Winning Back Ryan

by S. L. Siwik

  His lips continue down my body until he’s completely out of my reach. Now I have no idea what to do. His hands run down my sides, his fingertips gliding along my skin before his fingers hook the side of my underwear, sliding them down my thighs.

  He glances up at me with a mischievous smile before his head disappears. Brian kisses every single part of my body except for the spot I thought he was heading for. He kisses my inner thighs, my ankles, my navel, my collar bone, everywhere. It feels incredible. Not just because his lips pressed against my skin or his fingers touching me feels amazing, it’s the amount of attention and care he’s paying me. He makes me feel truly wanted and desired.

  Brian finally leaves open mouthed kisses down my belly before settling between my thighs. He inhales deeply before letting out a soft groan, and then takes one long lick. My eyes roll back as I thrust my hips to meet his mouth. My fingers entwine in his hair, massaging his scalp. It’s a new exploration as his fingers and tongue are everywhere. Some places make my feel like my blood is on fire, some spots make me feel tingly in my toes, and some spots make me have an intense feeling in my lower belly like a tightly sprung coil. He seems to be paying attention to all of my reactions, because suddenly he’s only doing the things that make me feel like there’s a coil in my stomach. I’m panting heavily as my fingers tug on his hair…

  Then I woke up.

  Throughout the day, I couldn’t stop focusing on how the dream made me feel: excitement, curiosity, respect, trust, and comfort. But, the one I felt the most was trust, which told me that my subconscious was trying to tell me something. I was not just having some wild sex dream where my feeble mind just placed Brian as the guy. It was deeper than the physical.

  I didn’t want to pay the dream too much credence however, because I hoped if I just ignored it, it would go away. You know, like a door-to-door salesman ringing your bell. If you just remained on your couch and muted your television, eventually they’d move on. The problem wasn’t that I didn’t want Brian. The problem was that he was my best friend and this was very unfamiliar territory. The other problem was that I just stepped out of a relationship. Even worse? I was afraid of messing up. Ruining things with a guy was one thing. Ruining things with your best friend after half a decade of friendship was pure stupidity. I felt that I needed to tread lightly.

  After work on Wednesday, I stopped by the library and picked up a murder mystery book. I couldn’t even pick up a romance book without wanting to gag. On the way home, Ben called, “He went through your lease. I’ve sent to your email a scanned copy of your apartment agreement. Highlighted parts have explanations of what they mean. So, your landlady can’t try anything funny.”

  “Thanks,” I replied, walking with the book tucked under my arm.

  “You can’t get out of the lease unless either you or Ryan loses your job. Then if you show proof of your job loss, you can then get out of the lease after one month.”

  “Great,” I muttered under my breath.

  “Another option is to sublet. Not only can you sublet, but according to your contract you don’t even need to give notice to your landlord. So, that’s an option. However, since it’s only a one bedroom, you can only sublet to one more person if you wanted to do everything legally.”

  “You mean I could sublet the apartment to someone, then leave, and my portion will be covered?” I asked hopefully.

  “Yes, technically.” I could hear him inhale deeply, so I knew he must be smoking. “But, you will still be responsible for the apartment at the end. So, if they trash it or damage it in any way, you’ll be responsible for that.”

  I sighed. There were always ridiculous drawbacks. “Thanks, Ben.”

  “So, what are you doing?” he asked.

  “Just went to the bookstore and took out a book.”

  “What kind of book?” I heard the mischievousness in his voice.

  “A murder mystery. The cheating ex-boyfriend gets killed. Run over by a bus. So sad.”

  He chuckled loudly. “I was hoping for an erotica book, but one about hurting an ex is second best.”

  “Thanks, Ben, I owe you big time for helping me out with this,” I said.

  “Hmm… Well, I wouldn’t mind a blowjob as payment,” he replied casually.

  “Ugh. Don’t you have a girl that you owe orgasms to? You can get your blowjob from her,” I spat.

  He sighed dramatically into the phone. “Then I suppose a simple thank you will suffice.”

  “Thank you.” The words came out through gritted teeth. I rubbed my forehead. “So, I pranced around my apartment last night and cooked in lingerie while Brian was there. Ryan was seething. It was beautiful!”

  “Interesting.” I heard him exhale again. “Tell me about it.”

  I relayed my whole night to him starting with what I did after leaving the office. Ben listened, and I could tell that he occasionally took deep drags of his cigarette.

  “I’d like to be called before your next belly-dancing lesson. I feel I’ve missed out on this experience,” he remarked.

  “What? No. I didn’t even want Brian there.”

  “Ya gotta let me come. You’re branching out, Princess. This is big. I don’t think I’d be a good friend unless I supported you.” I could practically see his smile through the phone.

  “You cannot fondle me or sleep with the other women in my class. Keep your man-whoring to New York.” I hung up, and stopped short as I passed a small bookstore. In the window, I saw a book titled: How To Tame That Wild Boy

  I stepped into the store, smiling. I did owe him a thank you. I picked the book up, thumbed through some of its slightly ridiculous advice and then took it up to the counter.

  The woman behind the counter, highly tattooed, with a septum piercing, didn’t look up from reading her newspaper.

  “Absolutely shameless,” she said in disgust at something she saw.

  I glanced down to see a picture of Ben holding a woman’s breast, smiling devilishly. The woman was smiling brightly, clearly allowing him to do this. His shirt said: Save the ta-tas. Beneath the picture was an article I couldn’t read except for the headlines.

  The Hurleys Come Out for Breast Cancer Awareness. Reduce Crowd To Tears With Moving Speech.

  Ben had told me the week before that he was expected to attend the event.

  “All part of being a Hurley,” he had explained.

  “Absolutely disgusting,” the clerk scoffed.

  The hairs on the back of my neck instantly rose.

  “Do you have any idea how much money people like that man raise for causes such as this?” I spat. The woman glanced up at me, startled. “And do you really think that his hand would be on her breast if she wasn’t allowing it? Hell! She probably wanted him to!”

  “Why on Earth would she want that?” She asked, scathingly.

  “Have you ever had breast cancer? No. I didn’t think so. Maybe she just wanted to feel wanted. He’s very talented at making a woman feel desired and appreciated.”

  The woman looked completely taken aback. “How would you know?”

  “Whatever.” I waved the woman off as I took the right amount out of my pocketbook to pay for the book. The woman took the money, looking at me strangely before handing me the change.

  I turned to leave before turning back around.

  “And how many twenty-three –year-olds do you know donate their time or do anything for someone else that doesn’t strictly benefit themselves? I wish there were more Ben Hurleys in the world; it’d be a much better place.”

  I turned with my purchase in hand and stormed out of the bookstore with a puzzled clerk staring at me as I left. I’d never be shopping there again. I thought about Ben lately and all of our conversations, and I decided that he needed a gag gift. I also thought about George and the video, punching Ryan in the face, and I felt deeply touched all over again. Still angry from that ignorant clerk, I stomped my way to the pharmacy to pick up a few more things for Ben and George’s care p
ackages.

  Chapter Fourteen

  An hour later, two boxes sat on my kitchen counter, one for George and one for Ben.

  I remembered in the video I watched, the night Ryan first cheated, George wanted to come to my room for my cookies. So, I made the ones I remembered him liking, which were now baking. I also made him manly looking potpourri bags scented with sandalwood. They were laying in his box with a card that read: I’ll always be here to bake you cookies and put nice smelling shit in your place. ~Annie

  In Ben’s box, the new book I purchased sat at the bottom along with an unused ice pack, pain relief gel, and a tube of penis shaped ice cube molds. His card read:

  A little birdy told me that your balls were blue.

  I hoped an ice pack would do.

  And while you heal, you should try this writer’s debut.

  Perhaps by the end, you’ll have a breakthrough.

  ~Princess

  I realized the time as I placed the tray of cookies on the stove before making my way to the linen closet for my dirty clothes. I took my laundry basket that was marked in black marker: Anne. I hauled my dirty clothes to the laundromat and when I walked through the doors, I rolled my eyes. He walked over to me, picking up my laundry basket.

  “Fancy meeting you here,” Brian said.

  “What are the odds? Especially after I told you yesterday that I’d be here today,” I replied, though a smile slipped.

  He placed my basket down next to him, and I took out the roll of quarters. As I began sorting my clothes, I quickly realized that half of the clothes in the basket were Ryan’s.

  “That son of a bitch,” I muttered.

  “He stuck his clothes in your basket hoping that you’d wash them?” Brian asked before chuckling, “Man, that guy has some balls.”

  I realized how to turn the situation to my advantage and smiled. I gathered all of Ryan’s clothes together and placed them in a separate washing machine. Then I tossed all of my clothes in another washer. After placing the quarters into the slots, I held the roll out for Brian. As he held out his hand to take it, I pulled it back, puckering my lips. He smiled, leaning in, and kissed me. When we pulled away, I held the roll of quarters back out for him to take.

  “Something interesting happened to me today,” he said.

  “Oh yeah?”

  “Yeah, I put on my boxers this morning, and do you know what I found?” He leaned in closely, whispering, “Money.”

  I held back a chuckle. “Wow. Sounds like you had a hell of a morning.”

  He bent over the washer, his voice deepening, “You have no idea.” He waggled his brows suggestively. “It’s not every day that I wake up next to a beautiful woman wearing very naughty lingerie.”

  “No, that only happens every other day,” I replied, rolling my eyes. “I can’t believe that you didn’t figure it out when I sent you that text. The boxers are green and the money is green. That’s why I wrote, ‘Green is my favorite color on you.’ Get it? On you, since the money was pressed against your body.” I sighed. “I would have thought someone in advertising would have caught on sooner. I suppose you were a little too busy admiring yourself in the mirror while you combed your hair a hundred times.”

  I moved to sit down in a nearby bright, orange, plastic chair with my book in hand. Brian sat down next to me still laughing from my comment.

  “You’re in rare form today. Why are you wound up more than usual?” he asked.

  I shrugged, unable to look him in the eyes. “Just in a lot of pain from the caffeine withdrawal. It’s making me edgy.” The truth was that sometimes I hurt so badly that I wanted to rip my skin off, because it honestly seemed like it would hurt less.

  “You’re still going through withdrawal?” he asked. “That’s not normal.”

  I shrugged again. “Maybe I drank more than I realized. I drank four large cups a day.” Or six.

  “Then it’ll take some time,” he replied.

  “Yup.” My mouth popped on the ‘p’ as I stared down at my running sneakers. Brian’s hand slipped around my shoulder.

  Ring Ring.

  I took my cell phone out of my pocket. “Hello?”

  “Oh, my God, Annie! Why didn’t you tell me?” Amanda Giles shouted on the other end of the phone.

  “Tell you what?” I asked. I’ve now put her on speakerphone.

  “That you slept with Brian! Everyone knows,” she exclaimed.

  “How does everyone know?” I glanced at Brian curiously. Surely he wouldn’t have spread a rumor like that.

  “Ryan is telling everyone. He has it written on Facebook.”

  As soon as Brian heard her statement, he pulled out his phone, signing on to his page. He scrolled down, clicking on Ryan’s picture.

  “So, what was it like? Sleeping with Brian?” She asked me. “Isn’t it pretty incredible when he does that thing with his tongue?”

  I covered my hand over my mouth to keep the laughter down while my eyebrows nearly reached my hairline. I turned towards Brian who paled at her words.

  “That’s really inappropriate, Amanda,” Brian shouted into the phone.

  “Brian, is that you?” she asked nervously.

  “Yeah, sorry, I was just…parking the car. Then Annie told me that you were on the phone. How’ve you been?” he asked, his jaw clenched. The words came out strained. I looked at him curiously. So, he had slept with Amanda at some point. That was news to me.

  “Oh, Brian, what’s the big deal? It was a long time ago. But, it was pretty incredible,” Amanda replied. Brian’s features darkened as he stared at the phone between us.

  “Alright, I have to go, Amanda,” I spoke into the phone.

  “Why are you in a rush?” she asked, annoyed.

  “I’m sorry. I’m just pissed that Ryan is putting my life on blast. Do you know why we broke up? I caught him sleeping with a chick in our bed. Then he was sleeping with Kelly that weekend, throwing a party, tearing my apartment apart with freeloaders.”

  “Annie, I thought you guys had an open relationship,” she said quietly.

  “What are you talking about?” I asked.

  “He’s been sleeping with Kelly for like three months now. He’s been telling everyone that you and he have an open relationship.”

  I stared at the front load washing machine in front of me, watching the laundry through the glass window. The clothes were spinning around and around. It was an apt metaphor for what was going on in my mind at that moment.

  “No,” I spat into the phone. “We didn’t. He’s lying and a cheating scumbag, and she’s a whore. Tell everyone.” No one could spread gossip quite like Amanda.

  I hung up the phone, and Brian looked at me. “Are you alright?”

  “Ryan sleeping with Kelly wasn’t new news.” I sighed, rubbing my forehead. My head was throbbing. “What is he saying on his page? And I’d like to know when the hell he found time to screw all of these women and be home with me every night.”

  “I’m not sure you want to read this,” he said, eyeing me warily.