by Kait Nolan
“Yeah! Please, Tara? Please please please please?”
From his position slouched in a chair, Austin rolled his eyes.
Tara looked down at her sister, obviously searching for the right thing to say. She didn’t want to dance. Not in front of all of them. That much was obvious. Being goofy at home with your kid sister was a lot different from being goofy in front of relative strangers.
Jace stepped forward, intending to rescue her, but as it turned out, Tara couldn’t deny her baby sister anything.
“All right. But just one. I’m starving.” Tara moved to toe off her shoes and shrug out of her coat. “You may want to push the furniture back a little. My legs are longer than Ginny’s.”
By the time they’d shoved the sofa and chairs further back, the music had shifted yet again.
“Do you want to go back to the ‘Waltz of the Snowflakes’?” she asked Ginny.
“The ‘Spanish Dance’ will do,” Ginny said, quite seriously.
Jace perched on the arm of Austin’s chair and settled in to watch as the sisters took their positions. Ginny looked over, tried to match her stance to Tara’s. Some formal pose with their arms curved and their feet in opposite L shapes. It was going to be fun to see Tara loosen up.
Then the music started and they began to dance, mirroring each other in posturing bows to their tiny crowd. Whatever assumptions he’d made that they’d be silly or awkward vanished the moment Tara began to move. Her arms reached for the sky in long, graceful lines. As a unit, she and Ginny took several steps to the side, reaching and pointing. Tara’s leg snapped up, high as her head with each pass. As the music escalated, the pair of them spun in circles Jace thought of as more common on ice skates. But Tara did it without any apparent effort. Jesus, how could anyone actually balance on their toes like that? What kind of strength must be in those feet?
Coming out of a spin, Ginny lost her balance with a giggle, landing splayed in Livia’s lap. Tara kept going. Jace realized her eyes were closed and half expected her to run into someone or something. But she never faltered, moving in perfect tune with the music until it came to a close, her body bent in a graceful arc, one foot curved impossibly above her head. Her expression when she stopped was caught somewhere between pleasure and pain. She held the position until the next track began, then unfolded in a sinuous motion entirely in keeping with the ‘Arabian Dance’ that was starting. Jace didn’t even think she was aware of doing it.
He was the first to break the stunned silence. “I think I speak for all of us when I say, wow. I had no idea you were a dancer.”
The openness in her face shifted to something else, a flash of pain quickly shuttered by her usual even expression. “I’m not.”
“Pretty sure everything we just saw points to the contrary,” Livia said.
“I was a dancer.” Her tone indicated the subject was closed. She bent to tug on her shoes. “Now, time for you both to wash your hands for supper.”
The kids raced down the hall to do as she asked.
Dinner was a raucous affair, with Ginny and Austin providing a play-by-play of their evening since they arrived at the farm.
“—and then we met Kip. He likes to play fetch and give kisses,” Ginny reported. “I wanted to bring him to my room, but Jace said he sleeps in the barn.”
“He does,” Jace’s dad, Evan, said. “He’s a total bed hog otherwise.”
“I’m tiny. I don’t mind.”
“Yeah but if we let him sleep with you, it’d spoil him and then he’d expect to come inside all the time,” Linda told her.
“Plus he keeps Pepper company so she doesn’t have bad dreams,” Jace said.
Ginny looked worried. “Pepper has bad dreams?”
Uh oh. Misstep.
“Not with Kip,” he assured her. “They snuggle up in her stall.”
“I have bad dreams sometimes,” the little girl said quietly.
“And you can come crawl into bed with me if you do. I’m right across the hall,” Tara said. “But after the day you’ve had I’m sure visions of puppies and Christmas trees will be dancing in your little head.”
“And sugar plums!”
“What is a sugar plum anyway?” Jace wondered. “It always sounded like a fruit snack.”
“Maybe we’ll look it up on Google and see if we can make some, while you’re here,” Linda said.
They all cleared the table.
“How about you two come with me and run off some energy before bed,” Evan suggested.
“Oh, I don’t want to put you out,” Tara said. “I’m sure you have something you’d rather be doing.”
“Not a thing. C’mon kids!”
Linda laid a hand on her shoulder. “They’re a real pleasure to have around. If it’s okay with you, I’d really love to adopt Ginny and Austin as my grands for the holiday since my two haven’t seen fit to grace me with any yet.”
“Still finishing school,” Jace protested.
“Still single,” Livia answered.
“Yeah, yeah. I know. But I’m not getting any younger!”
“I—well that’s lovely, thank you, Mrs. Applewhite.”
“Please, call me Linda.”
After finishing up the dishes, Jace wandered outside in search of Tara.
She stood at the porch rail, watching them running and shrieking with laughter in the lights from the barn. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard them this happy.”
Jace propped himself on a column beside her, wishing she looked happy. “It’s a simple enough thing.”
She turned to him. “But it’s not. I don’t know how to thank you for this. I mean, you don’t even know us and you’ve brought all of us out here, more or less into your home, for a holiday that’s meant for family.” Her posture was stiff as her voice, and flags of color burned in her cheeks.
“That was an easy thing, too. We have plenty of room.”
“And that’s it? You have room, you saw a need, so boom, you just finagle complete strangers into coming to your home?”
Her look of total consternation made him smile. “You’re still mad I wrangled you into this.”
“Oh, we’re going to put that out in the open? Fine. Yes, I am. I don’t like being maneuvered. I especially don’t like my siblings being used for manipulation. But you set it up in such a way that I couldn’t say no without destroying Christmas for them.”
That wiped the smile off his face. “That wasn’t my intention. Truly, it wasn’t.”
“Then what was your intention, Jace? Why are you doing this? What do you hope to get out of it?”
He thought of the sadness that lurked in her eyes and that need he had to do something about it for her as he hadn’t been able to for someone else. “A smile.”
Tara shook her head. “What?”
“If all goes according to plan, I hope to get a smile out of it.”
“A smile?” At another hoot of laugher, she shot a glance into the yard, making sure the kids were okay. “From the kids?”
“From you. I’m betting yours is killer.”
Tara obviously had no idea what to say to that.
Because he couldn’t help himself, Jace reached out to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. “You have the prettiest, saddest eyes, I’ve ever seen.”
She frowned. “So—what? You decided to play Santa to me and my family to fix it?”
“I’m not arrogant enough to believe I can fix it.” He’d learned that hard lesson well enough with Jordan. “But getting a real smile out of you is the kind of personal challenge I like.”
“Look, Jace. You’re a nice guy. Obviously you are. And I can appreciate that you’re apparently interested in me, but I just can’t—I’m not in a position to think about something so simple as dating. I’ve got too much responsibility.”
Unperturbed, he nodded. “I respect that. But for while you’re staying at the farm, you’ve got help. People who legitimately dig the kids and want to spend time with them. I swear
to you they aren’t a burden. So maybe for however long you’re here, you could give yourself a break and enjoy a good, old fashioned country Christmas.”
Tara frowned. “No strings?”
“No strings,” he assured her.
She shook her head. “I don’t understand you.”
“Do you need to?”
“I need things to make sense. Generally when something seems too good to be true, it is. Everything you’re offering here seems like it should have a gigantic neon sign blinking Suckers Apply Here.”
Jace could’ve been offended at that. But that kind of attitude didn’t develop without having learned some hard lessons. So instead he said, “You know what the best part of a good, old-fashioned country Christmas is?”
“What?”
“The more the merrier. If there’s one thing that Applewhites know, it’s how to do Christmas. We want to do this for you, for your brother and sister. Because we can. Because it’s fun. And yeah, I am interested in more than that—not gonna lie—but I’m not going to push you. So just take what I’m offering here and enjoy it. I get the sense you haven’t let yourself do that since you took charge of the kids.”
She gave a soft, self-deprecatory laugh. “That’s true enough. So I’ll stop being rude and looking this gift horse in the mouth and just say thank you for your hospitality.”
That, Jace decided, was a start.
Chapter 5
“I have the prettiest, saddest eyes he’s ever seen? I mean, what the heck am I supposed to say to that?” Tara demanded.
Daniel, the other barista on duty, listened with rapt attention. “Did he touch you as he said it?”
She pretended she had to think about it, though the gesture was burned into her brain. “He tucked my hair behind my ear.”
“That’s so romantic,” he sighed, absently placing the pre-filled coffee filter into the waiting container.
“Focus, Daniel. He thinks I’m sad.”
He unfolded the next filter and held it waiting for the fresh ground beans Tara was scooping. “Honey, you are sad.”
“Seriously? Is this what people see when they look at me?” More importantly, is this what her brother and sister saw? The last thing she wanted was for either of them to feel like she resented them for what she had to give up to take care of them.
“Probably not most people. Most folks don’t look too close. But sweetheart, you’ve got cocker spaniel eyes. Big and soulful. And yes, sad. But who can blame you? You were basically a mom at nineteen. While everybody else is out doing the college thing, you’re here earning your angel wings. It’s noble and honorable, but you wouldn’t be human if that didn’t make you sad sometimes.”
“Then I suppose I’m very human.” She finished with the Anjilinaka from Bolivia and moved on to the Riakiberu from Kenya. “I don’t regret it. If I had it to do over, I’d do the exact same thing. I just...I guess I’m feeling what I gave up a little more keenly right now.”
As if on cue, “The Waltz of the Flowers” began to play on their internet radio station. Again.
Right. Twist that knife a little deeper.
“Sounds like your Mr. Applewhite wants to make up for that.”
“He’s not mine.”
“Well, clearly he wants to be.”
Tara fisted both hands on her hips. “I don’t get it. Why? What’s in this for him? He doesn’t know me. Yet he’s going out of his way to be nice to me, to my brother and sister. Nobody does all that for just a smile.”
“A smile?”
“That’s what he said he was after when I asked him. He wanted to make me smile.”
“Oh honey.” Daniel laid a hand over his heart. “That is just the sweetest—”
“Craziest,” Tara interrupted.
“You, my darling girl, are jaded and suspicious.”
“I have to be jaded and suspicious. The world is not a nice place, Daniel.”
“You don’t live in the world, sweet cheeks. You live in Wishful.”
“Which, I concede is a nicer place than most, but still.”
“I think you’re looking for some ulterior motive where there is none. You need to consider the fact this really is what it appears to be.”
“Which is?”
“You’ve caught the attention of a real dreamboat guy, and he just wants to spend time with you. And, in this case, I don’t mean ‘spend time’ as a euphemism. Although Jace Applewhite is hunky and delicious enough that if I weren’t with Christoff and he swung the other way, I’d be all about spending some quality time with him.”
“Daniel,” she chided.
“What? Don’t you find him attractive?”
“If you like the tall, broad-shouldered lumberjack type.” She pictured Jace hefting that axe. “With those big, capable hands...”
Daniel grinned.
“Okay, yes, damn it, I find him attractive. I’m not blind or dead.” Which was probably part of the problem. It wasn’t nearly as easy to shut off the attraction to Jace as it had been to the various other guys who’d shown interest over the last year and a half.
“So what’s stopping you?”
“I don’t have time for dating.” She’d made the excuse often enough, it fell off her tongue in a rote recitation. “I am, as you pointed out, basically a mom. A single mom at that.”
Daniel took her by the shoulders. “Sweetie, I respect the fact that you’ve embraced that role and all the responsibilities that go with it. God knows those kids needed that. But it’s still important for you to remember that you’re more than that.”
How can I be, when I’m here? In coming to Wishful to be guardian to her siblings, she’d given up the core of her identity. “I barely remember what else I am or used to be.”
“You are a vibrant and gorgeous woman in her prime, who deserves to get a little attention just for her. Jace Applewhite wants to give you that attention. And he’s arranged for a situation where you actually have opportunity for that. Why on earth wouldn’t you take advantage of that?”
“Because.” There were reasons.
“Because, why?”
“I don’t know if I even remember how.”
“How long has it been since you did something as normal as going out on a date?”
“A year. And I’m not sure it actually counts as a date. When he came to pick me up at the house and saw the kids and babysitter, it took him only about twenty minutes to make his excuses and drop me back off. Nobody in my age bracket wants to sign on for a package deal. And who can blame them? Twenty-one is hardly the time most people are thinking about kids. They’re too busy figuring out what they want to do with their lives, playing the field. Nobody wants to be a pseudo-parent at that age.” God knew she hadn’t.
“Yes, but consider the fact that Jace knows about the kids. Knew about them when he offered up the apartment. He’s known about them all along and seems to enjoy spending actual time with them. All points in his favor. He’s still not running. He actually likes you, Tara.”
He hadn’t balked at the news that her father was in prison either.
“You think I should give him a chance.”
“I think you should give yourself a chance. Take this opportunity to be a normal girl for once.”
Tara thought of the wish she’d made a couple of weeks before. Was that what this was? The unexpected answer to her first wish? If that were the case, it was probably bad luck not to accept it. Right?
“Well...what harm could it do?”
~*~
“You want to slide your hand through here like this and then just rub the comb in circles.” Jace demonstrated the curry comb on Pepper’s flank.
Ginny looked doubtful. “But it’s all pokey. Doesn’t it hurt?”
“Nope. See, she likes it. It’s like getting a massage. Just be sure not to use it on her legs or head.”
“I can do that.”
Jace helped her onto a stool so she’d be at the right height and handed over the
comb. “That’s it, you’ve got it.”
He moved over to check on Austin. “How you coming with Rupert?”
“Pretty good.”
Satisfied the kids were occupied, Jace took a seat and began polishing up the wagon harnesses. Ginny kept up a steady commentary talking to Pepper, giving a repeat of the same play-by-play she’d given him when he’d picked them up from school. Her brother stayed silent, only occasionally murmuring to the gelding. The boy had a good hand with the horses. Calm and gentle. They were good kids.
As he dipped his polishing cloth into the saddle soap, Jace realized Austin was studying him.
“Something on your mind?”
“Are you a player?”
“Sports or video games?” If the kid was into football, he totally had the latest Madden on Xbox. Or they could pull out the actual ball and toss it around.
“No, I mean, are you serious about my sister or just messing with her?”
Oh. Jace looked up from the harness. Never in his life would he have imagined he’d be having the “what are your intentions?” talk with a fifth grader.
“I am absolutely, a hundred percent not messing with Tara. I wouldn’t do that to her. I like her. We’re friends. Or working on it.”
Austin wasn’t buying it. “Friends isn’t what you’re going for.”
Astute kid. “Honestly, no. I’d like to be more than friends. But that’s entirely up to your sister. Your being here hasn’t got anything to do with her decision either way. I want all of you to feel welcome and have fun for the holiday.”
“I’m having fun!” Ginny chirped.
Jace smiled. “I’m glad.” Looking back at Austin he asked, “Are we cool?”
Another long Look. “Yeah.”
“It’s good of you to look out for Tara.” Jace wondered what she’d say if she knew her baby brother was as protective of her as she was of him.
“She looks out for us. Somebody ought to be looking out for her.”
“Tara’s the best sister in the whole, wide world,” Ginny declared.
“I happen to think she’s pretty awesome, too,” Jace told her.
“She stayed,” Austin said simply. “She stayed when she didn’t have to. A lot of people wouldn’t.”
