Choice of Submissions

by Terri Pray

“But you do. I know how you whimpered. I tasted the need from your lips. You pressed against me. You gave yourself into the kiss. You wanted more. You returned to your room and did something about the heat in your body, that much I am certain of. Just what you did, that part I don't know but the heat did not go unanswered.”

  Heat rushed through her body, coloring her cheeks. “You— oh go spend time with a slave!”

  “No, I find you far more interesting than these common slaves they keep here. You know exactly what I enjoy. You remember how it was, what it felt like to be at my feet, don't you? How you whimpered, and crawled, how you pleaded for my touch. Remember all of that, the desire that coated your inner walls, the pleasure you felt. How you needed me... ”

  Her body tingled at his words. Her nipples crinkled into points that pressed against her dress. No. Don't react to this! Her body didn't listen. It hungered for him. It needed him. Her inner walls rippled. Heat coating them.

  “Yes, that's it. Remember.” He whispered.

  “Leave me alone, Davien.” She wanted to sound strong. It didn't work. “I— I don't want you. I don't need you.”

  “Lying to yourself won't help you long term, Celeste.” He took a single step toward her. “Give into it. You know you want to. It's a need in you. One I built with each moment we were together.”

  “You built it so well that I ran from you the first chance I had. Ah, yes. I see you tried to forget that detail.” She tried not to snap and failed.

  “Fear got the better of you. You let it control you instead of trusting me.”

  “I've never trusted you!”

  “Another lie, sweet Celeste?” He murmured, arching one eyebrow. “Not wise. You forget how well I know you.”

  She blanched. “You know what you trained me for, not who I am at the core.”

  “No, I know you. Every inch of you. Every dream and fear. I molded you into the woman you are now. You just need to accept it. Don't fight who you are. Who you need to be.”

  No. I'm not like that anymore! I'm stronger than that.

  “You know it. Deep within you know it, that's why you obeyed me, and didn't leave.” He took another step closer. “I can see the need in you, Celeste. I can taste it on the air. Would it be so bad to touch me again? The kiss felt good, you know that. You remember every moment of delight.”

  “And pain.” She wanted to move. The sane part of her mind screamed at her to move away from him, but she couldn't. Her legs locked. Her heart pounded against her chest. She didn't want to shut down what she was feeling but there was no way around it.

  “Yes, and you came to crave the pain in some ways.”

  Deny it! She couldn't. She wanted to, but it was impossible. Her throat closed every time she opened her mouth to protest.

  “You can't say what you want to because you know it would be wrong. A lie. I know you better than you think.” Davien growled softly, closing the gap between them. “I know you. I know every part of you. Your thoughts. Your dreams. Your hidden desires.”

  She growled, her hands tightening into fists at her sides. She should have turned and run when she had the chance. And do what? Spend the rest of my life running? “I'm going back to my room, Davien.”

  “Not yet.” He brushed his fingers lightly over her cheek.

  Celeste shivered. It would have been so very easy to lean into his touch and let herself soften. Her skin tightened. Her body heated. Her lips parted without thinking, a soft arch pushing through her body as she half rose onto her toes. So easy, it would have been so very easy to give herself to him, if only for one kiss.

  He leaned in, his breath caressing her lips, teasing them apart a little further. “You want me.”

  Celeste whimpered.

  “You need me.”

  Heat flushed through her cheeks.

  “All you have to do is say it and we can explore this bond between us once more.”

  “No!” She pulled back quickly, stumbling three steps away from him. Her legs threatening to give out. “Don't do this to me.”

  “You're doing this to yourself.” He paced forward, giving her no room to escape. “You know that. All you have to do is be honest about it. Such an easy thing after living a lie since you ran from me.”

  “I haven't been living a lie.” She snapped, anger fueling her ability to move away from him.

  “This act of not needing a strong hand, as if you are dominant... ”

  “I am dominant. I was one on the ship coming here and have been dominant since arriving.” Not entirely true...

  “An act.” He smiled. “We both know that. You crave a strong hand. Your body aches for it.”

  Her nipples throbbed in answer and pressed against her dress. “I have the chance of a life here.”

  “But what sort of life would it be if you are fighting your nature at all turns?” His voice urged her to stay put. “You want to kneel. You need my hand in your hair.”

  She swallowed hard. The images his words brought to life tantalized her. “I enjoy dominating others.”

  “Not as much as you crave submission.”

  “I don't crave it!” But I do, god, I do. “Leave me in peace, please, Davien. I want to be able to explore this other side of me without looking over my shoulder every other minute to see if you, or Tearlach are there, trying to pull me to my knees.”

  Davien locked his gaze with hers, cupping her chin in one hand, his voice gentle, but the steel behind his words something she couldn't deny, or ignore. “And if I let you explore that other side of you, whilst still feeding the submission within you, what then?”

  Would he do that? It was a chance she was almost tempted to take. No, don't give in, don't give up the control. “It's not going to work, Davien.”

  “You're tempted.”

  “In some ways.” Why tell him that, why give him that power over me? Because he already knew and there was no point in pretending otherwise. He wasn't a fool. “But I don't trust you to follow through with that, and I have no desire to rush head first into anything with you, or any other man on this island.”

  Davien nodded, his smile fading slightly. “I see.”

  “No, I don't think you do.” Her confidence returned slowly as she saw him falter. “I enjoy being free. Why would I give it up?”

  “Because you need to.”

  “I do not want to.” She wasn't going to back down, no matter how deeply a part of her wanted to now drop to her knees. “I intend to explore this side of my nature fully, Davien. I won't turn my back on it to become a whimpering little thing at your feet again.”

  His smile chilled her to the core. “Why not, when you whimper so nicely?”

  * * * *

  “Determined, isn't he?” Steven walked out onto the fortress walls as Celeste stood there, looking out over the bright blue ocean. “Do you think he'll ever give up?”

  “No, it's not in his nature to give up.”

  “And Tearlach?”

  “That one I don't know so well.” Celeste pressed her fingers against her temples and took a deep breath. “He might give up, he might not.” After the way she had run from him and now embarrassed him in the hall, she doubted he would back down. Not after this.

  “You struck him, in public, I know I couldn't back down from that.”

  “Few men could.”

  “True.”

  Neither of them spoke for a long time after that. She couldn't have called it a comfortable silence, but neither did she find it a burden. Just what she would do now, how she would deal with the situation, she didn't know. The idea of playing the men against each other no longer seemed to be the answer.

  They'd fight it. They'd turn on her. It might even result in her being thrown off the Island for causing trouble. No. Whatever she did she had to be very careful now. If she let herself be the center of trouble then she would deserve everything that happened to her. Instead the only choice appeared to be the one where she followed the rules of the island and tried to find so
me measure of peace for herself.

  Difficult? Yes. Impossible? No.

  Celeste leaned against the walls and closed her eyes, sinking into the pleasure offered by the salt heavy breeze. Why was she even trying to stay here? Because here she did, at least, have a chance to explore and enjoy her life?

  If she could just keep her head and prevent her heart from twisting into a dozen pieces with the pressure they kept putting on her. She had the strength to keep herself focused, she just had to decide exactly what she wanted, or needed, to do.

  The problem was that changed whenever she was alone with Davien.

  She could tell herself one thing, then he would walk into her life and change her viewpoint with a few words, or a single touch. How could she let him do that to her? He didn't have the right to turn her world upside down.

  So why was she letting him do this to her?

  Letting him... oh god, I have the power to stop this. So why am I just letting him run all over me?

  “You look lost in thought.” Steven reached out and touched her shoulder.

  “It's nothing.” She stepped away from his touch. “Just sorting out a few things in my mind.”

  “It's more than that. You don't need to hide from me, Celeste.”

  His voice made her skin crawl. There was nothing appealing about Steven. He wasn't the type of man who could make her submit, or even want to be around him, yet he still thought he had a say in her life. “Steven, why do you expect me to talk to you and trust you?”

  “Why not?”

  “Try because I don't know you as anything other than another man trying to get me to submit to him.” She turned back to look at him and folded her arms beneath her breasts. “You don't want to know because you care for me, or you're my friend, you want to know because you wish to try and use that information for your benefit.”

  “I'm not like that.”

  “Yes, you are. You can't even admit it to yourself.” Don't growl. He's not worth it. “I'm a woman, not a fool, Steven. I'm well aware what you want and that you will do everything you can to try and put me to my knees at your feet. You've made it clear since the first day I walked onto the Island that you wanted to do that to me.”

  “True.” He gave a slight shrug. “But you can't blame me. You're a beautiful young woman, Celeste. And you do have a strong submissive streak.”

  “I have a strong dominant streak, but I don't see you trying to kneel to me.”

  “It's not in my nature to do so.” He looked away from her. “If you knew me you'd accept that.”

  “I don't know you, though. So don't expect me to tell you intimate details about my life, or what I'm thinking, or feeling. It's not going to happen.” Men, she'd never fully understand them, not if she lived to be a hundred. Some, the rare ones, listened and tried to learn more about women, but the only one she knew about was the very same man who triggered that need to submit, kneel, crawl and whimper in her.

  Is that what the magic formula is? Could it be that simple? He knew her. He understood what she wanted? What she needed?

  No, there has to be more to it than that.

  Except there wasn't.

  She had been with him long enough to be molded by him in many respects. He could read her body language. He knew how the emotions bubbled beneath the mask of ice she wore, or tried to wear, around him. She couldn't hide anything from him because she had no clue how to.

  “You'll come to trust me in time, Celeste.”

  “I doubt it. I know what you want and that doesn't suggest trust to me.” Trust a man who wanted nothing more than to see her fail? No, that wasn't about to happen. “Leave me alone for a while, Steven. Please.”

  “Why should I?”

  “Because if you don't I'll be forced to tell the guards that you're hounding me.” She didn't even have to raise her voice, not that there would have been a point in doing so. It wasn't worth the effort.

  No, he isn't worth it.

  So who was?

  Davien.

  Was he, or was she just wishing he would be?

  Chapter Seven

  He waited outside her door, leaning against the wall, his tri-corn hat pulled low over his eyes. “I was beginning to wonder if you were ever going to show up, woman.”

  “Was there something you wanted, Tearlach?” She took a deep breath, trying to stay calm.

  “Retribution for your little games,” his smile didn't touch his eyes. “You owe me, fully.”

  “I owe you nothing at all. Not after everything you've done to me.” She kept her voice low pitched, calm as she listened watched him. “You raped me. Abused me. Dragged me off the street when I was trying to find my way home. So just what do I owe you for?”

  “The way you treated me in front of everyone else, and kicking me... ”

  “Stomped.”

  “What?”

  “I stomped on your foot. I didn't kick you. I stomped my heel down on top of your foot. You deserved it because of the way you touched me without my consent.” Great, first Steven, now Tearlach. Just what was it going to take to find a little time to herself?

  “You ran from me, then this entire shit in the hall, I'm not going to put up with this any longer.” He pushed up from the wall and looked at her, his gaze narrowed. “You're mine, Celeste.”

  “No. I'm not. I've never been yours. I'm not a slave. Not yours, and not Davien's.” Her gaze flickered to the closed door, then back to the waiting man. “You've read the laws of the Island, you know I cannot be forced, and I'm not going to drop to my knees for you either, so leave me alone.”

  He growled, his jaw clenching as he stood there. “You're going to regret this.”

  “No, I don't think so.” She took a step toward the door. “I'm not going to give up what I've carved out for myself here. Especially for someone like you.”

  “Like me?” His growl deepened. “What do you mean like me? I'm from Ireland, same as you! You're no better than me. If you think you are then I need to knock that snobbery out of you.”

  “Ah, and there it is again, your lack of understanding of women.” She lifted her chin and looked, calmly at him. “You truly don't understand how little I think of you now, do you?”

  His gaze darkened. “Bitch!”

  “Perhaps I am, but I am not your bitch.” Especially not with the new rules on the status of such a person. She was not and never would be his bitch. “Now leave, before I call the... ”

  He moved without warning, clearing the distance between them. One hand closed on her throat, preventing her from crying out, the other yanked open her door. Celeste struggled as he forced her into her room, but it did her no good, he was stronger than she was. She couldn't get free. Couldn't scream. Panic gripped her soul.

  “There's no escape from me Celeste.” He growled down at her and thrust her toward the bed. She coughed, trying to clear her throat, knowing she had to scream, but he was on her before she had the chance. He pinned her to the bed, glaring down at her. “You will be mine again.”

  “Le— let me go!”

  “No. Not now. Not ever.” He leaned down over her, his face only a breath away from hers. “You will be mine again. You have no choice on this.”

  Choice. She always had a choice, even when owned. “You can't force me to become yours.”

  “Yes, I can.”

  “Not by the laws of the Island.” She shifted slightly beneath him. Just a little more and she'd be able to thrust her knee into his groin. “You cannot force me into being yours. That's clear, you went back over the laws of the... ”

  “What happens within the privacy of your room stays there. You cannot complain to the guards about it or seek aid. Perhaps you should of read the rules a little more closely yourself, slut?”

  God, no. He can't be right. So why had the guard told her that what happened in the privacy of her room stayed there?

  “Yes, I can see it sinking in now.” His smile chilled her soul. “You understand you can't run for
help, or scream, they'll see it as sour grapes and your reputation here is then damaged.”

  There had to be a way around this. She hadn't said he could enter her room and— and she had no proof. How could she ever hope for them to back her on her claims when she couldn't prove what had happened? Trapped.

  “You're panicking.”

  She shook her head, trying to deny it though it was a waste of time. He could see it in her eyes, the way she shook, even her breathing gave her away. She had to get this back under control and not let him ruin her life again. “And just what do you plan on doing?”

  “Anything I want.”

  “Then do get on with it, I want to get some sleep.” She forced a cool tone into her voice that she didn't feel right now. “Better yet, wake me when it's over.”

  His growl threatened to wake the dead as he sat up over her, glaring down at her, his dark eyes alit with a fury that warned her she had gone too far. “You stupid slut, pissing me off is not a good idea.”

  “No matter what you do to me I'll never come back to you, Tearlach.”

  “You make it sound as though I should care what you want, or think.”

  “If you want someone who is able to serve you then you should care.”

  “I don't want someone who is able to serve, I want you and you will serve me, in whatever manner I desire. You will do it, regardless of what you want or think you can do, you will have no choice.” His growled words caressed her senses, leaving her shaking, unable to hold back her fear any longer.

  “You'll regret this... ”

  “No, I won't.” His smile lacked any glimmer of humanity. “I have done nothing I regret. Not in those I have killed, or those I have turned into slaves.”

  “You didn't turn me into a slave, Tearlach. Davien did.” Celeste kept herself calm, or tried to, as she spoke. It wasn't working very well. “He took me. He trained me. All you did was snatch me from the street after he'd laid the ground work.”

  “I captured you and made you... ”

  “You raped me, beat me and didn't make me do anything.”

  “You came for me.” He smirked.

  “And that's because Davien trained me that way.” She tensed beneath him, waiting for the first blow to fall. “You had nothing to do with it. I was reacting in the way he trained me.”