Redemption (Book 4, The Redemption Series)

by S. J. West

  “If you want them off so badly,” he tells me, “why don’t you take them off yourself?”

  I’ve never been one to turn away from a challenge. I walk over to Malcolm and kneel down in front of him. In one swift motion, I yank his briefs down with one hand and take hold of his erection with the other. I hear Malcolm’s rapid intake of breath as my fingers begin to manipulate the tip of him. When I look up into his face, I see that he’s watching me with hooded eyes. His lips are parted and his breathing is noticeably more labored.

  “How strong do your legs feel?” I ask him.

  It’s the exact same question he asked me the last time we were in this house.

  “Very strong. What do you have in mind?” he replies, repeating the answer I gave him back then.

  “Just try to remain standing,” I say, letting him know that two can play at the little game of pleasure he performed on me that day.

  Malcolm proves to be less able to stand and take my manipulation of his body than I was. After only a few short minutes of pleasuring him, he lifts me into his arms in one quick movement. I wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck as he holds my bottom in the palms of his hands. He enters me in one swift motion, causing me to cry out from the intense pleasure.

  “Anna,” he groans, lightly biting the side of my neck, “use the bracelet. I want you to feel what I’m feeling. Please, my love. Use it.”

  As Malcolm begins to move inside me, I lose all the reasons why I was resisting his pleas for me to use the bracelet on him in the first place.

  I ask the bracelet to tell me what he’s feeling.

  I tighten my hold around his neck because the emotions I’m feeling from Malcolm, mixed with my own in that moment, are so intense I begin to cry.

  His desire for me is undeniable. It’s not only because of the physical proof of his want inside me, but also because I can feel the overwhelming energy of his love flow from his heart into mine. In the past, sex was just a way to help him pass the time while he waited for Caylin’s descendant to be born. But making love with me has been an experience beyond just physical gratification. When our bodies are connected the way they are now, he feels love, desire, hope, and peace. His love for me runs so deep he can’t imagine living without me. His desire for me isn’t only for my body but also for my ability to remain strong against adversity. He has hope that our future will be filled with children and laughter, and the fact that someone like me can love a man with such a sordid past like his brings him peace.

  Malcolm groans against my neck, and I know he’s about to reach the height of our lovemaking. When I feel him lose control both physically and emotionally, I cry out his name as he propels me over the edge of reason to find my own ecstasy.

  Chapter 13

  I hold onto Malcolm afterwards because I can’t seem to make myself let him go. My body is trembling uncontrollably, and my heart feels like there’s a war raging inside about to tear it to pieces. Malcolm’s love for me has tempered my fury for the moment, but I still feel like I’m on the verge of losing control of who I am.

  The way I spoke to Malcolm earlier shames me to the core. How could I have said those horrible things to him and actually meant them? I feel like there are two versions of me now. It's as if the part of my soul filled with all of my hatred and contempt is chasing after the part that holds my love and compassion. In Alto, my darker side caught up to my lighter side, almost destroying it. But Malcolm’s love and refusal to let me go tipped the balance back. I know the race for my soul isn’t over yet. I can’t shake the feeling that it’s only a matter of time before the darkness inside me proves victorious. Maybe Helena is right. Perhaps we are more alike than I want to admit.

  “Anna,” Malcolm says as he slowly trails kisses down my right shoulder. “Are you with me again?”

  I loosen my hold around Malcolm’s neck enough to lean back and look him in the eyes.

  All I want to do is permanently wipe away the worry I see on his face. I lean in and kiss him on the lips gently, lovingly.

  “I’m better,” I say to him, not completely sure I’m telling him the truth, but I know it’s what he wants to hear from me.

  My words don’t erase the concern from Malcolm’s eyes, but he nods as if he accepts what I’ve said, at least for now.

  I feel an intense stinging sensation in the middle of my back and immediately lower my legs from around Malcolm’s waist. I bring my arms down from around his neck and press them against the ache I feel.

  I turn so my back is facing Malcolm.

  “Do you see Baal’s seal?” I ask him, assuming its presence is causing the pain.

  Malcolm traces the circular pattern of the seal on my back with the tips of his fingers, easing the ache it’s generating.

  “Yes,” he says, not sounding at all happy about the fact, “it’s there.”

  I turn back around to face Malcolm.

  “What does his seal mean?”

  Malcolm looks me in the eyes and says, “Torment.”

  It seems like a fitting term to describe the way I feel, tormented in both body and soul.

  “Well, at least I know Baal actually gave me his seal, unlike what happened with Belphagor. What I don’t understand is why he thought I would be weakened so much by it that Mammon would be able to kill me without a fight.”

  “What do you mean?” Malcolm asks.

  “Right before Baal set off the explosives to damage Alto’s propulsion systems, he said whatever they did should have worked. That I should have been knocked out by it.”

  “What was different this time?” Malcolm asks. “Could you feel what they did?”

  “All I know is that the pain was the worst that I’ve felt so far. Do you think it’s because it’s the fourth seal I’ve absorbed? Will the pain just get increasingly worse every time?”

  Malcolm shakes his head. “I don’t know, my love. That could be the reason, but I can’t say for sure. All I am certain of is that you’re far more powerful now than you were before. I don’t think you could have saved the city this morning before Baal gave you his seal.”

  “No,” I say, “I know I couldn’t have. I just don’t understand why they would betray a deal they set up themselves. It doesn’t make much sense. They have to know I'll be out for their blood now.”

  “They obviously thought it would be safer for them if you were dead,” Malcolm says. “You’re becoming extremely formidable. I would say you’re probably the most powerful person on the planet right now, Anna. There’s no telling what you’re capable of.”

  “And that scares me,” I admit, feeling almost frightened of myself. “I don’t know what I’m able to do now either, Malcolm.”

  “I think you can accomplish a lot of good,” Malcolm says, placing his hands on my shoulders.

  “Right now, I just want to find Millie and Lucas.”

  “I don’t think they’ll hurt them,” Malcolm reassures me. “Their lives are the only things keeping you from ripping Baal and Mammon apart right now.”

  I wrap my arms around Malcolm’s waist and rest my head against his bare chest. The steady beating of his heart and his warmth bring me some much-needed peace.

  “Is it wrong of me to not want to leave just yet?” I ask, closing my eyes as if such an action could stop time and allow us just one moment of calm.

  “No, it isn’t wrong,” Malcolm reassures me, hugging me close. “If I had my way, I would keep you here naked all the time to act as my own personal sex slave.”

  I laugh and look up at Malcolm.

  “Oh really? Didn’t you just admit that I’m the most powerful person on the planet right now? I think it’s you who would be the sex slave, not me.”

  “Oh, all right,” Malcolm sighs heavily, as if he’s begrudgingly accepting his fate, “if I must. I’m willing to sacrifice my body to the cause of keeping you happy and satisfied.”

  I lean up and kiss Malcolm, luxuriating in the sweet taste of his mouth and the sof
t, yet firm play of his tongue against mine. I know we have to leave soon, but I need this moment to help keep me sane through what has to be done next. I seriously doubt finding Millie and Lucas will be easy. The odds of Baal and Mammon just handing them back over to us are practically non-existent. But Malcolm is right about one thing. They have to know the lives of my loved ones are the only reasons I won’t completely obliterate them from reality the next time I see them.

  While we’re putting our clothes back on, I begin to think about the man I saw at the wedding. For some reason, I can’t seem to get the picture of his face out of my head.

  “Malcolm,” I say, letting the magnetic closure on the back of my dress pull itself together, “there was a man at the wedding staring at me.”

  Malcolm chuckles softly. “There were a lot of men staring at you today, my love. Which one in particular caught your eye and should I feel jealous?”

  “Absolutely not,” I assure him. “He was handsome, but that wasn’t what drew my attention to him. I’ve seen him before. He was at the wedding celebration Lorcan had in Stratus. That night I noticed him in the crowd right before Lorcan and I fought. He was staring at me then, and he was staring at me again today while Brutus and Kyna were exchanging their vows.”

  “Maybe he’s a friend of Kyna’s,” Malcolm suggests, zipping up his pants. He turns around to walk into the other room where his shirt and jacket are still lying on the floor. I almost wish he wouldn’t put them back on because the sight of him only partially unclothed is far more pleasurable to me.

  “If he was her friend, why would he leave while everyone stood to applaud them after the ceremony? Seems like he would have stuck around to wish her well.”

  Malcolm walks back into the room with his shirt on but left completely open. I assume the reason is because it’s missing a lot buttons from the way he ripped it off himself earlier. He has his jacket slung over his shoulder, holding it loosely by an index finger.

  “I don’t have an explanation for his early departure,” Malcolm answers. “Why are you letting him bother you so much?”

  “I’m not sure,” I reply. “But there’s something about him that seems familiar. I just don’t know why. I thought I would mention him to you in case I see him again. If I do, I’ll try to point him out. Maybe you’ll recognize him.”

  “If he ends up being a stalker,” Malcolm says, wrapping his free arm around my waist and pulling me against him possessively. “Do I have your permission to rearrange his face?”

  “But it’s such a pretty face,” I tease, earning an almost jealous look from Malcolm.

  “Then I take that as a yes,” Malcolm says, kissing me as if his lips are burning a brand on them, claiming me as his forever.

  When Malcolm lifts his head, he smiles down at me.

  “Just so you know, I do have a green-eyed monster lurking inside me,” he says. “And it’s quite violent and protective.”

  “No need to be jealous,” I tell him, “because I’m all yours.”

  “Good,” Malcolm replies, his smile broadening. “I’m glad we can agree on that.”

  Malcolm phases us to our bedroom back home. I quickly change out of my dress and into my white leather outfit and strap my sword back on. I silently thank Linn for cleaning my outfit for me the day before. She was such a great help and never asked to be thanked for all she has done for us since Millie and Lucas’ abduction. I’m not sure what I would have done without her help and friendship.

  Malcolm changes into a simple white t-shirt and jeans. Both fit him rather snugly, accentuating the best aspects of his body. After he slips on some plain black loafers, we make our way downstairs to find the others. We need to know if the search for Lucas has produced any leads. I know it’s wishful thinking on my part to hope to find Lucas waiting for us in the sitting room, but I send up a silent prayer anyway asking for such a miracle.

  As we approach the entrance to the sitting room, I hear Lucifer say, “Nothing good can come of this. I say we open it ourselves and see what’s inside before she even gets here.”

  After Malcolm and I enter the room, all eyes turn to us, and no one has time to say another word.

  Lucifer is standing in front of Christopher with Jered, Daniel, and Desmond around them. They all have worried expressions on their faces and I soon discover why.

  I stop dead in my tracks when I see what Christopher is holding in his hands.

  It’s a medium sized white box tied with a red, silky ribbon.

  My heart begins to pound inside my chest, and I can hear my own breathing become ragged as my lungs burn for oxygen.

  Lucifer steps in front of the box Christopher is holding to block my view of it.

  “Anna,” he says, “just walk away and let us handle this.”

  “I may not agree with him often,” Jered says, coming to stand next to Lucifer presenting a united front, “but he’s right. Malcolm, take Anna somewhere else for a while and let us deal with what’s inside the box.”

  “No,” I say in a low, controlled voice. I can feel my hands begin to tremble at my sides as I stare at Lucifer and Jered. “I am not leaving until I know what’s in there.”

  “Anna,” Jered says, taking a step forward, “you remember what happened the last time you opened a box like this.”

  Of course I remembered. I found Vala’s severed head in the box Christopher brought me from Levi. Jered was with me when I opened it. It was a moment I would never forget.

  “Who is the box from Christopher?” I ask but already know who the gift is from. I just want him to confirm it.

  Christopher meets my gaze and hesitates before answering, “Levi. He had it prepared for me to bring to you when I returned to him a few minutes ago. He told me not to bother coming back to Cirrus. Apparently, the information I overheard about Lucas’ whereabouts was fake. It was a test to see if I would report it to Lucifer and prove that I was still loyal to him.”

  My heart feels like it might collapse in on itself with this news, even before I’ve opened the box. Lucifer's words as I entered the room were right. Nothing good can be inside what Christopher is holding. Considering the gift giver, all I expect to find is pain.

  “Anna,” Malcolm says, taking hold of my hand closest to him. “Let’s go. Lucifer and the others can handle this.”

  I snatch my hand out of Malcolm’s, feeling on the verge of shouting words I might regret later. But I hold my tongue and walk over to Lucifer and Jered.

  “Move,” I order them.

  Both men hesitate but they each step aside, leaving Christopher standing before me with the box still grasped between his hands.

  I lift a trembling hand to the ribbon and pull one end of it. The red silk falls from the box and onto the floor at my feet. With both of my hands, I grasp the lid and lift it off. Inside the box, I find a piece of black velvet covering something round. A white piece of paper folded on top of it has my name written in Levi’s hand. I open the letter to read what’s printed on the inside.

  I hope you appreciate my gift to you, my little dove. I went to a lot of trouble to find it. If you want to thank me in person, you can find me where we first met.

  Levi

  I let the letter fall from my now numb fingers onto the floor. I force myself to look back inside the box. My heart is beating so fast now all I can hear is the rush of my own blood pumping. I reach a hand back into the box and grab a corner of the fabric. Before I lose my nerve, I yank the velvet off Levi’s gift to me.

  I hear myself scream hysterically but know the sound is simply trapped inside my mind. In reality, my body is completely frozen into place. I can’t move a single muscle. I can’t draw air into my lungs to even take a breath. All I can do is stare at Millie’s head lying inside the box. Her open eyes are vacant of life and slack with death. The scorched marks around the ragged edges of her neck tell me exactly what Levi used to separate her head from her body.

  As I look at what’s left of Millie, all I can do is st
and there and silently scream.

  Images of my life with her quickly flash through my mind. I can remember turning to her for comfort countless times as a child and always being welcomed with open arms. I knew Millie loved me just as protectively and fiercely as any mother would have. She proved her love to me in countless ways. The most important of which was by spending time with me and making me feel important. Not only did she play with me because I wasn’t allowed to play with other children, but she also read books to help me escape to other worlds for a time. She was a friend and confidante to a lonely child. Millie was never just a maid in our home. She was family, and had been a constant in my life for as long as I could remember. Now, she’s gone. Her life has been stolen from her by a mad man who no longer deserves to live.

  I close my eyes against the gruesome display of Levi’s sadism. I’m faintly aware of Malcolm taking me into his arms, holding me like he thinks it will ease my pain. He begs me to not let my anger grab hold of my heart again...but he’s too late. He worked a small miracle by being able to pull me back with his love earlier, but I know that trick won’t work this time.

  The light inside my heart flickers and burns out, handing victory over my soul to the dark. All I want is revenge. I need to see Levi’s blood cover my hands. I want to feel him writhe beneath me in pain until he begs me to end his wretched life. I don’t intend to make his death a fast or easy one. I want him to feel the same agony and fear Millie felt before he ended her time on Earth so cruelly. I want him to wallow in his own entrails and feel a pain beyond anything anyone in the history of the world has ever felt. He’s plagued my family for far too long. His death has been a long time coming, and the day of reckoning is finally here.

  I don’t even bother to pull out of Malcolm’s embrace or tell him what I’m about to do. I simply phase to Cirrus to find my prey.

  When I reach the ballroom in the palace, I find it empty of Levi’s presence.

  Malcolm phases in right behind me.