Shh!

by Stacey Nash

  His stubble prickled my ear and I shivered again as his voice rumbled against my skin. “Sounds like fun.”

  “Ooh, I need to figure out what to wear.” Savvy bounded toward my door. “Let’s head up at say …” Her eyes rolled up as she probably did some sort of backward math in her head “… nine.”

  “Sure,” I said. That would give us a couple of hours to grab dinner and get organised.

  The door slammed behind her and Logan resumed kissing the most sensitive spot on my neck. It felt so good, I wasn’t sure going out was the right choice. I closed my eyes and tipped my head to the side. “We’d better duck out and grab something to eat.”

  Logan didn’t cease his attentions; instead his lips moved across my shoulder until his teeth grazed my earlobe. I moaned and he said, “Let’s just stay in.”

  “Savvy will kill us if we don’t go.”

  “It’ll be worth it.” His hand fanned across my tummy, his long fingers reaching the base of my bra and that was it. The conversation was over.

  ****

  I pulled on my black tights and slipped the red dress Savvy loved to borrow over my head, then tugged on a pair of heeled boots. Logan was still stretched out on my tiny bed, half under the covers.

  “When are you going to get dressed?”

  “Umm …” He puckered his lips, thinking. “When are you going to come back to bed?”

  “It’s already ten past nine. Come on, Romeo, we need to get moving.”

  He didn’t move so much as a finger. “I preferred it when you called me Stalker Boy. Romeo’s a little insulting; that dude married a girl he’d only known for two days. They’d kissed once.”

  “It was love at first sight.”

  Logan groaned and I scooped his jeans off the floor and tossed them at him just as someone rapped on my door. I raised my eyebrows and widened my eyes to hurry him along, even though I would have preferred he stayed naked. Chuckling, he slid the jeans over his hips and the knock sounded again, more insistent.

  “Coming,” I yelled, running a brush through my long hair then reaching for the doorknob. I yanked it open and Savvy stood on the other side, glancing at her watch.

  “We said nine. Oh, for Christ’s sake, Logan, put a shirt on!” The grin on her face negated her disapproving words, and I smiled in response while Savvy tapped her foot impatiently. “Let’s go already.”

  Logan pocketed a bunch of his stuff off my desk and as his keys jangled, Savvy asked, “Are you driving?”

  “Sure.”

  My friend practically bounced down the stairs and we followed. Maybe she’d been drinking already. When we emerged into the courtyard I was surprised to see her join a small group of people. She hadn’t mentioned anything about anyone else coming, but this was Savvy—I should have known better. She gestured in our direction and Molly jogged over to join us. The way she was dressed wasn’t like Molly at all … she looked like she’d just stepped out of Savvy’s wardrobe. With the exception of the Dr Martens boots which looked a little ridiculous coupled with the black and white designer dress which fell mid-thigh. Regardless, it was good she’d managed to keep a little of herself. Sometimes with Savvy that was hard.

  “You’re coming?” Molly asked.

  Glancing over at the group which included Dane, I nodded a little apprehensively. There wasn’t anyone there that I was particularly worried about, but the taunts of last term were still fresh in my mind. “It’s her birthday, of course I’m coming.”

  Molly bumped her fist to my arm. “About time you acted like a college girl. It’ll be fun.”

  “We’re going to drive, you want a lift?”

  Molly glanced back at the group and shrugged. “That’d be great.”

  Logan drove us into town while Savvy chattered non-stop. Apparently Dane coming tonight was a good thing. Logan had offered his mate a ride, but Dane said he’d catch the bus with everyone else and we’d meet up there. This town had a ridiculous number of drinking holes, but tonight we were heading to The Royal. It had a DJ after ten and a small dance floor, plus plenty of places to sit and chat. Perfect, according to the birthday girl.

  As we walked in, Logan snagged my hand in his. The music was already playing, but only as background noise. The lights were low and the air slightly hazy. My friends made a bee-line for the bar and I led Logan toward several tables that had been dragged together that should be big enough once everyone got here.

  I glanced over at the bar; a drink would be nice. I didn’t want to have too much, not after the incident at The University Bar.

  “What do you want to drink?” Logan asked.

  “Umm,” I stalled. “I’ll get something in a minute.”

  He let his fingers drop from mine, and said, “I’ll be back in a bit.”

  I watched him swagger up to the bar. Gosh, I was lucky; not only was he hotter than most Bonds underwear models, Logan was an awesome guy. I’d never had a male best friend before, but I sure felt as close to him as I was to Savvy or Molly. I turned around and took a seat near the end of the table.

  No sooner had I sat than Savvy edged into the seat directly across from me, giggling like a silly schoolgirl as she set down three drinks she’d carried in the triangle of her hands. They were all clear, but I’d bet my last twenty they weren’t water. Molly arrived next with a tray full of shot glasses that she also set on the table. Then she plopped down beside me. “Happy Birthday!” she shouted across the table, sliding a shot to the space in front of Savannah.

  Savvy’s grin spread wide and she squealed, “What is that?”

  “It’s your birthday celebration.” Molly skated another drink along the table which stopped right in front of me.

  “No way,” I said. “I’m not doing any shots. Especially not something … is that green?”

  Molly laughed. “You’ll love it.”

  I’d be sloshed in under ten minutes was more like it.

  “Come on,” Savvy pleaded. “It’s my birthday, and all I want is to drink and dance with my best friend.”

  I pushed the green away. “Your puppy dog eyes aren’t going to work on me.”

  Savvy lifted her cup and took a tentative sniff. “Smells like liquorice.”

  Molly pushed the tiny glass back onto the ring of liquid it had left right in front of me then raised her cup across the table. Savvy’s eyebrow beckoned for me to follow suit, and with a sigh I picked up the sticky glass and clinked it against theirs with a, “Happy Birthday.” Then I tipped my head back and drained the thing in a single gulp. My throat burned, and good lord it tasted nothing like liquorice. The stuff was a vile mix of sugar, liquid fire, and pure alcohol. I slammed the shot glass onto the table and the look on Savvy’s face must have matched my own; horrified. She shoved one of the three glasses of clear liquid toward me and I grabbed it, gulping down the sweet fluid to rid my mouth of the previous horrid taste.

  “You guys are wusses.” Molly laughed. “That stuff is awesome.”

  “If you like setting your throat on fire,” Savvy said.

  The burning spread to my belly, but my throat wasn’t right so I finished off the lemonade Savvy had given me. Logan returned and took a seat by my side, placing a cola in front of himself and something that looked suspiciously like more alcohol in front of me. “Are you guys trying to get me drunk?”

  Molly choked on her drink. “Loosen up, Olivia. It’s not every day Savvy says goodbye to her teens.”

  “Yeah,” Savannah said. “Twenty’s ancient. I’m like … almost an adult. Before you know it, I’ll be all old and wrinkled.”

  “Pfft, you’ll never be old,” I said.

  Our banter was broken by the arrival of the rest of our group. I knew all of them by name, even though we rarely spoke. Most were Savvy’s teaching friends that I’d never really gotten to know beyond the surface. That’s the way it was when you were a friend to everyone. There wasn’t enough time to really know anyone. Savvy must have become friends with them through shared cla
sses. She and I had such different courses, I sometimes wondered how we’d buddied up in O-week last year. I guess it was her epic love of socialising, and my need to be known. I smiled at that while ignoring the familiar spread of warmth through my body as the hellish shot kicked in.

  Savvy’s friends crowded in around her and Logan leaned closer to talk in my ear. “Enjoy yourself. I’m driving, so you don’t need to worry about getting home.”

  “What’s in the drink?” I asked and he gave me one of his crooked smiles.

  “Mostly lemonade.”

  “And …” I coaxed him.

  “Bit of this, bit of that.”

  “Logan,” I warned, eying off the drink which was also green. “It’s not the same poison Molly just made us down is it?”

  “Nope.” He dropped a kiss at the corner of my mouth.

  “Whoa, dude. When did that happen?” Dane’s voice boomed from the other end of the table. “About bloody time!”

  Logan pulled my hand into his and threaded our fingers together. His answer to Dane was no more than a smile. A smile that made me feel as if he was proud of being with me, and damn, if I wasn’t proud of him too. Logan was sweet, and kind, and darn sexy with his unique style. Whenever I was around him I felt like everything was right. I’d never been happier. Here I was with a hunky guy who actually cared about me. Feeling all warm and gooey, I squeezed his hand and took a tiny sip of the drink.

  Good heavens, it was some sort of sweet fruity nectar of the gods. I wasn’t going to get drunk though, so I’d have to sit on this one all night. If it was even alcoholic. It sure didn’t taste it, but who was I kidding, he’d told me to drink up. Leaning back, I eyed up the size of the hourglass-shaped glass—what’d they call that? —I should know, Mum had always encouraged using things’ proper names. My head was a little light, and I had a definite buzz going, but that was okay, I could manage it. Hurricane. That’s what it was called, a hurricane glass. Wait … weren’t they used for cocktails?

  Molly jabbed me in the ribs, and my gaze slipped to her. She gave me a massive grin. “Having fun, sweet cheeks?”

  “Sweet cheeks, Molly? Sometimes you’re crazy.”

  She nodded toward Savvy, who had a collection of glasses on her table space. “Her hand’s empty. We should get her another drink.”

  I frowned. “No more green hellfire.”

  Molly jumped out of her chair and beckoned me to follow, but I wasn’t moving. I felt too relaxed. Logan’s thumb was stroking sweet circles over the soft skin between my thumb and pointer finger, and that sensation wasn’t worth leaving just to follow Molly to the bar. Besides, Savvy didn’t need another drink yet. She needed to take a rest after that shot, and the several other empty glasses in front of her.

  “She doesn’t need another one yet. Water might be good though.”

  I took another sip of my heavenly green drink. I’d tasted something like this before. It was a sweet melon flavour with a hint of something cocunuty. “Midori Splice?” I asked Logan and he smiled.

  “Take it slow, Liv.”

  A glance at the glass showed that I’d drunk less than a third, which was slow. I rolled my eyes and slunk down in my seat. Good heavens, it was comfy. Molly returned with more of those atrocious shots … only on closer inspection they weren’t the same. These ones were black. She pushed one into Savvy’s hands then slid one in front of me.

  “Hell no,” I said.

  “Come on,” Molly dragged it out in a plea.

  “Nah-uh.” I shook my head.

  “What the hell,” Savvy said. “I’ll only turn twenty once.” And she downed the dark liquid in a single gulp.

  Molly clapped.

  Savvy’s gaze met mine across the table and she sang, “Livia,” with a quirk of her brow.

  No way was I touching that stuff.

  “Don’t call me Livia.”

  She said my name again, and then once more before Molly joined in and it somehow became an O-livia chant.

  I sucked back a deep breath ’til my lungs felt tight.

  “Leave it be,” Logan said. “Liv’s had enough.” My knight in shining armour. I wanted to hug him, so I did. Tossing my arms around his neck, my chair felt a little wobbly and Logan pushed me away. My heart did a funny stop-start as my tummy dipped.

  “Just stopping you from hurting yourself,” he explained, pressing a hand against the corner of my chair. The leg clapped against the floor.

  “Whoopsie.” I licked the sweet remnants of my drink from my bottom lip.

  “Party pooper,” Molly said.

  I could cope with that; I’d been called far worse. I bumped her with my shoulder and suddenly, music erupted out of nowhere. It was loud and poppish and thrummed through my whole body.

  “Dance?” Savvy said.

  I jumped to my feet and grabbed her hand across the table, singing, “I love this song!”

  “Duck,” Savvy warned, but Molly didn’t manage in time, so our hands tangled around her and came apart. We both squealed with laughter. I tugged on Molly’s arm, urging her to come with us. She didn’t take any persuading, turning to join in the fun.

  The three of us were amongst the first on the wooden dance floor, but it filled quickly around us. Savvy threw her hands in the air in her trademark dance style, her glittery top riding up to show off her midriff. Molly hooted.

  It felt freaking awesome to move in time with the music buzzing through me. I always did like dancing, and it had been way too long. Some of Savvy’s friends shimmied up beside her and I glanced back toward the table where Logan sat chatting with Dane. His gaze met mine across the room and he winked.

  Good god, that man was sexy without even trying.

  He turned away abruptly, and in those few seconds we’d been flirting across the room, Dane had stood up, and was talking to Christian.

  Where did he come from? My ex had his hands stuffed in the pockets of his jacket, and he glanced down at Logan, who didn’t bother to stand. In fact, Logan looked a little pissed off. They both did.

  A forceful tap on my shoulder drew my attention around to Molly who pointed to Savvy. The birthday girl held her hands out across the circle of her dancing friends and wriggled her fingers at me. Knowing exactly what she wanted, I grabbed her hands and we came together in the centre. There was something about dancing that was almost the same feeling as being on the hockey field. Out here with my best friend, I could let my guard down and just have fun. It felt mighty good not to care, even though I probably should have. Pity my gaze kept flitting back to Logan.

  What did Christian want with him?

  After we’d danced so long I felt all loose and slightly wobbly, I moved back to my spot beside Molly. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw that Logan hadn’t moved. He didn’t look happy. Dane sat beside him, bent forward with his forearms balanced on his lap and his hands gripping one another. Whatever they were talking about seemed serious.

  Molly tapped my shoulder and raised her hand to her mouth in a gesture meaning she wanted a drink. I felt kind of parched too, but dancing was good. Dancing was wonderful. I never wanted to stop dancing. So I shook my head and grinned. The music morphed from pop to an older song and our group grew smaller. They must have all needed a rest. A strobe light started flickering and Savvy jumped in and out of my vision, the sweat on her brow shining in the white light.

  The beat of this song was fast and the bass thumped in time with my heart. My blood felt as if it were dancing through my veins. The room flashed to black again and my hand was caught from behind. Smiling, I pulled him in behind me, but Logan didn’t give, just tugged on my hand to draw me off the dance floor.

  Now who was the party pooper? In the next flash of white, Savvy’s happy dance face slipped to surprised, her eyes wide and mouth slightly open.

  “Can we talk?” A husky voice spoke in my ear and I spun around, tugging my hand out of his grasp.

  Christian’s gaze met mine, set in determination.

  “Wha
t are you doing here?” I said. “You didn’t come with us, just Dane. ’Cause Savvy likes him.”

  Oops. Did I actually just say that out load? Filter, Olivia, find it!

  Christian’s gaze rolled over me, and was he looking at my chest?

  The dirty perv. I pressed my finger into his chest. “Why the hell did you tell the entire university that I touch myself in my sleep? That was a jackass thing to do, and you know what?” I waited for him to answer, but Christian didn’t. Maybe his mouth wasn’t working right either. Mine seemed a few seconds too fast for my thoughts, or maybe it was my thoughts that were too slow for my mouth. Either way, the words had blurted out before I could stop them. “Well?”

  His gaze moved to mine. “I’m sorry. I never should have said that, no matter if it was true, but I was just so tired, Livie. So goddamn tired all the time. Sleep deprivation—”

  I raised my hands and slammed them right into his chest. “Sorry is bullcrap, Christian. You ruined my life.”

  He stumbled back and kept talking. “I didn’t mean it. I didn’t mean for any of it to happen.”

  “Well, it did.”

  Christian reached for me, trapping my upper arm in his hand. His touch made my blood turn to ice. I wasn’t exaggerating when I said he’d ruined my life. He had ruined my career aspirations. A few good things had come out of this mess, like our break-up, Logan, and my new friendship with Molly. I wasn’t about to give him credit though.

  “Please, Olivia, forgive me. We were so good together. We …” Christian’s gaze flicked behind me. He pulled me toward him, and I had too many feet. They got twisted around each other and stumbling forward, my chest crashed into his and Christian’s arms wrapped around me. He smelled like musky aftershave, and scotch, and completely familiar. My body wanted to melt into his embrace. It started to, but I couldn’t.

  Wouldn’t.