Shielder — A new Science Fiction Romance (Book 1, Shielder Series)
Page 15
"Hmmm, very interesting. Pretty dirty in there."
Dirty? She scrubbed her ears whenever she took a shower. She turned to glare at him, but he deftly moved to her other side and held her head still while he examined the second ear.
"Wow. This one's even dirtier. And not a lanrax in sight." He grinned broadly and winked at Brand, who quickly averted his eyes. A soft giggle escaped Raven. Chase was teasing, trying to put the children at ease. She'd never seen him really smile. His face lit up, his eyes glowed, and he looked incredibly handsome. Her breath hitched.
"I need to check your throat. Open wide."
Resigned, she allowed him to shine a light into her mouth. "I can see your dinner from last night, all the way down in your stomach," he declared solemnly. "You had bread and cheese." That seemed to catch Brand's attention. Even though Nessa knew it was just an educated guess, she found Chase's act charming. It revealed a side to him she hadn't known existed.
"Time to lie down now." Before she could react, he swung her legs onto the bunk and pushed her onto her back. "I'm going to press on you in a few places, to see if you've swallowed any weapons lately."
Raven smiled outright at that, and Nessa found it pretty funny, until Chase ran his hands over her breasts. Her breath caught, and a rush of sensations flooded her body. He watched her, his eyes darkening with a predatory gleam.
"Nothing there—at least, no weapons," he said, his voice deeper. He slid his hands lower and gently pressed his fingers down her abdomen, coming alarmingly close to the apex of her thighs. "Is it sore…anywhere?" he asked softly.
Searing heat flowed through her lower body, reminding her of last night, in the shower.
With a gasp, Nessa grabbed his wrists. Her eyes locked with his as a startling current flowed between them. She wanted to insist that he move his hands, to tell him he was hurting her; say anything to stop his touch, to stop the swiftly rising desire.
But the warning in his eyes reminded her of the children and their fears. She realized, even as his presence threatened her on a number of levels, that he meant the children no harm. He appeared to possess a surprising amount of medical knowledge, knowledge that had benefitted her and would help the children. Forcing the breath from her lungs, she relinquished her grip on his wrists.
Approval flashed in his eyes. "Nothing there, either." He removed his hands. "You're done. You were very good." He reached toward a plate of caroba she hadn't noticed until now. "Here." Taking advantage of her surprise, he shoved a piece of caroba into her mouth, then turned to Raven.
"Since Brand still seems a little nervous about this, why don't you go next?" He offered his hand to the girl.
She looked at Nessa uncertainly. Nessa nodded reassuringly. "It's okay, Raven. Captain McKnight won't hurt you. I'll sit next to you while he checks you."
Hesitant still, Raven climbed onto the bunk, holding her blanket tightly. Her fears were quickly calmed by Chase's soothing and kind manner. She even giggled when he announced with great amazement that she had a kerani in her right ear. That earned her a piece of caroba, which she had apparently never had, judging from the rapt expression on her face when she tasted it. She willingly lay down for the physical part of the examination.
Nessa watched Chase's hands moving gently over the girl. They were beautiful hands, strong, yet able to comfort with their touch. Able to stir all kinds of sensations…. She had to forget about what had passed between them. With a great effort, she forced herself to concentrate on the questions Chase was asking Raven, and the girl's diffident replies.
"Do you know how old you are, Raven?"
"Twelve seasons, master, I think."
"Have you started your menses yet?"
Raven appeared baffled by his question. "What, Master?"
"Your cycle, the flow of blood once a month." He paused, observing her confused look. "Probably not. Don't worry about it right now. There, we're done. And you're in good shape. You get another piece of caroba."
Raven crouched by the bunk again, slowly eating her treat. Chase offered his hand to Brand. "It's your turn." Shaking his head, Brand scrabbled into the corner of the bunk.
Chase picked up a piece of caroba. "Tell you what, Brand. I'll give you this so you can taste it and see if you like it. When you want more, you let me know. Then I get to check you out, and you get more caroba." He placed the treat in the boy's hand.
Nessa was touched by his patience and understanding with the children, with his caroba rewards for their cooperation. There would have been no tolerance of such behavior, even with good cause, in a Shielder colony. How odd that Chase, a shadower, a member of a group infamous for ruthless actions, showed such compassion.
He rose from the bunk. "We'll have the morning meal in a little while. But first, Nessa and I need to talk." He indicated a package on the shelves. "Those are your new tunics. Put one on and join me in the cockpit."
He gathered his medical equipment, then much to her disappointment, retrieved the plate of caroba before he left. She could have used it to fortify herself for the coming confrontation, having no delusions as to the nature of the discussion.
She retrieved the package from the shelf, once again astonished at the generosity her new acquaintances had shown her. After going seasons without luxuries of any kind, to receive several offerings within a ship's cycle seemed overwhelming.
The package contained two tunics, one a deep, rich brown and the other a forest green color. Nessa knew instinctively they would complement her coloring. She fingered the cloth, much softer than her pilgrim's tunic. Why had Chase purchased such fine quality clothing for her? She'd needed another tunic desperately, but he could have gotten something a lot less expensive.
No use second guessing him. Picking the brown tunic, she headed for the lav, where she found the silver lanrax curled mournfully in the sink. "Poor little creature," she told it, even though it hissed at her intrusion. "You would love to be close to Captain McKnight, while I'd like to stay as far away from him as possible."
But as the memory of last night resurfaced, she knew that wasn't entirely true.
* * * *
Chase was entering navigational commands when she entered the cockpit. She waited quietly while he finished, dismayed to realize they had departed Elysia and she hadn't even been aware of it. Now she could only hope their destination had been set for Star Base Intrepid. She didn't know if he would allow her further access to the computer, so she'd have to wait to check the destination screen secretly.
After a few moments, he swiveled around, his expression hard. The man who'd just gentled two terrified children had reverted back to the ruthless shadower.
"Would you care to offer an explanation as to why you so blatantly defied my orders yesterday?"
Nessa forced herself to look into his eyes. "It wasn't my intention to defy orders, Captain. I only wanted to find transport to Zirak. The time before the eclipse is growing short."
"As is my patience. Twice now, you've given your word that you would obey orders, and both times you failed to do so. Are you a liar, perhaps?"
Irrational anger flared at his blunt accusation. After all, she had lied about virtually everything. To a Shielder, honor came before all else, yet Nessa knew her falsehoods were justified. "Not a liar, Captain. Just desperate. My people have sacrificed much for me to be able to participate in the ceremony of the eclipse."
"And was it desperation that led you to buy those children—or did you act solely on impulse? Did you even plan any further than buying Raven and Brand and bringing them on board my ship?"
She refused to admit her action might have been rash. "I planned on taking the children with me to Zirak. Then we could return to…Delsan together. My people will accept them." Chase had her so shaken, she'd almost forgotten her story. She warned herself to tread carefully.
"But now you have no money. How do you propose to earn transport passage for three people? And not only to Zirak, but home from there."
Realizing she had her hands clenched together, a dead giveaway of her tension, Nessa forced them to her side. "I don't know. But I couldn't leave those children on Slaver's Square. I just couldn't. So punish me if you will, but don't take it out on them. I'll do whatever it takes to earn our passage. Anything you want me to do—cleaning, inventory, computer research, navigation. Anything."
His brows shot up. "Anything?"
Embarrassment set her face on fire. At the same time, pain jolted her heart. She'd known their mating was a mistake, but to think it might be in payment of her debt to Chase wounded deeply. She could work in a Pleasure Dome if that were the case, except no one there would want her services.
But pride insisted she see this painful situation through. Determined Chase would never know her true feelings, Nessa drew a deep breath. "I'll do whatever is necessary for my survival and the survival of those children."
He scowled, apparently not happy with her answer. "I'll remember that." He spun the seat back around and punched some pads.
It suddenly occurred to her that if Chase truly considered her his slave, he would see no reason to pay her for whatever services she performed. Desperation twisted her insides.
"What about the children?" she asked.
"What about them?"
"What are you planning to do with them? Will you allow them to go with me?"
His shoulders tensed. "I haven't decided yet."
"But what would you do with them? How could you properly care for them, leading the life of a—of a…." She halted, appalled at what she'd almost said.
"A shadower?" he finished for her. "You should have thought of that before you so rashly purchased them."
Oh, Spirit, he meant to take them from her. Already, she felt an inexplicable bond with the children. They needed her. And she needed them. Not only that, but they were Shielders. If he ever found out the truth…Her leg buckled, forcing her to grab the console for support.
Chase turned around. "For Spirit's sake, sit down before you fall down."
She complied. "The children, are they all right?"
He nodded grudgingly. "They appear to be in good health, although I need to examine Brand more closely. From their general condition, I'd say they hadn't been slaves very long, half a season, perhaps."
Even half a season seemed far too long to Nessa. "Why can't Brand speak? Raven said he used to talk."
"It's probably not a physical condition, but a psychological one, caused by trauma. Hopefully, when he begins to feel safe, when the memories start to fade, he'll talk again."
Nessa leaned forward anxiously. She remembered so little about taking care of children. "How can we reassure him that he's safe with us?"
"By our actions. With patience and kindness, a lot of affection and a lot of touching. We need to hold and hug the children as much as possible."
His statement seemed odd to her. Not just because he was a shadower, but because Shielders did not customarily show much affection toward one another. "Why touching?"
Pensive, Chase stared toward the starboard portal. "Because human touch is healing. Even with the medical advances of our age, nothing can surpass the power of loving, physical contact."
Physical contact. Nessa had certainly learned how electrifying that could be. She cleared her throat. "Is Raven okay?"
"Physically, she's fine. Emotionally, she appears to be dealing with her slavery experience better than Brand, although we might see signs of delayed post-traumatic stress. From her physical development, I suspect she'll be entering the transition into womanhood soon. She's going to need a mother figure. Someone to explain menses, to prepare her for the changes she'll go through."
A sudden memory bombarded Nessa, the memory of when her own cycle had started. She'd been terrified, because she had no idea what was happening to her body. She'd been alone, without parents for more than a season when that happened. Jarek had been the one to explain she wasn't dying, only growing up.
She vowed to herself that wouldn't happen to Raven. "I'll take care of Raven. I'll explain everything to her."
Chase steepled his fingers beneath his chin. "You're barely out of childhood yourself. What do you know about being a mother?"
She never would know—at least not as a biological mother. The painful reminder blazed through her. "Giving physical birth to a child doesn't automatically make a woman a good mother," she retorted, battling the ever-present bitterness from her own mother's desertion. "I do understand children. I used to take care of the younger ones in our clan, until—" The overwhelming memories kept her from continuing, and she bit her lip.
"Until your injury." He watched her, a wealth of understanding in his eyes.
She looked away. She preferred his anger over his pity. "Please, let me help care for Raven and Brand. I'll talk with Raven about the coming changes, and look for some information she can read on the computer."
He considered a moment. "All right. But understand this, Nessa. If you overstep your bounds one more time, your time will be spent in the brig."
Rising, he pulled her from her seat. "Come on. We're going to the galley. I'm going to show you how to operate the food replicator. I'm assigning you all galley duties—cooking and clean up. Then, after the morning meal, you can take the portable sterilizer and disinfect the ship. No telling what microorganisms you and the children tracked in, and I don't know if the air filtration system will catch it all."
So her duties were beginning. Nessa wondered just how far those duties would go, especially tonight. Anticipation hummed through her body. Shocked, she forced all thoughts of last night from her mind.
She was a Shielder, with a crucial mission to complete. She couldn't entertain a physical attraction for anyone, much less a shadower.
* * * *
Operating a food replicator proved to be a fairly simple process, and Nessa learned the basics quickly. Within half an hour, she was able to produce simple items like bread, cheese, and a dark tea Chase liked. Learning the program codes for the numerous other items the replicator could create would take a little more time.
They brought the children into the galley for the meal. Chase wanted them to become comfortable moving around the ship instead of burrowing in Nessa's cabin like frightened animals.
Before the children left the cabin, he fashioned makeshift tunics out of their blankets. He made Brand's first, cutting a hole for his head, then slipping the blanket on poncho style and tying it at the little boy's waist with a piece of cord. He did the same for Raven.
In the galley, Brand huddled on the bench, eating very little. Chase wrapped his leftovers in a napkin for him. "This is your food," he told Brand, "You can take it with you, and eat whenever you want. But I expect you to begin eating more during our meals in the galley, okay?"
Observing this, Raven picked daintily at her food, then eyed Chase expectantly. "Oh, do you want me to do the same for you, Miss Raven?" She nodded shyly, and he complied, earning a small smile.
Watching him with the children, Nessa felt a tightness in her throat. He seemed to understand their fears and insecurities and went out of his way to assuage them.
Chase explained to the children that he expected them to spend the morning shift with him or Nessa, not in their cabin. Raven seemed to have attached herself to Nessa, clinging to her tunic and following behind like a shadow. But when Chase gently picked up the shaking Brand to go to the cockpit, Raven darted after them. She watched over Brand just like Jarek had watched over her, Nessa thought with a pang.
She cleaned the galley, then lugged the sterilizer from the supply room. Chase came into the corridor to show her how to operate the unit.
"Here's where you turn it on," he explained. "Aim this nozzle at the floor, ceiling, walls, all surfaces. It sprays an antibacterial mist that dries instantly. Do every part of the ship, except the cockpit, decontamination, and the laboratory. They have built-in sterilizing systems."
It took almost two hours for Nessa to compl
ete her assignment. When she returned to the cockpit, Brand lay curled in Chase's lap, sound asleep. Raven was in a rear jump seat, her feet dangling a good foot from the floor. As Nessa approached, she saw the girl had also fallen asleep, her head sagging sideways.
"I was trying to show them the different controls and how they worked," Chase admitted wryly. "As you can see, they found me fascinating."
Nessa nodded toward Brand. "How did you get him in your lap? He won't come to me."
"I told him one of his duties was being a lap warmer. I still had to lift him up here. He's not ready to make any advances on his own."
Her heart softening dangerously, Nessa leaned down to study Raven. She noted the dark circles beneath the girl's eyes and strong maternal instincts surged through her. She had the overpowering urge to wrap her arms around Raven and rock the fragile girl until she felt safe.
Surprised by her strong reaction, she jerked her head up to find Chase's discerning gaze upon her. Her emotions all jumbled, she felt her face grow flushed. She straightened. "What else do you want me to do?"
He leaned back in his seat, shifting Brand. "Contact the computer at the sector Controller base on Odera and download the latest location reports on wanted offenders. It will take some time. The communication link codes are in the Odera file."
The one computer assignment she couldn't possibly enjoy, not knowing Shielder names would probably be in the downloaded file. Nessa went to her seat and began the process.
A while later, as she sat waiting for the transfer to be completed, she heard the soft padding of small feet. A sleepy-eyed Raven stood beside her seat, watching silently. Remembering Chase's recommendation, Nessa patted the space beside her. "Come sit with me."
Raven moved closer, then hesitated. Reaching out, Nessa gathered the girl into the seat with her. She kept her arm around Raven, explaining how the computer worked. When the download was completed, Nessa glanced over at Chase. He seemed occupied, so she quickly checked the destination screen that read: Destination: Star Base Intrepid.