Ever Lost (Secret Affinity Book 2)
Page 21
Jade
Chapter 38
“This movie is really boring,” I say.
“I told you,” Mateo answers.
“No you didn’t.” I giggle. “You said it was good.”
“Did I?”
He’s holding me. I’m in front of him on my side, and he’s behind me where the cushions should be. Mateo tossed them on the floor, and we assumed this position together as if it was a perfectly normal thing to do, even though we both know it’s not. In our hearts, we know that cuddling like this while watching a movie is not regular friendship behavior. No one in the history of the world has ever believed that cuddling like this is platonic.
I also know that cuddling on the couch with him could be construed as teasing. I don’t want to be a tease, but when I snuggle with Mateo, I don’t think about breaking up with Charlie. I don’t feel depressed, and I don’t feel sad. I feel happy. My feelings for Mateo are slowly overtaking my sadness about Charlie.
“When is your dad coming home?” he asks, rubbing my shoulder.
“I don’t know. There was a party, so it might be late.”
“Really?” He places a soft kiss near my temple, his breath hot on my ear.
“Mateo…”
“What?” he asks, doing it again.
“Stop.”
“Why?”
“Because you don’t want me to kiss you if I’m still thinking about him.”
“No. But maybe if you did, you’d stop thinking about him, and you’d start to think about me.”
He kisses my bare shoulder near the edge of my tank top strap, his eyes trained on my face. I like the heat of his body against mine, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t attracted to him. I’ve been attracted to him from the start. He’s sweet, sexy, and fantastically funny, so none of that is the issue. Charlie’s the issue. I don’t want to do what Charlie expects me to—what he thought I was already doing.
“What if I said I might be ready to kiss you?” I ask. “Would that make you happy?”
“You know it would.”
“And would you leave me? If I finally gave in to everything, would you dump me?” I take his hand from around my waist, bring it up to my lips, and kiss his palm.
He gulps and exhales loudly through his nose. “No.” His voice is husky, filled with barely restrained desire.
“That’s what everyone at school says,” I whisper. “That you’ll leave me as soon as you get what you want.”
He shakes his head and grips me tighter. “No. Maybe with other girls but not with you.”
“You don’t care that I’m not over him?” I focus my eyes straight ahead when I say this. I can’t look at him.
“I know you will be. I can help you forget him.” He whispers this in my ear, sending waves of sensation coursing through my body.
“Promise?” I roll into him, dropping to my back. I finally meet his eyes.
“I promise to try.” He drops his face to mine, his lips just centimeters from sealing the deal.
I stare into his eyes, and he doesn’t waver. He only waits. His patience is incredible, and I know the time has come. I tilt my face up and capture his lips with mine. I’m ready. Finally. I want to forget. I want Mateo to help me forget.
The kiss is soft, gentle, yet filled with passion. When we stop for breath, he sighs loudly, his hand cradling my face.
“God, Jade. I’ve waited forever for you.” He kisses my cheek, hovering over me in continued anticipation.
“I know. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being so messed up.”
“You aren’t. You’re amazing. I think I’m in love with you.” He kisses near my ear.
“Teo…”
“It’s okay. I know you can’t say it. Just kiss me and don’t stop, okay?”
His lips are so close, practically touching mine again.
“Okay,” I answer.
Right now, kissing Mateo is all I want to do. When we’re kissing, I don’t feel the pain of losing Charlie. I don’t feel the tug and burn in my chest or the tears waiting to fall. All I feel is someone who wants me, someone who can’t get enough of me, someone who says he’ll never let me go. That’s what I want to feel. That’s what I need right now.
About the Author
Melissa MacVicar lives with her husband and two children on Nantucket Island. She loves classic rock, watching football, and reading anything romantic and suspenseful. She survived prep school, and was brave enough to attend her college reunion.
When she turned forty, Melissa decided to renew her adolescent passion for fiction writing. Having once thought publishing a novel to be an impossible dream, she’s proud to be achieving her lifelong goal. In addition to writing, she’s a full-time teacher, an avid runner, and a somewhat reluctant tri-athlete.
Acknowledgments
To my husband, Angus, and my children, Eileen and Joel: I couldn’t have written this book without you. I will always be grateful for your words of encouragement when the going got tough.
To my editors, Joann Richardson and Lynn McNamee: Thank you for your thorough and skillful work on this book.
To Elizabeth, Traci, and Stephen: Your moral support and plot help were invaluable.
To Elin Hilderbrand: Thank you for your encouragement and for sharing your writerly wisdom so freely.
To the Nantucket community: I have been overwhelmed by your support. So many of you have reached out and embraced me as a writer. I truly do live in an amazing place.
Titles By The Author
EVER NEAR: Secret Affinity Book 1
EVER LOST: Secret Affinity Book 2
ONE BROKEN DAY