Diaries of a Heartbroken Duchess: A Historical Regency Romance Collection

by Hamilton, Hanna

  Diana went to Miriam’s armoire and hung up the dress, then she turned to Geoffrey. She reached over and pinched his nose.

  “Ouch, that hurt,” he protested.

  “That is because you are a Mister Nosey.” She turned from him and started back down the stairs. “I must work. I have much to do before the Earl’s book comes out and my publisher wants my new novel as soon as possible.”

  “Do you think we can get a signed copy of his book?” he asked as he pursued her to the front door.

  “I think that might be possible. But would you read it?”

  “I might. Does it have naughty bits?”

  “I would not know, Geoffrey, I have not read it yet. Say hello to Miriam when she gets back and tell her the party went well.”

  “Bye,” Geoffrey waved as she went back toward her house.

  Back home she stopped by the gallery to make sure the orchid was watered, said hello to her mother, then headed to her room to start writing.

  Her first order of business was to compose a sample chapter of her new book for Sir Cecil. He wanted a Christmas theme so she set to work writing that chapter.

  The snow was nearly a foot deep the week before Christmas as the twin brother and sister headed out of the grimy front door with the few gifts they had managed to scrounge from the trash heap. They had wrapped their gifts in pages from an abandoned newspaper they found on a park bench. The ten year-old brother and sister…

  Diana struggled with who the gifts were for… then she knew…

  …were on their way to their grandmother who had taken to bed several weeks ago and her wracking cough still prevented her from getting out of bed or going outdoors.

  The two had also managed to find two cheese rinds and half a loaf of stale bread from behind the grocers on Killdare Alley. It was not going to be a very merry Christmas, but it was better than nothing and they smiled as they passed the carolers in front of the china shop.

  “Tommy,” the sister asked her brother, “do you think mother will…

  There was a loud knocking at the front door and Diana was jarred from her concentration.

  “Oh Lord, who can that be?” she asked as she rose from her desk and headed downstairs to answer.

  “Oh, Adam… Come in if you like,” she said, not very welcomingly. “I thought you were coming at teatime.”

  “I could not wait any longer to see you. Did I catch you at a bad time?” Adam asked. He was carrying another bakery box. “I brought you some wonderful eclairs. I thought if you wanted some tea now we might…”

  Diana wanted to say something rude for being interrupted, but she remembered that Adam was now her fiancé, and he was doing the family a large favor by arranging the loan for the family to save their home. So… she took a deep breath and said, “Tea would be lovely. And how are you this fine day, Adam?”

  Adam gave her a big smile as he put the box on the kitchen table as she filled the kettle.

  “Should I go and invite your mother? And your father? Is he in?”

  “You might ask Mother if you like, but Father is at his college rooms for a tutorial, I believe.”

  “I shall be right back,” Adam said, as he went to fetch her mother.

  Alone for a brief moment, Diana scowled and felt frustrated at having so little control over her own life these days. What with her responsibilities with the family, and her new work with Robert, it seemed almost impossible to hope for long stretches of concentrated writing time.

  Then just as Adam returned with her mother, the kettle boiled and she poured the water for the tea.

  “Ooo, look another bakery box,” Mother said turning to Adam and giving him a quick peck on the cheek. “My dear boy, you are too kind to us. You are certain to spoil us and add inches to our waists,” she said as she patted her stomach.

  “Eclairs, Mother. I think we should split one.”

  “Very sensible, but not much fun. I shall have a whole one if you do not mind.”

  Diana handed plates to Adam to serve them. “Just half of one for me.”

  “And I shall have the other half,” he replied as he served the eclairs.

  While Diana served the tea, Mother remained standing. “I cannot leave the gallery unattended. I will take my tea with me if you do not mind.

  “Not at all,” Diana said.

  Mother left and Diana and Adam sat at the kitchen table.

  “I was thinking about our honeymoon.” He looked up to see her reaction. “Papa suggested we go abroad. What would you think about Italy or Greece?”

  Diana did not want to think about such things when she had so much to do on her book.

  “I hope you are not going to make a practice of just dropping by whenever you want,” she snapped. “I have a writing deadline on my new book and I must set regular hours to work undisturbed each morning.”

  Adam seemed shocked by Diana’s outburst and did not speak for a moment or two.

  “I had no idea… I am so sorry. I… I… just assumed as we were engaged…”

  “Married or not, I need my time alone... I cannot just have…”

  Adam stiffened. “Diana, do you want this marriage or not? If not, I should like to know. If you do not care for me then I feel it is only right to disengage from our relationship. I must say, I have felt all along that you are only marrying me to secure the loan for your father. Is that not so?”

  Diana felt the sting of truth in his accusation and wanted to defend herself when there was knocking at the front door.

  “Oh, for goodness sake. Who can that be now?” she said angrily, as she rose to answer the door.

  She forcefully flung the door open and there were Abigale and Kitty with broad smiles.

  “I hope we are not disturbing you, Abigale said.

  “But we have a new letter from Nephew Brandon and we thought you might like to have us read it to you,” Kitty added.

  Diana was nearly at her wit's end and snipped, “Oh, ladies, this is not at all a good time. And what would make you think I would have any interest, whatsoever, in more boring news from your moronic nephew.”

  Adam had come up behind her and heard her scathing remark. He put his hand on her shoulder, “Diana… how could you say such a thing?”

  The sisters were horrified and flustered. They turned to leave but turned back.

  “Oh, Miss Diana we had no idea…”

  “We did not know you felt that way…”

  “Be assured we shall never invade your privacy again,” Kitty said, still in a tither.

  Adam spoke up. “Ladies, please forgive Diana, we were having a little argument as you arrived and she was upset with me and unfortunately she took it out on the two of you. I am certain she did not mean a word of what she said.”

  The sisters were weeping by now and they turned and fled down the garden path.

  Adam turned to Diana. “How could you say such a mean thing to those two lovely and lonely sisters? You should be ashamed of yourself. Those letters from their nephew mean the world to them and you were so cruel.”

  Now Diana burst into tears, “Oh, Adam. I am so ashamed—truly. I was absolutely horrible. I will find some means to apologize. But not right now. I am too upset.”

  “Come on,” Adam said, taking her arm and leading her back to the kitchen and sat her back down at the table.

  “This has been a rough day, has it not?” he asked.

  Diana stretched her arms across the table and lay her forehead on her arms.

  “It has been a trial and I have been inexcusable—to you and to the dear sisters. Can you, at least, forgive me?”

  “Of course, I can. But we must still address the central issue between us. Do you want to marry me?” he asked firmly. “The issue needs to be resolved.”

  With her head still on her arms she turned to him and asked, “Can we deal with this later, please. I am too upset to have a rational discussion.”

  Adam stood. “Very well then, I shall leave you alone to comp
ose yourself. But we must speak about these things soon. And if you decide you still want to marry me, think about where you might like to go on the honeymoon. The sooner we can book the trip the better.”

  “Yes, Adam,” she said turning away from him with her head still on her arms.

  * * *

  Diana spent a restless night with very little sleep. She could not believe she had behaved as badly as she had with both Adam and the Goodwin sisters. And when she finally got out of bed she felt fatigued and wretched.

  She stumbled down to breakfast to find her father at breakfast reading through his latest manuscript. He looked up as she came into the kitchen.

  “Good morning, daughter.”

  “Father…” she said collapsing into a chair and staring blankly into space.

  “I ran into Master Adam yesterday afternoon and he gave me a note and asked me to give it to you.” He fumbled in his coat pocket and produced the envelope. “Here you are, my dear,” he said, handing it to her.

  Diana opened the envelope and read,

  My Dearest Diana,

  Tempers were high this morning during my visit. And I wish to let you know that I am partially to blame. I have not given enough consideration to your need to write undisturbed each morning, and I shall endeavor to keep my visits to the afternoons.

  However, it is not always possible for me to give you advance warning of my arrival and I think that as your fiancé I must be given some liberty to call on you without notice each time I need to see you.

  That is… if I am still your fiancé.

  “Please regard this as notice that I shall call on you later tomorrow afternoon so that we may conclude our interrupted conversation from this morning.

  Ever your devoted,

  Adam

  Oh, dear… she thought. He is still upset. She must make things right with him… and the Goodwin sisters. But first things first—Adam. She had made a conscious decision to marry him for the good of her family and she must not jeopardize that arrangement in any way. She must confirm the marriage and allow the loan to proceed.

  Father spoke up. “Oh… I got the details of Adam’s father’s address when I saw Adam yesterday. There is no need for you to acquire that information too.”

  “Thank you for letting me know, Father.”

  As Diana was late coming down to breakfast her mother was already at the gallery. Shortly, her father finished his breakfast and rose. “Are you not eating any breakfast?” he asked.

  “I shall. I did not sleep well and am still a little befuddled. I will make something for myself shortly.”

  “Very well, my dear. I shall be working at home on my manuscript today. So, you may find me in my study if you need me.”

  Father started to leave but asked, “Will you be writing today? I was thinking if not, you might want to review my last chapter. I think it will do, but I always value input from your examination.”

  “I am not sure if I am of much use to any one today—to either myself or to you. However, if I feel up to it later I will stop by your study and take a look at the chapter.”

  “Thank you, my dear.”

  * * *

  Diana sat at her desk staring at her manuscript. She read through what she had written recently but could not concentrate, so she decided to abandon any thought of work today and began to go through her clothes and see if any needed cleaning or if any were ready to be discarded if they were too worn or little used.

  However, by ten-thirty, she was so tired she lay down on her bed and drifted off to sleep.

  She awoke in time for lunch, much refreshed. She detected cooking aromas coming from downstairs and she went to investigate as she had skipped breakfast and was now hungry.

  As she entered the kitchen she found her mother and Robert at the stove.

  “Robert, what are you doing here?” she asked greatly surprised.

  “No hello? Just Robert, what are you doing here?” he asked chuckling.

  “He called at the gallery to see how his orchid was doing and I invited him to lunch,” Mother said.

  Diana laughed. The first laugh and light moment she had experienced for several days.

  “Well, to be honest, I did not come just to see the orchid. I thought if you were free we might have an opportunity to talk about the book so you could begin to familiarize yourself with its content.”

  Diana already knew she was not going to get any of her own work done today, so that seemed appealing.

  “No disrespect to your mother’s cooking, but I actually brought along a picnic and I thought we might take a punt down the Cam, find ourselves a nice spot, and have a leisurely lunch and talk,” Robert suggested.

  “That sounds delightful, as long as you do not topple in the river as you punt.”

  “Not a chance. I am an expert punter. Remember, I spent my undergraduate years here. At least half of which were spent being a truant on the river.”

  Diana realized that her lifted spirits were not only due to her nap but also because of Robert’s presence and the opportunity to spend more time alone with him.

  “Then I am ready when you are.”

  Chapter 11

  Robert had come with a horse and cart today hoping that Diana would accept his offer of the picnic.

  He helped Diana into the cart after she had secured herself a sunhat and shawl as it was only early April and could still be chilly.

  “Go on,” Robert instructed the horse and snapped the reins.

  “Where are we headed?” Diana asked.

  “I have a small house further down on the Cam and I keep a punt there.”

  “Your own punt? My, how convenient.”

  “I like to take a break from Balfour and my sister from time to time without going all the way to London.”

  Diana cast a quick glance at Robert. “Your sister… she is older than you are?”

  “She is, and helped raise me after our parents died.”

  “You must love her dearly.”

  Now Robert gave her a quick glance. “I do. But… well, she can be difficult. We do not always see eye to eye on many issues and it has been difficult for her to transition from being in control of me to me being in control of her as the new head of the household.”

  “I see.”

  “But I do love her dearly and wish that she might find herself a husband.”

  Diana laughed. “To take her away?”

  “Yes, I am ashamed to admit.”

  “I observed at dinner the other evening that she seemed to be trying to set you up with Lady Wilton. Did I misread the situation?”

  “You did not. However, the rather rowdy and inebriated Viscount seemed to be demanding her attention—much to the chagrin of my sister I noticed.”

  Diana laughed. “Ah, the best laid plans…”

  Before long they arrived at the Earl’s house on the Cam, and Robert transferred the picnic basket from the cart to the punt.

  And once Diana was settled comfortably in her seat, Robert pushed away from the dock and began poling their leisurely, late-morning way down the river.

  As Robert punted, he observed Diana enjoying the view along the banks. She was so totally at ease and secure in herself. He knew they would be spending a lot to time together. Especially after the book was published and she would be attending many publicity functions which he also planned to attend.

  Each time he was with her—particularly when they were alone together—he grew ever fonder of her, and regretted that she was engaged. Of course, that was very selfish, and he wished her all possible happiness. But he also sensed that, for some unknown reason, her engagement was not all that secure.”

  “Ah, here we are. This is the spot where I love to picnic,” Robert said as he guided the punt to shore. He hopped off, secured the boat, and then helped Diana ashore, taking her warm hand and regretting letting go.

  “Do you bring many of your lady friends here to picnic?” Diana asked teasingly.

  “By
the dozens. But not all at the same time,” he teased back.

  They proceeded to spread out a blanket and prepare the picnic lunch.

  “I have a lovely Beaujolais that I think you might enjoy,” he said, as he uncorked the bottle and poured them each a glass.