Come Home to Me

by Brenda Novak

  “A favor? Having my baby and pretending he belongs to some...some asshole in Arizona who supposedly used you for an hour or two? That’s doing me a favor?”

  If only he knew what’d happened in Arizona, how close she’d come to being swallowed up by the quicksand of her drug abuse, maybe he’d have an ounce or two of understanding. “It’s not like I got pregnant on purpose, Aaron. It’s not like I wanted to be put in that situation.”

  “Then how’d it happen?”

  “I have no idea! When my period didn’t come, I was as surprised as you are now. We always used birth control so...maybe you’re not his father.”

  If she could create enough doubt, would he walk away? Why not? He didn’t have to open this Pandora’s box.

  “Who else could it be?”

  She didn’t have any candidates to offer him. He knew everyone she knew around here, and he wouldn’t believe it was someone from Arizona if she brought that up again. It wasn’t as if she could point a finger at someone without expecting him to demand verification, and there was no chance she could give him that. When she found out she was pregnant, it had been at least six months since she’d had sex with another man. Filled with panic and despair, she’d behaved badly in that short time after her period didn’t come—and she’d decided in retrospect that she’d done it just to prove how unlovable and unworthy she was. But that didn’t change Wyatt’s paternity. “I didn’t get his name.”

  He stepped closer. “When did it happen?”

  “I can’t tell you that, either.”

  With a curse, he raked his fingers through his hair. “So you were pregnant before you left? There’s no chance it happened after?” When she hesitated, he raised his eyebrows. “I’m going to get a paternity test, so you might as well tell me the truth.”

  She’d guessed as much. She wiped her cheeks. “That’s partly why I left. But if it helps to think he could belong to someone else, then think it.”

  “Helps?” he echoed. “How is that supposed to help if it’s not true?”

  “It doesn’t matter if it’s true! I’ve taken full responsibility. I haven’t asked you for anything and I never will. Just walk away!”

  “How? The fact remains that you lied!”

  “I knew you wouldn’t be happy with the news,” she snapped, finally rallying enough to come back at him. “I did what I thought was best for all of us at the time.”

  “You thought it was best for my son to grow up without his father?” He seemed wounded, which surprised her. “I’m not perfect, Presley, but am I really that bad?”

  “I could have aborted him. I almost did. If I’d gone through with it, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. So how is it a major crime that I kept him a secret? You wouldn’t have wanted him even if I’d told you about him!”

  Wyatt had had enough. Fussing and squirming, he fought to escape Aaron’s hold.

  Aaron set him on the floor, but when she crouched to pick him up, Aaron intercepted her. “No way. Leave him where he is.”

  “Why?”

  He handed Wyatt his bat. “Because I won’t have you cuddling him and staring at me as if I’m some kind of ogre. I have a right to be mad, damn it.”

  Wyatt peered around one of his legs, uncertain now that he’d been released whether or not he should be upset. He didn’t continue to cry, but his lip quivered as he glanced from one adult to the other.

  “You have every right to be mad,” she agreed. “But what were my options? Was I supposed to drop him off on your doorstep? Take care of him myself but ask you to help feed and clothe him even though you had no voice in my decision to keep him? Or should I have put him up for adoption? Would that have made you happier? I told you I almost terminated the pregnancy. I went to an abortion clinic in Arizona, you know.” Her voice broke as Wyatt managed to navigate around Aaron. When he reached her, he seemed pleased with himself, but she didn’t dare pick him up. She was too busy trying to make Aaron understand, too busy struggling with the strong emotions Wyatt—and Aaron—evoked.

  Aaron looked at her for several seconds. “What stopped you from going through with it?”

  That had been her darkest moment, but it was also the turning point, when she’d decided to fight for a better life. Wyatt had been her motivation. It didn’t hurt that he was part of Aaron, a part she could keep. But there was no reason to go into all that. A man who’d never been in love wouldn’t understand.

  “I couldn’t,” she said. “And I can’t tell you how glad I am that I didn’t.”

  Whether it was that close call or the tears in her eyes, something cracked Aaron’s hard, angry exterior. She felt him soften as, with a sigh, he stopped scowling and began to pace. “You could’ve communicated with me, damn it. You could’ve told me. We should’ve decided together! I would never have encouraged you to get an abortion or give him up if you didn’t want to.”

  “So you would’ve offered to...what? Coparent? Or would you just have sent me a check every month?”

  “I would’ve done whatever we agreed I should do!”

  She shook her head. “Let’s face it, Aaron. You weren’t ready for a child. You might have helped out financially, but you would’ve been glad to see me go, along with your new responsibility. So, you’re mad that I didn’t charge you?”

  He sent her a disgruntled look. “You didn’t have a crystal ball. Stop acting as if you knew how I would’ve reacted.”

  “I didn’t need a crystal ball. I knew how you felt about me, how tired you’d become of our one-sided relationship. So I let you go on with your life completely unfettered. I wanted our baby, even if you wouldn’t. It seemed fair at the time.”

  “There you go again, saying I wouldn’t have wanted him. But you didn’t give me the chance to decide. That’s why I’m upset—not to mention that you flat-out lied! I would rather have known the truth!”

  He was right, of course. It was fear, more than anything else, that had caused her to do what she’d done—fear that he would somehow try to take control of the situation. What if he sued for custody? If not now, later? Since he didn’t particularly care about her that was a very real possibility.

  She reached down to smooth Wyatt’s hair from his forehead. “What made you suspect?”

  Pivoting at the far side of the room, he shoved his hands in his pockets but didn’t protest when she lifted her son into her arms. “Riley’s mother has been blabbing her big mouth all over town.”

  “Mrs. Stinson? But how—”

  “She went to get her hair done this morning and told everyone at Shearwood Forest that he’s the spitting image of me.”

  Did he see the resemblance? He didn’t indicate one way or the other.

  Too exhausted, physically and emotionally, to continue standing while holding her son, Presley sank into her favorite chair. “That was all it took?”

  “Once I started wondering–” he dropped onto the sofa “–I just...knew.”

  The fatalism in his voice made her wince. “I’m sorry, Aaron.”

  When he didn’t answer, she set about fixing Wyatt’s diaper so it would do the job it was intended to do. Trying to refasten the tabs gave her something to concentrate on besides Aaron’s shell-shocked demeanor. But adjusting it only ruined the diaper. She might’ve teased him about his inability to properly change a baby, but doubted that would go over very well at the moment. At least he’d made the effort.

  “So now that you know, what are you going to do?” she asked.

  He lifted his gaze from the carpet. “Was Dylan in on the secret?”

  “No. He believes the same thing you did.”

  Suspicion entered his eyes. “What about Cheyenne?”

  Presley thought of the favor he was about to do her sister and prayed her answer would be credible enough that he wouldn’t
change his mind. “I didn’t tell anyone.”

  He shot to his feet. “Bullshit!”

  Presley felt terrible that she wasn’t better able to defend Cheyenne’s interests, but nothing she said would convince Aaron now. She and Chey were too close. “You’re right. But...she wanted to tell you. She begged me to do it.”

  “Before or after she asked me to donate sperm? Neither of you cared that I would have two children?” He rubbed a hand across his face. “Shit. For someone who’s always been so careful about birth control, now I’m fathering babies all over the place.”

  Wyatt wriggled out of her lap and went over to get his bat. “You won’t have two children, Aaron,” she said. “Dylan and Cheyenne will have one, and I’ll have the other—with whoever I eventually marry.”

  His eyes narrowed, so she tried to win him over, to bring about the solution she’d held in reserve against this day. “You could sign away your parental rights. Then you’ll have no responsibility for Wyatt. None.”

  “Oh, and that’s such a tempting offer.”

  She hadn’t expected him to be so sarcastic. “You’ll be free to move on, to relocate and live your life as you see fit, a single man with no responsibilities.”

  “I understood what you were offering the first time,” he said.

  “Why does it make you so mad?”

  “You think, now that I know, I could do that?”

  Her pulse, which had begun to race when she first saw him, spiked again. Aaron might have softened somewhat, but this was not going as she’d hoped.

  “Why not?” she asked. “You could always have a family later, when you’re ready. With a quick signature, there’d be nothing lingering in your past that you’d have to worry about. No one who could lay any claim on you.”

  A muscle moved in his cheek; he was struggling with as much emotion as she was. “While someone like Riley raised my son.”

  “Maybe. Him or someone else.” Taking a deep breath, she got to her feet. She had to persuade him. It felt as if she was fighting for her life—and in a way she was. She was fighting for life as she knew it, where she had full custody and control of her child. “I have the form in my bedroom. I’ll get it.”

  He didn’t protest, but when she came back, his lip curled. “You just happened to have that handy?”

  She put it in front of him and handed him the pen she’d also retrieved. “I’ve considered telling you before.”

  “So you got prepared, just in case.”

  “Wyatt means the world to me,” she said softly.

  When he didn’t respond, she pushed a little harder. “I’ll take good care of him, Aaron. I promise. Whether I ever marry or not, you won’t have to worry about me hitting you up for support. You’ve seen how hard I’m working, what I’ve done to change my life.”

  He tossed the pen onto the document without signing it. “Yeah, I’ve seen how you cut me out of it. I guess this is where I’m supposed to thank you for that, too, huh?”

  “It’s what you wanted!”

  He was leaving. Why? She couldn’t let him go. She had to have some reassurance, even a hint, that he wouldn’t threaten to take Wyatt away from her.

  “Aaron?” As she followed him to the door, she managed to hold fresh tears at bay, but it was all she could do not to plead with him to understand, to move on as if Wyatt had never been born. She would have resorted to begging if she’d thought it would help. “What are you going to do?”

  “Beats the hell out of me.” He paused long enough to look back at Wyatt. Then he shook his head and slammed the door behind him.

  * * *

  “What’s wrong?”

  Cheyenne had heard the tears in her voice. Presley would’ve preferred to make this call once she’d pulled herself together, but she couldn’t allow her sister to be blindsided. For all she knew, Aaron was on his way to their place right now. “Are you alone?”

  “Not quite but...give me a minute.”

  Presley heard some rustling, then the sound of a door closing. When her sister spoke again, there was an echo, as if she’d just locked herself in the bathroom. “What’s going on?”

  “He knows.”

  “Who knows? Not Dylan. He seems fine....”

  “Aaron!”

  “About Wyatt?” She was whispering, but her voice rose in spite of that.

  Hot tears rolled down Presley’s cheeks. “Yes.”

  “No! How did he find out? You didn’t tell him....”

  “He guessed. He was waiting here for me when I got home from work.”

  Silence fell, a silence that stretched for several seconds. Then Cheyenne said, “Are you okay?”

  “I’m sick to my stomach.”

  “I can understand why. How’d he take the news?”

  “Pretty much as we expected.” She blew her nose and dried her eyes. “He’s not happy. He feels cheated and betrayed, by both of us.”

  Cheyenne let out a small squeal of alarm. “You told him I knew Wyatt was his?”

  “I told him you didn’t know, but he didn’t believe me. I’m sorry.”

  She groaned. “I was afraid this wasn’t going to end well. Now Dylan will find out I’ve been lying to him about Wyatt, too.”

  “You’re going to lie to him about something much bigger.”

  “That’s for his own good. This can’t be construed the same way. This was for you. I put you above him.”

  Presley slumped on the couch. Wyatt was playing with his blocks in the middle of the floor, but he could tell that something was wrong. He kept coming over to pat her leg before wandering off again. “It was a mistake for me to move back to Whiskey Creek,” she said. “I should’ve waited. But I didn’t think it would make any difference. In the two years I was gone, Aaron didn’t try to contact me once.”

  “Actually...” Cheyenne cleared her throat.

  “What?”

  “He asked for your number a few times. Maybe...several times.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Why would I? You were doing so well. I didn’t want to weaken your resolve. And he could’ve tried a lot harder. He would have if he’d really wanted to reach you.”

  Stung that Cheyenne had kept this from her, Presley sat up. He’d let her go so easily, and that had been a painful thing to cope with.

  But she might’ve settled for continuing the relationship if she’d known. Maybe Cheyenne had done her a favor. Aaron cared. He’d told her he cared. He’d just never cared enough. “Either way, I thought he was relieved to be rid of me, that he wouldn’t pay any attention to the fact that I was back. I never dreamed he’d fight for our...friendship.”

  “I don’t mean to be rude, Pres, but I think he’s bored with the women he’s been seeing. Noelle’s not exactly good company. And you’ve been trying to keep away from him, so you’re a new challenge.”

  Presley dropped her head in her hands. She’d brought that up before, but... “That’s not very flattering to either of us, Chey. It makes him look shallow and me like an infatuated fool.”

  Her sister didn’t respond immediately. “I shouldn’t have said it. I just don’t want to see you get hurt again.”

  Presley didn’t want to be hurt. She’d barely been able to navigate the dark labyrinth of the past two years; she definitely didn’t want to start that journey over.

  “Thanks. I think.” She didn’t believe Cheyenne truly understood what it was like when she was in Aaron’s arms. The way it felt as if she mattered so much more to him than she really did. But what was the use of insisting she wasn’t merely a challenge to Aaron? She had to accept the fact that they were never going to be together.

  Cheyenne quickly steered the conversation into safer territory.

  “I still don’t understa
nd how he guessed about Wyatt.”

  “All it took was for someone to point out the similarities,” she said. “Then it clicked, and something he’d never thought to question seemed obvious. I would’ve tried harder to convince him he was wrong, but he could prove the truth too easily.”

  “He plans on getting a paternity test?”

  “That’s what he says.”

  “He wouldn’t go that far unless he really wants to know.”

  “Apparently, he does. Aaron might have his flaws, but he’s not afraid of facing a challenge.”

  “Does that mean he plans to participate in Wyatt’s life?”

  “I can only guess it does. I gave him the chance to sign away his rights, told him if he did, Wyatt and I would never bother him again.”

  “And?”

  “He didn’t take it.”

  Presley waited for her sister to digest this information. “So where’d you leave it?” she asked at length.

  “Up in the air.”

  “Just a minute...”

  Presley could tell by her sister’s inflection that this was a separate concern. “What is it?”

  “He’s here—Aaron’s here.” Her next words came as a whisper. “You don’t think he’ll tell Dylan about the artificial insemination, do you? Just to get back at us?”

  “He’s not vindictive enough to do something like that out of spite or...revenge. But even if he does, we haven’t performed the insemination yet, so Dylan can’t get too mad.”

  “Aaron could tell Dylan I’m not pregnant.”

  Presley jumped to her feet. “Dylan thinks you’re already pregnant?”

  “That’s why I tried to call you earlier,” she said. “But never mind that right now. I’ve got to go.”

  There was no chance to say anything else. Her sister was gone.

  19

  As Aaron stood on Dylan’s front stoop, asking his brother if he had a second to talk, he could see Cheyenne hovering in the background, near the kitchen. It wasn’t hard to see that she was nervous. But he couldn’t bring himself to say or do anything to relieve her anxiety. While he understood that her loyalty to Presley would be stronger than her loyalty to him, this wasn’t a small matter. They were talking about a child. His child. She’d kept Wyatt’s paternity a secret from him for two years. And she’d had the nerve to come to him when she needed help, to tell him she trusted him more than anyone else. How did she expect that to make him feel?