, to which his only answer was a single nod of his head.

  Alistair helped me back onto the bed and Gabriel put an IV in my arm.

  “Did you want to give an epidural a try?” Gabriel asked.

  “Try? Is there a chance it won’t work?”

  “It’s an injection directly into the spine, so it will definitely work, but for how long, I can’t tell you. You’re not human, so there is a chance that it won’t be as effective or last very long. We can give you one large dose or several smaller doses through the night. I’ll leave that to the anesthesiologist to decide.”

  “Less pain is always better, no matter how fleeting the relief is,” I said.

  “Then I’ll get the anesthesiologist in here immediately. We need to get it done before the next contraction hits because you need to be perfectly still while they insert the needle into your spine.”

  I cringed at the prospect of a needle being shoved into my spine, but if it meant I didn’t feel any more contractions, they could put a hundred needles into my spine…or so I thought until I saw the size of the needle. It was a freaking fountain pen! That might have been a slight overstatement, but it was pretty fucking big.

  The human anesthesiologist, Karen, was a middle aged, hearty woman with short salt and pepper hair that seemed out of place for her years. She couldn’t have been older than late thirty-something. She had me sit on the bed with my back hunched over. She put a pillow on my lap, which was incredibly uncomfortable by itself, before she swabbed my lower back with yellow/orange antiseptic.

  “I’ve cleaned your back with an antiseptic. I’m going to numb the area first. You’re going to feel a sting. You shouldn’t feel any pain at all when I insert the needle and then the catheter, but if you feel anything it will only be a sharp pinch and or burning sensation. But I’m going to need you to not move and take to slow even breaths, okay?” Karen asked. “I’m going to give you a large bolus amount that should last several hours. The doctor can give you more regional anesthetic through the catheter if you need it.”

  I said, “Okay.” But, what I wanted to say was, ‘I understand your request, but we’ll see what happens when you shove that thing inside me.’ …I didn’t think she’d much appreciate my brand of quirk. She didn’t look like the sort. She looked like the sort of person who took her job and life way too seriously.

  There were only three of us in the room then: me, Karen and Damon. He’d arrived with Katie, Thomas, Everett and Lidia just as Karen came into the room with all her equipment on a metal trolley. Gabriel said I could only have one person in the room with me while I got the epidural, so it was Damon who was holding my hand as the needle entered my spine. A pinch she said, a pinch my ass. What I felt was no pinch. From the feel of it I could have sworn she was slicing a machete up my fucking back and I wanted to scream.

  “Hold still,” she said firmly.

  Damon put a firm hand on my back to keep me in a seated hunched position, because I was trying to get away. I didn’t really want to. The movement was involuntary. It was just my knee-jerk reaction to flee from so much
unbearable pain. Seems logical, but not when there’s a long thick needle stuck between your vertebra, dosing out heavy duty pain killers…

  “Breathe,” she said. I hadn’t realized I wasn’t but when she told me to I found that I couldn’t. There was a rod in my back and the act of breathing had escaped me entirely.

  I felt the sharp pain lessen to a dull aching thing and I relaxed my head on Damon’s shoulder.

  “You don’t look like you’re about to have a baby any time soon,” Karen said as she was putting her equipment away on her little trolley.

  “I have a tilted uterus,” I said still a little out of breath.

  She gave me an unfriendly look that I didn’t understand. “Tilted uteruses are common, but they usually correct themselves some time during the pregnancy due to the weight of the baby.” And, what she said did nothing to explain the unfriendly look on her face.

  With an eyebrow raised I said, “Maybe she’s not very heavy.” Seemed like a ‘duh’ answer. Karen’s cold look grew colder and she left the room on an air of suspicion that left me confused. Some people are so off-putting.

  “How do you feel?” Damon asked.

  I smiled up at him. I was actually feeling a lot better, way better in fact. I felt my eyes going lazy and I leaned into him and nuzzled my face into the curve of his neck.

  “I love you so much,” I said, and I meant it with all my heart. I might have wandering thoughts from time to time, but my heart was his. I could never do anything to hurt him or make him less than proud of me, which was why telling him about Raphael and The Hunt was impossible in that moment. Just the thought of it made me cry.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  I tried to wipe my face but found it hard to locate. Yup, I was drugged. I laughed at myself. My brain was all a jumble and my legs were completely numb stumps.

  Damon smiled and guided me back down on my side on the bed. “Would you like to hear the choices in names that I’ve come up with?” he asked.

  “Oh, yes.”

  “It’s after midnight. Do you know what today is?” I shook my head, no. He let out a soft sigh. “And you call yourself a witch. Today is Samhain, the Fall Sabbath, the day when the veil between the netherworld and ours is thinnest, or so you silly pagans believe. I thought, since you worship the goddess of the Celts and our daughter is going to be born today of all days, the Crone aspect of the goddess seemed fitting. It is her festival after all. Crone Kirkland.”

  I laughed out loud then. “Crone? You want to name our daughter Crone? No, no, no,” I laughed. “What are the other choices?”

  “Well, I just have one other idea. It was my mother’s name, but she died hundreds of years ago,” he said with a strangely guarded voice. That alone let me know that it was important to him and I knew before he told me that I’d agree to it. “Isobel.”

  I smiled. “That’s a beautiful name.”

  “What is?” asked Everett as he came in behind the good doctor. Gabriel had a warm blanket in his hands. He draped it over me and the warmth really hit the spot. If I was comfortable before in my drug induced state, it was nothing compared to how cozy I felt then.

  Lazily, I watched my family walk into the room, filling it to the brim: Katie, Thomas, Lidia, Fauna, Seth and Michael. Mom came in after my aunts Marge, Linn and Ell. Even judgmental Great Aunts, Maggie and Bethany were there. It was a full room indeed after Mato closed the door behind him and Alistair. No Tristan or Nick, pity. Not that Nick could show his face even if he wanted to, and I was pretty sure Tristan just didn’t give a shit about me at all anymore. Sadness. What was sadder still was that only a handful of the people in the room had ever shown me real loyalty and unconditional love.

  I’m sure I looked a mess: drugged, half naked, sweaty as all get out. The thought of being embarrassed and angry that everyone was watching me, making me into some kind of sideshow, did enter my mind, but I just couldn’t be mad at that moment. Anger was beyond me.

  “Isobel Barguest?” I asked Damon.

  “No, I think a proper last name is better, not some government issued surname,” he said as he laid a gentle kiss on my knuckles. I didn’t remember him taking my hand. I was so out of it.

  “And, you aren’t even married,” Aunt Bethany said with a smile, though it was obvious that her words were meant to hurt. They didn’t. I tried to let the ‘fuck you’ comment that was firm in my mind show on my face, but I couldn’t quite manage it. All she got was a lethargic smile. That seemed to annoy her enough.

  “Isobel Kirkland, then,” I said. “Isobel Fauna Kirkland.” Fauna made an ‘awe’ sound that made me smile at her.

  Gabriel leaned in to wipe my face with a wet rag. He showed me a padded little clip with a wire coming from it. “I’m going to put this heart monitor on your finger to keep tabs on your heart rate. It’s okay if you fall asleep.”

  “Sleep? Weird,” was all I said, but I did feel sleepy.

  “You’re six centimeters dilated. We want to wait until you’re at least eight centimeters until you start pushing. I’ll come periodically to take a look, okay?”

  “Okay, but what if I take too long and daytime comes?”

  He smirked, “We’re underground. You know that. I’ll stay up for as long as you need me.” And with that he left the room.

  Everyone else stayed and talked for a time, but they came and went over the course of the night, or early morning hours, rather. At one moment for a short time it was just me and my mom. The others had gone to Bastion Fatal’s cafeteria to get something to eat. I couldn’t eat. Until the baby was out I was on a steady diet of ice chips. Yum!

  It didn’t occur to me until I was watching my mom play on her cell phone that her wedding was in a matter of hours and here she was, not getting her beauty sleep.

  “I’m sorry I’m probably going to miss your wedding, Mom. And you’re going to be so tired,” I said.

  She looked up from her phone with a deep frown. “It’s been cancelled.”

  Crap! “Oh, Mom, I’m so sorry. You planned for it to be on Samhain, didn’t you? And in our temple. Is it all pushed to tomorrow?” I asked.

  “Honestly, I don’t know. We’ll know more later on today. As of right now, it’s just cancelled altogether, but don’t worry about it,” she said, though the look of despair on her face said that I should, and if I could concentrate better I would, but I couldn’t.

  It was clear that she didn’t want to talk about it anymore, but I did and I might have said something stupid too, if a human female nurse hadn’t come in.

  “Hello?” she said in the door way. “I’m here to show you how to breast feed. Is now a good time?”

  “Yeah,” I said. “It’s fine.”

  “Good. My name is Olive,” she said as she approached the bed and I shook her hand, secretly hoping that she wouldn’t need to touch my breasts with those cold hard clamps she called hands. Yikes! The thought made me laugh to myself, though. I’d been laughing at my personal thoughts all night long. I must have looked so foolish to everyone that was there, but I didn’t give a damn and that was the beauty of it.

  “As soon as you give birth you’ll need to feed the baby, so I’m going to give you a quick and dirty crash course on breastfeeding,” Olive said.

  Mom stood from her chair and said, “I think I’ll get some coffee while you’re busy.”

  After she closed the door behind her Olive helped me wiggle out of my hospital gown, baring my breasts, and we spent a good fifteen minutes practicing baby holding techniques with a doll she brought and manhandling my nipples to make sure I knew how to help the baby get proper suction power. Cold hands, no!

  LOOPY

  I DID ACTUALLY manage to fall asleep while waiting for Isobel to come out and play. What woke me were Gabriel’s cold gloved hands holding my ankles as he spread my legs open. Feeling his cold hands should have been the first hint that the epidural was wearing off, but I didn’t catch it. He smiled down on me from in-between my legs.<
br />
  “You’re close. I’m going to give you ten minutes more and then it will be crunch time. Okay?”

  “Yeah, cool,” I said wiping the sleep from my eyes. I looked around the room and found Damon, Alistair and Mato sitting quietly opposite the bed. Mato was reading a book (I couldn’t see the title from the position I was lying in), Damon was sleeping with his head on Alistair’s shoulder and Alistair was looking at me with a grin. Gabriel left and I turned to the three men.

  “How long was I out?” I asked.

  “You were sleeping when we came back from the cafeteria around three in the morning, and it is seven now, so at least four hours,” said Alistair.

  “Where is everyone?”

  “Most have gone home. They said they would come back once the baby is born,” said Mato as he put his book in the pocket of his trench coat. “I think they thought it would be quick, as in the movies. Giving birth takes time, sometimes less, sometimes more.”

  “I’m just glad I can’t feel the pain of the contractions. I’d have gone mad by now,” I said.

  “I’ve witnessed many women give birth without them and it’s not easy to watch. I can’t imagine how it must feel,” said Alistair.

  “I got a small taste of it and no, better to die…You know, I love you three so much,” I said, still feeling a tad loopy apparently.

  Alistair looked at the sleeping father to be lying against him and Mato leaned forward in his seat.

  “Even me. I was pretty sure you hate me,” he said.

  “I do, I hate you about as much as I love you,” I giggled. I really was out of it because giggling was not my thing, admitting that I still had feelings for Mato was way so not my thing, but I couldn’t stop myself. I had an undeniable impulse to tell them exactly how I felt, no matter how much I hated it even while I was saying it. Fucking drugs. Talk about love and hate in equal amounts.