Baby Times Two

by Marie Ferrarella

  He wasn’t thinking of himself. “I have nothing to do with it. The question is, will you like it?”

  He knew her too well. Gina flounced down on the bed. The telephone nearly dropped out of her hand. “No, damn it.”

  His voice was patient, but there was an underlying kindness in it. “Then why don’t you remain at the hotel, remain at your post, and see this thing through?”

  Her post. He made it sound as if she were a little soldier. Well, she wasn’t a soldier. She was a woman, a hurting woman. A woman with fears.

  “I can’t. I just can’t.” She covered her mouth with her hand. She wasn’t going to cry. Not long distance. Not short distance. Taking a deep breath, she tried to sound a little more dignified. “Rene, please don’t ask any more questions. Just tell me that you can come and take over for me.”

  She didn’t wait for him to reply, her mind bouncing from one thing to another. “Most of the details are almost squared away. Everything’s been ordered, it’s just a matter of hounding everyone to get delivery on time. You hound very well.”

  He didn’t pick up on the banter. She heard him sigh and could see the downward curve of his mouth in her mind’s eye. “I think it’s a mistake.”

  That was where he was wrong. “No, it’s saving me from making a mistake.”

  She had given him no details and he’d asked for none. But he heard things in her voice, things she wasn’t saying. “If you feel that strongly about it—”

  She was on her feet again and pacing, too restless with her decision to sit. “I do.”

  He’d given it his best attempt. Perhaps this was more than she could handle. “Very well, I’ll book a flight for the morning.”

  She let out a long sigh. If Rene had refused to take her place, she would have had to stick it out. She couldn’t have left James in a lurch. Her relief was immense.

  “I appreciate it.”

  “You should.” There was another long pause, as if Rene was searching for the proper words. Emotions were not his forte. “Are you all right?”

  She saw her reflection in the oval wooden-framed mirror above the bureau. The face that looked back at her was definitely not all right. “No.”

  Concern quickened his voice, dulling the crispness. “Has he done something to you?”

  Yes, he’s made me love him again, the bastard.

  “Nothing you can call him out for.” She appreciated the show of concern. It took a little of the chill away from her heart.

  Rene made an impatient noise. “And me with my new dueling pistols just collecting dust.” His voice grew grave. “Don’t do anything rash. I’ll be there before noon.”

  “Thank you.”

  A loud roll of thunder punctuated the end of the conversation. Gina placed the telephone back on the nightstand.

  She let out a long, tortured sigh as she snapped the locks on her suitcase. All right, she was fleeing, running like a coward, but there were no other options available to her. Not if she was going to save herself.

  She knew she couldn’t just brazen out the rest of the time she had to remain here. She didn’t have it in her. She hated knowing that about herself, but she had to face the truth. Gina was no match for her own emotions. And Chase’s mouth.

  Being with Chase and not being with him was just too painful. And she was weakening. Drastically.

  The next time there might not be any interruptions to save her, no telephone calls from egotistical chefs, no erroneous shipments of lithographs to deal with. Next time, she would make love with him.

  And sell herself down the river of despair.

  It would never work between them. Hadn’t she given it her best shot the first time around? She had wanted to remain married to Chase more than anything in the world. And it had somehow, mysteriously broken apart in her hands, like an exquisite ancient lace doily that fell apart when it came in contact with air.

  She couldn’t delude herself that something magical would take place the second time to make it all right. There was no magic left. Not the kind they needed.

  They’d used up all the magic. It had been there when they met, when they’d fallen in love.

  When they’d made love.

  Gina wasn’t naive enough to believe that it would come again.

  She crossed to the window and looked out. The rain was coming down relentlessly. She blinked, feeling her eyes fill. She wasn’t going to make things worse by crying. What would be the use of it?

  Another peal of thunder shook the window and she stepped back. The knock on the door seemed to echo the sound, loud and demanding.

  She swung around, startled. “Yes?”

  He’d given her a little time to get herself together, but Chase had a bad feeling about this. There wasn’t anything he could point a finger at, just a feeling. “Open the door, Gina.”

  Gina stiffened. She stared at the door, willing it to stay in place. “I’d rather not.”

  He wasn’t up to playing games. He felt his temper flaring. “Open the door, damn it, or I’ll kick it in.”

  She could feel her own temper rising to meet his and she was grateful for it. Temper kept her from falling apart. “Not after I had all the old ones replaced.”

  Hand on her hip, Gina threw open the door. “What is it?”

  He didn’t wait to be invited in, he just walked inside. Chase wanted to talk things through with her. He’d had enough of this cat-and-mouse nonsense. It was time they had everything out in the open, her grievances and his, plainly spelled out.

  “I wanted to talk to you. I—”

  He stopped. She’d changed her clothes and looked as though she were going somewhere. He saw the suitcase on the bed. The closet was open. And empty.

  Chase pointed toward the bed, his mouth grim. “What’s that?”

  She raised her chin, bracing for a fight. She’d been in enough of them with Chase to know when one was rolling in. Just behind him, a flash of lightning lit up the sky as if it were midday, then was extinguished.

  “A suitcase.”

  His brow quirked and his eyes went flat. He hadn’t thought she’d run. “You’re packed.”

  Perhaps it was the storm outside. Or the one threatening her within. Whatever the reason, she felt edgy again. Being around Chase did that to her, she decided. “Very observant.”

  He wanted to hold her, to shake her until she came to her senses. He shoved his hands into his pockets to curtail the impulse. “Why?”

  She lifted a careless shoulder, then let it drop again. She wished she could have left without seeing him again. Coward times two, she thought. “I’m fond of these clothes. I want to take them back with me.”

  It was all he could do to keep the fine point from his temper. She was pushing it. “Don’t get flippant. You’re leaving, aren’t you?”

  She was dressed, the suitcase was packed. The assumption was obvious. “Boy, nothing gets by you, does it?”

  Gina began to pace again, but Chase was in her way. And he meant to continue getting in her way until she stopped running. “Why?” The question was growled rather than actually spoken.

  She blew out a breath and looked past his head. She couldn’t risk his eyes. “Because we almost made love down there.”

  He wanted her with an intensity that almost frightened him. She was the opportunity he had let slip through his fingers and he wasn’t about to let that happen again. Not for reasons he didn’t understand. Not this time. He was older and if not wiser as she’d scoffed, then at least more intuitive.

  He’d schooled himself to lose the edge in his voice. “Granted, but that was never a reason for you to run off before.” She looked at him defiantly, fear still glimmering in her eyes, and he nearly lost it. But at the last moment, he maintained his calm. “Would it help if I promised to keep my hands off you?”

  He was only half the problem. She was the other half. “No. Because maybe I couldn’t keep my hands off you.”

  She could still confuse him faster than an
yone he’d ever known. “If you feel that way, then what’s the problem?”

  Chase was too close to her. Gina took a step away from him, then doubled it twice more. She needed space, to breathe, to think.

  She leaned against the windowsill, her back to nature’s tantrum. “The problem was never physical, Chase. The problem was the rest of it. Us. We don’t fit.”

  His mouth curved as he thought of earlier. He could see that was on her mind as well. “Yes, we do.”

  “Emotionally.”

  All right, he’d give her that, especially since she seemed to believe it so much.

  “Maybe I was a little too insensitive and maybe you were a little too sensitive. The blame lies with both of us.” Unable to resist, he placed his hands on her shoulders. “But—”

  She stiffened instantly, and then shrugged him off. “No ‘buts,’ Chase. It’s over. I’m leaving.” She threw her purse next to the suitcase on the bed. “I’ve got a one a.m. flight to Orange County.”

  He stared at her as if she wasn’t making any sense. Because she wasn’t. “You’re not even going to stay the night?”

  If she remained tonight, she’d be tempted to stay longer. Tempted to do other things and open Pandora’s box all over again. “What’s the point?”

  He was the point, he thought. They were the point. But all he could do was indicate the window. When in doubt, talk about the weather. “It’s miserable out.”

  To emphasize his words, thunder crashed like timpani during the 1812 Overture.

  Gina attempted to pretend it didn’t affect her. She’d always hated thunderstorms. And the dark.

  Little-girl fears, she reminded herself. And she hadn’t been a little girl in a long, long time.

  “I’m not going to walk all the way to California. If I don’t go now—”

  No, she wasn’t going to explain herself to him. If she did, he’d only try to take advantage of her vulnerability.

  “I just have to go, all right? Stop interfering with my life, damn you.”

  At a complete loss and because he had the distinct urge to strangle her, Chase turned on his heel and stormed out, his anger rivaling the weather outside. The door slammed in his wake.

  It was a scene they had played out so many times, Gina had lost count. It made her weary just to watch it unfold. She’d rail, he’d storm and then one of them would walk out. Usually it was Chase—just before she threw something.

  That was no way to conduct a relationship.

  It just told her that she was right to leave. No matter how glorious things looked, this was the core. This was what underlined it all.

  And she was too emotionally needy to put up with all that again. Once was more than enough. Once had been too much.

  Gina picked up the telephone receiver as another angry flash of lightning creased the brow of the sky. It hung there, suspended, a javelin hurled by one of the gods, before it hurtled down to earth.

  She shivered involuntarily. The storm had come so suddenly, it was almost as if nature had lost its temper and gotten angry.

  Welcome to the club, she thought as she pressed the letter O.

  It took several rings before Shirley answered. Gina knew that Shirley, who was Benjamin’s distant cousin, lived at the hotel, as did Benjamin. To her knowledge, everyone else had gone home for the night.

  She relaxed slightly when she heard the soothing voice say, “Hello?”

  “Hi, this is Gina. Is Benjamin around? I have to talk to him.”

  Shirley didn’t have to be as astute a student of human nature as she was to know that something was bothering Gina. “He’s in the back. Something wrong?”

  Now there was an understatement. Everything was wrong. Gina tried to sound as professional as possible, given the lump in her throat.

  “There’s been a change in plans. I have to leave. Immediately. I just wanted him to know. I’ll be down in the lobby in a few minutes. Ask him to meet me there.”

  Gina hung up before Shirley could comment on the turn of events. She didn’t need any more advice and she had a sneaking feeling that Shirley, though not one to intrude, would feel compelled to offer her a word or two.

  She didn’t need advice, she just needed to get away. To think and clear her head.

  To get back to the life she’d forged for herself. As Gina turned to pick up her suitcase, the lights flickered flirtatiously.

  She stood for a moment, regarding the overhead lights like someone expecting a parlor trick to be repeated. When the lights remained steady, she picked up her suitcase and purse and headed for the door.

  And escape.

  She watched Chase’s door warily as she passed his room. She half expected to see it fly open and to have him pull her in.

  Perhaps, a tiny voice whispered in her head, she was half-hoping he would.

  No, no, she wasn’t, she insisted silently as she hurried by. She just wanted to be left alone.

  There was absolutely nothing Chase could say to convince her that they should give it another try. That this time, it was going to work. Words were easy enough to throw around, but she had experience behind her. And experience outweighed words.

  Nervously, she jabbed the elevator button, waiting for it to reach her floor, hoping it would before Chase emerged and saw her standing there.

  He hadn’t set out to be deliberately cruel. She knew that, at least in her rational moments she did. He just didn’t understand. He didn’t begin to understand her vast need to be loved, to be cherished. To feel as if she meant something to the person she loved. He hadn’t acted as if she did. She’d taken a distant second to his work, to his goals.

  Maybe she was just looking for something that didn’t exist, she thought as the elevator arrived. It was the one they used to move the furniture. The padded drop cloths were still in place. The twelfth floor was still waiting for its new furniture.

  Maybe Mr. Perfect didn’t exist, but she wasn’t about to settle for a life of quiet desperation. Or a not so quiet one either.

  She got in the car and pressed the button for the ground floor. The doors slid noiselessly closed in front of her, cocooning her from the sound of the storm. From all noise altogether.

  Struggling to pull herself together, Gina sighed as she leaned against the padded drop cloths.

  In a few hours, this would all be over. She’d be back home and could go on with her life. This whole episode would be put behind her. She’d go back to the way things had been, sealed and secure.

  She’d—

  Gina caught her breath as the elevator suddenly shuddered and then rumbled to a stop. She looked at the parade of lights on the panel above her head. Number three had a glow around it. That meant she was on her way to the second floor.

  Now what? Irritated, wanting to be on her way, Gina punched the alarm button.

  Just after she did, she was swallowed up by total darkness.

  * * *

  Chase had been prowling around the lobby, restless, angry, not knowing what his next move would be. The only thing he knew was that he wasn’t letting Gina leave the hotel, even if he had to bully her into staying. He’d come directly down here after leaving her room, ready to ambush her and abort her escape when she finally came down. It was nothing short of that: an escape.

  He had a feeling that if she walked out now, that would be the end of it. They would never get back together again. And he couldn’t let that happen.

  He understood now how she had felt when he’d walked away from her. He hadn’t thought there were any options available then either.

  But there were. There were always options if you loved someone. The trick was to find them.

  Tit for tat, eh, Gina? I’m sorry, honey. Sorry you went through this. But we’ve got something special and I’m not letting it go this time.

  Chase saw Benjamin walking into the foyer toward him just as the lights flickered capriciously overhead. The storm that was enshrouding the area seemed to have come out of nowhere. It certai
nly hadn’t been on the weatherman’s agenda when Chase had listened to the radio that morning.

  Chase turned toward the large bay window that faced the entranceway. Outside there was nothing but a tangle of wind and rain competing for the same space.

  There was no way he was going to let Gina fly in weather like this, even if the airplanes were still running, which he doubted. More than likely, the whole airport was shut down for the duration. This seemed just too fierce a storm to be at loggerheads with.

  Maybe for once, things were on his side. With the airport closed that gave him a little leeway.

  That—

  Whatever he was thinking was temporarily forgotten as the lights all around him suddenly went off like candles being simultaneously snuffed out.

  Just as suddenly, a wide beam sliced through the darkness and spread out over the floor near Chase. Benjamin reached him, a flashlight in his hand.

  Chase nodded at the slim silver rod. “When did you pick that up?”

  Benjamin shifted the flashlight to his other hand. “I started carrying this around with me as soon as I saw the sky changing about half an hour ago. These storms spring out of the desert like mountain lions. I don’t like being caught in the dark unless it’s outside. There’s too much furniture in here to bump into.”

  Chase looked out the window. Everything beyond the casement was black. There were no lights from this part of the city at all.

  He frowned, thinking of Gina upstairs in her room. Gina who hated the dark. “Looks like a power outage.”

  Benjamin nodded. “This kind of storm makes visibility practically nonexistent. Somebody probably plowed their 4 by 4 right into a utility pole, knocked down a few power lines. Won’t be the first time.” Benjamin motioned toward the front desk. “There’s a radio back there. Let’s see if we can get a handle on what’s going on.”

  He shifted the beam toward the rear of the foyer. Chase followed him to the desk.

  “Wouldn’t the radio be out, too?”

  “Batteries.” Benjamin grinned, rounding the desk. “Hey, Boy Scouts aren’t the only ones who are prepared. Here, hold this.” He handed Chase his flashlight.