A Falling Starr: The Complete Trilogy

by Dani Hoots

  I tapped my finger to the beats of the song that played. “Somebody I Used to Know” by Gotye. I hadn’t heard it in a while, surprisingly. A few months ago the mall had it playing all the time, along with some other rock songs I didn’t care for. At least I didn’t have to hear those again. After the song ended, one of the songs I hated began. “Umbrella” by Rihanna.

  Dang it. Now that would be stuck in my head the rest of the night.

  “Hi Miss Starr,” Pete, greeted. His light brown hair was shaggy and messed up, covering his light hazel eyes. He set his books down on the table. I watched as his sister put on her hot pink skates and followed her friends onto the rink. Their mom took a seat a few tables away and pulled out her computer. I think she was an event coordinator, but I could have been mistaken. Maybe it was architecture.

  I straightened up in my chair. “Hi Pete. How was school today?”

  He beamed. “I got a ‘B’ on my chemistry homework, one that I did without your help. I think I’m starting to get the hang of it.”

  “That’s great! Pretty soon you won’t need my help at all.”

  He blushed and opened up his notebook. “Wasn’t today your first day? College must be so cool.”

  “It’s all right. Lots of studying so you better get into a good habit now before you start, huh?” I smiled to myself.

  He nodded and we spent the next hour going over homework for both of the classes.

  Swinging my sack of Chinese food back and forth, I headed towards my apartment with a growling stomach. I had a craving for lemon chicken during my tutor session and August Moon had the best Chinese food ever. I had tried other restaurants but it never tasted nearly as good. Although I didn’t like eating out twice in one day, I decided to spoil myself since today was my first day of school. And I really wanted Chinese.

  Thankfully Pete’s mom paid me in cash today so I didn’t have to use my credit card. I wasn’t sure how much more room I had on the card anyway. Hopefully my other students remembered to pay me this week.

  Textbooks were expensive. I should have bought them on Amazon, but I got so excited about going to the school bookstore that I didn’t even think about checking prices online. Someone should really warn students about how costly they were.

  Shadows scurried across the pavement, as if in a hurry to greet the darkness. With every step I took, the more the shadows seemed to appear. My once happy mood was beginning to dwindle. I felt as if the shadows were surrounding me, ready to attack. The darkness seemed familiar and it was suffocating. I could feel its long tendrils grabbing me and wrapping around me. I clutched my bag of food and strode even faster. Every once in a while the darkness gave me a panic attack like this. The doctors said I had been found in the middle of the night and that could be what caused these feelings, a memory hidden away in my mind. I think there was something more to it than that.

  What had happened to me that made me feel like this, to be scared of such little things?

  The tree branches clattering did not help my nerves. I studied everyone to make sure they weren’t part of the group of men I saw earlier. None were.

  A black cat ran right in front of me, hissing as I almost stepped on its tail. It slashed at my leg and then scurried away into the darkness. I nearly screamed. Stupid cat, almost gave me a heart attack. Wasn’t it bad luck when a black cat crossed your path? I think I saw a little bit of white on its chest. Yeah, I was going to keep telling myself that.

  I could see my apartment now and my muscles began to relax. I was safe now, I was almost back. I had escaped my fear and I could eat my Chinese in peace, without any cats hissing at me.

  Escape. The word resonated through my mind. Something pushed against my mind. A hand tried to grab me, but I shoved the person away. His face was covered in darkness, but I could hear his laughter, deep and frightening. Had I been escaping something when they found me?

  A wave of pain spiked through my head. Not again. My knees betrayed me and I almost fell to the ground. Luckily I was standing near a railing and grabbed it before I could fall. The food didn’t drop, thank goodness. My stomach would have killed me if I had spilt it all.

  After a moment, I shook off the feeling and pulled my keys out of my pocket. It was the third time today something like this had happened. Could it just be a coincidence?

  I unlocked the door to find my apartment was how I left it, bare and incomplete. It did look rather sad and empty. I didn’t want to settle in hoping I would find my true home. But a few weeks ago I caved, and got a real bed. I was tired of sleeping on a mattress on the floor.

  I set the food down on the table and opened the window. I needed fresh air without actually having to step outside again. I didn’t want a repeat of what had just happened and I really didn’t want that black cat to come back and claw me again. All I needed was to have to go to the doctor for some stitches or a rabies shot.

  I took in a deep breath of the crisp fall smell. It felt good. I was thankful this window actually worked, unlike the one in my bathroom which was stuck all the time. I had tried to get the landlord to fix it but he never seemed to remember.

  As I looked down at the street, I saw something out of the corner of my eye. At a second glance, there was nothing there. I looked around again but nothing seemed out of place. I swore I saw something moving around though. Maybe it was that cat again. Don’t get me wrong, I loved cats, I just didn’t like ones that tried to hurt me.

  I scanned around once more. It probably was nothing, just my imagination. Detective Johnson said they would have their men check around every once in a while, so I was completely safe. I could trust them, I knew, so I didn’t let it bother me anymore. I checked the locks on my door one more time, grabbed a fork and dug into my lemon chicken. The song “Umbrella” was still stuck in my head. Stupid repeating lyrics and catchy tune.

  Beep. Beep. Beep.

  I slammed my hand on my alarm clock. Was it morning already? I checked the time. 6:30. I rubbed my face with my palm. Ugh. I hated mornings.

  Reluctantly, I pulled myself out of bed and started the water for the shower. I had an hour to get ready for quantum physics, which unfortunately had to start at eight in the morning. It was like they wanted you to fail. I definitely was a night person, staying up late and staring at the stars. In the future, I would have to find a job where I could just stay up at night and not deal with mornings. Mornings wouldn’t even exist in my book. I would be a lot happier.

  Though, if I wanted my degree, I would have to endure early mornings so I might as well get it over with. I didn’t have a clue as to how long it was going to take me to finish my degree, especially since I was only taking three classes this term. I also would have to make up the credits I tested out of, which I found to be tedious. Why did I have to take more classes? It made no sense. I would have to start taking more credits, but for now I wanted to stick my toe in the water and see how it was. It was all new to me, after all. Or, at least, I thought it was. Maybe I already had a degree, which, actually, would really piss me off. I would be taking classes for nothing then.

  After drying my hair, putting on some fresh clothes and light makeup, I went in search of some breakfast. I needed to make a stop at a grocery store this week, I was out of everything. Luckily, there were enough cafes in Portland for everyone. I doubted any city had this many, except maybe somewhere in France. I wouldn’t know from experience, it’s just that every picture of Paris I had seen had a cafe in it.

  I grabbed a cup of English Breakfast and a cheese danish from Food For Thought Cafe and headed for class. I had left my books at home after Pete let me know that his older brother only took them to class if the professor said to, and so my backpack was super light. I was very thankful for that suggestion but did wonder how well his brother did in college. I just kept telling myself he did really well, that way my spine would be happy and I didn’t worry about it.

  The cool morning air felt soft on my skin and I breathed in its freshness. Everyo
ne said summer was the best time in Oregon but autumn was my favorite. The copper color that filled the sky and streets, scattered clouds all around, a rain shower here and there, just so it could water the plants and keep them beautiful. Too much rain was horrible, but autumn always seemed to be perfect in my book.

  I sipped some of the tea and nearly spit it out. Hot, really really hot. I managed to swallow it but not before burning my tongue and my throat in the process. Why did cafes always do that? Make the tea so piping hot that the customer always burnt themselves? It was stupid, it took over an hour for it to cool down, or thirty minutes when left out in the winter time. Next tea I bought I was going to ask for some ice cubes and not care if they gave me weird looks. I could see it now, “Do you want an iced tea?” “No, I just want a tea that doesn’t burn the skin off of my tongue”.

  Arriving to the classroom, I finished up the danish and hoped the professor wouldn’t mind me drinking tea. I heard some professors didn’t want any type of food or drink in their classroom, which never made sense to me. We are humans, we need to eat and drink. If they thought it was distracting, I think it is more distracting to be hungry and only thinking about what to eat once class was over. Not to mention my stomach grumbled louder than any other person and people would be staring at me. No, eating in classrooms should be permitted.

  The classroom was small, only a handful of chairs and desks. I only counted there to be twelve. Even fewer students seemed to be taking this class than astrophysics the day before. I took a chair near the middle, not wanting to be the student in the back, but also not wanting to stay in front.

  I was early, only two other students were already in the room. The one closest to me waved.

  “I haven’t seen you around here before, are you a transfer student?” He had curly black hair and a beard to match. Glasses hid away his green eyes.

  “No, this is my first semester actually,” I started pulling out my notebook and pencil for class.

  He combed his fingers through his beard, as if my answer was fascinating to him. “Ah, so you took some classes here and there to get the prereqs out of the way?”

  Actually I tested out of everything. “Sure.”

  “Right on, so you are majoring in physics then?”

  “Yeah, at least I am so far. Emphasis on astrophysics.”

  “Well, if you need anything or have any questions about the program, my name is Dennis. Don’t hesitate to ask. I know this place inside and out. I can show you where the student lounge is as well, and where the Society of Physics Students meets once a month. It’s a fun club where you can socialize with other students and talk about science.”

  “I would love that, thanks.”

  The professor stepped in and interrupted our conversation, which I was a bit disappointed about. Dr. McKenzie looked tired, just as Dr. Moph did, his blonde hair quickly spiked and rings still under his eyes. I don’t think anyone wanted to be awake. He introduced himself and readied the computer with his USB. He looked a little young to be the professor, especially compared to the astrophysics professor. Once all the data was transferred from his stickdrive, he started class.

  I took detailed notes, the lecture was fascinating. We only scratched the surface of what the semester was going to be about, but already I could tell it was going to be enjoyable and challenging. Many people would think me crazy, but I really didn’t care. I had found something that I enjoyed, and people who enjoyed it with me.

  Once class was out I had a couple of hours to spend on homework. History class was at one and then I didn’t have anything else until two tutoring sessions later that night. Knowing I would get more done on campus than back at my apartment, I started towards the library.

  The Branford Price Millar Library had a very unique style. Standing out in the middle of campus, the library was crescent shaped filled with windows looking out into the park. Golden leaves filled the lawn and students sat outside either working on school work or staring up at the sky. I debated joining the students sitting on the lawn and relaxing in the sun, but homework came first.

  I savored the scent of books. I loved books of every type; fiction and nonfiction, fantasy, literary, biology, history. Learning was a hobby, for me and since it was close to my apartment, I had spent a lot of time here reading random books I plucked off the shelves. It was the first thing I did trying to recover my memory, but no story ever seemed familiar to me. Before recently I couldn’t check out books because I wasn’t a student. But I was now. I couldn’t wait to check out my first book.

  I passed through the rows of shelves and past the reception desk. Mrs. Jennings waved at me from behind the reference desk and I waved back. Yeah, I spent way too much time here already and it was only my first day of school. I passed her by and started up the stairs.

  Heading up to the third floor, I decided to find a place next to the windows so I could look outside. It was such a nice day that I had to be able to see it, rather than hide away in some corner with shelves surrounding me as I normally did. It felt like my own secret area since rarely anyone else went into the section I favored. I did find one couple making out there once, but other than that I rarely found any people.

  I would have worked on homework outside, but wind always swept up the paper and I would lose my spot both in the book I was reading and in the notebook I took notes in. No, unless it was the perfect day, I learned not to try and work outside. It was the one time I drew a good scribble too and I watched it fly away down the street into a puddle. I tried to save it but the water made it look like a big blob.

  Grabbing a table near the windows, I pulled out my notebook and wrote my name and the date on the top of the page. I tapped my pencil next to the date I wrote. September 28th. The first anniversary of my “accident”. My fingers grasped automatically for my necklace. Was that why I felt so weird this week?

  At least they said it was an accident. The doctors thought I had been thrown out of a car near Portland’s Chinatown. Someone found me passed out on the street with cuts and bruises all over my body. They called the police and I was taken to the hospital. My first memory was waking up in OHSU and seeing strange men in white hovering over me. Scariest experience ever. I had a few broken ribs, lacerations on my arms and legs, and a giant bruise on my head. They asked me who I was and I couldn’t answer them. They asked me where I was from and I still couldn’t answer them. When I was found, I was wearing a necklace with the name Angela Starr etched on it. Angela Starr. That was all they had to work with.

  In reality, that might not even be my name. It was written on the necklace I had but it could have been anything. Was it someone else’s name? Was it the designer’s trademark? I had no idea, but it felt right to be called Angela. So I kept it.

  Focusing back on my homework, I started the first problem, calculations using the new equations Dr. Moph had given us. Hopefully he had used the correct one this time, but I doubted it.

  Surprising enough, he didn’t make a mistake with the equations. I had no problem with any of the questions and didn’t need the textbook for any of it. Everything was in my notebook. He must have made it easy for the first week. Very unlike him.

  I scribbled in my to-do list, knocking off that piece of homework. With a smirk of satisfaction, I went to the next item: quantum physics. I shuffled through my purple notebook, pulling up the notes from class today. With the information still fresh in my mind, the homework took me a half an hour to finish. I leaned back in my chair and checked the time. It wasn’t even eleven yet, which gave me time to grab a bite to eat before history class. I wondered if every homework assignment would be this simple.

  Twirling the pencil between my fingers, I debated whether or not I should add another class to the mix. I still had time to register and would have only missed one class. The homework didn’t seem too bad and I would be able to graduate faster. I decided not to, I didn’t want to get ahead of myself. I didn’t want to be that student who piles everything on themselves
only to barely make it through the end of the semester. I would take it easy for now.

  I recognized a student from PHY 475 walking past by his short red hair since I had been sitting behind him in class. He hung his backpack off one shoulder, which looked very uncomfortable. I waved at him awkwardly, my social skills weren’t the greatest. But he smiled and walked over and glanced at the homework I had just finished. “You working on that too? I tried to do it last night, couldn’t get past the second question. The equations he gave us don’t seem to apply to the problems.”

  “You just have to rearrange them and combine. It’s simple, see?” I showed him how I had done it.

  “Wow! That’s clever! Did the book show that?” he asked.

  “No, I left the book in my apartment.”

  “Well, we know who’s getting an ‘A’ this semester,” he spun around and walked off. Had I offended him? I didn’t mean to.

  Rubbing my face with my palms, I sighed. That was my fear, that people would think I was a freak. I knew that he was probably a jerk anyway, because who would be rude like that instead of wanting me to help them with homework. My tutoring students loved it and they were always nice about it. Yeah, he was probably just jealous. Dennis was friendly as well, I would hold onto that thought.

  My attention turned to the lawn in front of the library. I could see students cruising by, exploring their future, making new friends... and here I was with no idea where I was headed. I liked astrophysics and space, but what exactly did I want to do with that? Did I want to become a professor? Do research? But do research on what? There were so many possibilities, it was overwhelming.

  Funny, for all the things I knew, why couldn’t I know myself?

  As I stared outside, two figures caught my eye. Two men in black were staring up at the library windows. Scarface and Muscleman. Were they watching me? I shuddered. They were looking up here, maybe it was just coincidence. Just like the day before. I shook my head. No, from what I had learned from the Doctor and all his crazy companions was that there were no coincidences.