Altered Reality

by Eliza Green

  Laura smiled.

  ‘Where are you?’ Jenny asked.

  ‘In Dublin, before we moved to Sydney. The sun still shone back then.’

  Bill started to pay attention again.

  ‘What are you doing?’ Jenny asked.

  ‘My dad and I are taking a walk. He’s holding my hand so I don’t blow away.’ Laura laughed gently.

  ‘How does it make you feel?’

  ‘Excited, exhilarated, I guess. I loved it when it was just the two of us. He gave me a strength my mother never could.’ Laura slowly let go of the tension she’d been holding onto since she’d arrived on the ship and her shoulders dropped.

  Jenny nodded as if she understood. ‘Keep taking deep breaths and grab hold of the memory of how you felt with your father. Control your feelings, don’t let them control you. ’

  Laura’s breathing had become more shallow and even. Bill smiled; he couldn’t help but be impressed by how quickly Jenny had calmed her down.

  After a few minutes of silence, Jenny said. ‘Now, you’re going to come back to the present, slowly and gently. Become aware of the sounds around you … and when you’re ready open your eyes.’

  After a few moments Laura opened her eyes and looked at Jenny.

  ‘How do you feel?’ Jenny asked.

  ‘Better, I think,’ Laura said, sounding more like her old self.

  ‘It’s only temporary,’ Jenny warned. ‘The effects will wear off. But when you feel rough again, I want you to practise that technique and find your inner calm. Do you think you can do that?’

  ‘I think so. Thanks. And I’m sorry’—she looked from Jenny to Bill—‘I wish I could help it—you know, the mood swings.’

  ‘No worries,’ Jenny said. ‘Just hold on to that inner calm when you feel low and you’ll be all right. You know, you’re stronger than you give yourself credit for. Bill told me what happened with Harvey Buchanan. Why did you do it?’

  ‘I didn’t really think about it.’ Laura shrugged. ‘One minute I saw the scalpel in his hand, and the next I was holding it up to his neck. I just did what I needed to.’

  ‘Exactly! Now you get it,’ Jenny said.

  Just as Laura closed her eyes and smiled, Bill leaned towards Jenny. ‘Where did you learn that?’

  ‘I’m not just a pilot, you know. It’s how I survived the madness of living with an addict—my ex-husband—and a difficult daughter.’

  Bill pursed his lips.

  ‘What?’ asked Jenny.

  ‘What will you say to Stephen when you see him again?’

  She shrugged lightly. ‘I don’t know. Maybe I’ll ask him for forgiveness. I should have recognised a man in need of help.’

  ‘But you did help him,’ he said softly. ‘He found me and Laura because of what you did.’

  Laura still had her eyes closed. Jenny smiled. ‘I guess. But it’s not enough, not when I wonder every day if he is safe, or if my actions made things worse for him.’

  Laura opened her eyes. ‘Trust me, he would have been worse off if he’d been caught.’

  Jenny nodded solemnly.

  Chapter 26

  Stephen refused to leave Anton’s side, even though he knew Leon desperately wanted alone time with his son. He could hardly believe it was Anton standing in front of him. All his previous fears about his friend had melted away, and the visions and the pain were gone. He had embraced his new gift of being able to observe the Indigenes’ feelings in strands of colours. He knew now that Elise had been right: the pain and confusion had been a warning that change was imminent. He just hadn’t understood it at the time. For the first time since meeting the human child, Ben Watson, Stephen felt calm.

  He crossed the vast open space of the south quadrant meeting area, where Anton had been found wandering just a few days before. Arianna was there, huddled with a group of females. They were laughing at something. Bright colours danced around them, shades of yellow, pink and green. He remembered the conversation he’d had with Arianna about some of the Indigenes wanting to seek revenge for Anton’s capture. He hoped those feelings had been quashed now that Anton had returned.

  As he got closer to Arianna, he could see that a dark colour was spoiling the brightness around her. Her smile contrasted starkly with her sombre aura. Stephen didn’t understand why she continued to keep her distance from him. Perhaps she was hurt by his earlier behaviour. He’d already apologised to Elise and maybe Arianna deserved the same respect. When he was sure that Anton was out of danger, he would make it up to her.

  Elise’s theory about evolution now made sense to him, but what puzzled him was that seeing colours—seeing Indigenes’ moods and feelings—was nothing special. How was that going to help them survive in the face of a threat? He’d always been able to connect telepathically with his fellow Indigenes. Being able to visualise their feelings in colours just seemed like a natural extension of the abilities he already had. It certainly wasn’t a life-altering change.

  Stephen headed for the Council Chambers where he’d arranged to meet Anton. Pierre had given up his private space so Anton could reconnect with friends and family without interference from the rest of the district. Leon had spent the morning with Anton, and now it was Stephen’s turn.

  Anton was waiting for him inside the Chambers, and when Stephen came in they stood perfectly still in the middle of the room and looked at each other. Stephen half-expected Anton to disappear like his visions had—he couldn’t quite believe the real thing was standing in front of him.

  ‘I saw what they did to you,’ Stephen eventually said.

  ‘I don’t remember any of that,’ said Anton shrugging. On Pierre’s shelf was a mix of leather-bound books about Indigene life and some human books too. On the wall to the left of the bookshelf was a flat screen that stored hundreds of documents about human history downloaded from New London’s digital library. Ignoring the screen, Anton pulled a book off Pierre’s bookshelf and opened it.

  ‘Do you know how long we’ve been looking for you—how long you’ve been away?’

  ‘Yes, Leon told me.’ Anton glanced down at the book as he flicked casually through its pages.

  ‘I’m sorry for leaving you behind on Earth.’

  ‘I don’t remember that,’ Anton said without looking up.

  ‘When I came home, I started having visions—or dreams—about you. You were in some room. I felt everything that they did to you.

  ‘I don’t remember anything,’ Anton said with a half-smile. His eyes never left the book.

  ‘But you were communicating with me. I’m sure of it.’

  Frowning, Anton finally looked up. Stephen decided not to elaborate. It was probably better that Anton didn’t remember anything.

  ‘As you can see, they’ve left me intact,’ Anton said, sweeping a hand the length of his body. ‘I’m no worse for my journey. No need to worry, old friend.’

  The phrase ‘old friend’ caught Stephen’s attention—Anton had never used it before. It was old fashioned, something Pierre was more likely to say. Inside the Council Chambers, which were carved out of omicron, Stephen knew that Anton’s aura would be muted, but he could still make out the same muddy colours—dark purples, murky greens, dull greys—that had surrounded him when he first arrived back. Even after a few days, the colours had still not brightened to reflect his joy at being home again.

  ‘How are you feeling, Anton?’ Stephen felt compelled to ask.

  Anton smirked. ‘I feel fine. Why do you ask, old friend?’

  ‘No, I mean what are you feeling at this very moment? Explain to me your current mood. Be specific.’

  Anton shook his head and frowned. ‘I feel … nothing.’ He caught the look on Stephen’s face and added, ‘Nothing of significance that is.’

  Stephen wasn’t sure what to say next. He found their conversation awkward. ‘Maybe we should leave our chat for another day,’ he suggested. ‘You look tired.’

  ‘Yes, I am feeling a little tired now that y
ou mention it.’

  Stephen walked Anton back to his private dwelling. As they moved further away from the omicron, what little colour there was in Anton’s aura drained away altogether. Stephen was worried. Anton was too calm and in control for someone with such a dark emotional spectrum.

  As they walked, Stephen tried to study Anton’s aura in more detail. Stephen had only been using his new gift for a few days; perhaps he wasn’t very good at ‘reading’ the auras yet. But as they walked on, he caught flickers of brighter colours trying to break through; each time they appeared, though, the murky green fog held them at bay. Stephen gasped.

  ‘Is something bothering you, old friend?’ Anton asked.

  ‘No, not at all.’ Stephen tried to smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes.

  When he took his leave of Anton, Stephen went for a walk to clear his mind. What had happened to Anton? Was it a result of the experiments the humans had carried out on him? The longer he walked the more his mind opened to new thoughts. Elise had been acting strangely since Anton’s return; she hadn’t welcomed him the way Pierre and Leon had. Stephen had tried not to read too much into Elise’s reaction to Anton, but he couldn’t help noticing her colours when she was around him. Usually surrounded by calming shades of blue, Elise’s aura rapidly turned crimson with flashes of yellow as soon as Anton appeared in the vicinity.

  Elise had been keeping her distance from Stephen too—he didn’t blame her; he’d been so horrible to her before—but now he needed her more than ever. He had questions, questions that only she could help him find answers to: how did Anton escape and return to Exilon 5? If the humans had willingly let him go, why?

  Elise could now see clearly what she hadn’t been able to see before: Anton’s neural pathways had been altered and there was scarring on his hippocampus, the area of the brain that stored memories. She wondered how much—if any—of the real Anton was still inside. Then there was the voice that called out to her from far away when she tried to delve deeper into Anton’s mind. Each time she tried to communicate with the voice a dark mass enveloped her and prevented her from connecting.

  At the same time that Anton had arrived home, a new female—she called herself Serena—appeared out of nowhere. Only Anton seemed to know who she was. Elise couldn’t remember having met her before; neither could Pierre. When she looked inside Serena’s mind, she was overwhelmed by the female’s compassion and understanding and she was strongly drawn to her—when she was around her, nothing else seemed to matter. But there was one crucial thing that prevented Elise from welcoming her with open arms: Serena believed herself to be an Indigene; Elise could see that she was not.

  Chapter 27

  Mid September 2163, Exilon 5

  The passenger ship arrived at Exilon 5 and hovered out in space for ten minutes while the spacecrafts shuttled passengers from the ship to the various docking stations on the planet. Bill and Laura stepped out of the spacecraft into the docking station at New London where they joined the queue for security. Jenny followed behind and flashed her pilot’s badge at the attendant. He motioned her to one side. She spoke to him rapidly, then signed something. Bill and Laura pressed on. As their thumbs were scanned, each alter ego flashed up on screen. No alarm bells sounded; they received no funny looks; the replicas worked exactly as Bill had hoped they would. Jenny rejoined them and they stayed inside the docking station walls until the other passengers had left the station. Through the tinted exit doors, Bill could see people waiting to board land vehicles for their various destinations.

  ‘What were you doing back there?’ Bill asked Jenny.

  ‘Placing my space craft into temporary storage,’ she replied.

  Laura’s agitation increased. She tried to keep it under control by wringing her hands. ‘Where to now?’ she asked.

  ‘We’re going to find Stephen,’ Bill said.

  ‘Out there?’ She pointed towards the dark doors that connected the station to the outside world.

  ‘Yes.’

  Tears began to form in her eyes as she smiled. ‘It’s not exactly as you described it, Bill.’

  Bill grabbed hold of her arm and gently urged her forward. ‘I promise you it is. Just wait until you get outside and you can see for yourself.’

  But Laura peeled his hand away. ‘I’ll follow you in a minute. My emotions feel a lot out of control right now,’ she said and tears began to stream down her face.

  He grabbed Laura by the shoulders. She looked up at him with bloodshot eyes. ‘Laura, it’s time to let someone in,’ he said. ‘You’re so busy protecting others that you forget about yourself. I need you to have a little faith that I can help you.’

  Laura dropped her gaze to the floor. Her hair fell into her face.

  He put a finger under her chin and lifted her face towards him, then tucked some of her hair behind her ears.

  Laura took a deep breath and wiped away the tears on her face. ‘Okay, let’s go,’ she whispered, following behind Bill and Jenny as they made their way towards the exit.

  Bill was the first to step out, followed closely by Jenny and Laura. Eyes closed, he turned his face up to the bright light, took a deep breath and stood still, enjoying the rush of warm air for a moment. How could he have forgotten this? But it wasn’t long before he found himself shielding his eyes with his hand. He removed three pairs of eye shields from his bag.

  ‘Here, put these on. Your eyes will need time to get used to the light,’ he explained, handing them each a pair.

  Eye shields on, Bill and Jenny kept a close eye on Laura, not sure how she would react. At first, Laura just stood there in the full glare of the sun. Then new tears began to run down her cheeks.

  ‘Put the shades on,’ Jenny said. ‘It’s the bright light.’ She went over and helped Laura slip the shades on. ‘There. Is that better?’ she asked smiling.

  ‘We need to get moving,’ Bill said.

  But Laura just stood there with the shades on, her face tilted to the sky. Then she fell to her knees. Bill watched as Jenny tried to help Laura to her feet; she seemed to have turned to jelly.

  ‘Give me a hand, Bill,’ Jenny said.

  Bill thought about carrying Laura to the automated transport—she was attracting too much attention and they needed to get away—but he imagined how she would react if he tried that.

  ‘Come on. Lean on me,’ Bill said gently, pulling her to her feet. ‘Not too far to go.’

  Together they managed a few steps, then Laura’s legs went from under her again.

  ‘Leave me for a minute,’ she begged.

  Jenny and Bill stepped back; a few lingering passengers turned to watch.

  ‘What are you looking at?’ Bill snapped at them. The last thing they needed was onlookers. ‘Haven’t you ever seen a woman faint before?’ He took a step towards one individual. ‘Yeah, I’m talking to you. Now, get out of here before I beat the crap out of you.’

  The people reluctantly moved away and Laura covered her face with her hands. Her shoulders shook uncontrollably. The commotion attracted an officer’s attention.

  ‘What’s going on here?’ he asked.

  Bill tried to hide his face. It had been a mistake to confront the others. He should have just let them stare. Jenny stepped in.

  ‘She suffers from Seasonal Affective Disorder,’ she explained. ‘She needs a moment to get used to the weather here.’

  The officer nodded in Bill’s direction. ‘Is he giving you trouble?’

  Jenny smiled. ‘Not at all, officer. She’s his sister. He’s just upset that people are staring at her.’

  The officer nodded curtly and walked off.

  Jenny turned to face Bill, the smile instantly disappearing. ‘Another outburst like that and I’ll arrest you myself. Do you hear me?’

  Bill wasn’t used to being spoken to like that and it took him aback. Before he had time to object, the sound of loud sobbing drew his attention back to Laura, still on the ground.

  ‘Laura, what can I do?’
he pleaded.

  ‘She just needs a minute,’ Jenny said calmly. She placed a hand on Laura’s shoulder. ‘Are you okay?’ she asked her.

  ‘We don’t have a minute,’ Bill said in a loud whisper. ‘The transport will be leaving soon.’

  But all Laura could do was cry.

  He hunched down beside her, took a deep breath and spoke softly to her. ‘You’ve helped me so many times over the past few months, I’ve lost count.’ He felt a lump rise in his throat. ‘I never told you this, but having you around has helped me to forget a few things. Please tell me how I can help, and I will.’

  After a moment, Laura dropped her hands to her side and looked up at him. ‘I’m not crying because I’m sad, you idiot. These are tears of joy.’ Then she started to laugh. Her usually pale face was already taking on a healthy glow. ‘I never thought I’d feel the sun on my face again,’ she said.

  Bill was relieved as he and Jenny helped Laura to her feet again, a grin on her face and tears streaming down her cheeks. She walked confidently to the automated transport, where she turned and said quietly to Bill, ‘Thank you.’

  He frowned. ‘For what? I didn’t do anything.’

  ‘For offering to help,’ Laura said.

  Bill smiled at her. ‘Isn’t that what friends do?’

  While they waited to board the New London-bound automated transport, Bill discreetly removed the communication stone from his pocket. It was emitting a faint blue glow.

  ‘At last,’ he muttered.

  Stephen and Anton bumped into each other in one of the western tunnels. The low light that ran along the base of the tunnel made long ominous shadows of them on the wall.

  ‘Are you sure you don’t remember anything at all?’ Stephen asked.

  ‘I’ve already told you I don’t. Why do you keep asking me?’Anton said frowning.

  ‘It’s just that you look—’

  ‘I’m the same person you left behind,’ Anton assured him.