Being Alpha

by Aileen Erin

  I could believe that was the case for other Alphas, but I wasn’t sure that applied to me. I knew I was a strong werewolf, but that didn’t mean that I had to be a pack Alpha. That was a lot of responsibility. Would I ever want to tie myself down like that?

  For now, all I really wanted was to get away from the demon.

  “You got away.”

  “No, I didn’t. Not for long.” I shook my head slowly. “I think I just mostly pissed it off.” What are we going to do?

  We’re going to take it one step at a time, like we always do.

  That was a good plan, but the first step was figuring out who the demon was, what exactly its powers were, and how to break a demonic tie. I wasn’t sure what seal the demon had been talking about, but if the portal was to Hell and I was somehow the key, then there was much more on the line than just my soul.

  Five

  The line rang and rang. If there was a more annoying sound, I hadn’t heard it. My knee bounced. It was fully dark, we were minutes away from St. Ailbe’s, and I still hadn’t been able to get ahold of Claudia.

  “She’s fine, chérie.”

  I wanted to snap at him. Dastien didn’t know that Claudia was fine, but he was trying to stay positive, while I was imagining that the demon was torturing her.

  I sighed as voicemail picked up for the millionth time today. “Hi! You’ve reached Claudia. I’m sorr—” I cut off the recording and threw my phone in the cup holder of Dastien’s black SUV. We’d only been planning on being gone for a couple of weeks, so we’d left it at the airport. I wasn’t sure how much that had cost, but I was glad to be alone for the first time today.

  “Maybe she doesn’t have it on her. She only recently got the cell, right?”

  He had a point. “I guess that could be true.” But it didn’t make me any less anxious.

  We’d had a long day of travel. I’d nodded off a few times during the car ride to the airport, but the sleep had been in little spurts and didn’t add up to anything nearly sufficient.

  If I was being honest, I couldn’t blame the fact that I hadn’t slept on the travel. Every second that passed felt like a second closer to the demon coming for me again. I’d closed my eyes, willing myself to sleep, but it was too much like the black nothingness I’d wandered through yesterday.

  I spent time googling how to break a demon’s tie, but there wasn’t a ton of information out there about them. Until I had a specific demon to research, I was SOL. Plus, I wasn’t sure I could trust anything I found on the internet. Too much was on the line to put all my hope in something I found from an unverified source.

  I’d texted with Meredith what was going on before we got on the plane. She said she was down to do some research in the Irish pack’s library, but she couldn’t leave. The pack there was still coming back from all their drama. Which was a bummer, but I got it. I’d managed to talk to my mom for a second to tell her we were coming home. She was worried, but said she’d be there to help if she could.

  What I really needed first was to get ahold of Claudia.

  She’d managed to help me snap the demon’s control once, and if I knew the specifics of the spell, then maybe I could do it myself to prevent him from doing it again. Maybe she’d know some way to break a demonic tie. At the very least, if she could just overnight some of those crystals she found in Peru that saved Raphael, then maybe I could use them to fight the demon.

  I grabbed the cell phone and dialed Claudia again.

  “Chérie. She’ll call you when she can.”

  My knee bounced faster as I held my breath, waiting—hoping—that this time would be the time Claudia answered. “This is bad. With what happened, she should’ve called us by now.” I chewed on a fingernail.

  “Maybe she’s been traveling, too? For all we know, she could be on her way here.”

  That would explain it, but we didn’t know that for sure. “Or maybe saving me hurt her.”

  “We’d know if something was wrong.”

  “Would we?” Because I wasn’t so sure that we’d know anything unless she died. There was a whole spectrum of not okay between being alive and being dead.

  While I usually loved Dastien’s cup-half-full attitude, I was feeling more like the fucking cup was empty.

  I’d been calling Claudia all day—well, at least every time I had service—and I still couldn’t get ahold of her. Last night I’d been able to brush it off, but I couldn’t do that anymore. My stomach was churning with the thought that she might need my help, especially after she’d saved my ass. Until I heard word from her or someone in Peru, I just had to wait. But waiting around was not my strong suit.

  Dastien flicked on the blinker. “We’re here.”

  I looked up from my phone to see the break in the brick walls that separated St. Ailbe’s from the outside world. As we pulled up, the massive black wrought iron gates opened, letting us into the parking lot. It was odd not to see any reporters at the entrance, but it’d been six weeks since we’d been here. Hopefully, the constant stream of reporters had died down for good. The ten Cazadores guarding the gates might have finally become a deterrent. Or maybe it was the demon attacks.

  Either way, that was one thing I wasn’t sorry to see go.

  Dastien waved to them as he passed and then pulled into a spot right by the path to campus. As soon as he stopped, I swung open the door and breathed in. Pine. Cedar. Dirt. Home.

  The last took me by surprise. I wasn’t sure when St. Ailbe’s had become my home. I’d lived in Los Angeles most of my life. We’d only moved here at the beginning of the school year, and it was almost Thanksgiving now. But oddly enough, St. Ailbe’s was the only place I’d ever felt free to be myself, even if this version of me turned furry every once in a while.

  “I thought you’d never get here,” a familiar voice said, and I spun in time to see Chris coming around the bend in the path. The sight of my friend made my anxiety ease a bit. I could focus on something a little more trivial—Chris and his need for a haircut. His dirty blonde hair looked like it might almost be long enough to pull back into a small ponytail and he had a full beard. He’d said he was tired in his email, but his easy grin was in place as he opened his arms, pulling me in for a hug.

  “Hey,” I said. “After nineteen hours of travel, it’s really nice to not be moving.”

  “I bet.” After one last squeeze, he stepped away from me.

  Chris’ blue eyes were the color of the clear summer sky. Like just about every other werewolf I’d met, he was well over six feet tall and thick with muscle. The beard made him look older and a bit more rugged. He was wearing a faded navy polo under a gray hoodie and a pair of dark jeans. Which was good. That meant he still wasn’t into being a Cazador, even if he’d stuck around to fight demons. He was too chill and calm to join their numbers, but he’d stuck around to do what was right. That was one of the many reasons why he was amazing.

  He narrowed his gaze, apparently noticing my too long once-over. “What?” He asked.

  “Nothing. Can’t I just be happy to see you?”

  “You sure can,” he said with his slight Texas drawl. He gave me a big grin that made his eyes shine. The guy was a flirt. He just couldn’t help himself. “I missed you, too.”

  “Quit flirting with my mate.” Dastien teased him as he stepped beside me.

  Chris pulled him in for one of those manly hug-back patting combos.

  “What’s going on?” Dastien asked. “Anything we need to worry about tonight?”

  Chris looked over to the Cazadores. “Still nothing, right?”

  One of them nodded. “Quiet as far as I know.”

  “Good,” I said. “Because I’d like to get settled.” I reached into the car for my backpack.

  Dastien was getting the bags out of the back. “Go on ahead. I’m going to chat with them and then catch up.”

  Chris started walking down the path, and I followed. “So, important things first,” I said.

  “What’s u
p?”

  “Your hair. A beard? What’s the deal?” I poked his beard, and he swatted my hand away. It suited him, but as a friend, I couldn’t let it by with at least asking.

  He rubbed a hand over his stubble. “Been too busy running around to shave. After a while, it seemed like a bother. Same with the hair.” He shrugged. “I’ve been spending so much time as a wolf that it doesn’t matter.”

  “How are you holding up? Your emails sounded pretty crazed toward the end.”

  He blew out a breath. “I’m tired. You know me. I’ve trained like the rest of them, but it’s not my thing. I enjoy life too much to go around hunting every night.” He was quiet for a second. “You know, I never thought I’d see another one of them after Santa Fe, but they keep coming. Sometimes it’s just one, but sometimes its twenty. We—”

  “Twenty? Jesus. No wonder you’re tired.”

  “Yeah. We gotta do something to stop it or we’re going to die trying to keep up.”

  “Agreed. How’s Adrian?”

  “Good. The guy was made to be a Cazador. He’s pretty much all but joined them. He loves a good fight. Aside from the demon bite, he’s been having fun. The bite is still healing, but he’s back on patrols tonight.”

  “Already? Any chance that it could lead to a demon possession?” I hoped not, but we couldn’t be too sure.

  “Nah. He’s good. We did the usual holy water and potion routine. I’m sure he’d like a little downtime, but we need every Were we have.”

  That didn’t seem smart to me. If we didn’t have time for injured Weres to fully heal, then things were much worse than I’d thought.

  “We’ll figure out why they keep coming.” I just wasn’t sure how we’d find the answer exactly, but I needed to make sure that Luciana didn’t have any leftover magic brewing somewhere on the old witch’s compound. But there wasn’t a chance I was stepping foot on that place until sunrise.

  “All I know is I’m not the only one getting tired. We don’t have enough wolves to keep this pace for much longer. We’re all exhausted…which reminds me.”

  I thought I knew what he was getting at, but I wasn’t sure. “Go ahead. Ask.”

  “You going to tell me what you were up against last night? Felt you pulling as if your life depended on it.”

  “It was depending on it. I, uh…” I wasn’t sure how to say it, but I finally decided just to spit it out. “A demon took control of my mind and was trying to drag me to Hell,” I said so quickly that my words ran into each other.

  “What the fuck, Tessa!” His mouth dropped open and even under the beard, I could see his skin had paled.

  I winced. “That sounded bad.”

  “Hell, yes. It sounds pretty much like the worst. And with these demon attacks, I’m not liking it one bit.”

  “Me, neither.” I blew out a breath. “Me, neither,” I said again, softer this time.

  I checked my phone for the millionth time, just in case I’d somehow missed it vibrating. Nothing. The screen had zero alerts. I shoved the phone into the back pocket of my jeans, promising myself that once I was in my room, I was going to call her nonstop until she picked up.

  “Anyway, I’m sorry if you’re exhausted, but thanks for the help. I really—”

  “Please. Stop. I only brought it up because I was worried.” He nudged me. “You take what you need. That’s what the Alpha does.”

  “I’m not the Alpha,” I mumbled.

  “You say that, but we all know it’s not true. That first gym class, we knew you’d become our alpha.”

  “I’m no one’s alpha.” And it bugged me that both he and Dastien thought that.

  “Maybe not yet, but you’ll get your own pack soon.”

  I was under the impression that I didn’t have to do anything I didn’t want to, and I for sure didn’t want to rule a pack. But arguing with him wasn’t going to change his mind. Still, I was curious what he was talking about. “Remind me what happened in gym class. Because I have no clue what you’re talking about.”

  He gave me a raspy laugh. For some reason, Chris always sounded like he had a pack-a-day smoking habit, but he swore he never touched them. “We were running laps in the gym. Mr. Dawson was with us. Remember now?”

  “No.”

  “Really?” With the way his voice pitched up, he sounded genuinely surprised.

  Even if there’d been some big moment, I didn’t remember it. “Between being bitten and all that crap with Imogene and then Luciana and the demons, I don’t remember my first gym class. I remember the first time I tried to spar. Is that what you’re talking about?” My cheeks heated with the memory of practicing with Chris and how Dastien reacted. And I still couldn’t believe I’d pretty much attacked Meredith.

  “No, but that was hilarious,” he said, and my cheeks burned hotter. “When we run as a pack, the Alpha sets the pace, so Mr. Dawson set the footfalls. Everyone was in time except for you. Which should’ve been impossible.”

  That did sound vaguely familiar, but I remembered it differently. “I just didn’t like being a monkey. Following the lead. You know? It rubbed me the wrong way.”

  “Which is exactly why you’re our next Alpha.”

  I wasn’t sure he was right, but Dastien had already said the same thing to me. Maybe that was how it’d worked in the past, but I refused to believe I had to lead a pack. Saying that wasn’t going to get me anywhere, though. Werewolves were set in their ways.

  We hit the end of the path, and I paused, taking in the campus. If I didn’t have werewolf eyesight, then I would’ve been stumbling around in the dark.

  There were usually lights in the trees surrounding the quad and the pathways between the buildings. Tonight, the lights in front of the doors to the cafeteria and dorm buildings were the only ones lit. The ones for the admin/med unit and the classrooms were out, as well as the quad and pathways.

  “Why are the lights out?”

  “Campus is technically closed. We’re only here to use it as a base for patrols, and it’s better for us if it’s dark. Easier on our eyes.”

  “Right.” I knew that campus was closed, but the darkness felt wrong to me. It was usually so well lit, and before curfew started, people were always wandering around. And not only that, the quad was always perfectly mowed which always struck me as such a stark contrast to the forest that threatened to swallow up the school’s five squat brick buildings.

  Today it was quiet and dark, and it looked like the lawn hadn’t been mowed in weeks. The bushes and plants in front of the buildings were overgrown. It felt like I’d walked into the middle of a zombie movie. A team of Cazadores patrolling in wolf form caught my eye. The ten wolves weaved in and out of the trees across the quad as they made their rounds.

  Maybe I wasn’t that far off from reality. The once-thriving school had turned into a ghost town. Goose bumps rose along my arms and I rubbed them away.

  Don’t let it get to you. The school will come back and—

  You don’t know that. With everything that had happened, I wouldn’t be surprised if the temporary closure turned permanent.

  Why are you even in the quad? Dastien sent along the bond, changing the subject. Because I was right and we both knew it.

  What do you mean? I’m on my way to my— Wow. I was an idiot. Oh. Right. “I can’t believe I did this, but in my defense, I’m pretty worn out. I need to head that way.” I pointed to the now-overgrown path that led around the admin building.

  Chris huffed a raspy-laugh as we changed directions. “Sorry. I was on autopilot.”

  “Me, too.” The drama of the day before on top of the day of travel was clearly catching up to me. “So, what else has been going on?”

  “Besides demons?” Chris blew out a breath. “Not much.”

  “Any word from Cosette?”

  “Some.” He shrugged. “She’s doing fine but feeling a little cooped up in the Underhill. I think it’d been a while since she was stuck at home for so long.”

&n
bsp; We weren’t ten feet from the cabin when Dastien came running out of the front door, holding his cellphone. “I’m putting you on speaker. Tessa and Chris just got here.”

  “Hey!” Adrian’s voice came through the line. “I’ve got a situation on la Alquelarre’s land.”

  I looked at Dastien, but he shook his head. Which meant it wasn’t the demon that attacked. “What’s going on?”

  “There’s some guy here asking for you,” Adrian said.

  “A demon?”

  “No. Definitely not a demon.” He sounded pretty firm about that.

  “A witch?” I asked.

  “I don’t think so.” His voice pitched up, which meant it could be a witch.

  “Fey?” Chris asked.

  “Maybe? Honestly, I’m not sure what he is, but says he’s got information for you about the demon that attacked you last night. He says it’s urgent.”

  This could be a trap, but I think we have to go. Any information could be a huge help. Dastien said through the bond.

  Agreed. Was I nervous? Sure. Especially after last night, but if this guy had information for me—even if he was only going to spout out a ton of lies—I had to go.

  I chucked my backpack in the general direction of our front porch. “You coming with?” I asked Chris.

  “Yeah.” He rubbed a hand along his beard. “Guess I should, just in case.”

  “We’ll be there in twenty to twenty-five,” Dastien said.

  “Make it quicker. I don’t know how long this guy will wait, and he just saved our asses.”

  “On it.” Dastien hung up the phone, and tucked it into his pocket as he leapt off of the porch.

  As we sprinted back through the woods to the parking lot, I couldn’t believe I was about to willingly go to la Aquelarre’s land at night. It seemed pretty convenient that this person showed up right when we got home. But I had to trust Adrian to know an enemy when he saw it. If this guy was out to hurt me, none of the Cazadores would have wasted the time on a phone call, especially not my friend.