The Big Ten: The First Ten Books of the Beginnings Series

by Jacqueline Druga

  ***

  Robbie groaned once, a painful soft moan that vibrated his whole body. His face felt the cold and hard ground. Yet as he opened one eye, he did not see the wilderness that he had anticipated. The vision before him, a red speckled linoleum floor, was not what he expected. He lay on his stomach, arms stretched above his head. He lifted his head once, the dried blood that had formed between his nostril and the floor acted as an adhesive.

  Robbie sat up, he wiped his nose with the back of his hand, it still trickled blood. The bridge of his nose throbbed in pain and he could not breathe through it. He knew for sure it was broken.

  What had happened? Where was he? He looked around the room. It was a large quiet room. Shelves filled with books, and long tables scattered about. An old library. The dust was so thick, it floated through the air and could be seen in the rays of the sun as it peeked through the board covered windows.

  He remembered in his mind the night before, or at least he thought it was the night before. The vision of Miguel holding him down as Henry injected him with something in the neck. The night would forever be hard to forget. The overwhelming after-effects of the pulverization he took from Frank started to hit him, and Robbie lifted himself from the floor.

  The room nor the building looked familiar. Robbie staggered around, his mouth was dry and he needed something to drink. Then it dawned on him, maybe Beginnings had changed their minds. Maybe they never removed him from the community, but placed him instead in some sort of prison.

  Robbie lifted a chair that lay on its side. He plopped his sore body in it, taking deep breaths, because breathing was difficult. As he rested his head back, the door of the room opened. A figure of a man appeared. The sun shined brightly behind him causing the man to look like a shadow. The man was big, very big.

  Robbie squinted to the figure as he walked in the room. “Frank?” he called out. “Frank is that you?”

  ***

  Joe was on his way into the lab to speak to Dean when he heard the breaking of glass. He thought he heard some sort of mumbled obscenity following it, but he wasn’t sure. He hesitated in his walk in when he saw Dean trying to clean up a spill, then get so frustrated he had to stop to bury his face in his hands.

  Joe continued in, laying a hand on Dean’s back as he stood next to him. “How you holding up?”

  Sliding his fingertips down his face, Dean gazed up to Joe. “Not well.”

  “I know that.”

  “But I bet . . . probably not as well as Ellen.”

  “Have you been back home today?” Joe asked.

  “Oh, yeah. Several times. And several times she threw me out.” Dean shrugged. “I guess that’s to be expected. Last I was there she was working on some ‘reasons why I hate Frank and Dean’ list.”

  “Ah, therapy.” Joe nodded and smiled a forced smile.

  “Joe.” Dean leaned on the counter. “I am so sorry about your family. All the way around.”

  “I am too. I’ve seen better days. Then again, I’ve seen worse.”

  “Amen to that.” Andrea’s comment rang in the room as she walked in. “I just got back from examining Ellen. Curious?”

  “Absolutely.” Dean said. “How is she doing?”

  “Well.” Andrea nodded. “Hurting, sore. She won’t come in for an x-ray. But she’ll heal.”

  “What about emotionally?” Joe asked. “Did she say anything to you? I mean when I was there, she seemed fine.”

  “She is,” Andrea said. “Ellen has this unnerving ability to be very . . . cold. She doesn’t love anymore so therefore she doesn’t get hurt. A very distinctive defense mechanism that she has fine tuned through the years. She doesn’t know how to be any other way. So this isn’t bothering her. And if it did, she’s working through it. Compiling some sort of list.”

  “Still?” Dean asked surprised. “Swell. I don’t want to see it.”

  “I don’t think she plans on showing you.” Andrea smiled. “But my concern doesn’t just lie with Ellen . . .” She turned to Joe. “It lies with you as well, Joe. How are you handling all this?”

  “Handling.” Joe nodded. “It’s a good thing I firmly believe obstacles and heartaches that don’t break us . . . make us strong.”

  So impressed Andrea looked “Joe, that was very good.”

  “Thanks. It’s a Joe quote.” He nodded then turned serious. “But I’ll tell ya, right now with all that’s happened, according to my quote, I should be Hercules.”

  ***

  Paul looked around his house, he couldn’t believe what had happened. Robbie was gone. It all seemed like a bad dream. George coming to the home the night before to gather Robbie’s things. Calmly, being such the politician, George told Paul the reason. Robbie had attacked Ellen. Paul had a hard time believing that because Robbie was so into Ellen. He thought it was some sort of mistake. The details were skim. Robbie was with Ellen. Ellen called out for help. Frank showed up. Paul’s mind wandered to the defense of his friend. Perhaps Frank misunderstood the situation. Robbie had adjustment problems, and a short fuse, but would he risk what he had searched so long for? Paul kept coming up with the answer ‘no’.

  He began to debate in his mind if it was time for him also to leave Beginnings. He had accepted the fact that they ousted people, he knew that. He couldn’t accept the fact that they ousted Robbie. A line had to be drawn somewhere. In Paul’s mind he believed Beginnings crossed that line when they tossed Robbie back into a world that was so harsh.

  “Hello?” Michelle called from the front door that was open. “Paul, are you here?”

  “Michelle, hi.”

  “I had to see it for myself. I had to see if it was true. Robbie’s really gone.” Michelle folded her arms close to her and hung her head down.

  “I can’t believe it myself. You were friends with him also. Did you see it coming? I didn’t. I know Robbie was short tempered, but to try to rape Ellen?”

  “No. Not with how he felt about Ellen. Something is not right. Robbie wouldn’t jeopardize losing the family he looked for. You know I wouldn’t doubt at all if Frank set this whole thing up. Walked in, busted Robbie and Ellen . . .”

  “Toss Robbie out.” Paul finished her sentence. “But . . . who are we to say anything?”

  “Certainly not originals.” Michelle said.

  “And neither was Robbie,” sadly Paul stated.

  “I wish there was some way to help him. I really do.”

  “I know what you mean.” Paul said. “Who knows, maybe, maybe someday, somehow we’ll get that chance.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  “So how long were you in the community?” The burly man with long red hair and whiskers asked Robbie as he handed him a cup of water.

  “Thanks.” Robbie took the water, he gulped it down, it was bitter, and his face showed it. “About four weeks, maybe five. I don’t know.”

  “That long? Never heard of anyone being there that long and being ousted. About thirty who were ousted live here.”

  “Here? Where is here?”

  “A small town ‘bout forty miles or so from the community.”

  “So that’s where they dropped me.” Robbie grunted as he stood up, holding on to his side. His ribs had also been broken. “They dropped off a kid here a little while back. A kid named Jason. Know him?”

  “Yes. But the kids not all there. He comes and goes all the time. But they didn’t drop you here. We heard the chopper last night. Figured they were ousting someone. We got on the horses and followed, got you and brought you here.”

  “Is this some sort of place the rejects hang?” Robbie was sarcastic but realized it wasn’t warranted. The man was being hospitable. “Sorry, I’m just angry.”

  “Understandable, and pretty beat up too. Never seen that before either.”

  “Well it’s all a big misunderstanding. I know it is. I just got to get back there.”

  “They don’t make mistakes. And going back there won’t make a difference, some of us
had tried. They don’t care. They won’t let you back in.”

  “They’ll let me back in.”

  “And what makes you so special?”

  “ My name is Robbie Slagel. I have a right to be in there. And I’m gonna go back there as soon as my body heals. Can I stay here until then?”

  “Sure. I’ll even help you get back there, on one condition.”

  “What’s that?” Robbie apprehensively asked.

  “That you come back here and join us if they turn you away. I need bodies. Bodies to do what I want to do. I call myself Moses, because I plan on leading these people to the promised land. That land is Beginnings.”

  “You plan to storm Beginnings one day?”

  “I do. When I have enough people. And trust me they will regret it.” Moses held out his hand to Robbie. “Well Mr. Slagel, what is your answer?”

  “If they turn me away I will be back. Without a doubt.” Certain that he would not have to return, Robbie sealed his promise with a firm handshake. He needed Moses and his town so he could build up his strength. Strength to go back and reclaim his place in Beginnings, and strength to fight Beginnings if they refused to let him back.

  ***

  Dean expected the house to be quieter when he returned home that evening for what seemed the tenth time. Quiet was not what Dean got, he was immediately pummeled by his screaming children the second he stepped into his home.

  “Daddy . . .Daddy.” Alexandra jumped in his arms.

  “Where’s Mommy?”

  Ellen stepped from the kitchen into the dining area holding plates. “You’re back.”

  “What are you doing out of bed?”

  Alexandra grabbed Dean’s nose and squeezed. “Mommy fell down a hill.”

  “Yes, I know sweetie.” Dean removed her pinching hand and put her down. “Where’s Frank? Tell me he’s not upstairs rearranging my stuff.”

  “Frank left awhile ago.” Ellen placed the forks down. “The kids are starving. I’m glad you’re here to do the meal thing.”

  Dean ignored her dinner conversation. “He left you alone?”

  “No Dean, I haven’t been alone. Everyone and their mother stopped by today. Frankly, I’m sick of people.”

  “I’m here now, why don’t you go upstairs and get some rest.”

  “No, I don’t want to rest. I’m going out for a walk.” Ellen walked past him to the living room, she bent down and kissed her kids. “Mommy won’t be long. She’ll be right back.” She quickly headed to the door.

  Dean ran to her, stopping her. “El, don’t go out. Come on. Stay home. We’ll talk. You can . . .” Dean smiled. “Show me the ‘Dean hate’ list.”

  “Dean, I’m sorry. But I need to get out of this house. I have been here all day. I’ve had people in and out asking me how I’m doing. Giving me looks of pity. I had a bad experience, yes. I need to get over it. Now laying around and feeling sorry for myself, isn’t going to do it. I need to put it behind me.”

  “El, please.” Dean tried to be soothing. “I understand what you are saying. Fine, get over it, but do it after you’ve rested for a few days. Look at your face.” He ran his hand down her cheek. “You’re hurt. This was not a minor thing that happened to you.”

  “You don’t think, Dean? Compared to what has happened in my life time it is.” Ellen began to leave but stopped. “Dean, look, I know what you and everyone else is trying to do. I appreciate it, I do. But I have to get through this my own way.”

  “Is forgetting that it happened the way to do it?”

  “Trust me, I’ll never forget it happened. But I fought too hard to get where I am in my life now. I can’t, for a second, let this pull me back.” Ellen opened the door. “I won’t be long. I promise. I just want to go off by myself for awhile.”

  Ellen knew where to go, the only place in the whole community that she felt peace at. A place she called ‘the hill’. She had to borrow a jeep to get close enough to walk there. But it was worth it. Off by the security training area, it was far enough away, yet high enough to see everything afoot. It was peaceful and quiet and lonely. Standing in the grassy area of ‘the hill’ Ellen paced slightly in thought.

  “I kind of figured this is where you would be,” Frank called to her. “I went back to your house, you were gone. Dean said you wanted to be alone.”

  Ellen turned her head back to him. “At the risk of sounding sarcastic, why are you here then?”

  “Something’s bothering me and it can’t wait.”

  Ellen, arms folded tight to her, stared out. She heard the rustling of papers but feared turning around.

  “See. I have a problem with number fourteen. What the hell else am I supposed to do with my fingernails after I bite them? You have to spit them out. Number three . . . I laughed, I agree. But number forty-eight. I have to argue on that. No way . . .”

  “Frank.” Ellen gasped out his name then turned around. “You can’t argue my ‘things I hate about you’ list.” Ellen walked up to him and snatched it from his hand. “And what are you doing with it anyhow?”

  “Dean had his.”

  “I don’t care.”

  “I thought, you know, we could compare our lists.”

  Ellen was surprised. “You made a list of things you hate about me?”

  “Well, yeah. I thought that’s what we were doing.” He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper. “Wanna see?”

  “Yes.” Ellen snapped and took the sheet. “At least it’s not six pages.” She unfolded it and stared. She turned it over. “Frank? It’s . . . blank.”

  “That’s because there’s nothing I hate about you.”

  Ellen cringed and whined loudly. “Now see. See.” She stomped. “This right here is the exact reason I put that one thing on my list.”

  “Number twenty-seven. You hate me because I’m sensitive.”

  Ellen laughed. “That is not what it said. I said I hate you because no matter what, you always know what to do and what to say to get to me. Even if it’s all an act.” She shook her head at the blank sheet of paper. “Now I feel really bad about my list.”

  “Um El? That’s uh . . . the point.” Frank winked as if he let her in on a punch line she didn’t quite understand.

  “I know that.” She handed the paper back to him. “Do you realize how good the blank paper idea was?”

  “Hell yeah,” Frank said. “You should have heard Andrea going on about how sweet of an idea it was when Dean told her he was gonna do it. So I said, ‘No fuckin way is he getting one up on me.’”

  “You overheard Dean telling Andrea he was giving me a blank hate list.”

  “Yeah.”

  “And you stole it from him?” Ellen stepped close to Frank. “You stole Dean’s win-me-over idea?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Oh my God, Frank. That is so wrong.”

  “So is making a hate list.”

  “You told me to.”

  “I didn’t mean it.”

  Ellen went silent as she stared up at him. “And I didn’t mean . . . I didn’t mean a lot of what I said last night. I was angry, I was hurt. My body ached . . .”

  “El. Don’t worry about it.”

  “I have to.” Ellen softened her voice. “Frank, you’ve come to my rescue more times than I can count. And just so you know how I feel. Really feel. Every time you charge in and save the day, you are no less than a hero. My hero. Always.”

  Frank raised his eyebrows slowly one time and shifted his weight to one foot. He looked up to the sky then back down to Ellen. “Nice try.”

  Ellen mouth dropped open in shock.

  Frank closed it. “Nope. You were right. I have to admit. Nothing’s like it.” Frank took on a phony arrogant tone. “Yep. Run in, be the hero. Run home . . .” Frank cleared his throat. “And whack off. I do get off on being the hero, you know.”

  Slowly Ellen shook her head with a soft chuckle. She let a moment of silence pass and she looked up to Frank. �
�I really miss you.”

  The heavy breath of relief Frank let out brought him closer to Ellen. His hands hovered over her face and his lips over hers. He waited until he knew Ellen wasn’t pulling back and then he laid his hands to her cheeks and spread his fingers to feel her entire face. He brought his lips to Ellen’s and kissed her as gently as he could without hurting her. But that one barely touching kiss was filled with the intensity of his emotions that seeped through. “I love you.” He stared at her. “This has been a pretty rough month for us. And last night was the end to that. It was painful. I want to get through this with you. I need to. And I swear to God, everything’s that happened with Robbie, my stand, your stand. We have to put it behind us and never . . . look back. Because it’s over.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  June 7th

  The fluttering of the horse’s mouth sent a foul stench of air blasting toward Robbie. He quickly turned his head from the odor, holding on to the reigns trying to keep control of the black horse loaned to him by Moses. “Easy.” He pet the head of the horse.

  “Got everything?” Moses secured Robbie’s pack behind the saddle of the horse.

  “Yes. I think.”

  “Now, she’s watered and fed. Keep a good steady pace and you should hit Beginnings in a few hours. The way that I mapped out for you should take you to the southwest section of the perimeter. It’s about two miles south of the back gate. Got it?”

  “Got it.” Robbie placed his foot in the stirrup and mounted the horse. The horse jumped back a little.

  “It’s gonna be difficult with you leaving at night. But that fancy watch you have has a light on its compass. Stay steady east, don’t wander left or right. About two thirds of your way there, if you are correct, you’ll hit the highway. It’s easy from there on. Are you sure you wouldn’t want to wait until sun up?”

  “No. I want to get there at sun up. It’s best.” Robbie was ready to go. “Now what am I gonna do with the horse?”